AscendingStarseed
Member
Hi all,
I'm in Hawaii and have going through some very weird stuff that's left me feeling like I'm stepping (or being pushed) through a doorway, the other side of which is as dark as a moonless, starless night; so dark, I can't even see if there is a floor on which my foot will land. I'm alone in this "journey" out of one dimension with no guidance at all, no one on this Big Island to turn to for knowledge or who could or would answer my questions, and I can't see anyone on the other side of the door I'm being pushed through.
I started with the tarot seeking some confirmations and perhaps guidance, which led back to astrology, which has sucked me in purely because I need answers, and knowing so little about it, they are coming waaaaaaaaay too slowly! I cannot do the research and study fast enough to beat the rate at which I'm "falling" through the door (ascending to some other dimension or vibration or frequency or...argh!). I need help, fast.
I'm here asking to have three natal charts read: mine, my significant other's, and my 21-year old son's (which worries me, mostly because I don't have enough knowledge to avoid jumping to conclusions). I need mine interpreted more in depth because of events in the past year or so that I feel must be "karmic" in nature and destiny-related, and which are happening faster and faster and I can't keep up. My head's spinning and I need to focus, but I can't see anything clearly for the spinning and the darkness on the other side of the "door" (may be Pluto related?). I would like my partner's read in sufficient depth to see if I'm missing anything important, karmically speaking and future-related, to ensure any karmic debt of mine has been settled through our having met and discern when we are to part ways because our relationship has served its purpose (and I must ask for help because I have Pluto conjunct Venus in my 5th house in my Solar Return chart, which may be why I am compelled -- uncharacteristically, and almost to the point of obsession -- to return to this on-and-off relationship despite its challenges & frustrations). My intuition (which has become super keen in the past about 8 months, like I've grown antennae) tells me one thing, but because I'm acting out of character and it could be Pluto-related, I'm not sure whether in this one area I dare trust it without something more concrete in our charts to offset the Plutonic possibilities. I could just be seeing what I want to see because I'm "blinded by love", know what I mean? I don't have time to waste chasing plutonic pipe dreams, while my entire life is shifting gears and setting me on a course to the unknown without a compass (somehow triggered by this karmic coupling), and especially after what I found in my son's natal chart today (which I was analyzing along with other family members' charts for the purposes of practice and sort of self-testing my understanding and interpretations of the different types of charts).
That brings me to my son's chart, which appears to have no less than 3 and possibly 6 separate and distinct mystical rectangles...but the four corners of all of then land in earth and water signs, which I read is a "rare and special" kind of mystical rectangle labeled "Lucifer's rectangle". These types of rectangles present enough challenges to the native, but with the indications pointing to interests in the occult and a possible proclivity to escapism through addiction or "dark side" activities, just the name of his type of mystic rectangle disturbs me, and when I see 3,4,5,6 of them piled one atop the other, I admit, it's got me nervous. He's always been a great kid, good in school, got through high school and first year of college sober (having conquered addiction and escapist tendencies myself, I thought somehow figured if he made it to age 21 without taking a drink or smoking pot, we were home free). I'm questioning that conclusion now. I have a vivid imagination. I'm a very spiritual person; my son is not, having declared himself Atheist at age 9. He has no interest in the supernatural or anything spirit-related because, he says, he has never had any experiences not firmly grounded in the 3D world...never even seen a ghost. Me on the other hand, I have had many, many supernatural experiences, from seeing ghosts to spontaneous astral projection, and I know there's more "out there" than what we perceive, especially lately. I'm going through what someone I know called "ascension anxiety", and coupled with my vivid imagination, I'm wondering what on earth my son might have a proclivity for that would involve "dark" subject matters when he doesn't even believe there are light and dark energies, and the only escapist activity I've noticed is holing up in his room and playing on line video games in what I consider excess (I blame his father...I don't own a TV). What comes to mind is (gulp), could my quiet, introverted, highly intelligent son be a ticking time bomb? Could he become another Allestair Crowley, or far worse, another Adolph Hitler or a serial killer? Don't laugh until you see his chart. I do hope I'm being ridiculous and perhaps morose because of some influence in my own chart that I'm missing.
My chart's a bit of a doozy itself. I'm Aquarius (stellium of Sun, Saturn, Venus, MercuryRx, Jupiter and the South Node in Aquarius in the 7th and 8th houses for starters), with Cancer rising and my moon in Sag, and I also have Uranus Rx and Pluto Rx conjunct both Liliths Rx all in the 2nd house . It's amazing I even have a son! My son has his sun in Cancer, with Sag rising and his moon in Aquarius. How about that? And his father is a Sag. He also has 5 planets in retrograde (Saturn, Jupiter, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto) along with the Liliths Rx and Juno Rx (I'm thinking he has come karmic debt owed or due on account of a very bad past life relationship). And there goes my imagination again.
The more I learn, the more confused I get because I have no one to turn to for help, and I'm on a fixed income so I can't afford to pay to have readings done or charts interpreted or even to take on line courses. No answers come through meditation...only more weird transformational stuff that at this point just "is" -- a set of experiences with no cohesive direction. I feel like Alice must have when she fell down the rabbit hole.
I do hope you'll assist, give me some guidance here...I'm lost and nervous.
Thanks for "listening".
JC
I'm in Hawaii and have going through some very weird stuff that's left me feeling like I'm stepping (or being pushed) through a doorway, the other side of which is as dark as a moonless, starless night; so dark, I can't even see if there is a floor on which my foot will land. I'm alone in this "journey" out of one dimension with no guidance at all, no one on this Big Island to turn to for knowledge or who could or would answer my questions, and I can't see anyone on the other side of the door I'm being pushed through.
I started with the tarot seeking some confirmations and perhaps guidance, which led back to astrology, which has sucked me in purely because I need answers, and knowing so little about it, they are coming waaaaaaaaay too slowly! I cannot do the research and study fast enough to beat the rate at which I'm "falling" through the door (ascending to some other dimension or vibration or frequency or...argh!). I need help, fast.
I'm here asking to have three natal charts read: mine, my significant other's, and my 21-year old son's (which worries me, mostly because I don't have enough knowledge to avoid jumping to conclusions). I need mine interpreted more in depth because of events in the past year or so that I feel must be "karmic" in nature and destiny-related, and which are happening faster and faster and I can't keep up. My head's spinning and I need to focus, but I can't see anything clearly for the spinning and the darkness on the other side of the "door" (may be Pluto related?). I would like my partner's read in sufficient depth to see if I'm missing anything important, karmically speaking and future-related, to ensure any karmic debt of mine has been settled through our having met and discern when we are to part ways because our relationship has served its purpose (and I must ask for help because I have Pluto conjunct Venus in my 5th house in my Solar Return chart, which may be why I am compelled -- uncharacteristically, and almost to the point of obsession -- to return to this on-and-off relationship despite its challenges & frustrations). My intuition (which has become super keen in the past about 8 months, like I've grown antennae) tells me one thing, but because I'm acting out of character and it could be Pluto-related, I'm not sure whether in this one area I dare trust it without something more concrete in our charts to offset the Plutonic possibilities. I could just be seeing what I want to see because I'm "blinded by love", know what I mean? I don't have time to waste chasing plutonic pipe dreams, while my entire life is shifting gears and setting me on a course to the unknown without a compass (somehow triggered by this karmic coupling), and especially after what I found in my son's natal chart today (which I was analyzing along with other family members' charts for the purposes of practice and sort of self-testing my understanding and interpretations of the different types of charts).
That brings me to my son's chart, which appears to have no less than 3 and possibly 6 separate and distinct mystical rectangles...but the four corners of all of then land in earth and water signs, which I read is a "rare and special" kind of mystical rectangle labeled "Lucifer's rectangle". These types of rectangles present enough challenges to the native, but with the indications pointing to interests in the occult and a possible proclivity to escapism through addiction or "dark side" activities, just the name of his type of mystic rectangle disturbs me, and when I see 3,4,5,6 of them piled one atop the other, I admit, it's got me nervous. He's always been a great kid, good in school, got through high school and first year of college sober (having conquered addiction and escapist tendencies myself, I thought somehow figured if he made it to age 21 without taking a drink or smoking pot, we were home free). I'm questioning that conclusion now. I have a vivid imagination. I'm a very spiritual person; my son is not, having declared himself Atheist at age 9. He has no interest in the supernatural or anything spirit-related because, he says, he has never had any experiences not firmly grounded in the 3D world...never even seen a ghost. Me on the other hand, I have had many, many supernatural experiences, from seeing ghosts to spontaneous astral projection, and I know there's more "out there" than what we perceive, especially lately. I'm going through what someone I know called "ascension anxiety", and coupled with my vivid imagination, I'm wondering what on earth my son might have a proclivity for that would involve "dark" subject matters when he doesn't even believe there are light and dark energies, and the only escapist activity I've noticed is holing up in his room and playing on line video games in what I consider excess (I blame his father...I don't own a TV). What comes to mind is (gulp), could my quiet, introverted, highly intelligent son be a ticking time bomb? Could he become another Allestair Crowley, or far worse, another Adolph Hitler or a serial killer? Don't laugh until you see his chart. I do hope I'm being ridiculous and perhaps morose because of some influence in my own chart that I'm missing.
My chart's a bit of a doozy itself. I'm Aquarius (stellium of Sun, Saturn, Venus, MercuryRx, Jupiter and the South Node in Aquarius in the 7th and 8th houses for starters), with Cancer rising and my moon in Sag, and I also have Uranus Rx and Pluto Rx conjunct both Liliths Rx all in the 2nd house . It's amazing I even have a son! My son has his sun in Cancer, with Sag rising and his moon in Aquarius. How about that? And his father is a Sag. He also has 5 planets in retrograde (Saturn, Jupiter, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto) along with the Liliths Rx and Juno Rx (I'm thinking he has come karmic debt owed or due on account of a very bad past life relationship). And there goes my imagination again.
The more I learn, the more confused I get because I have no one to turn to for help, and I'm on a fixed income so I can't afford to pay to have readings done or charts interpreted or even to take on line courses. No answers come through meditation...only more weird transformational stuff that at this point just "is" -- a set of experiences with no cohesive direction. I feel like Alice must have when she fell down the rabbit hole.
I do hope you'll assist, give me some guidance here...I'm lost and nervous.
Thanks for "listening".
JC