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  #1  
Unread 12-27-2019, 08:56 PM
or1000 or1000 is offline
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My emotionality

Hello
I’ll admit I’m fragile at points in time. But I find it hard to understand how someone so tough can feel breakable when you take my life’s necessities away from me. I relate my emotional health to my home and financial life, and my ability to look after myself well. i have a chronic illness. in the past, the same family members I’ve been wronged by put with enough from, and frankly I can’t rely on them, have often been there, no not necessary to ‘look after’ me. But helped me out, made everyday life possible. I haven’t been raised in a stable family, with frankly very unhealthy family members that have contributed to my stressful home life through growing up with all could want and never needing anything, so now I have sibling that acts recklessly and believes he can fall back on everybody. including me... My parents (mother) is unstable in her mind. I am slowly becoming more financially independent where I won’t have to put up with this for much longer. But having an illness means i've had to stick around for longer than i have expected. i also find it hard to imagine a familiess life. It seems impossible but the same people that are hurt my personal growth are the ones who give me stability.

just a little talk, i suppose.
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Last edited by or1000; 12-28-2019 at 07:51 AM.
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  #2  
Unread 12-28-2019, 03:26 AM
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waybread waybread is offline
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Re: My emotionality

You've got an interesting chart. Your grand cross involving moon-Chiron plus Chiron conjunct moon as the tip of a Thor's Hammer configuration suggest a certain amount of hardship in life, due mainly to a lot of inner stress. But if you stay open to your feelings and don't try to shut them down, you can gain in wisdom and compassion for other people.

Then the orbs are a bit wide with Jupiter out-of-sign but you also have a kite formation, with Neptune at the apex. Intuition, creative visualization, spirituality are suggested.

Perhaps where you live there is a network of people who share your illness, or a non-profit society for outreach. You may find a support group to make you somewhat less dependent on dysfunctional family members.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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  #3  
Unread 12-30-2019, 12:02 PM
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Zora Zora is offline
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Re: My emotionality

Quote:
Originally Posted by or1000 View Post
I’ll admit I’m fragile at points in time.

Hello or1000,

I am quite sure- that what you call fragile is more about that you are a HSP born person with highsensitive senses perceiving from people and from outside a lot more information as others do.

Your neptune in your 4th house opposes your mercury in 10th cusp 11th house and neptune trines your AC on sensitive zero degree libra - yet between two signs as you were born. Double ruled by mercury and venus.


And it looks like you have been born "as called" for a difficult sibling situation (probably a loss) in your family. Pluto rules your 3rd house siblings and is in square with your moonnode in virgo in 12th house and in trine with your mercury. Moonnode is in trine with saturn in 8th house - bloodline ancestors and genetic inheritance). But saturn is in square with your neptune in your 4th house.

Do you know whether your mother had a miscarriage of a male child before your birth? You with your sensitive senses can subsconsciously feel with your neptune ? And what takes influence on you not knowing from where it comes ?

Mercury plays a double significant role in your chart - with a zero degree AC between virgo and libra double ruled by mercury and venus. And as well in your lifepath /MC /10th house on zero degree cancer between cancer and gemini - double ruled by moon and mercury.

Your scopio moon in 2nd house is a strong energy and focus on family matters - longing for to be a worthful part of it -what with chiron conj moon you probably most of times don't feel as true. And a scorpio moon in 2nd house under ruler venus has a tendency to make onself as a victim for the sake of family's harmony and peace and to take over the role as the black sheep or scapegoat in family - especially in conjunct with scorpio chiron.

2nd house is also selfdefending and about protection of own territory, setting boundaries and also house of skills and gifts you are born with. Venus as ruler of your 2nd house and your 9th house -faith and belief- inconjuncts your moon in 2nd house as ruler of 10th house very exact and makes it more difficult for you to defend your own territory and to shut your doors to find a personal rest for your own and alone.

Venus trines as well uranus strong placed as ruler of 5th house in 5th house. What is as well a gift and skill you are born with to get flashlightening inputs and sudden information from outside. What you can feel in your own body as well - as venus rules your body house 2nd.

But if you are not well grounded- you are always endangered to get overloaded from impressions and you and your body are also very sensitive to get over-electrified, physically sensitive about electro smog.

Quote:
Originally Posted by or1000 View Post
i have a chronic illness..
When - month/year did it start ?


Health is ruled by neptune in your chart - and is of very sensitive immunesystem due to neptune's trine on your AC and depends a lot on your personal emotions with neptune in 4th house - also on mother and your own feeling at home here. And also on earth in general.

Your neptune was squared in 2018 for a while foreward and backward by transiting uranus as your ruler of life energy, selfindepency, creativity and also your father and father experience in childhood - what all came up that time as a subject.




.

Last edited by Zora; 12-30-2019 at 12:08 PM.
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  #4  
Unread 12-30-2019, 01:06 PM
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Zora Zora is offline
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Re: My emotionality

Your 4th house – IC- income from previous life is on zero degree capricorn – double ruled by jupiter and saturn. Jupiter is in your health house 6th and in square with your mars as ruler of your 8th house genetic inheritance and predisposition for health issues. From which something can be activated during and with transits.

But 8th house is also all subconciously stored memory of your own experiences – also those of your ancestors and family members. With aries in 8th house mostly connected to those in your family - who had to fight a lot to feel theirselves accepted in family and to fight for their own beliefs - they preferred and liked to take faith in. From whom you might have taken over the the spirit sense of limitless fighting- but taken over in your own body and health and immunesystem with mars inconjuncting your neptune in 4th house - and more from your mothers side.

Your mercury is actually still squared by transiting uranus to support you with self-liberation energy and to get more independent and creative. With transiting uranus sextiling your pluto - uranus wakes up again a strong self-regeneration energy in you -- you are already born with - with mercury trine pluto. A strong energy to overcome all. And a very strong mental power for visualizing your goals you have and wish to come true - you can use for a focus on pictures of future situations - for the most positive or the contrary.

Pluto in 3rd is also a very deep detective sense, to find out things and to go deep to the roots of an issue- and is able to receive like coming "out of the blue" helping informations from outside. Like going into internet - having a question - and get by error on a side you didn't choose - but find your question answered therein.

Pluto in 3rd ist also the called eidetic memory - never forgetting anything and able to store a lot of tiny details of subjects. And is also a strong energy for creating things- like a self-fullfilling prophecy.

Transiting jupiter has already got the sparkflame-energy on - on your AC/DC axis and your IC/MC axis - for a re-birthing by entering zero degree capricorn and your 4th house - the deepest point and basement of your chart. Has woken up your mercury as ruler of your 12th house - prenatal experience and your saturn as ruler of IC in 8th house - to help you to get more grounded again and will continue with your moon, your chiron and your uranus next year mid of january to support your self-liberation as well.


.
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  #5  
Unread 12-30-2019, 01:45 PM
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Re: My emotionality

Quote:
Originally Posted by or1000 View Post
Hello
I’ll admit I’m fragile at points in time. But I find it hard to understand how someone so tough can feel breakable when you take my life’s necessities away from me. I relate my emotional health to my home and financial life, and my ability to look after myself well. i have a chronic illness. in the past, the same family members I’ve been wronged by put with enough from, and frankly I can’t rely on them, have often been there, no not necessary to ‘look after’ me. But helped me out, made everyday life possible. I haven’t been raised in a stable family, with frankly very unhealthy family members that have contributed to my stressful home life through growing up with all could want and never needing anything, so now I have sibling that acts recklessly and believes he can fall back on everybody. including me... My parents (mother) is unstable in her mind. I am slowly becoming more financially independent where I won’t have to put up with this for much longer. But having an illness means i've had to stick around for longer than i have expected. i also find it hard to imagine a familiess life. It seems impossible but the same people that are hurt my personal growth are the ones who give me stability.

just a little talk, i suppose.

One thing that leaps out at me is your cusp Virgo-Libra ASC and cusp Cancer-Gemini MC and Sag-Capricorn IC. Many people have one cusp of the cross close to the next sign but not as many have both the MC this close sign cusps. It feels confusing and destabilizing.

Is Venus or Mercury ruler of your chart? Is Mercury or Moon ruler of MC? South Node of Moon is Pisces - you come from - possibly - confusion about who you are in the past life. Jupiter traditionally rules the SN and it is almost in Aries, 7th cusp. I'm guessing that you tended to in a subservient relationship that created the past life wound. Could also indicate you had an illness being that it is Pisces and still in 6th.

You have a grand square, so that can also be pretty tough - Moon/Chiron - Mercury - Uranus - Saturn. You need to change structurally so that you are stronger and to do that you need to be analyzing your thought processes. Moon in 2nd house, Scorpio - you are evolving your self-concept - and need to do some deep inner work in that process. You also have that grand trine going - Pluto-Mercury-Jupiter. Mercury AGAIN - the common denominator in the grand square and grand trine.

It's possible that you have a Virgo rising. Libra, if it isn't happy in its relationships, it will tend to want to control them. You need different feedback from them than they are giving. It's either that - control - or buckle and obsess about what to do. If you are doing Virgo instead, you could be spending more time wanting to please and make it work by taking their BS lying down. You could be doing both. Libra is far more sensitive than it lets on. It can come off being really tough if it is in controlling others mode. But it only does that because it's so sensitive to how people relate to them.

If it were me, I'd probably focus on positive Virgo - analyzing for understanding. Mercury is so big in your chart, that I think this would be the most positive thing to do. Your Cancer Sun can help with feeling compassion for yourself and others. What conclusions about yourself are either wrong or negative? (Pluto in Sag)

Chronic illness = Saturn. Your Saturn in 8th house Taurus isn't so comfortable. Taurus would rather things be simple and pleasant but 8th house is messy with unconscious emotional stuff. You do need to embrace your emotions if you are trying to control them or keep the stiff upper lip. It's time to look at the thoughts and emotions that make you sick. Start with yourself and your family to truly become aware. Journaling is great for this. North node in Virgo - analyze to understand. Venus in Gemini, 9th - search the truth and grow. The mind needs to understand that all emotions have a place and right in our lives. All emotions have positivity - even anger, sadness, and fear. You have a right to them. Embrace what is within you and love yourself.

Think. Understand. Have compassion. Forgive. Let go. Get well. Just my two sense. I wish you health and happiness in 2020.
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  #6  
Unread 12-31-2019, 08:14 PM
or1000 or1000 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waybread View Post
You've got an interesting chart. Your grand cross involving moon-Chiron plus Chiron conjunct moon as the tip of a Thor's Hammer configuration suggest a certain amount of hardship in life, due mainly to a lot of inner stress. But if you stay open to your feelings and don't try to shut them down, you can gain in wisdom and compassion for other people.

Then the orbs are a bit wide with Jupiter out-of-sign but you also have a kite formation, with Neptune at the apex. Intuition, creative visualization, spirituality are suggested.

Perhaps where you live there is a network of people who share your illness, or a non-profit society for outreach. You may find a support group to make you somewhat less dependent on dysfunctional family members.
Thanks a lot. I get where you’re coming from with this. I have looked at mars as being an apex point of Thor’s hammer But not studied further. I suppose then the theory is that the planets’ stress on each point are released through mars??

Last edited by or1000; 12-31-2019 at 08:19 PM.
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  #7  
Unread 01-01-2020, 04:20 AM
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waybread waybread is offline
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Re: My emotionality

Ideally, released. Hopefully the person has a constructive outlet.

This article may be of interest. https://aliceportman.com/thors-hammer/
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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  #8  
Unread 01-02-2020, 12:46 AM
or1000 or1000 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zora View Post
Hello or1000,

I am quite sure- that what you call fragile is more about that you are a HSP born person with highsensitive senses perceiving from people and from outside a lot more information as others do.

Your neptune in your 4th house opposes your mercury in 10th cusp 11th house and neptune trines your AC on sensitive zero degree libra - yet between two signs as you were born. Double ruled by mercury and venus.


And it looks like you have been born "as called" for a difficult sibling situation (probably a loss) in your family. Pluto rules your 3rd house siblings and is in square with your moonnode in virgo in 12th house and in trine with your mercury. Moonnode is in trine with saturn in 8th house - bloodline ancestors and genetic inheritance). But saturn is in square with your neptune in your 4th house.

Do you know whether your mother had a miscarriage of a male child before your birth? You with your sensitive senses can subsconsciously feel with your neptune ? And what takes influence on you not knowing from where it comes ?

Mercury plays a double significant role in your chart - with a zero degree AC between virgo and libra double ruled by mercury and venus. And as well in your lifepath /MC /10th house on zero degree cancer between cancer and gemini - double ruled by moon and mercury.

Your scopio moon in 2nd house is a strong energy and focus on family matters - longing for to be a worthful part of it -what with chiron conj moon you probably most of times don't feel as true. And a scorpio moon in 2nd house under ruler venus has a tendency to make onself as a victim for the sake of family's harmony and peace and to take over the role as the black sheep or scapegoat in family - especially in conjunct with scorpio chiron.

2nd house is also selfdefending and about protection of own territory, setting boundaries and also house of skills and gifts you are born with. Venus as ruler of your 2nd house and your 9th house -faith and belief- inconjuncts your moon in 2nd house as ruler of 10th house very exact and makes it more difficult for you to defend your own territory and to shut your doors to find a personal rest for your own and alone.

Venus trines as well uranus strong placed as ruler of 5th house in 5th house. What is as well a gift and skill you are born with to get flashlightening inputs and sudden information from outside. What you can feel in your own body as well - as venus rules your body house 2nd.

But if you are not well grounded- you are always endangered to get overloaded from impressions and you and your body are also very sensitive to get over-electrified, physically sensitive about electro smog.


When - month/year did it start ?


Health is ruled by neptune in your chart - and is of very sensitive immunesystem due to neptune's trine on your AC and depends a lot on your personal emotions with neptune in 4th house - also on mother and your own feeling at home here. And also on earth in general.

Your neptune was squared in 2018 for a while foreward and backward by transiting uranus as your ruler of life energy, selfindepency, creativity and also your father and father experience in childhood - what all came up that time as a subject.




.
‘Do you know whether your mother had a miscarriage of a male child before your birth? You with your sensitive senses can subsconsciously feel with your neptune ?’ I wouldn’t know for sure but i get where you are coming from with this. Makes sense in its neptuniun way.
‘and makes it more difficult for you to defend your own territory and to shut your doors to find a personal rest for your own and alone.‘ I would say this is well articulated. Yes. Defending territory... etc.
‘flashlightening inputs and sudden information from outside.‘ could you possibly explain this more. As, I do experience a lot of anxiety connected to this input. I feel very connected psychically to ‘outside’ at all times. My body seems very static and ungrounded.
‘ well grounded- you are always endangered to get overloaded from impressions and you and your body are also v‘ you see with this, is a difficult part. Grounding myself. Very tricky. I’m constantly feeling this stimulation, and it can seem impossible to STAY grounded. I’m yet to experience this feeling anywhere.
‘sensitive immunesystem due to neptune's trine on your AC‘ again, I believe this is very well put. You see I’ve been working recently on defending these boundaries of mine, and this makes a lot of sense in my urgency to do so. It’s very important to my health. The chronic illness had been ongoing but worsened over last few yrs.
You know I’d appreciate what you think of the 6th house ruler quincunx midheaven. You’d say this would have a great impact on my health?

Last edited by or1000; 01-02-2020 at 12:52 AM.
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  #9  
Unread 01-02-2020, 02:19 PM
or1000 or1000 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waybread View Post
Ideally, released. Hopefully the person has a constructive outlet.

This article may be of interest. https://aliceportman.com/thors-hammer/
What would you say this being possible public disgrace. With Gemini mars being very dual natured this coooould be lethal in my eyes sitting at the top of the chart in this configuration

Last edited by or1000; 01-02-2020 at 02:21 PM.
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  #10  
Unread 01-03-2020, 05:06 AM
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waybread waybread is offline
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Re: My emotionality

I don't think it's lethal. Now that you know more about your chart interpretation, you can make choices about how to handle yourself.
__________________
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. Jack Layton, "Letter to Canadians"

I thought we went along paths--but it seems there are no paths. The going itself is the path.
C.S. Lewis, Perelandra.

Life is not about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. Message on a refrigerator magnet.
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  #11  
Unread 01-03-2020, 04:05 PM
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Originally Posted by waybread View Post
I don't think it's lethal. Now that you know more about your chart interpretation, you can make choices about how to handle yourself.
You’re right
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