Why did he cancel our date?

scahm

Well-known member
Things were going really well with this guy that I had started speaking to - he seemed really interested in me and we really seemed to click. We had arranged for me to travel to finally meet him for a date in person (we live far apart, but I travel to work in his city for most of the week), but he cancelled abruptly an hour before I was supposed to leave.

He says he's sick, but he had told me that he was out drinking with his friends the night before, so I'm skeptical of his excuse and also quite annoyed. We were speaking constantly and he's now gone radio silent too.

Is there another girl involved? Has he suddenly lost interest in me? If so, why?
 

Attachments

  • Screenshot 2020-06-11 at 11.16.03.jpg
    Screenshot 2020-06-11 at 11.16.03.jpg
    60.9 KB · Views: 70
  • Screenshot 2020-06-11 at 11.16.12.png
    Screenshot 2020-06-11 at 11.16.12.png
    69 KB · Views: 36

kalinka

Well-known member
yes, it seems he is involved with another woman. That's Mars here- receptions tell it. Next moon aspects are not benefic and Mercury will opposite Jupiter at last. Mars interfers this aspect with the sextile to Jupiter. Jupiter isn't interested in Mercury and Moon but in Mars. Also Jupiter is retrograde-he backed out.Sorry to say :-(
 

scahm

Well-known member
yes, it seems he is involved with another woman. That's Mars here- receptions tell it. Next moon aspects are not benefic and Mercury will opposite Jupiter at last. Mars interfers this aspect with the sextile to Jupiter. Jupiter isn't interested in Mercury and Moon but in Mars. Also Jupiter is retrograde-he backed out.Sorry to say :-(

Thank you, I knew something was weird about him suddenly being 'sick'. I'm inclined to think that he was actually on another date with a girl, instead of being out with his friends, which is why he cancelled things so abruptly.
 

Chrysalis

Well-known member
Your both in each other's 5th house, so this is a good start. Moons angular, that's good too. Lot of truth @ 19° Libra but in a pitted degree, which him Jupiter retrogrades towards. So he was telling the truth to some extent. My guess would be yes he did go out the night before [this was the truth], but he didn't feel as ill as he was making out, so some truth but not all truth.

Does he still want to meet up at some other point? His part of desire for you is @21° Pisces conjunct Neptune in the 7th. Which sun is square and him Jupiter retrogrades away from. Yes, right now he doesn't seem viable.

Just leave him to it scahm, and even if he does reach out again at some point be wary of him.
 

scahm

Well-known member
Your both in each other's 5th house, so this is a good start. Moons angular, that's good too. Lot of truth @ 19° Libra but in a pitted degree, which him Jupiter retrogrades towards. So he was telling the truth to some extent. My guess would be yes he did go out the night before [this was the truth], but he didn't feel as ill as he was making out, so some truth but not all truth.

Does he still want to meet up at some other point? His part of desire for you is @21° Pisces conjunct Neptune in the 7th. Which sun is square and him Jupiter retrogrades away from. Yes, right now he doesn't seem viable.

Just leave him to it scahm, and even if he does reach out again at some point be wary of him.

He mentioned rescheduling but hasn't proposed an alternate date. Do you also see interest in another girl, Chrys? I'm more so confused by how he came across as very interested and keen up until the moment he cancelled, and feel like I just want to know why the sudden change of heart.
 

Chrysalis

Well-known member
His lot of adultery is @20° Leo. Jupiter retrogrades towards the lot and sun the ruler of the lot is square Neptune. So we have the sun/Neptune again.

Lot of separation is @ exactly 9°'03 Saggitarius which venus retrograde opposes. Venus is his 3rd ruler. He's seeing this as the end. But then again he might want to keep you there (sun/Neptune) "just incase".

He is most likely not interested anymore scahm, it's so easy these days to meet someone else online. Just put it down to experience, it wasn't meant to be. Just don't let him mess you around and start breadcrumbing you.
 

scahm

Well-known member
His lot of adultery is @20° Leo. Jupiter retrogrades towards the lot and sun the ruler of the lot is square Neptune. So we have the sun/Neptune again.

Lot of separation is @ exactly 9°'03 Saggitarius which venus retrograde opposes. Venus is his 3rd ruler. He's seeing this as the end. But then again he might want to keep you there (sun/Neptune) "just incase".

He is most likely not interested anymore scahm, it's so easy these days to meet someone else online. Just put it down to experience, it wasn't meant to be. Just don't let him mess you around and start breadcrumbing you.

You can't help taking these things personally but it is what it is, I guess. Thanks for your response though, at least I know what's up.
 

scahm

Well-known member
Your both in each other's 5th house, so this is a good start. Moons angular, that's good too. Lot of truth @ 19° Libra but in a pitted degree, which him Jupiter retrogrades towards. So he was telling the truth to some extent. My guess would be yes he did go out the night before [this was the truth], but he didn't feel as ill as he was making out, so some truth but not all truth.

Does he still want to meet up at some other point? His part of desire for you is @21° Pisces conjunct Neptune in the 7th. Which sun is square and him Jupiter retrogrades away from. Yes, right now he doesn't seem viable.

Just leave him to it scahm, and even if he does reach out again at some point be wary of him.

Chrys, how do you calculate the part of desire? I've been using this Arabic Parts Calculator: http://working-cycles.com/arabic_parts_chart.php but this results in his part of desire coming up as 8 degrees cancer.

Do you know if that website's inaccurate for part calculations?
 

scahm

Well-known member
yes, it seems he is involved with another woman. That's Mars here- receptions tell it. Next moon aspects are not benefic and Mercury will opposite Jupiter at last. Mars interfers this aspect with the sextile to Jupiter. Jupiter isn't interested in Mercury and Moon but in Mars. Also Jupiter is retrograde-he backed out.Sorry to say :-(

To update, he told me that he had a major work deadline due today and he was worried about getting things done whilst he was sick (I'm not sure what that has to do with our date though... I suppose he's saying he wanted to rest).

I've noticed that Mars is ruling his 10th and 3rd house in the chart - do you think this is a reflection of that, Kalinka, or is he lying and Mars is definitely another woman?
 

kalinka

Well-known member
To update, he told me that he had a major work deadline due today and he was worried about getting things done whilst he was sick (I'm not sure what that has to do with our date though... I suppose he's saying he wanted to rest).

I've noticed that Mars is ruling his 10th and 3rd house in the chart - do you think this is a reflection of that, Kalinka, or is he lying and Mars is definitely another woman?

since you asked specifically about another woman, Mars was clearly a rival in my oppinion: Jupiter's next aspect is to Mars.Mars in Jupiter's rulership and Jupiter in Mars' exaltation. on the other hand, Mercury and Mars are in mutual reception by fall...Also we have to notice that the Jupiter/Mars aspect is applying, happens before Mercury goes in opposition to Jupiter= there is no happy end for you both in the future, especially because the reception is just one-sided here(Mercury receives Jupiter but not the other way around).
Now you told that he was busy with work, which makes totally sense because as you said-Mars is his 10th house ruler. So he could indeed told the truth here.
However, Jupiter is retrograde and essential debilitated, which is an indication for someone, who can act hypocritical and untrustworthy. And Jupiter will stay for a while in this condition-so there will be no change in his behavior anytime soon.
Sun as his co-ruler is in Mercury's domicile.Hence there is indeed attraction from his side for you. But Venus, your co-ruler, is also retrograde and separated from a conjunction with the Sun. And moon's last aspect before she makes the sextile to Jupiter, will also be a square to the Sun- at the same time when Moon conjoins with Neptune.This just emphasizes the Jupiter/Mercury opposition- and there is no reception between Sun and Moon, so there is less chance that it will end up well. Moon/Jupiter sextile at the end is useless.
 
Last edited:

aquarius7000

Well-known member
Hi,

To your specific Q "Why did he cancel our date"

Jup. (he) is in your 5th house, which shows an affair or a flirt, but just about that. Jup is rx, so he is retracting and rethinking things.

The Moon, the heart of the chart and the situation itself, has just changed signs, so there has been a change of situation. He has had a change of heart. Notice that the Moon has now entered the sign of Mercury''s (you) detriment = his romantic feelings for you have come to an end. Again, change of situation and change of heart. Moon's next aspect will be to Venus and Moon exalts Venus, and Moon is in his sign - literally reflecting the situation. Notice that Moon is entering from his 12th ouse (chart's 6th) into his house). Also, notice that Venus is rx = a past romantic interest. Venus symbolises this other woman. I bet this is the case of an ex flame. Jupiter also is rx, so is also thinking towards some past flame. However, Moon will square Venus, so I think the girl will dump him, there will be discord.

Scahm, please update your threads with the developments, so that we can learn.
 

scahm

Well-known member
Thank you both for your detailed responses, it's much appreciated. I couldn't help but take it quite personally when he cancelled, thinking it was something that I did that put him off perhaps - your responses have given me comfort in thinking that it wasn't me.

He's continuing to talk to me and is back to sounding really interested again, but I will stay wary of him knowing what I know now from this chart.
 
Last edited:

kalinka

Well-known member
I was reading your question again and there is something I have to add: To see what happened in the past (why he canceled the date), we have to look of course also at the past aspects. Jupiter didn't separate an aspect to any planet. so if we use the Sun as his co-ruler, we see that he recently past that square to Mars and both are in a hard aspect to Neptune, the planet of confusion and secrets. Why I don't take Venus for another woman is because her dispositor is mercury. Venus is L3, which we can use as significator for your planned date/meeting and your co-ruler. So what happened before Sun and Venus met, was the interference by Mars (Mars/Venus square). Venus and Sun are peregrine and were not in reception to each other, so this conjunction could be indeed prohibited. You wrote that he told he was ill but was out with friends a night before and now he told that he had to do something for his work, which is somehow doubtful. And there is your underlying question if his excuse is true. To see if he speaks the truth we look at his significators and at his 3rd house ruler,too- also Mars in that case. So something is curious with Mars beeing in conjunction with Neptune (but I can't tell what it means). However Mars is in his own triplicity. That's why I agree with Chrysalis-he told in half the truth. aquarius mentioned Jupiter retro is thinking about a past flame. Jupiter is in Saturn's rulership here-hence thinks about Saturn. Saturn is also retro, which is an indication that Saturn could be an ex.
 

scahm

Well-known member
I was reading your question again and there is something I have to add: To see what happened in the past (why he canceled the date), we have to look of course also at the past aspects. Jupiter didn't separate an aspect to any planet. so if we use the Sun as his co-ruler, we see that he recently past that square to Mars and both are in a hard aspect to Neptune, the planet of confusion and secrets. Why I don't take Venus for another woman is because her dispositor is mercury. Venus is L3, which we can use as significator for your planned date/meeting and your co-ruler. So what happened before Sun and Venus met, was the interference by Mars (Mars/Venus square). Venus and Sun are peregrine and were not in reception to each other, so this conjunction could be indeed prohibited. You wrote that he told he was ill but was out with friends a night before and now he told that he had to do something for his work, which is somehow doubtful. And there is your underlying question if his excuse is true. To see if he speaks the truth we look at his significators and at his 3rd house ruler,too- also Mars in that case. So something is curious with Mars beeing in conjunction with Neptune (but I can't tell what it means). However Mars is in his own triplicity. That's why I agree with Chrysalis-he told in half the truth. aquarius mentioned Jupiter retro is thinking about a past flame. Jupiter is in Saturn's rulership here-hence thinks about Saturn. Saturn is also retro, which is an indication that Saturn could be an ex.

Hm, interesting. We had actually agreed to meet earlier, but I was feeling really ill and I rescheduled that date as I didn't feel well enough to travel to see him - do you think that could relate to the Mars/Neptune conjunction?

Interesting that everyone is mentioning an ex here - I'm inclined to think that he ran into an ex on that night out with his friends and something happened between them, which is why he is so abruptly cancelled our date the next day.
 
Top