Changing the Light Bulb – Through the Signs

Hope it was ok to copy this - i just thought it so funny!! In case there's too many words, it's in 2 parts (Part 2 in the next post) :
(from: http://www.veiledmoon.com/astrology.htm

Changing the Light Bulb – Through the Signs

How many members of your horoscope sign does it take to change a light bulb?

Part 1

ARIES: Just one. You want to make something of it?

TAURUS: One, but just "try" to convince them that the burned-out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

GEMINI: Two, but the job never gets done--they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done.

CANCER: Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grief process.

LEO: Leos don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo to do the job for them while they're out.

VIRGO: Approximately 1.0000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth.

Part 2

LIBRA: Er, two. Or maybe one. No - on second thought, make that two. Is that okay with you?

SCORPIO: That information is strictly secret and shared only with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical Order.

SAGITTARIUS: The sun is shining, the day is young and we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid light bulb?

CAPRICORN: I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

AQUARIUS: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so...

PISCES: Light bulb? What light bulb?

Just saw this same joke is on here a couple of times already, but never mind, just for the people who have not seen this yet..

I heard these at a talk recently by an astrologer.

I think he changed it slightly to 'how to ask a sun sign to change a light bulb'.

the aquarian one was - tell them not to!.

I knew this a bit different. It's all here:

http://www.adze.com/Classroom/lightbulb.html


[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Aries They changed it already.

Taurus Taurus gets bulbs that don't need changing.

Gemini At least two to take out the old bulb, two to shop for a new one, two to write a book about it and two more to discuss it on a talk show.

Cancer Their mom's change it for them. Anyway, they'd light a candle if they have to.

Leo None. Their domestic service professionals will change it.

Virgo Usually just one. However, they will need to clean the sockets, read comparative consumer information about light bulbs, check the wiring and read all the warranties, gaurantees and refund policies.

Libra[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] [/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] Well, at least two to shop for the bulb, and a couple more to look for accessories, and maybe a couple more to return the bulb if it didn't work and do lunch.

Scorpio A Scorpio light bulb isn't changed. It's transformed. You just push a button and activate the next life. Why do you ask? Are you a member of a law enforcement agency?

Sagittarius Sagittarians don't change lightbulbs, but they can teach you how to do it, for a fat fee.

Capricorn Their secretaries will get back to you.

Aquarius Aquarians don't have to change lightbulbs. They can invent better ones.

Pisces O dear God, I don't know. O that's it, the bulb will change itself, if it is God's will.

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I liked these ones as well:

http://www.adze.com/Classroom/bosses.html

http://www.adze.com/Classroom/excuses.html

http://www.adze.com/Classroom/flubugs.html


Bosses, excuses and flu bugs of the zodiac!