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Horary Questions on Relational Issues For horary questions about relationships.


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  #1  
Unread 12-27-2015, 12:26 AM
carol-a carol-a is offline
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does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

hello horary enthusiasts ..

what else does one do over the holiday season other than dive further into their astro practice? attempting my first horary right now and could use some guidance.

the question: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

some background: we were in a serious relationship for nearly 2 years, and at the lunar eclipse back in late september after being apart for a month due to me: canadian, he: american (border restrictions), he went *poof* and seemed to lose interest in our future together. granted, his ex was back in the picture (we were in a polyamorous relationship, so i was cool with it).. we stopped communicating after i felt him drift away, confronted him on it without much feeling on his part, and then stopped making plans for me to come back to the states. i started my life up again in canada while nursing a broken heart, and 3 months in i'm healing. then, who sends me an e-mail on the solstice, but him, re opening a lot of questions and memories. and hurt feelings. he tells me he thinks of me often and wonders about me, and tells me what he's doing.

why i'm asking: i'm still in love with him and i want him in my life. yet for sure i can see that i would probably be mad to have him back given the total lack of respect he showed me when he left me. i need some closure either way. i know i can just 'wait and see' but, y'know, horary.

OK!

in the horary:

querent : AS virgo -- significator mercury in cap/4th house
quesited: DES pisces -- significator: jupiter in virgo/1st house (conj AS)

mercury is applying to jupiter in near exact trine

moon: 0 degrees cancer/10th house


co-significators:

querent (venus) det. scorpio in 3rd separating from both jupiter and mercury in sextile

quesited (sun) capricorn in 4th - moon applying in opposition

jupiter is in its detriment in virgo, though in reception with mercury. mercury is in capricorn, which is the sign of jupiter's fall. i am not totally sure what this is signifying. but as they are in an applying trine aspect, there must be some mutual thought between the two of us.

jupiter is conjunct ascendant -- ?

pof conjunct descendant in 7th (signifying my hopes that he does want to continue our relationship?)

i feel like there is some interest there, but with jupiter in its detriment, and my significator in jupiter's fall, while venus is in detriment, there seems to be a lack of confidence some where.

image.jpg

ahh. maybe someone can help me begin to decipher this. thank you for any feedback and offerings!

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  #2  
Unread 12-27-2015, 01:40 AM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

It seems to me the more important underlying question may be, if he still wants a relationship with you, will that relationship be nurturing, supportive, in your best interest?

There is mutual [albeit negative from him to you] reception and also an exact applying trine between your primary significators. This suggests to me that the two of you could very well get together. As to whether or not it is a satisfying union, I would be concerned about his/Jupiter's reception toward you/Mercury. It is not favorable and is in keeping with how you describe his treatment of you in the past.

I would be very wary.

Moon as indicator for the question's overall unfolding, applies to an opposition and is in negative reception to Sun. This, too, to me does not bode well for the overall outcome.
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  #3  
Unread 12-27-2015, 08:45 AM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

the problem is reception from jupiter to merc is pretty sh*tty. Full moon is almost a never a good sign.. yes merc/jupiter trine but can it lead to a long term relationship? i doubt it.
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Unread 12-27-2015, 11:22 AM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

Interesting, I can see the situation you describe in the chart. The ex is Venus, and Venus had an aspect with Jupiter. Jupiter is in fall of Venus, so he doesn't have warm thoughts of her.

Jupiter in your sign an house does show his strong interest in you. The trine between your significators is there, suggesting coming together. But as others pointed out reception is one sided. I look at it from Frawley's point of view, Mercury is in fall of Jupiter, however Moon exalts Jupiter. So there is this head and heart split. Your heart puts him on a pedestal, your head, the thinking logical part dislikes him. And that's the part that trines his significators. Interesting! Moon/Sun opposition suggest separation or crisis of some sort. If you do get together, you may not trust him to be there for you and well Venus is perhaps still hanging around.

Mercury will also soon after Jupiter, square Mars, perhaps frustration or arguments?

As others pointed out, longterm relationship is not looking like a possibility right now. Both your significators are about to rx soon. I wonder that has some meaning for the question. Both retreating?
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Unread 01-06-2016, 01:33 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

May i ask some questions, using this chart as an example?
I hope it serves carolannimals interests as well!
The chart shows some aspects and placements which i have seen before in other charts and have tried to read, but didn't really know how to do so. Maybe you can help me with this?

I see Moon(2nd sign.for her) at the cusp of his, the quesited's 5th sign/place (turned 11th), and see Sun (2nd sign.for him) at the cusp of her 5th sign/place.
Would you read this as important , or let's say "speaking"?
And if so, what do they mean?

Then, Jupiter, the quesited's significator is in a nearly exact opposition to PoF. Sometimes PoF seems to be important in charts.
Here, while it is right at the cusp of the 7th, this importance might be given, ?? - how would one then read it?
As a general luck in the querent's love relationships? (7th place), or as luck in this specific connection?
- and the opposition to Jupiter? how would one read this?

And finally, both, Jupiter and Mercury have an applying aspect with NN, -
does this point towards an experience both will go through that make them go a step forward, make them "learn" something?

I'd be very grateful if someone find the time to answer!
-- Thank you all, Oleanna
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Unread 01-06-2016, 03:32 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

I kind of disagree a bit here:

To me, Jupiter inside the 1st house (and the sign of the querent), shows he is interested in her. He is interested a lot. And the Moon in Jupiter's exaltation shows the feelings being reciprocated by the querent.

I see the other girl (his ex that is back) as Saturn. That is why Mercury is in her sign, shows her concern with her. Saturn is also in Jupiter's sign, and Jupiter is in Saturn's term. As rafaella pointed out:

Quote:
"So there is this head and heart split"
Which is true. But that is why Mercury is in Jupiter's fall, she probably can't stand the fact that the other girl is with him (or something along those lines). Mercury can only be in Jupiter's fall, by being ruled by Saturn (Capricorn).

To me he is interested in a relationship, but probably in a polyamourous one as before: Sun is in Saturn sign, and will be for a long time...he probably does not want to stop seeing his ex, but he does want the querent too.

The question was if the quesited still wanted a relationship: he probably does, just not one the querent may like.
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Last edited by Dirius; 01-06-2016 at 03:47 PM.
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  #7  
Unread 01-06-2016, 03:43 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

Quote:
Originally Posted by oleanna View Post
May i ask some questions, using this chart as an example?
I hope it serves carolannimals interests as well!
The chart shows some aspects and placements which i have seen before in other charts and have tried to read, but didn't really know how to do so. Maybe you can help me with this?

1) I see Moon(2nd sign.for her) at the cusp of his, the quesited's 5th sign/place (turned 11th), and see Sun (2nd sign.for him) at the cusp of her 5th sign/place.
Would you read this as important , or let's say "speaking"?
And if so, what do they mean?

2) Then, Jupiter, the quesited's significator is in a nearly exact opposition to PoF. Sometimes PoF seems to be important in charts.
Here, while it is right at the cusp of the 7th, this importance might be given, ?? - how would one then read it?
As a general luck in the querent's love relationships? (7th place), or as luck in this specific connection?
- and the opposition to Jupiter? how would one read this?

And finally, both, Jupiter and Mercury have an applying aspect with NN, -
does this point towards an experience both will go through that make them go a step forward, make them "learn" something?

I'd be very grateful if someone find the time to answer!
-- Thank you all, Oleanna
1) Usually the Moon's location does indeed show something relevant to the chart, however if the aformentioned house isn't exactly relevant to the subject at hand, it may very well be ignored. Perhaps the Moon's placement is there to show us the sign she is in, and not the house per se (given that Cancer is a sign related to the ruler of the 7th house, Jupiter).

2) POF is usually associated with material gain (money, profit, fortune, etc.). Unless the chart is concerned with that, its usually meaningless.
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  #8  
Unread 01-06-2016, 04:42 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

First of all, thanks a lot!
It's a joy to have you back in the forum


Quote:
Originally Posted by Dirius View Post
1) Usually the Moon's location does indeed show something relevant to the chart, however if the aformentioned house isn't exactly relevant to the subject at hand, it may very well be ignored. Perhaps the Moon's placement is there to show us the sign she is in, and not the house per se (given that Cancer is a sign related to the ruler of the 7th house, Jupiter).

See, that's it, where i probb. go wrong with reading, - I'd think a "double placement" of significators in each other's 5th houses/places should be relevant in a question about love/relationship!
as in, both sides search mostly for the physical aspect of the connection they have lost, or main interest would be 5th houses things...
or even, it could point towards both think they lost love, but in real they lost a more shallow, nevertheless very powerful connection.
I found it significant specially as the Moon here is in domicile Cancer, so very strong...i thought the placement must mean something.
--- Is in general the use of houses/places to be taken more carefully? (it seems easier than reception for me as a beginner, so maybe too tempting..??.)


2) POF is usually associated with material gain (money, profit, fortune, etc.). Unless the chart is concerned with that, its usually meaningless.
Thanks for this, - i didn't know that! - So for love questions point of marriage would be more telling?
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Unread 01-06-2016, 05:14 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

Hello -

Quesited ruler on Querant Asc - he is very much on your mind. In turn, his own ruler in his turned 7th means he wants to be very much on other people's mind - yours included. His ruler has burst forth into your 1st house and has overtaken you.

So I look to Moon - which rules question of insecurity, uncertainty, fear and emotion - and Moon is in quesited's 4th house of endings - which means their is an ending to emotional relationship in this matter as asked, as well as passing square to querant co-ruler - Jupiter, which probably inkled you to ask something that you knew.


Moon at critical degree in 10th also indicates you feel this endiing will spill all of your emotion into the streets - and opposing closed pages Sun in your 4th would make you feel that way - that your core foundation is having light shined on it during an ending.

Point of Fortune in this case, shining on querant's 7th relationship potential and quesited's current need for recognition - will not end miserably for either.

Venus in 3rd of question trine ruler of 3rd "moving on", in separation of trine, bodes well for getting over the pluto-merc obsession of your querant ruler.

Getting it off your chest is better than storing it in.
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Unread 01-06-2016, 08:18 PM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

I am not sure about this, but to me it seems that Mercury is pretty upset on Jupiter, though it is pretty into him emotionally.
Sun is also in Jupiter's fall, there is this split between his male side and his rational side.
Although there is a possibility, the outcome of the relationship depends on whatever side rules you most. And since that rational side is aspecting Jupiter, I don't see this as being fruitful. On top of that, the Sun/Moon opposition with no reception adds to the outcome.

Mercury won't want Jupiter back. And if you may, I'd like to know if you replied to his 3 months expected text. It looks like you didn't reply just because you are not sure you really need this back.
Would also really appreciate if you can update the thread, for learning purposes.
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Last edited by heidy26; 01-06-2016 at 08:30 PM.
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  #11  
Unread 01-07-2016, 12:34 AM
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Re: does he still want to be in a relationship with me?

I am happy this was brought up again, as he just contacted me last night after not hearing from him since solstice. thank you Oleanna this has been a good learning experience.

to recap: he sent a message on solstice filling me in on his going-ons, and said he was thinking of me often, and that he was processing a lot of things but didn't have any words for it. it all was quite superficial considering that he had broken up with me by fading away, and had never actually discussed any of it. keeping in mind that i never begged, prodded, or confronted him, but let time pass for him to reach out to me as i knew he would.

so i said, though it was good to hear from him, not to bother if he was not going to come to me authentically and with an open heart. i could do without superficiality, as it only stings the wounds. this was on the eve of the 23rd.

i hadn't heard anything from him again until the eve of the 5th.
it took him that long to speak his truth, the reasons leading up to the break up, and why he faded away. overall, an e-mail filled with heavy remorse and confusion. while we were separated for a month (and still together) his ex, or his non-ex i guess, came to visit (which again, i was cool with, and happy for them), but she ultimately didn't want to share him any more, and through all of that he came to be truthful with himself and say that she was his primary all of this time, and that he couldn't lose his relationship with her over me. so, riding the happiness of being with her and spending time together that they hadn't spent in years, and me being across the border (though planning a visit) it was easier for him to stomach his emotions and feelings for me, and disregard our relationship. he wanted the perfect polyamorous triad with us all loving each other equally, but that perfect vision was not coming to fruition so something had to change.

it's a long story. but: yes, he does have deep feelings for me still, and he has not stopped loving or caring for me. he still thinks romantically of me. he still wants a relationship with me, but as friends, and not a partnership as we had been in, planning our lives together. he misses me greatly, and he is remorseful and ashamed for how he dealt with his confusion and emotions, and for not telling me the truth. he wants to heal together, but understands if i want to heal on my own.

my take: yes, i want him in my life, even as a friend. my love for him is deeper than expectation or future projections. however... do i trust him any more? no. do i trust that he won't vanish again because of 'her'? no. so the head/heart thing is real. i forgive him for his humanity, but i have not forgotten the pain that was caused, and that will take a lot of time to mend. what will our friendship look like even? given our love and sexual attraction for each other, would it ever work out as friendship anyways? i have my doubts.

for now, i will slowly slowly let him back in while being totally up front with how i'm feeling about it. i am in a pretty healthy emotional state right now, so i am ready to see what other emotions need to be dredged up so that i can heal fully from this rejection. i have a feeling that when he sees me again, which will be this coming spring, that he may be bowled over by his decisions to let go of our romantic relationship, as i know it was easier to 'let me go' when i had already been physically away for over a month.

will i take him back romantically? i highly doubt it.

i will update if anything further could help with your assessments. there was a lot of truth spoken by all of you, though interesting how you came to it in your own ways.

thank you so much for taking the time to read this chart, i have learned a lot.
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