Hey, I really like what's going on here on this thread. Facing your fear, getting the facts straight, being honest about unresolved feelings, making an action plan for them. This is great.
In my home town, there were organizations like Safety Council, or parts of Red Cross, that sent speakers to our schools about being safe, driving safely, what to do in emergency, etc. You might try contacting them with your willingness to go speak at schools. There are also defensive driving courses offered online and through organizations like these that might help you regain a sense of empowerment about future events. I've seen these make tremendously strong positive changes in the driving techniques as well as confidence in the driver. AAA Automobile club is also concerned with safe driving practices, and might be able to send you in a constructive direction. I'm also wondering about being a guest speaker/activity director for one meeting of a girl scout, or other club/tribe meeting. Rotaries are being built into the traffic system in a lot of places where people don't know what to do. You could teach how to navigate them. Among the people I know who have had traffic accidents, the left turn accident hitting the hidden oncoming vehicle is the most common and has done the worst damage. I'm sorry the consequences were so very serious for you. I'm glad that you are moved to do something very constructive about it though! If only me and my friends had had just 5 minutes of a lecture on hidden vehicles like that, we may have all avoided our accidents!
There's something else to know about Solar Return charts.
They are not EVENT predictors, in themselves. As I understand it, the chart symbolizes the highlights of the year ahead in terms of the psychological situations that will present themselves to you. You get to choose to respond. Of course when one thing comes up to another, anywhere in life, there are standard options. Full head on confrontation, stay the course, do not change. Avoidance/ Run around the bush/ Turn Away - Loose progress/ Denial. Synthesizing/Transforming/going through. Synthesizing may seem to be the perfect answer in theory, but actually there are appropriate times for the other approaches, too.
I find that if there oppositions or squares to Pluto, fear is part of the psychological experience.
Pluto driven fear, is a chance for you to evolve, to change, to start functioning on a higher level of your ideals. Fear forces us to thin out our 'baggage'. Have you ever taken a ropes course, or zipline ? Or perhaps watched it in a video? Becoming familiar with what happens within us, when fear is present, helps us sort those frantic anxious thoughts, into useful ones, and others that aren't helping.
I'm not yet convinced that a repeating trine is indication of another terrifying year.
But I was taught that the fear we experience is usually the memory of pain and fear we've had before, and not the sensing of what is to come. And yet, I know that I have had times when I sensed fearful times coming, and they did. It's not clear to me thought that I sensed the future. Rather, I think some denied fear within me was coming up, in spite of my self control, and coloring everything I sensed. What I needed to do was acknowledge the denied fear, and finish that, so I could get on with life. But I didn't. And I had losses. So I wonder if you've come to a point in life where 'fear' - loss of a sense of security because awful things like the accident and everything that followed -- is coming up and demanding to be dealt with. At least dealt with, more than has been done so far.
Hey, I know a lady who sells insurance that is for veterans only, as her way of compensating for a deadly auto accident. The auto and life insurance the deceased family had, got them through a horrible time. She had connections to the insurance business, and was good at sales. So she goes about making certain all the veterans have adequate insurance for an affordable price. She is passionate about her business, and well appreciated for her work.
So read your solar return chart as the highlights of situations presented to your psyche, in lieu of events. Think more along the lines of your free will as making the events.
Saturn in the 7th Solar Return, means responsibility goes hand in hand with strong partnerships. Partnership can be business, friendship, romantic, etc. You can feel burdened by the responsibility or tackle it. It may come in the form of dealing with someone older, more serious, or even someone with limitations physical or otherwise. Sounds like this time of work in these stores with this manager is just like this 7th house Saturn. Sounds like you did an excellent job of tackling the burdens of Saturn. They say, if you tackle the work, you've earned some good chances at reward later, when it is time. Well it makes sense. You've gained good experience and will be able to apply that later, anywhere.
So good for you and all your strong positive choices you've made and are making. Take note of what fear does to your thinking and your body, and learn how to listen to it and use it constructively. Everyone has fear jumping off a cliff. For some it will prevent them from reaching for the trapeze coming their way. For others it will make them focus their energy even better, to actually jump up and grab that trapeze. For most everyone, it's recommended you have a belay system, backup plan.
Go for it!
