People that attract decent people vs people who don't

aniyas said:

Agreed with ardentika. I've struggled a great deal with self-esteem and self-negation, and throughout my youth I CONSTANTLY attracted people who could not bear to shift attention away from themselves and their achievements, and were extremely manipulative (some I could categorise as narcissists with some certainty). I also kept attracting people with rage issues. Astrology helped me grow personally, take a hard look at some latent unpleasantries within my own self, and I haven't encountered / put up with that sort of thing in quite a while while being comfortable with my sensitivity.

I think it's incorrect to simply say that empaths attract narcissists. While the two might feel drawn to each other, whether or not an empath responds to this desire to connect is a direct function of how self-aware and secure they are in their styles of attachment. If positive, it won't evolve into a friendship or relationship in the first place.

Click to expand...

I also agree with ardentika. And from personal experience I can say that all people I know that had been involved with narcissists have childhood wounds (some just have been raised in "dysfunctional" or single-parent families). People involved with narcissists might be empaths but they aren't totally Zen neither light beings.

Well, that's what I've seen.

ardentika said:

Because most of the times codependent people are such who would undermine their own value out of fear of being alone. So again you attract exactly what you are. Someone undermining your value and playing with you. A person with normal self esteem would never attract such a person, even if they do they won't fall in the trap. To change the people you attract you gotta change yourself and astrology can help you with that.

In this case its not even about codependency or empaths I feel more as it is about self worth and self esteem. I am too somewhat codependent and an empath when I want to and I can tell a narcissist a mile away and just know to keep them within healthy boundaries.

Click to expand...

I feel that Narcissists and other related PDs have this sort of extrasensory antenna; an almost supernatural ability (negatively used) into a potential target's blind spots and vulnerabilities. They sense, hook into, manipulate and exploit.

Every single time I've unknowingly attracted one I deep dive and analyze my own thought process, wishes, desires, etc, and I always come away with a blind spot or two that wasn't visible to me before at a conscious level.

However, I realize not everyone has the ability to be honest with themselves, or are capable of rational, self-awareness. Some people rather escape and delude themselves than face the truth.

I feel each experience is best used to fortify our own blind spots for ourselves. And as far as blind spots goes, Neptune / Pisces energy is a huge player, as well as latent moon/venus issues for unfulfilled emotional needs, which a codependent type usually project externally.
.

GemwDepth said:

I feel that Narcissists and other related PDs have this sort of extrasensory antenna; an almost supernatural ability (negatively used) into a potential target's blind spots and vulnerabilities. They sense, hook into, manipulate and exploit.

Every single time I've unknowingly attracted one I deep dive and analyze my own thought process, wishes, desires, etc, and I always come away with a blind spot or two that wasn't visible to me before at a conscious level.

However, I realize not everyone has the ability to be honest with themselves, or are capable of rational, self-awareness. Some people rather escape and delude themselves than face the truth.

I feel each experience is best used to fortify our own blind spots for ourselves. And as far as blind spots goes, Neptune / Pisces energy is a huge player, as well as latent moon/venus issues for unfulfilled emotional needs, which a codependent type usually project externally.
.

Click to expand...

I don't think this is true. I don't know why people assume ALWAYS that Narcissist do everything consciously. As if their victim is doing it consciously too and thinking "Oh yes I want to get hurt, please, someone, mistreat me" . That's ridiculous.


Why everyone expects that from a narcissist. First of all a narcissist is NOT a pd. Its a personality trait and it's pretty much an academical term used for an "as*hole" . It's not the same as a sociopath or psycopath.



So they are not doing it by any means on purpose, they just love themselves more than they love anyone else, that's all. That doesn't make them evil masterminds lol.


I have pretty much all of the issues you explain, Pisces Asc, Moon square Venus, and I've attracted a potential sociopath only ones in my life. Definitely felt something was off and set boundaries. But yes most of the times I do attract narcissists lol. Better said self absorbed guys, however they are by no meas doing it on purpose. It's just lack of awareness, they are all good people who I can rely on , when they deal with the selfishness.



Plus those aspects cannot be an excuse. They won't last forever, they just demand attention and healing.

Not interested in debating on technical terms. I've studied the subject matter for years, both the scientific nomenclatures of beliefs, religious sectors and spiritual beliefs.

My use of PD in the scientific nomenclature refers to the Cluster-B personality disorders within the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) - Narcissism, ASPD, Borderline, Histrionics.

My use of the term Narcissist or Narcissism do not refer to typical self-centered behavior of mainstream populations. Many of those words you mention are overused and typically confused within the mainstream.

I don't know what type of 'Narcissists' you're talking about. Apples and oranges perhaps (?).

I am talking about clinically diagnosed, pathological behavior categorized in Psychiatry. All Cluster-Bs possess certain similarities, hence categorized within one umbrella in the DSM.

Starsareround said:

Oh, hell yeah! Neptune transits will have you doubting your BS detector big time!
...there was this guy I met during Neptune transit. So, so attractive but he would say odd things sometimes that got my red flags up. Ordinarily I would always just nip it anytime I got that vibe with someone, but Neptune kept me fooled
I ended up giving him a lot more time and energy than I ever should have, and I look back and think how odd that was...NEPTUNE...

Click to expand...

I second that and I still have it transiting 7th.