Friends dating and it seems so weird to me! Composite attached.

Two of my best friends in the entire world are now dating. It all began before I got married and it started off at what seemed like a joke, but has now evolved into an actual committed relationship. I was skeptical as to whether it would really become anything but I guess I was proven wrong. One thing that strikes me as odd is how they are like two teenagers in love and it's almost repulsive to be sitting next to them constantly kissing (we are in our 30s). Venus is in the 12th house in their composite, so this is also why I find it confusing. Is that because it is sextile to Jupiter in the 7th?

Part of me wonders about the sincerity on her part - if she is just settling or is using him for something. I think he likes the attention because she is more attractive than he is and I think she likes the fact that he tells her this as well as other people. When they first got together she would tell me how he never wanted to have sex and now all she tells me is how much they do it (which grosses me out because he is like my brother and I don't want to think about him having sex). Which seems off to me since Mars squares Saturn.

I can see the Scorpio moon - which makes sense for him since he is usually attracted to the Scorpion types (possessive). They both act different around each other than when they were with other partners, so it is definitely interesting to observe.

Anyone have any thoughts on this? She is basically my sister and he is like a brother to me!

hi angelic

I get the same vibs you do from this composite..... it's weird . you might add eros and psyche into .
the mars/Neptune midpoint is conjunct the south node, so my suspicions are similar to yours..... is there some ulterior motives going on?
this aspect can be very sexual but usually it is between "partying couples".
mars square to Pluto/Saturn makes no sense for a uber in love couple. this is strong sexual aspect but one would not think of such public displays...and it is not a romantic aspect.. it is a sexual aspect.
and with the sun/moon midpoint conjunct to mars and square pluto/Saturn, this relationship is based on domination and selfish self aggrandizement . so I tend to agree with your ideas on this also. it is definitely not love .

the Venus/Uranus midpoint is square to the moon, so coupled with the mars/Neptune/south node aspect, she could just be experiencing intense orgasm with him. this may explain why she is not so concerned about their difference in physical appeal. this aspect would correlate with the uber romantic displays they are making.
with mercury square to Neptune,and mars/Neptune energy... I tend to think that alcohol or other party favorites are integral to the relationship.
otherwise , this aspect shows a lack of sincerity .
but then again Jupiter is trine to mercury and the venus/sun midpoint, so there is an element of love here but it is rare that a trine's effect is not overshadowed by strong harsh square such as exist here.
so in retrospect ,all the elements you described are in one way or another present in the composite.
it is unlikely this will be long term as the strong Saturn/pluto and the strong Uranus/venus/moon aspects act in opposed directions and usually show an intense affair that drops off like a stone.
please keep us advised

the south node transited the composite sun at the beginning of august and the south node is transited the composite mercury on nov 28th and square to Neptune on December 1st. so if this I when they hooked up, then the onus for their connection is on alcohol/party favorites.

rahu

I have often seen 'Sun or Venus in 12th' composites in very enduring, devoted relationships. It sometimes works like a ' we are in our own world' type of thing. And the square to Neptune may just enhance that element. It can bring about a deep sensitivity and empathy towards each other and bring out a protective nature in one or the other partner.

The mars/saturn square on the angles may eventually wear them down. However that Saturn/Pluto has a nice sextile to Neptune, and Jupiter is the midpoint of that sextile. So good feelings abound and they feel fortunate to have met. I think they are happy and feel grateful for the relationship. It may become a longterm problem that there are no planets in the bottom half of the chart however. There may not be a strong enough foundation to build upon in the future.

anjelik said:

Two of my best friends in the entire world are now dating. It all began before I got married and it started off at what seemed like a joke, but has now evolved into an actual committed relationship. I was skeptical as to whether it would really become anything but I guess I was proven wrong. One thing that strikes me as odd is how they are like two teenagers in love and it's almost repulsive to be sitting next to them constantly kissing (we are in our 30s). Venus is in the 12th house in their composite, so this is also why I find it confusing. Is that because it is sextile to Jupiter in the 7th?

Part of me wonders about the sincerity on her part - if she is just settling or is using him for something. I think he likes the attention because she is more attractive than he is and I think she likes the fact that he tells her this as well as other people. When they first got together she would tell me how he never wanted to have sex and now all she tells me is how much they do it (which grosses me out because he is like my brother and I don't want to think about him having sex). Which seems off to me since Mars squares Saturn.

I can see the Scorpio moon - which makes sense for him since he is usually attracted to the Scorpion types (possessive). They both act different around each other than when they were with other partners, so it is definitely interesting to observe.

Anyone have any thoughts on this? She is basically my sister and he is like a brother to me!

Click to expand...

I don't know, exalted Venus applying to a sextile with exalted angular Mars seems like a pretty harmonious sex life. Both Venus and Mars apply to Jupiter, with some interesting reception there among the three bodies, so that might amplify the fervor. Sex, sexuality, attraction, desire, are all mostly mystery. By that I mean that little is really understood about the compelling unconscious dynamics that bring two people together. So Venus in the 12th does not seem so odd to me, personally. And exalted [again, another exalted planetary body!] Saturn's square to and mixed reception with Mars can give energy and form to the expression of the sexual relationship.

These two friends may have quite possibly discovered something very fortunate for themselves?

rahu said:

hi angelic

I get the same vibs you do from this composite..... it's weird . you might add eros and psyche into .
the mars/Neptune midpoint is conjunct the south node, so my suspicions are similar to yours..... is there some ulterior motives going on?
this aspect can be very sexual but usually it is between "partying couples".
mars square to Pluto/Saturn makes no sense for a uber in love couple. this is strong sexual aspect but one would not think of such public displays...and it is not a romantic aspect.. it is a sexual aspect.
and with the sun/moon midpoint conjunct to mars and square pluto/Saturn, this relationship is based on domination and selfish self aggrandizement . so I tend to agree with your ideas on this also. it is definitely not love .

the Venus/Uranus midpoint is square to the moon, so coupled with the mars/Neptune/south node aspect, she could just be experiencing intense orgasm with him. this may explain why she is not so concerned about their difference in physical appeal. this aspect would correlate with the uber romantic displays they are making.
with mercury square to Neptune,and mars/Neptune energy... I tend to think that alcohol or other party favorites are integral to the relationship.
otherwise , this aspect shows a lack of sincerity .
but then again Jupiter is trine to mercury and the venus/sun midpoint, so there is an element of love here but it is rare that a trine's effect is not overshadowed by strong harsh square such as exist here.
so in retrospect ,all the elements you described are in one way or another present in the composite.
it is unlikely this will be long term as the strong Saturn/pluto and the strong Uranus/venus/moon aspects act in opposed directions and usually show an intense affair that drops off like a stone.
please keep us advised

the south node transited the composite sun at the beginning of august and the south node is transited the composite mercury on nov 28th and square to Neptune on December 1st. so if this I when they hooked up, then the onus for their connection is on alcohol/party favorites.

rahu

Click to expand...

Thanks rahu. They began being committed to each other some time in August I believe, so that is interesting! They do get along really well but you are right, this is a heavy drinking relationship. He is a big partier (I call him Benjamin Button because it's like he's reverse aging) and she used to be in her college days but since her job is unusual and she doesn't have the same days off as most people she calmed down over the years - because who wants to go out and party on a Tuesday when you have to go to work the next day? This doesn't affect his job - I lived with him for 9 months and it was almost like living alone since he went out 5-6 nights a week. I was watching them last week since I hadn't seen either of them in 6 months and it was like they became two different people when they got drunk together. Sober they were fine and it seemed like two friends but then when the alcohol comes in it's like baby talk voice and making out. I actually told them to stop because it was annoying me (we were in a pub in London and I couldn't even have a conversation with them without them just beginning to kiss). I don't want to sound like I am down on the relationship and maybe it's just me because I am not very showy with affection and I don't talk about it (my husband and I also have a 12th house Venus). I often wonder when people talk about stuff so much if they are trying to prove something to everyone else.

Btw he is very selfish and I've told him before that he will never have a successful relationship if he doesn't cut ties with this other woman. I wonder if he will do that for my friend because I know she is not happy about it. She has a Scorpio Mars so she is patiently waiting and planning her action (I wish I could do that haha). I did notice some selfish things on her part which I also didn't like - it's difficult because they are both my friends and I don't want either person being taken advantage of. She came over to England a week before him and she said to me that she didn't need to worry about money once he was here because he would pay for everything. She was also talking about what kind of Christmas gift he is going to get her and it's going to be big and trying to persuade him to take her to all these very expensive restaurants in NYC when he is literally a burger and beer kind of guy.

Most importantly, I don't want things to end poorly and then never be able to hang again because when I am with them we have such a fun time. They are two of my oldest and closest friends. If anything I could see her breaking it off with him and not the other way around, so I don't have to worry about him hurting her I don't think. If it does drop off, she will definitely pull the plug. I have seem him just wait for a woman to break up with him - but I think that is just a general male tactic since I myself have broken up with every single guy I have ever dated...but have I really? haha!

I also just worry that her expectations are different than his. She talks about moving in with him and he has said to me that he dated his last serious girlfriend for 4 years and she never moved in, so he doesn't have any intention of that happening. He is a nice guy and loyal once in a relationship but I do think he is just happy to have a casual, no pressure relationship.

IleneK said:

I don't know, exalted Venus applying to a sextile with exalted angular Mars seems like a pretty harmonious sex life. Both Venus and Mars apply to Jupiter, with some interesting reception there among the three bodies, so that might amplify the fervor. Sex, sexuality, attraction, desire, are all mostly mystery. By that I mean that little is really understood about the compelling unconscious dynamics that bring two people together. So Venus in the 12th does not seem so odd to me, personally. And exalted [again, another exalted planetary body!] Saturn's square to and mixed reception with Mars can give energy and form to the expression of the sexual relationship.

These two friends may have quite possibly discovered something very fortunate for themselves?

Click to expand...

I'm not doubting they have a good sex life. I just don't understand the need to constantly talk about it. "We did it three times this morning." kind of stuff. Or when I told them that they better not do anything the evening my husband's father was staying over and they joked that they would do it in the fireplace. Sometimes it's funny and that's because she is just outrageous and is a very funny person, but other times it's just too much and that's why I question the sincerity of things. I hope they are happy though - they are definitely physically a very unlikely couple. She is a 6ft blonde and he's a 5'5 ginger.

There is another woman my friend has had a turbulent relationship with since 2009. He likes to paint her as the stalker to any female he dates, but I know it's not true because I have seen his text messages to her where he has said he loves her, etc. It's funny because their composite has a ton of oppositions and I've always felt they were like magnets to each other. She has a boyfriend (who is long distance) and they actually hooked up two days before my wedding when she supposedly poured her feelings out and told him she would leave her bf for him and he supposedly said he didn't see her as more than friends (but then somehow ended up hooking up with her). He still hangs out with her (as friends only supposedly). I could never understand why they never officially dated - it was like a completely dysfunctional relationship in my opinion. They were essentially boyfriend and girlfriend for 5 years and then they both started secretly dating other people, but still hung out together. It was like that for years. I feel like she is the one thing holding him back from having a successful relationship. Can you tell in this composite if the love is one sided? I think they are fated, personally.

rahu said:

hi angelic

I get the same vibs you do from this composite..... it's weird . you might add eros and psyche into .
the mars/Neptune midpoint is conjunct the south node, so my suspicions are similar to yours..... is there some ulterior motives going on?
this aspect can be very sexual but usually it is between "partying couples".
mars square to Pluto/Saturn makes no sense for a uber in love couple. this is strong sexual aspect but one would not think of such public displays...and it is not a romantic aspect.. it is a sexual aspect.
and with the sun/moon midpoint conjunct to mars and square pluto/Saturn, this relationship is based on domination and selfish self aggrandizement . so I tend to agree with your ideas on this also. it is definitely not love .

the Venus/Uranus midpoint is square to the moon, so coupled with the mars/Neptune/south node aspect, she could just be experiencing intense orgasm with him. this may explain why she is not so concerned about their difference in physical appeal. this aspect would correlate with the uber romantic displays they are making.
with mercury square to Neptune,and mars/Neptune energy... I tend to think that alcohol or other party favorites are integral to the relationship.
otherwise , this aspect shows a lack of sincerity .
but then again Jupiter is trine to mercury and the venus/sun midpoint, so there is an element of love here but it is rare that a trine's effect is not overshadowed by strong harsh square such as exist here.
so in retrospect ,all the elements you described are in one way or another present in the composite.
it is unlikely this will be long term as the strong Saturn/pluto and the strong Uranus/venus/moon aspects act in opposed directions and usually show an intense affair that drops off like a stone.
please keep us advised

the south node transited the composite sun at the beginning of august and the south node is transited the composite mercury on nov 28th and square to Neptune on December 1st. so if this I when they hooked up, then the onus for their connection is on alcohol/party favorites.

rahu

Click to expand...

I'm still trying to figure this relationship out. She often has an issue with him being selfish and making plans with this other woman and his justification is that they have mutual friends so she will always be around. I told her that he needs to decide what is more important to him: a relationship with my friend or friendship with the woman he had a sexual relationship (basically dated) for 5 years. His cousin gave advice that she should say she wants to be invited but I think that just reinforces his selfishness and forces her to have to accept something that makes her unhappy. So I guess that is the selfish aspect you speak of. I asked her yesterday if she loved him and she said yes and she wants to marry him. I was like "really???" I just don't see it! I feel really bad that I still think there is something off and that it will eventually fade off. The only thing I can think is that she is settling because she doesn't feel she has other prospects? Also he spends money on taking her out and she never has to open her wallet. Maybe they're both being selfish and it works? I really wish I thought this was a serious thing but when majority of their time together involves her taking him home because he's too drunk and then contradicting that by saying he doesn't get very drunk when she is around only when he's out with his friends (he is going to be 35 and hangs out with 25 year olds) it makes it challenging for me not to wait for this to fizzle out. But I do think about her ex and he basically did the same thing, except he couldn't hold down a job so after 3 years she broke it off. Maybe she just has high tolerance? She has Neptune (exact at 1 degree Cap) conjunct her DC square Aries Venus in the 10th. Even yesterday after having a meltdown about him going to a concert with this other woman she later followed up everything with "we don't fight so..." It's almost like she feels that if people fight vs not fight their relationship is in a better place. I think not fighting for the sake of keeping the peace and sucking it up means one person is happy and the other is just accepting it. But I'm a fighter by nature so perhaps that's why? Haha I would never accept his behavior.

Sorry for ramble. I realized this is almost like a stream of consciousness now!

Well, it has come out that he has been leading a secret life and essentially using her as his beard. So there we have the hidden facets of the relationship.