How Do I Attract People?

ReincarnatedRainbow

ReincarnatedRainbow

Well-known member
I am awkward when dealing with others and people don't seem to like me much. I don't know if I seem dull or annoying or abrasive to others, just that the only friends I seem to have are the ones I made when I was in the seventh grade, and even then I'm not close to them in the least.

I also think that maybe people feel that they don't get what they signed up for when they first meet me; I act very quiet, shy, and just a tad sardonic when I'm around new people, but then as soon as I start to relax around them, I become loud and uh...Socially inappropriate? What I mean is that people discover my sense of humor is rather hit or miss, I am what mainstream would call a "hippie" or a "zealot" and I talk too much.

But I still know a lot of people who have the same flaws as me, and yet they're surrounded by friends. What gives?

How I do I become more popular with people? And, although it's embarrassing and a bit silly, how do I attract men?
 

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Annette1029

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you have ACS in cancer moon in 4th house strongly squared by jupiter/uranus/neptune/AC,are you extremely sensitive with new people/invironment?I think if you didn't show people your real character at first,like you mentioned"sense of humor,loud,hippie"(sounds like jup/uranus/nep are in you 7th house to me),either these qualities will be showed in poeple who u attracted n fight against you,or you show it strongly in a close relationship/friendship.And i think you venus conjunct MC,makes you want to be popular,liked by poeple/friends,and do you feel hard to be yourself in a close relationship(friend,love)?I think neptune do this to me,it's on my AC,and in your case it's conjunct to your DC.
Venus in 9th house and it rules your 11th house,you should feel good to talk about life plan,travel,faith or have a really deep discussion with people.
 
ReincarnatedRainbow

ReincarnatedRainbow

Well-known member
sandstone said:
hi r-r

if this rounded off time of 12pm is close, you are experiencing the transit of saturn squaring onto your ascendant and in opposition to your mercury. this will make you seem like dullsville to folks and everything you say will come out like a plod, lol.. well that is the quick read, but it just addresses this passing phase of saturn squaring onto your ascendant, mercury and neptune in the 7th as well...

not everyone is cut out to be a chick magnet, but you are still very young! you haven't lived long enough to know how horny guys are and how they might not be so interested in you as getting laid.. do yourself a favour and go slowly into the world of relationships.. there really is no hurry!

i think you are being too hard on yourself as well in what you have to say here.. the fact is aries likes to charge ahead and pronounce itself to the world regardless of what the world thinks, which is sometimes a very good quality to have.. i think what is going on is you are probably a lot more into the moon in scorpio then your sun in aries which is nicely conjunct venus, balanced by a conjunction to saturn as well.. perhaps it is saturn here that makes you feel older and more dull then what might really be the case.. the moon is sort of being hit by this transit of saturn as well, although it is moving away and will be back towards the end of the year which is a long time from now in some respects..

mars the ruler of those planets in aries is in the 3rd house and retrograde.. this is interesting as the 3rd is the house of friends, along with the 11th and to a certain extent the 7th too - all air type houses.. having mars retro here and with the present transit of mars retro which happened to start right around 22 or 23 virgo back in late january is also playing into your stronger focus on friendships which no doubt are quite important to you... you perhaps come across as more upfront and brash with you friends but i would imagine that is also why they like you.. mars is conjunct the north node and trine to neptune in the 7th.

i guess i mostly see your concern here as temporary with the saturn and mars transit as having some bearing... remember mercury which is undergoing this transit is ruler of your 3rd house and mars too.. perhaps one or 2 events from the past 1/2 has motivated you to ask this?

i think the friends will come, especially when mars turns direct in another month or so and saturn moves away from your ascendant which is later in the year.. i think it is mostly a temporary thing and i wouldn't be hard on yourself... stay positive and you will find people who are like minded who will be attracted to you - male and female.. cheers james
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Don't assume it's rounded off, James.

And by the way, not all guys are horny bastards. I know a guy who's not, but he's in love with this goody two shoes Libra girl.

How do I not appear dull in front of others? Should I focus on anything? Try to put out a certain energy?
 
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ReincarnatedRainbow

ReincarnatedRainbow

Well-known member
Annette1029 said:
you have ACS in cancer moon in 4th house strongly squared by jupiter/uranus/neptune/AC,are you extremely sensitive with new people/invironment?I think if you didn't show people your real character at first,like you mentioned"sense of humor,loud,hippie"(sounds like jup/uranus/nep are in you 7th house to me),either these qualities will be showed in poeple who u attracted n fight against you,or you show it strongly in a close relationship/friendship.And i think you venus conjunct MC,makes you want to be popular,liked by poeple/friends,and do you feel hard to be yourself in a close relationship(friend,love)?I think neptune do this to me,it's on my AC,and in your case it's conjunct to your DC.
Venus in 9th house and it rules your 11th house,you should feel good to talk about life plan,travel,faith or have a really deep discussion with people.
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Nobody is interested in that stuff like I am, though.
 
G

gen6k

Well-known member
ReincarnatedRainbow said:
Nobody is interested in that stuff like I am, though.
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You should move to a different location with people that are in a similar wavelength. Maybe someone can calculate when you would have an opportunity to do that "auto-affectually". Have you hit your first Uranus square Uranus? Or possibly Uranus - Venus/ Uranus - Mercury transits. For people to come in.

I also get what you mean by other peoples reponses maybe? Unless it is a joke, your text seems to have erratic timing/tone/disillusioned intention. Or maybe thats because all of the pisces in the sky currently.
 
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Annette1029

Well-known member
ReincarnatedRainbow said:
Nobody is interested in that stuff like I am, though.
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I totally feel u!But still i meet people who understand me occasionally.It's interesting i meet most of them through internet.maybe it's my venus uranus aspect.You will find out ur pattern.And a friend told me i am like her "priest",when she talks to me,she feels like confessinglol,cuz not many people understand her,even i don't response,she feel her ideas are received.And that kinda conversation is what i am looking for,feel strongly connected.I think that's due to my Nep conjunct to AC.
And try to be more patient when you think other people don't get you,try to share your idea in a way they understand.I still can't do this well,but when i try,things get better.
 
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luna7

luna7

Well-known member
[FONT=&quot]There are lots of factors in your chart that, I think, could be the reason you get mixed feedback from your friends. [/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]First of all the Cancer asc, ruled by the Moon conjunct chiron in scorpio in the 4th: the Cancer asc could mask up in a variety of ways – the nurturer, the smotherer, overly sensitive…but because it is ruled by such a deep Moon…I suspect you might initially present as a bit closed off, trying to stay invisible (like the crab) which is a way of protecting the intensity and depth of feeling that go with your moon sign/placement. This moon squares the Uranus in Aq in the 7th, so even tho you may attract and give off “rather steady” vibes (Cap desc) when you go that step further toward friendship, the Uranus in Aq would kick in pretty quickly and you might become quite zany & “outside the tribe” so to speak.. Your Sun in Aries suggests that you are someone who is courageous and brave, loyal. Sun conjunct Venus means relationships are a helpful way for you to know yourself better, but being in Aries means they might entail some “intimacy struggles” – that’s ok, a little bit of arguing (as long as you try to stay respectful of the other’s opinion) clears the air, and keeps it real (which the Moon in scorpio likes). The tricky part is being true to these different parts of yourself, because they are all valid. At this stage, I’d work hard to accept the depth of feeling and sensitivity that are represented by your moon – looking after our moon is what keeps us feeling balanced and safe. When you feel really strong & secure within yourself, someone decent will come along. It’s like a magnet.[/FONT]
 
ReincarnatedRainbow

ReincarnatedRainbow

Well-known member
luna7 said:
[FONT=&quot]First of all the Cancer asc, ruled by the Moon conjunct chiron in scorpio in the 4th: the Cancer asc could mask up in a variety of ways – the nurturer, the smotherer, overly sensitive…but because it is ruled by such a deep Moon…I suspect you might initially present as a bit closed off, trying to stay invisible (like the crab) which is a way of protecting the intensity and depth of feeling that go with your moon sign/placement.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]I do have a habit of smothering my friends, to the point where they'll either snap at me to go away or start to ignore me for a couple days. I try to remain detached around my friends, because it seems that if I don't pretend to be indifferent, they lose interest. Which in a way, I understand. Most of my friends are air signs. Still, I wind up feeling very lonely when I try to play it cool, despite them keeping me company.[/FONT]

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luna7 said:
This moon squares the Uranus in Aq in the 7th, so even tho you may attract and give off “rather steady” vibes (Cap desc) when you go that step further toward friendship, the Uranus in Aq would kick in pretty quickly and you might become quite zany & “outside the tribe” so to speak..
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[FONT=&quot]That is true. I act very "normal" and quiet around people. But once I start getting comfortable I get weird, and I can't seem to stop. Once, I was with a friend whom I felt very close to. We were in science class when she wrote a -rather angry- poem and requested me to read it. The very last verse was "How do I taste now?". I knew the verse was metaphorical, but I had already licked her face from top to bottom and reported the exact taste of her skin before I even thought about it. [/FONT]

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luna7 said:
Your Sun in Aries suggests that you are someone who is courageous and brave, loyal.
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That's correct. But my loyalty is always thrown back in my face. I have a friend who gossiped about me to her friend while I was three feet behind her. And she knew I was. And when I tried to stay away from her, she called me stupid and overly sensitive, even though her gossiping caused that other girl to start shouting at me and threatening to kill me in the school halls. Also, all our mutual friends ignored me, choosing to stay with her. I hate to sound like I'm whining, but I feel my friendships are all take, take, take. I get nothing, though. I still feel betrayed, alone, and unfufilled at the end of the day.

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luna7 said:
At this stage, I’d work hard to accept the depth of feeling and sensitivity that are represented by your moon – looking after our moon is what keeps us feeling balanced and safe.
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I've accepted that I am a senstive person, is that what you mean?
 
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luna7

luna7

Well-known member
[FONT=&quot]The canc asc, the scorpio Moon give lots of sensitivity - someone likened the Water signs to a submarine, skimming along the bottom of the ocean picking up on all the undercurrents. It's a wonderful trait for deeply connecting with people, but it can leave you feeling alone & very vulnerable until you find like-minded types. People are coming from all different perspectives, and finding someone we gel with can take a lot of time. Unfortunately, if the Moon in Scorpio doesnt connect it sometimes comes across as moodiness....I'm guessing it's more frustration that people "dont get them!" The Sun/Venus conjunction in Aries also wants to relate, but will attract what Steven Forrest calls "petty tyrants", people you have to do battle with so that you learn about how brave you really can be. I'm not surprised your friends are airy types (given that Aquarius lies in the 7th house). While these different facets of yourself are being tested and while you are still trying to recognise which part feels most like you in a given situation, perhaps the best strategy is to be more outgoing & cheeky when you socialise, and then escape into your moon when you get home. Have you got a space where you can journal, dance in the dark, burn incense...something that makes you feel more centred. I know this might sound odd, but I'm wondering whether you can find someone you can be useful to? Help? A sick or older person? A cause? Sometimes people in lesser situations have a genuine appreciation for "real and meaningful contact" - which, I think, you are both capable of and craving. PS dont put yourself at any risk.....obviously :eek:
[/FONT]
 
ReincarnatedRainbow

ReincarnatedRainbow

Well-known member
luna7 said:
[FONT=&quot]The canc asc, the scorpio Moon give lots of sensitivity - someone likened the Water signs to a submarine, skimming along the bottom of the ocean picking up on all the undercurrents. It's a wonderful trait for deeply connecting with people, but it can leave you feeling alone & very vulnerable until you find like-minded types. People are coming from all different perspectives, and finding someone we gel with can take a lot of time. Unfortunately, if the Moon in Scorpio doesnt connect it sometimes comes across as moodiness....I'm guessing it's more frustration that people "dont get them!" The Sun/Venus conjunction in Aries also wants to relate, but will attract what Steven Forrest calls "petty tyrants", people you have to do battle with so that you learn about how brave you really can be. I'm not surprised your friends are airy types (given that Aquarius lies in the 7th house). While these different facets of yourself are being tested and while you are still trying to recognise which part feels most like you in a given situation, perhaps the best strategy is to be more outgoing & cheeky when you socialise, and then escape into your moon when you get home. Have you got a space where you can journal, dance in the dark, burn incense...something that makes you feel more centred. I know this might sound odd, but I'm wondering whether you can find someone you can be useful to? Help? A sick or older person? A cause? Sometimes people in lesser situations have a genuine appreciation for "real and meaningful contact" - which, I think, you are both capable of and craving. PS dont put yourself at any risk.....obviously :eek:[/FONT]
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Ah, well, I'd love to help. People usually think I'm joking when I say this, but I genuinely feel the most happy when I'm giving money to strangers who need it, brightening someone's day with a compliment, or giving advice to those who are in need of it (especially if they're depressed and need the reassurance). But those moments don't come enough to me, and I've actually gained a reputation for being a snob, despite my "random" acts of kindness, because apparently I glare at everyone and refuse t socialize. I don't agree with that, but if that's what the public sees, then maybe there's some truth.

As for a place to be "centered"...No..Haha, I really have no where to escape. Maybe that's why my number fantasy for the past two years now has been to live alone? I have this simple little dream of mine to live in apartment or white condo, like my grandmother used to have when I was five and she was thirty :joyful:

I don't really like air personalities. They make me feel uneasy (are they talking behind my back? kind of feeling) and definitely unappreciated. I only have earth and air friends, and although earth likes to stab me in the back frequently, they make me feel a lot better than my air friends...Then again, less air friends have betrayed me than earth friends (that I can prove), so maybe my uneasiness is a bit unfair.
 
JUPITERASC

JUPITERASC

Well-known member
StillOne said:
Hmmm, have you researched your Quincunx aspects? :innocent:
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ReincarnatedRainbow said:
Ah, I don't know! I still haven't gotten the total hang of aspects yet!
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Inconjunct (literally “unconnected”) is the name traditionally applied to planets placed 150° apart.

The term itself suggests a state of natural aversion. Such a relationship was considered unfortunate or 'alien' and the planets placed at this geometrical relationship were said to “turn away from each other”, indicating an almost malevolent lack of sympathy.

In classical literature the term 'ablepton' meaning 'not seen' or 'blind' is frequently encountered, as is 'asyndeto'n meaning 'unconnected', 'aversum'/'turned away from', and 'alienum'/'unfamiliar'. Modern astrologers refer to an “Inconjunct” as a “Quincunx” http://www.skyscript.co.uk/aspects.html


visual attachment illustrates the classical traditional aspects :smile:
 

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