Why cant I ever attract Love

O

ocho

Well-known member
For as long as I can remember females in my age group never seem to approach me no matter what. They always STARE at me very indirectly and pretend that I don't exist. I never ever had a girl come to me and tell me anything whatsoever or that she was interested in me .Literally . I've had male accomplices tell me stories of how women approach them at the gym/school/bar and they are direct about how they feel about them and they get lucky. Maybe its because I'm living on a very bad Astrocartography Line? I've never had a single love relationship in my life and I'm 22. I want to know what is it in my chart that makes me Unapproachable and Intimidating. I know I'm not ugly because a lot of older woman tell me that I'm handsome and sexy. I just seem to have Very bad luck in attracting females that are direct. I never approach females because I feel that I will leave myself open for rejection and me approaching them is giving them my approval and they will feed of that. I have to much Pride for that. I just feel like I hate everyone. All the guys say " don't chase or worry about the girls they will come to you" 4,5,6,7 years later I'm still waiting. I've been strong for so long dealing with this extreme Loneliness but now I just feel like killing everyone I cant take it anymore. I just don't understand how a woman can be shy. They have nothing to loose and can get anything they want.
 

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jkxx74

jkxx74

Premium Member
Hi ocho,

you have a configuration in your chart that I've been looking at closely as of late - that is your Saturn-Chiron opposition with Chiron falling in your 5th house and that being T-square Mercury and Venus in H2. What this roughly means is that whenever your Venus reaches out to another person it immediately triggers the Saturn-Chiron opposition (which also includes Mars, more on that in a bit) so that you feel like you are getting a negative response and have to start defending yourself by "doing" something about it (Mars with Chiron opposite Saturn) with the end result being that you tell the other person that they are attacking you and you are responding to the attack. If it is a first impression situation this will tend to create problems as the other person misinterprets your response and then things can spiral out of control from there.

Mars with Chiron is always defensive and double so when it opposes Saturn so keep a close eye on what you feel you "have to" do when you are triggered by another person. Do you really have to react in this way? Can you just remain neutral? Just another option there.

This particular configuration is best helped by having the other person's Moon (or Sun but Moon is better) fall on your Saturn - the Moon generally likes Saturn and will tolerate Chiron so long as it knows Saturn is on the other end so look for people with the Moon around 25-27 Pisces to start with. As a bonus it will square your Venus so you'll get some incentive to keep approaching that person. If other aspects are favorable something can develop.

Another troublesome placement here is Pluto in the 7th opposite the Ascendant - you put out the vibe that you will be very intense in relationship and this is picked up immediately by other people. Unless that's something they want they can be quite scared by your Pluto so it would help if they have planets making soft aspects to your Pluto. (The ruler of the sign your Venus is placed in, Mercury, is closely square Saturn so you will mentally assume you are getting rejected first before anything happens. Let it play out before making any conclusions.)

There are some other placements in your chart but these are the ones I'll personally pick as the ones causing trouble for you. You do actually have plenty of positive ones as well and in "other" houses so you can do quite well once you find the right person.
 
Culpeper

Culpeper

Premium Member
It is the square from Saturn to Venus in the natal chart. It is a night chart and Saturn is the chief malefic. There is not enough data given with the chart to use traditional timing methods with it. I cannot determine the ruler of the year. Even Mars in the fifth house might help you with this issue if we knew when it was active. Otherwise you can look for transits to Venus or Mars in the natal chart.
 
Claire19

Claire19

Well-known member
We cant see how you look so really all comments are speculation. I do pick up that you are too passive and really need to be more pro active in attracting women. Dont wait for them to come to you. Hot gym jocks may get approached and women who are drinking in bars but my bet is that you dont frequent these locations. Your Mars in Virgo is rather fussy and proper and opposite Pisces in the 11th of group situations means that you either are withdrawn and introverted and not really that social.
 
O

ocho

Well-known member
jkxx74 said:
Hi ocho,

you have a configuration in your chart that I've been looking at closely as of late - that is your Saturn-Chiron opposition with Chiron falling in your 5th house and that being T-square Mercury and Venus in H2. What this roughly means is that whenever your Venus reaches out to another person it immediately triggers the Saturn-Chiron opposition (which also includes Mars, more on that in a bit) so that you feel like you are getting a negative response and have to start defending yourself by "doing" something about it (Mars with Chiron opposite Saturn) with the end result being that you tell the other person that they are attacking you and you are responding to the attack. If it is a first impression situation this will tend to create problems as the other person misinterprets your response and then things can spiral out of control from there.

Mars with Chiron is always defensive and double so when it opposes Saturn so keep a close eye on what you feel you "have to" do when you are triggered by another person. Do you really have to react in this way? Can you just remain neutral? Just another option there.

This particular configuration is best helped by having the other person's Moon (or Sun but Moon is better) fall on your Saturn - the Moon generally likes Saturn and will tolerate Chiron so long as it knows Saturn is on the other end so look for people with the Moon around 25-27 Pisces to start with. As a bonus it will square your Venus so you'll get some incentive to keep approaching that person. If other aspects are favorable something can develop.

Another troublesome placement here is Pluto in the 7th opposite the Ascendant - you put out the vibe that you will be very intense in relationship and this is picked up immediately by other people. Unless that's something they want they can be quite scared by your Pluto so it would help if they have planets making soft aspects to your Pluto. (The ruler of the sign your Venus is placed in, Mercury, is closely square Saturn so you will mentally assume you are getting rejected first before anything happens. Let it play out before making any conclusions.)

There are some other placements in your chart but these are the ones I'll personally pick as the ones causing trouble for you. You do actually have plenty of positive ones as well and in "other" houses so you can do quite well once you find the right person.
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Thank you so much for you insight I feel that you went out of your way to write such a long analysis, I am currently rereading it to give you a better response in the future as I am comparing what you said to my experiences.
Would you be able to tell me what my other malefics are and also what "Good" aspects that I have in relating to this topic that I find hard to even believe exists in my chart pleas
 
O

ocho

Well-known member
Claire19 said:
We cant see how you look so really all comments are speculation. I do pick up that you are too passive and really need to be more pro active in attracting women. Dont wait for them to come to you. Hot gym jocks may get approached and women who are drinking in bars but my bet is that you dont frequent these locations. Your Mars in Virgo is rather fussy and proper and opposite Pisces in the 11th of group situations means that you either are withdrawn and introverted and not really that social.
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I'm at the gym almost everyday! I would agree that I am passive in going after woman but I Have a lot of confidence. I don't resonate with mars in virgo at all. But I do feel that if it was in Leo I wouldn't have all this mess in my life.. Its so **** sad.. why did it have to be me
 
C

c721

Member
You're a Cancer like me. I read some info somewhere that stated for the next 28-32 years, our love lives will be easier and we won't feel Saturn hammering away at or restricting our hearts anymore... that we'll have real opportunities to find true love... thank goodness! I've had several relationships but all were pretty much HELL (that might even be an understatement). Have you ever thought that being single might actually be a BLESSING? Haha! Jk... I believe Venus is in Cancer right now until August 26th so you'd better get out there and be open to giving and receiving. Our love lives seem to get REAL NICE in October through the end of the year and every first quarter of the new year. I know this for a fact because I experience high levels of love and attraction those times of the year. There is a very high possibility of most Cancers meeting their life partner between 2017-2018. Jupiter will be transiting our 5th house -- extra fun and romance! It won't work for you if you "want to kill everyone" and give up... you WILL be alone if you keep that up. Astrology is astrology but you also have free will and the power to make things happen.
 
UraSatVen1029

UraSatVen1029

Well-known member
ocho said:
I'm at the gym almost everyday! I would agree that I am passive in going after woman but I Have a lot of confidence. I don't resonate with mars in virgo at all. But I do feel that if it was in Leo I wouldn't have all this mess in my life.. Its so **** sad.. why did it have to be me
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In sidereal/Vedic, I think your Mars would be in Leo. It's a different chart system but I find that Vedic also resonates with me. Like you, I have Mars in Virgo, and in Leo for Vedic. I resonate with both. My energy as a virgo, I don't really approach people as an instinct. I'm shy, definitely, but then I warm up once I get comfortable. But in my pursuing my love interests, I don't do the first move because of fear of rejection, mostly. So I end up doing nothing, watching, and pray to the LORD that this person would come and flirt my asss off.

But as for Leo, I LOVE to perform on stage. Combine that my nervous energy though (virgo) I get stage fright. But in the end, I just love to perform, show off, give love and warmth to an audience. So there's that. I also love to dance.

Just my two cents about your Mars.
 
O

ocho

Well-known member
ablindplacebo said:
I have moon sq venus too, and I haven't been in a relationship yet (im 21)
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I just find it so **** sad...
Moon square Venus, Venus square Saturn... what's the benefits of having these ? what's the point . I know what your going through.. I just feel like my love life is being wasted
 
O

ocho

Well-known member
UraSatVen1029 said:
In sidereal/Vedic, I think your Mars would be in Leo. It's a different chart system but I find that Vedic also resonates with me. Like you, I have Mars in Virgo, and in Leo for Vedic. I resonate with both. My energy as a virgo, I don't really approach people as an instinct. I'm shy, definitely, but then I warm up once I get comfortable. But in my pursuing my love interests, I don't do the first move because of fear of rejection, mostly. So I end up doing nothing, watching, and pray to the LORD that this person would come and flirt my asss off.

But as for Leo, I LOVE to perform on stage. Combine that my nervous energy though (virgo) I get stage fright. But in the end, I just love to perform, show off, give love and warmth to an audience. So there's that. I also love to dance.

Just my two cents about your Mars.
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I noticed that aswell that in my sidereal chart my mars is in Leo in the 5h, which would make more sense for how I feel. I have way to much pride to chase after a girl. I would like her to meet me half way.. I really like straight forward outgoing girls that aren't shy but also have to that Scorpion look.
 
UraSatVen1029

UraSatVen1029

Well-known member
ocho said:
I just find it so **** sad...
Moon square Venus, Venus square Saturn... what's the benefits of having these ? what's the point . I know what your going through.. I just feel like my love life is being wasted
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I have the opposition Venus-Saturn aspect, plus load it with Venus neptune and Venus uranus squares. The only thing thats mellowing all of those hard aspects is my Sun Venus conjunction but still, it is rather sad. XD

With Venus-Saturn, one may have depth and seriousness in approach to love and aesthetics, perhaps. With the harder aspects, our self-worth becomes a little weaker, making us feel insecure. Well, that's how I experienced it. Plus, I have saturn as my chart ruler, with that Venus-saturn aspect, I really CAN'T attract love interests that easily. I come off aloof or too serious, and maybe a little frigid and boring. It doesn't help that this is one of the aspects that is fueling my pessimism and insecurity in my self-worth/esteem.

But what I do like about this is that it does add depth with how you love. I won't take a love too superficial, or one that does not change me for the better. I guess its also because of my Scorpio venus, but yeah. Plus I love old things (Saturn likes these), I like the old school kind of love, the romance back in the 70's, so on and so forth.

The squares, I read from somewhere, creates tension, but it does instill growth and improvement if you exert effort into it. I try to be optimistic about it, despite the number of squares I have in my chart (I have a lot) so maybe this can instill growth in you. It's not so bad... really. It shouldn't be so depressing.
 
A

ablindplacebo

Active member
ocho said:
I just find it so **** sad...
Moon square Venus, Venus square Saturn... what's the benefits of having these ? what's the point . I know what your going through.. I just feel like my love life is being wasted
Click to expand...

It isn't a death sentence. I have a badly afflicted moon (moon opp saturn, moon square venus, venus inconjunct nep) makes me highly delusional/illusion when it comes to my emotions and relationships.

However, my sun is in 10th and venus in 11th. basically I feel like if im not in a relationship im not enough, it encourages self growth. for the past few months I've been thinking about it less and less and just focusing on school/career to feel whole. You have to see the big picture!

Anything that saturn touches you have to work with it, for ex. moon opp saturn means I have to always put effort to let my guard down and be vulnerable to show emotions. With you venus square saturn it could mean letting yourself able to give love and be loved.
 
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