D.o.b: april/29/1983
Time: 12:58pm
Place: montreal,quebec
I feel really silly for bringing this up but I feel very burdened in life. Particularly with my mother and family. I have already been dealing with misfortunes by the last dasha period of my life then I hit my saturn return and my sade sati. Now that saturn has moved to sagittarius I want to move forward but my old burdens remain. One main complaint is my mother. While she has been so supportive during my sade sati, she has also opposingly been an issue in my past and present. I have always been restricted by her and overwhelmed by demands. I remember as a child I always wanted to run away but instead I stayed in my head alot. Now after having gone thru such a tumultuous period in my life, I was hoping to rebuild my life from nothing. I had nothing then and I have nothing now. Im essentially starting life at age 34. But that blockage is still there. My mother is so use to me doing her bidding that its so tough to get her to not rely on me. Every little thing that she does not understand is followed by my name being called. I cant have a moments rest. If its not from charging her cellphone, its to setting her alarm clock, to setting the washer for her laundry, to setting the dishwasher for her to wash the dishes. The list goes on to even smaller things that i'm sure a mouse can figure out. Of course she lives in a foreign land and doesnt speak english but she didnt arrive yesterday. She arrived 30 years ago. Im sure she should know how to use a washer by now. I have done everything. I have talked reasonably, i have put up a fight, i have gone silent, i have left instructions. Its all brushed aside as if its not important. I have tried going days without speaking with her to prove a point. I know this may seem trivial to some but its tough for me to say no even though I'm forced to. I innately always want to help but i also see myself losing my identity and i'm already 34 without a start on life and here is a HUGE blockage. I wanted to start school in January of 2018 but i'm afraid to start something i wont be able to accomplish because...every half an hour i'm being beckoned. The resentment and frustration alone wont help my studies. I don't know what to do. Will I ever gain freedom? How can I escape this? When will I escape this? Oddly I have asked these questions before in my adolescence.
Time: 12:58pm
Place: montreal,quebec
I feel really silly for bringing this up but I feel very burdened in life. Particularly with my mother and family. I have already been dealing with misfortunes by the last dasha period of my life then I hit my saturn return and my sade sati. Now that saturn has moved to sagittarius I want to move forward but my old burdens remain. One main complaint is my mother. While she has been so supportive during my sade sati, she has also opposingly been an issue in my past and present. I have always been restricted by her and overwhelmed by demands. I remember as a child I always wanted to run away but instead I stayed in my head alot. Now after having gone thru such a tumultuous period in my life, I was hoping to rebuild my life from nothing. I had nothing then and I have nothing now. Im essentially starting life at age 34. But that blockage is still there. My mother is so use to me doing her bidding that its so tough to get her to not rely on me. Every little thing that she does not understand is followed by my name being called. I cant have a moments rest. If its not from charging her cellphone, its to setting her alarm clock, to setting the washer for her laundry, to setting the dishwasher for her to wash the dishes. The list goes on to even smaller things that i'm sure a mouse can figure out. Of course she lives in a foreign land and doesnt speak english but she didnt arrive yesterday. She arrived 30 years ago. Im sure she should know how to use a washer by now. I have done everything. I have talked reasonably, i have put up a fight, i have gone silent, i have left instructions. Its all brushed aside as if its not important. I have tried going days without speaking with her to prove a point. I know this may seem trivial to some but its tough for me to say no even though I'm forced to. I innately always want to help but i also see myself losing my identity and i'm already 34 without a start on life and here is a HUGE blockage. I wanted to start school in January of 2018 but i'm afraid to start something i wont be able to accomplish because...every half an hour i'm being beckoned. The resentment and frustration alone wont help my studies. I don't know what to do. Will I ever gain freedom? How can I escape this? When will I escape this? Oddly I have asked these questions before in my adolescence.
