Qustions about Celibate marriage and Music Career

I have been reading so many excellent interpretations of individual charts on this site that I wondered if anyone would have the time to give me a few pointers (observations of natal chart,progressions,transits,solar chart--whatever you can manage) so that I can lift myself out of a rather unfortunate and disordered last few years.

While this year has been somewhat better than the last many,many years as my health has begun returning and I have begun studying music seriously again (which I did professionally before a long illness and would like to again), I'm wondering if this is a possible upward trend or of it's only a little bit of rest. I've done some reading about transits and being new to astrology,I think I've only succeeded in scaring myself! )


I have two main questions which are about my music and about my marriage. (I have transit Uranus squaring my moon in the 5th H and Neptune has just entered my husband's 7th H. Neptune will also be conjunct my Sun next year...so something is going on,but what?)

With the music (classical),I played piano with several orchestras as a teenager,was then an accompanist for singers. I became a singer myself,performed in a few operas, almost finished a doctorate in voice and taught for 5 years in a small university.Then I became ill with something that took more than 10 years to be correctly diagnosed. I suffered from the treatment of wrong diagnoses (e.g. one doctor treated me for asthma for 3 years,and my health became even worse due to that treatment). I was eventually diagnosed with an endocrine disorder (thyroid/adrenal problems),started to take medicine,and am now healthy. But I'm always wondering if my health will fail again (for many years,I couldn't concentrate,and I could barely walk a flight of stairs and needed to sleep 12-14 hours daily,etc.) I have a real NEED for musical self-expression--need to do it even if there won't be performing or a profession involved,but would SO much like to have both of those. I have been practicing and studying,and I am trying to decide whether I should go back to university and finish my doctorate (so I might be able to get a teaching job).

With my marriage,well...my husband is my friend and sweetheart,but we have had a celibate marriage almost entirely except for the first few months of our marriage (not something I would have chosen). Yep,nothing at all during this millenium (since 1999). Sad thing is,it wasn't that way before we got married so I had no clue it would turn out this way. Three years ago I caught him writing to women on a **** site so there are other problems other than just his lack of "energy"--he said he would quit and I have thought that to be the case. I feel indebted to him for helping me when I was sick, we really are good friends,and there is a lot of (non-sexual) affection in the relationship. Sometimes I wonder about things though--if he really is faithful,if we are just not going to bring the best out of each other or if our relationship could change for the better. It would almost seem strange at this point for the relationship to become sexual even though I'm not so keen on remaining celibate forever. (I will if we stay married.) I even wonder sometimes if something will happen so that we are free to find "truer" marriages. I don't think I could be the one to leave as I feel that I owe him so much and really like him.

So I guess I'm wondering whether I have a chance to develop the life that I would like? I have high hopes for the rest of my life (it's about time),but was wondering what my chart implies. Any help would be so welcome and appreciated. Thankyou-- Emmy

My birthdate is February 12,1958 10:55pm in Bitburg,Germany
Husband's birthdate is October 20,1956 12:52am in Tuscaloosa,Alabama
(we got married on May 10,1998)

Hi Emmy,

I would like to try and shed some light on the questions that you have, but I have a couple of preliminary questions to ask you before I proceed.

I've had a look at your chart and your husband's chart, and I'm wondering whether this is your second marriage. Were you married earlier on in life (before age 28, maybe even by age 22), to a man who had some personal problems of a perhaps emotional or psychological nature? I ask because I need to be clear on which houses and significators to use when discussing your current marriage.

Also, was your illness most debilitating ca. age 28 to 38? Does your husband write, teach, or sing? Or maybe even cook? Does he have pleasing (attractive) facial features, and short-to-medium height, with a slight tendency to put on weight? Again, I'm just trying to verify your charts...

Thanks,
Shanda

woah

Also, was your illness most debilitating ca. age 28 to 38? Does your husband write, teach, or sing? Or maybe even cook? Does he have pleasing (attractive) facial features, and short-to-medium height, with a slight tendency to put on weight? Again, I'm just trying to verify your charts...

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how could you get all that Shanda ??
sandeep

Hi,Shanda!
Wow! You're amazing! In answer to your questions,my present marriage is actually my first in a legal sense (and his second legal marriage),but I was engaged to a man,a wonderful composer of classical music, who had bipolar disorder and had been divorced a year before we met,so...yep,there were definitely emotional and psychological problems there. However,I was with that man from 1993- 1996 when I was 35-38 years old and not in my 20's. I did date someone for a couple of years from ages 27-29 who became a heavy drinker,but I wouldn't say that he had psychological or emotional problems as much as addictive tendencies.

My husband is a university professor who teaches music history,is involved in editing and publishing classical music,and sings as well--so,yes,he does all three! And he cooks at home--but not ever as a profession. I would describe him physically as you did (attractive face with a tendency to put on weight) except I would say that he is medium-tall in height (6 feet tall).

As for my illness (hypothyroidism mainly,for which I now take medication, but also with weakness in adrenal glands for which I am only being tested
every so often to see if it gets an worse), I was 17 years old the first time I went to a doctor for those problems and 44 when I was finally diagnosed correctly and given the proper medication. I was improperly diagnosed with asthma and given three different prescriptions which I took for three years
in my late 30's (36-39 years old)--my health really went downhill during that time,and I decided to go off the medication and stop seeing that doctor. Those effects lasted awhile though--those meds. affected my heart for awhile. I finally decided to stop blindly trusting others due to that experience (doctors as well as chiropractors and nutritionists) and started to do some research on my own. I must have read about fifty books on health and then thought that hypothyroidism sounded like exactly what I had. I went to a specialist (endocrinologist) who found the problem--although I did kind of figure it out myself through reading so much on health issues. It took me awhile after that to really build my health back up,even with the proper medication. Now I'm healthier than I can ever remember in my life,even as a teenager or child. I just never was really healthy at any time in my life that I remember (although I don't know about early,early childhood) until I got on meds. So in answer to your question,my health was the worst from the improper diagnosis (asthma meds.) about 1996-1999,but I was also not terribly robust and healthy before and after that until I got on meds.

Again,it's absolutely incredible that you picked up on all those details just from my chart. You're amazing! Thankyou from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to look at my chart! --Emmy

sskohli said:

woah

how could you get all that Shanda ??
sandeep

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Hi Sandeep,I am using the techniques of Vedic astrology to determine these things. As you may know, Vedic astrology is especially good at predictions of the concrete, circumstantial variety, and since Emmy is asking about concrete possibilities for her future, I figured that this system would be the best one to use. I actually study and practice modern Western astrology (and most recently began studying classical Western astrology as well) and Vedic astrology alongside each other, as I find the two to be complimentary in many ways. Let me give you an idea of the factors that helped me to make the statements that you were asking about.Vedic astrology typically uses the main birthchart, which gives details on the life as a whole in general, along with other divisional charts that give more details about specific areas of life. It also utilizes surprisingly accurate timing systems known as dashas, the most popular of which being the Vimshottari dasha system. From knowing the position of the Moon at the time of birth, the astrologer can calculate a scheme of planetary periods which strongly influence the life of the native for specific intervals of time. The planet ruling the particular period of time that you want to know about can be studied in order to determine the types of events that will likely unfold during that time. This is how I pinpointed the critical period of Emmy's illness.The most important of the divisional charts is the navamsa, which besides being specifically used for marriage predictions, is also considered a general purpose chart as far as destiny and fortunes are concerned. I looked at the first house (called the Lagna) in both Emmy's husband's main chart and his navamsa in order to determine his likely appearance. Different zodiac signs appearing in the Lagna are descriptive of height and build, and those descriptions are modified depending on which planets (if any) occupy and/or aspect the Lagna. I realize now that I didn't consider the influence of Rahu (the North Node of the Moon in Western astrology) on Emmy's husband's Lagnas, and that is presumably why I mis-stated his height. Hindsight is, of course, 20/20!In Vedic astrology, the 2nd house represents the face, amongst other things; I had to study Emmy's husband's 2nd house, therefore, to figure out what he probably looks like, face-wise. He has strong benefics (Jupiter and Venus) there, indicating that his face should be handsome; I paired this with the indications from his main chart and navamsa Lagnas, which also suggested a physically attractive person. The confluence of indications, then, led me to feel good about that statement.The cooking thing was indicated by the connections between the 2nd and 6th houses, along with the presence of the Moon in Aries in the 10th and the aspect of Mars onto the 2nd house, and the rulership that Mars has on the 10th house. In Vedic astrology, the Moon (food and nurturing), Mars ("fiery" activites that may include the use of knives, like cooking), and connections between these to the 2nd (the food that is eaten) and 6th (appetite) houses can indicate an interest in cooking.For Emmy's husband's other preferred activities and/or career details, I had to look at his main chart as a whole, and also give some consideration to what was being indicated in the navamsa. The teaching, singing, and writing abilities really stand out in his chart, because his 2nd house (representing teaching traditonal knowledge and speech in Vedic astrology) is emphasized beneficially, while his 3rd house (which represents singing and the performing arts) contains a Mercury (writing) which has just passed its deepest point of exaltation. The presence of his Lagna lord Moon in the 10th house (profession) suggests working with people, and being aspected by a beneficial Jupiter (teaching), added detail to the picture that I was seeing overall. As I've mentioned, Venus and Jupiter are in his 2nd house of teaching, and they emphasize this likelihood because Venus is lord of the 4th house (which represents educational training and degrees of higher learning), and Jupiter is lord of the 9th house (university education). So all of this points to the conclusions that I drew.The foregoing are just a few examples of how useful Vedic astrology is in helping to determine specific, concrete activities and circumstances of life. Used alongside the important and equally useful psychological insights to be gained by considering the chart from the modern Western perspective, very much can be learned, for the ultimate benefit of the person that you're doing the reading for. Okay, end of commercial! Do let me know if you'd like to find out more. I'm always happy to share!Shanda

wow shanda
really impressive..
i am also into vedic astrology..i am from delhi, india..

Used alongside the important and equally useful psychological insights to be gained by considering the chart from the modern Western perspective, very much can be learned, for the ultimate benefit of the person that you're doing the reading for.

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i am also in the opinion of combining the two, though i haven't started much with western astrology.. i am awaiting some books..and will start soon..
any tips..suggestions on where should i start...

thanks again
sandeep
(p.s. i will have to go through your interpretation again..i could learn soooo much...)

Dear Emmy,


I thank you for the compliment, but I must give credit where credit is due: it is because of the wondrous abilities of the Vedic astrology system that I was able to provide such details from your chart. I am happy to be able to share what little knowledge I have in the hopes of helping others, and I sincerely hope that you will be helped by what I have to tell you.


The non-robust state of your health that you spoke of is strongly indicated in your chart; one might even say that paying attention to your health has been, is, and likely will continue to be a major life lesson for you. I really commend you for your positive, forward-looking attitude despite this. Looking ahead at your upcoming planetary periods (called dashas in Vedic astrology), I see that, while you may return to your PhD studies during this time, there are likely to be some health setbacks beginning fairly soon (I'm estimating Spring 2008 as a non-definite start time). These health issues will likely continue on in some form through 2010, but the good news is that, at some point in 2009, there could be a miraculous reversal which will see things improving along these lines in a notable way; thereafter, your health could experience a gradual return to higher, positive levels. As I said, you may certainly return to your studies, but know that the health concerns will likely be a distraction, and that you may experience problems relating to some circumstance of your studies that is maybe research related. By the close of 2010, you may have been able to make enough progress to get your degree, but if not, the way should be clear for that achievement thereafter, no later than 2013. 2010 to 2013 should be a very good period for you academically if you're still studying, or professionally if you're done with the degree and looking for a university position.


I would like to discuss your concerns about your husband, etc. tomorrow, so that I can get the chance to have another look at his chart. I will say this much now, though: he is a man of some truly wonderful qualities, judging from his chart, and he is very committed to your marriage, despite its problems. In fact, even if you decide that you want to a divorce, he will not agree to it easily at all. But as I said, more on this tomorrow...


Until then, take care...
Shanda

Hi,Shanda!
Thankyou so much for looking at my chart! I'm wondering if you can tell what nature of health problem I might be dealing with starting in the spring. In addition to my thyroid problem,which is mostly taken care of by medication now,I have had some digestive problems in the last several years (heartburn and perhaps ulcers). I have had to deal with that only with diet and meditation,etc. because I had extreme reactions to all of the drugs I tried (I guess that's a fairly typical Neptune in the 1st house thing!). So I'm wondering whether the problem looks to you like weakness and fatigue or like a digestive problem-- or if perhaps it's something entirely new....
The other question I have is--could it be someone ELSE's health problem and not my own that I'm dealing with at that time? I have been preoccupied by the health problems of my parents for nearly the last couple of years (mother has Alzheimer's and father has a very debilitating skin problem). I know it's hard to say sometimes who actually has the problem as transit house concerns can switch between people sometimes.

It's interesting that you mention a problem connected with "research" concerning my degree!! That's basically the only difficult thing I have left to do in the degree--the dissertation,which will involve a lot of research! That's the thing I question myself about--whether I can actually do it.

I'm wondering whether you can tell by looking at my chart whether I was meant to do music as a career or just as a hobby(Neptune ruling 5th house). In my less optimistic moments,it seems to that maybe I was never really meant to do anything much...as I worked so hard and then got nowhere in the end. Maybe it's just not destined? I would sure hate to go back to school and then not be able to finish the degree (as it involves living away from home--completely on the opposite side of the US!). I just don't know what else I would do for a living -or what I would WANT to do. Nothing else has ever really appealed to me,and it almost makes me instantly sad to even think of the possibility of having to do something else.
Can you tell what it looks like I do for a "career" based on my chart--if I had not told you I was a musician? Thankyou again for your interest and kindness. --Emmy

Dear Sandeep,


It's always great to run into a "dual practitioner" like myself! How long have you been studying astrology?


As far as recommendations for beginning the study of modern Western astrology go, I'd suggest books by Stephen Arroyo (especially his Chart Interpretation Handbook and Astrology, Karma, and Transformation) and Tracy Marks. Also, there's a website that I would recommend, where there's a collection of pages detailing the basics:


http://www.astrology-numerology.com/astrology.html


Take care (and happy studies),
Shanda

hi shanda
i am pretty new, i just started 2 years ago.
So yes a rookie.
Western I haven't even started, got a few Arroyo's book of the net, just startedreadin them.
thanks a lot for the books,
see you around,
would love to see more of your interpretations..
you too from india?
sandeep

Dear Emmy,


Your chart very strongly indicates a career in teaching, specifically teaching in the arts and/or history. [Do you have any particular interest in military and/or political history?] There is repeated confirmation of this in your Vedic charts and in your Western chart. I even looked at your Western chart using some of the knowledge I've recently gained in my studies of classical Western astrology, and still, your strongest career path is one of teaching, possibly again in the arts or in history. I won't go into the details here, as it would take up a whole lot of space, but really, I've seen a lot of charts by now, and yours is quite clear on your career path, which is a good indication that you will be able to pursue a career, despite everything else that has happened. [If anyone would like to see the details of my interpretation, just ask, and I'll share...]


Now, the reason that you've had setbacks, as you know, is due to your health. Specifically, the past decade hasn't been very helpful career-wise, but that is about to change. This ups and downs thing is really not that unusual, as each person's life is roughly "planned out" from the beginning, from a metaphysical viewpoint, and some people's plan includes having periods of trouble and struggle followed by great achievements...and vice versa. So, it is true even at the personal level of existence that everything has its season, including withdrawal from public life, and now that you've done that (or been compelled to do so), the times, they are a changin'.


It's interesting that you mentioned your parents' health, as the upcoming period may be difficult for your mother, healthwise. As for you, yes, digestive problems may resurface, but problems connected to the heart or a return of troubles related to the hyperthyroidism may occur. I'm glad to hear that you have been meditating, as that is exactly what I was going to recommend to you.


I'm going to send you a PM regarding your questions about your marriage, if you don't mind. I feel that the information that I wish to share with you is of a sensitive and private nature, and perhaps shouldn't be posted in a public forum.


Shanda

Hi,Shanda!
Again,you amaze me! I DO have some very odd interest in military history as my father was in WWII and my husband knows quite a bit about the field (even though professionally he is strictly a music historian). Also,my husband's father was an engineer but worked for 25 years as a military analyst for the army-- so we all talk about things like that in my family.
I lived near an American Civil War battlefield for some time during my childhood and found it very interesting to study (even as a kid),hiking the grounds and tracing the areas of battle(what a funny little girl,huh?). I have also always loved reading about political history and archaeology.

Also,I taught a music history course for non-music majors for six years (sort of like music appreciation) and could go back to teaching something like that..but I have to admit I really hated it. I liked lecturing,but didn't want to be teaching at such a "lowly" level,and I have no professional degrees in music history. I also felt like I wanted to be teaching actual music lessons (especially voice lessons) rather than music appreciation. In some ways,the experience I got from having taught music appreciation has been valuable for my private teaching although it would really be awful to go back to doing that and I would only do it if I couldn't do what I wanted and I ended up completely broke financially,so that doesn't sound like a career but a catastrophe! )) I guess in some ways I'd rather go ahead and just be an amateur musician rather than have a "frustrated" career and only be able to function at the bottom levels,professionally.(that's why I asked you the question about usic being a "hobby" rather than a career) I feel as if that's what I have been doing lately. I'm willing to work for any benefits,but also need to have the universe support me rather than,well,whatever it's been doing.... )) Thanks,Shanda! ---Emmy

Hi Sandeep,


Stephen Arroyo's books are an excellent first choice to make a start in studying Western astrology. His writing is clear, and his insights manage to be profound yet also practically applicable.


No, I'm not from India; I was born and raised in the United States. I am quite fond of Indian food and have a great respect for Indian culture (hence my interest in Vedic astrology, I suppose!), though. I'd also LOVE to visit there someday.

I'd be glad to share with you some of my reasoning for my interpretations. Do you have anything specifically that you want to hear more about?


Regards,
Shanda

Hi Emmy,


Again, the inference I drew regarding your interest in military and political affairs was a fairly simple one to arrive at, using Vedic astrology. The main thing pointing to your interest is the presence of a conjunction between Saturn (organizational structures) and Mars (fighting) in your 4th house (from the Ascending sign), coupled with the presence of the Sun (politics) in the 4th house from the Moon, which also receives an aspect from Saturn (positions of authority, history). It's interesting that you mention the interest that your family has in this area in general, since I find that the Vedic 4th house represents the "chosen" family of the native (i.e. the family that one marries into).


By the way, did you know that PBS is airing a new Ken Burns documentary on WWII on September 23? I suspect that this will be one of their nationally broadcast programs, so check your local listings if you're interested...


And as for the Universe offering support to you in your endeavors, it is a good thing to have that, isn't it? As I said before, you will have more of it, come Spring 2008, but you will have to make an effort to achieve your goals; it won't be all magically poof! and Easy Street, but then, what ever is? The point is that you'll have a fighting chance.


Did you receive the PM that I sent you?


Take care,
Shanda

Hi,Shanda!
Thanks for the tip about the Ken Burns documentary--I will definitely be watching! )
I will absolutely be making the biggest effort towards my musical goals that I can possibly make!! By the way,I hope you can see some inference of performing--classical piano and singing-- in my chart as well as the teaching,because it kind of all goes together (in order to finish my doctoral degree I would have to perform and in order to teach at a university I would also have to continue performing quite a bit...don't know if you can see that sort of extra detail in a chart or not,but it sure would be interesting to know). Anyway,that knowledge that I won't necessarily be squashed in my efforts by the universe helps so much to give me confidence to try to do what I want!! Thanks SO MUCH for all your help in looking at my chart--I so appreciate what you have done for my feeling of hope in the future. Thankyou.

Yes,I did receive the PM and sad as it is,it was uncanny again what you came up with! I wonder if there is anything I can do about the situation or if there will always be this strange dynamic between us and I'll just have to accept it if I stay with him. I'm also wondering if there is any way to know who was the mother and who was the child if there was a past life familial relationship (seems like it could go either way with us). Either way,you've come up with more information than I thought was possible through astrology!! You're REALLY amazing! Thanks!--Emmy

Hi Emmy,


Yes, performing is a part of the teaching, or could be if you wish it so. I'm sorry that I didn't make that clear before.


If I had to guess, I'd say that your husband was the mother in your past life relationship, but it's hard to be sure. It's not that uncommon for two souls to switch roles in relation to each other over many lifetimes, so at some point, you too could have been his mother.


Regards,
Shanda