Learning about astrology and would love some help and insights

Hi there, I'm on a long journey to learn astrology but its just so confusing for me, but I'm really dedicating myself to it this year. Its really helpful for me to have people point things out and explain how they got to that conclusion and I was hoping I could post my chart and get some feedback!

One thing to not about my personality is that I crave teachers but also feel rejected by teachers and have never had a strong connection with a teacher. Could this have anything to do with my Pluto?

Julia

Maybe this crave could be indicated by the 9th ruler opposing your moon.

Also sun and mercury in the 3rd.

Moreover a 3rd house planet opposing a 9th house planet.

People with sun opposite Pluto often have or had a dysfunctional relationship with their father. What kind of teacher do you want? If your image of an ideal teacher is a wise and kind older man, you might just be looking for a father figure.

Jupiter rules teachers. With your Jupiter conjunct Chiron and opposite Uranus-Neptune, you anticipate that an attempt to create a mentoring relationship will fail. Then your feelings (moon) are apt to be hurt. So maybe stop trying so hard. With your sun sextiling Jupiter, I think you can have mentors in your life.

Think about becoming your own teacher.

waybread said:

People with sun opposite Pluto often have or had a dysfunctional relationship with their father. What kind of teacher do you want? If your image of an ideal teacher is a wise and kind older man, you might just be looking for a father figure.

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Wise and kind older man sounds more like Saturn to me. Which is also a father symbol.

In the OP's case, Pluto is at her MC and is the modern ruler of her MC as well. Traditionally, the MC indicates the mother and the IC the father. In that light, it might mean a difficult relationship with her mother, not her father. Or with both parents: the MC/IC axis is read by some astrologers as simply the parental axis, in which either point can indicate either parent. It might also mean that one or both parents were simply away a lot--perhaps working long hours or distracted by major life issues.

Teacher can also be indicated by Jupiter. Jupiter in this case is part of a grand cross, with Moon, Venus, and Uranus, and has a wide orb conjunction with Chiron--and is in familial Cancer, too. Quite a lot to unpack here.

So, my question for julias is: what does teacher mean to you? What kind of relationship do you want with a teacher? How have you sought these relationships, and in what ways have they failed?

Osamenor said:

Wise and kind older man sounds more like Saturn to me. Which is also a father symbol.

In the OP's case, Pluto is at her MC and is the modern ruler of her MC as well. Traditionally, the MC indicates the mother and the IC the father. In that light, it might mean a difficult relationship with her mother, not her father. Or with both parents: the MC/IC axis is read by some astrologers as simply the parental axis, in which either point can indicate either parent. It might also mean that one or both parents were simply away a lot--perhaps working long hours or distracted by major life issues.

Teacher can also be indicated by Jupiter. Jupiter in this case is part of a grand cross, with Moon, Venus, and Uranus, and has a wide orb conjunction with Chiron--and is in familial Cancer, too. Quite a lot to unpack here.

So, my question for julias is: what does teacher mean to you? What kind of relationship do you want with a teacher? How have you sought these relationships, and in what ways have they failed?

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Hi Osamenor, and others who have replied, thank you so much for the reply.
I would love to understand more about this --> Jupiter in this case is part of a grand cross, with Moon, Venus, and Uranus, and has a wide orb conjunction with Chiron--and is in familial Cancer, too. Quite a lot to unpack here.

In terms of my relationship with teachers, the craving is really to be seen / recognized for something that I'm skilled at and encouraged. I don't, at least in my eyes, have a clear gift or skillset that is easily applied to career or life path, I've always tended toward the esoteric and have sough teachers in yoga, astrology, and other healing modalities. I feel like my energy deters teachers and maybe I come off on a subtle level as desperate / thirsty and so push them away.

Being my own teacher resonates with me as I've gotten that message in many different ways, but I don't know how to do that or where to begin, and I still crave mentorship and someone to tell me that I'm doing the right or wrong thing. I guess I want to be seen / recognized so I dont feel like I'm in my own silo, alone, figuring it all out blindly. Perhaps I need to tap into some kind of inner authority, where would that live in the chart?

As for my parents, I have relatively good relationships with both. I've come to peace with both of them and they have been very supportive and taught me in their own weird ways, but I have their approval / recognition unconditionally and it doesn't help me when it comes to figuring out what I want to spend my time and energy doing & becoming an expert in something.

Thank you Waybread. I appreciate the feedback, I gave a little more info in my reply to Osamenor. Still figuring out replying to this message board Anything else stand out about my chart? I mentioned in the other reply that being my own teacher is a message that I've gotten over and over again but I have such a hard time with self discipline and commitment that it really cripples and kind of consistency with practice that I know will elevate me. Can't seem to find the energy to overcome that.

julias said:

I feel like my energy deters teachers and maybe I come off on a subtle level as desperate / thirsty and so push them away.

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When you push teachers away, how does that play out? Does the teacher decline to work with you anymore? Do you simply stop going to them? Does something else happen?

julias said:

Being my own teacher resonates with me as I've gotten that message in many different ways, but I don't know how to do that or where to begin, and I still crave mentorship and someone to tell me that I'm doing the right or wrong thing. I guess I want to be seen / recognized so I dont feel like I'm in my own silo, alone, figuring it all out blindly. Perhaps I need to tap into some kind of inner authority, where would that live in the chart?

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Maybe you would do well in a situation where there are multiple teachers, not just one. That way, you are receiving the feedback you desire, but it's not dependent on a relationship with one particular person. Or perhaps in a peer study situation, where everyone is both learning and teaching together.

Inner authority is Saturn. So is external authority. You have Saturn sitting right at your ascendant, and domiciled in Capricorn, too. That indicates that you very strongly identify with Saturn and need to be your own authority. You can't have it any other way. For a relationship with a teacher to work for you, the teacher would have to recognize your own internal authority and be willing to simply answer your questions as they come up, suggest lines of study for you, but let you self direct otherwise. A teacher who meets you with that mutual respect could be someone you work well with. If they don't, or if you try to put them above yourself, it won't work.

I suggest multiple teachers or a mutual peer learning situation for you because those methods would eliminate the sense that this one teacher is your authority and you must defer to him/her. They would also facilitate that kind of mutual self authority respect. To further this message, you have Jupiter, planet of teachers, in your sixth house (sixth rules apprentices and apprenticeship) and ruling your eleventh house of groups/friends/peers and your whole sign third, which also suggests peers as well as variety.

julias said:

As for my parents, I have relatively good relationships with both. I've come to peace with both of them and they have been very supportive and taught me in their own weird ways, but I have their approval / recognition unconditionally and it doesn't help me when it comes to figuring out what I want to spend my time and energy doing & becoming an expert in something.

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Come to peace sounds like there was some difficulty in your relationships with your parents initially. Which is yet another way that MC/IC/Pluto-Sun opposition could manifest. Or perhaps--and I didn't think to say this above--it's not so much that you had difficult relationships with your parents as that they had a difficult relationship with each other, which couldn't help but affect you. There are multiple ways that could play out.

julias said:

Hi there, I'm on a long journey to learn astrology but its just so confusing for me, but I'm really dedicating myself to it this year. Its really helpful for me to have people point things out and explain how they got to that conclusion and I was hoping I could post my chart and get some feedback!

Click to expand...

Hello Julia,

first question from my side - you posted your chart with porphyry house system - what is not very common and not much used for a chart reading and insight. Hope you are also open for other insights - as I prefer placidus house system. (A lot of other astrologers do, too)




If you have already been on a long journey to learn astrology you will surely have also noticed, that there different methods and styles available in astrology - including different house system from which an astrologer once chooses his his own - he considers as perfectly and successful working out for him.

I just share mine method of insight with you - what I once found in my long never ending learning journey with astrology - I learned and found proved itself true for me, from my chart and a lot of other chart-readings and feedbacks from chart owners.

julias said:

One thing to not about my personality is that I crave teachers but also feel rejected by teachers and have never had a strong connection with a teacher. Could this have anything to do with my Pluto?

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Pluto rules your 10th house and is your personal perception of the law and authority in general and is your personal perception window of measurement of conventional society standard - and how you experience the outer world in society.

With scorpio in 10th, scorpio lilith on cusp 10th and pluto in 9th - house of teachers you are most focussed on what people's issues are and with which issues they are dealing and fighting with in outer society - you feel compassion with them - as you personally have experienced intense issues yourself as well- in your own childhood and already before your birth - in prenatal period during pregnancy of your mother with you.

Where pluto is placed connected with personal planets - there is always an early intense transforming experience to be found -also combined with the possibility to get others directed, influenced and dominated against own will - what one had to stand and to experience or to witness in a helpless powerless state - mostly in childhood - one subconsciously takes over as right - because of not being yet able to sort out or to sort in correctly in younger years of age.

Your pluto is in 9th house - house of education, university, house of lawyers, house of teachers you can find in your life and teacher you can be for other people. 9th house is ruled by venus- but venus also rules your 4th house - for me mother and mother as first female principle model role- how to be a woman, mother experience in childhood.

How you experience teachers and that you feel rejected by them and never had a strong connection with teachers - but same time crave to find one - reflects and is influenced from your experience with your own mother in childhood. You had to learn early to adapt yourself to her and to function perfectly and to not disturb her too much with your own emotions and needs - in order to protect yourself. Moon rules your 6th house - ability to admit yourself to outer influence and experience - and to continously "work on it".

Venus is in 2nd house - setting boundaries and selfprotection and opposes moon in 8th house - both female principles fighting against each other. Venus sesiquiquadrates pluto - demanding from time to time high standards of perfection on you. Venus also semisquares your sun in 3rd house - taking afterwards influence on your encountering people area as well - with intercepted leo in 7th - where you probably didn't dare to let yourself glow anymore - as moon main rules your 7th house as well.

For me - your father is shown in 5th house -ruled by mercury- male principle how to act in life- first male model role for a man - a woman instinctively looks for a partner with - and father experience in childhood.

Mercury is in your 3rd house and is opposed by scorpio lilith on 10th house cusp and by pluto in 9th cusp 10th- what people outside told about your family was most important for your father and he expected as well high standards of perfection on you to fullfil. Your father took a lot strict and intense influence on your own mental and mind and thoughts (3rd house).

But 3rd house is also house of siblings and sun opposing pluto looks to me like a difficult sibling relationship as well - a sibling who you felt as favored by your father and your mother - because he was male. You got the impression from - that something is wrong with your own body.

Your pisces mars as ruler of 3rd house -siblings- is in 2nd house sitting exact on 2nd house cusp and on 2nd/8th value axis. Neptune as ruler of 2nd house - physical body house is in prenatal house 12th together with uranus - as your co-ruler of 1st house with intercepted aquarius in -and part of your birth energy - both opposing your cancer chiron in 6th house - your inner wound.

I assume that your parents already before your birth would have preferred more to have a boy child than a daughter. Uranus opposes jupiter in your 6th house. And you felt yourself kinda guilty for -with saturn in your 1st house close under ASC - semisquaring mars in 2nd - who is in exact semisextile with your aquarius moonnode in 1st house.

Do you have siblings - Julia ?


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Osamenor, my point was that typically sun opposite Pluto indicates a dysfunctional relationship with the father. I have this aspect natally, and participated on one memorable long thread at Astrodienst where nearly everyone with his aspect said the same thing. The one exception thought Dad was fine, but his relationship with his mother was troubled.

I think this is because the sun gives not only one's individual identity, but is one of the indicators of one's father in traditional astrology. Further, a difficult, undigested Pluto in an opposition to one's sun (the main "me" point in the chart) is apt to show up as "not me," which becomes shadow material-- the split-off bully and ruthless character. Where the child's first experiences are of the parents, this can cross over into other relationships.

In Julia's chart, Pluto makes a number of beneficial aspects, and hopefully they mitigate the sun-Pluto opposition.

The sun rules the self, and hence has a lot to do with one's self-confidence. I wonder whether Julia's dad did not foster her self-confidence, such that she feels the need to look elsewhere for a father-figure.

I'm not suggesting that Julia retrieve unpleasant memories from the past, but her saying she's "made peace with" her parents makes me wonder if she recalls times when she did not feel at peace with them, and what that was about. She doesn't seem to see them as a source of vocational guidance.

Saturn is not such a "kindly" planet, and definitely not kindly traditionally; but it acts more like the stern taskmaster-- who nevertheless teaches us valuable life lessons if we are willing to learn them.

Jupiter is the kindly figure who, because of his link to higher education, can function more as a mentor. As we've noted, with Jupiter conjunct Chiron, there is some wounding in this process.

Julia-- with Saturn conjunct your ascendant (another major "me" point in the chart) you may feel that there is something lacking, or not quite good-enough about you. Of course, you are perfectly fine, but you might have trouble experiencing yourself that way. This makes it only natural that you would look outside yourself for teachers and answers.

But your north node of personal growth is in independent, futuristic Aquarius in your first house. This makes me think that precisely your life challenge is to become your own mentor-- even not knowing how that is to be achieved. It will come from your learning to listen to yourself, and to see what it is in life that pulls you towards it.

Your north node squares your stability-loving Mercury-sun in Taurus , so you are asked to step way outside your comfort zone.

The answers you seek are within you.

And that's a very good place for them to be.

Thanks so much Osamenor.

In terms of the teacher dynamics, its really more of an internal process and never anything so dramatic as someone's declined to work with me. Its really more that I feel like this is something I really want and every time I try its a dead end. But everything else you said makes sense and I think its just something I need to re-frame the way I look at now that I know this.

In terms of my parents, I have a relatively good relationship with both of them, but I have had to overcome some tension with my father. He is a talented creative that didn't ever achieve his potential success or recognition and gave up shortly after I was born. He is a scorpio and had very intense opinions and has trouble reading the room, and so it took me a while to reckon with the way he communicates socially, but I've come to accept him as he is, even though there are definitely still issues. I'd say that my parents also have a complicated relationship to eachother, so in terms of role models for my own romantic partnerships, not the best, and I do have blocks when it comes to love.

Thank you for your response!!!!

Osamenor said:

When you push teachers away, how does that play out? Does the teacher decline to work with you anymore? Do you simply stop going to them? Does something else happen?

Come to peace sounds like there was some difficulty in your relationships with your parents initially. Which is yet another way that MC/IC/Pluto-Sun opposition could manifest. Or perhaps--and I didn't think to say this above--it's not so much that you had difficult relationships with your parents as that they had a difficult relationship with each other, which couldn't help but affect you. There are multiple ways that could play out.

Click to expand...

Hi Waybread, thank you! This really resonated with me and helped a few things click. I also replied to Osamenor about more details on my relationship with parents and definitely some tensions with my dad. I always looked up to him because he was so talented artistically and I have my own creative aspirations, but I haven't found my creative outlet. My brother is a very talented songwriter and while my dad praised me in many ways, he definitely didn't instill creative confidence in me in the same way he maybe did for my brother.

I am absolutely struggling with the not good enough paradigm. I have this pressure to have things come out perfectly so if I know that wont happen, I don't even try. Its so annoying and something I'm trying to curb because it leads to a lot of inaction because of fear that the outcome just wont be good enough.

I hear you on the Aquarius north node, and my comfort zone is so strong and magnetic it really is hard to step out of for me. But this is something I've been thinking about and obviously part of a process. This is all so helpful to have this reinforced through astrology and all of your thoughtful interpretations.

It is very much appreciated.

waybread said:

Osamenor, my point was that typically sun opposite Pluto indicates a dysfunctional relationship with the father. I have this aspect natally, and participated on one memorable long thread at Astrodienst where nearly everyone with his aspect said the same thing. The one exception thought Dad was fine, but his relationship with his mother was troubled.

I think this is because the sun gives not only one's individual identity, but is one of the indicators of one's father in traditional astrology. Further, a difficult, undigested Pluto in an opposition to one's sun (the main "me" point in the chart) is apt to show up as "not me," which becomes shadow material-- the split-off bully and ruthless character. Where the child's first experiences are of the parents, this can cross over into other relationships.

In Julia's chart, Pluto makes a number of beneficial aspects, and hopefully they mitigate the sun-Pluto opposition.

The sun rules the self, and hence has a lot to do with one's self-confidence. I wonder whether Julia's dad did not foster her self-confidence, such that she feels the need to look elsewhere for a father-figure.

I'm not suggesting that Julia retrieve unpleasant memories from the past, but her saying she's "made peace with" her parents makes me wonder if she recalls times when she did not feel at peace with them, and what that was about. She doesn't seem to see them as a source of vocational guidance.

Saturn is not such a "kindly" planet, and definitely not kindly traditionally; but it acts more like the stern taskmaster-- who nevertheless teaches us valuable life lessons if we are willing to learn them.

Jupiter is the kindly figure who, because of his link to higher education, can function more as a mentor. As we've noted, with Jupiter conjunct Chiron, there is some wounding in this process.

Julia-- with Saturn conjunct your ascendant (another major "me" point in the chart) you may feel that there is something lacking, or not quite good-enough about you. Of course, you are perfectly fine, but you might have trouble experiencing yourself that way. This makes it only natural that you would look outside yourself for teachers and answers.

But your north node of personal growth is in independent, futuristic Aquarius in your first house. This makes me think that precisely your life challenge is to become your own mentor-- even not knowing how that is to be achieved. It will come from your learning to listen to yourself, and to see what it is in life that pulls you towards it.

Your north node squares your stability-loving Mercury-sun in Taurus , so you are asked to step way outside your comfort zone.

The answers you seek are within you.

And that's a very good place for them to be.

Click to expand...

Hi Zora, thank you so much for your reply. Lots to unpack.

I would say my mother relationship wasn't strained and I have a very good loving relationship with her. She tells me that as a kid I was really independent and never wanted help with anything and always knew exactly what I wanted. I replied to some of the other posts about my father relationship which was a little more challenging more because of his personality. But we do have a very loving relationship and I really appreciate him as a human, father, and artist. I actually dated someone really similar to my dad and now I am seeking a partner who is the opposite in many ways because I want a different experience of relationship than I see in what my parents have.

I have a brother and he is younger. He is probably the more 'problem child' of the two of us and him and my father dont get along, and they are extremely similar.

I would like a closer relationship with my brother but right now we are not very close. He kind of brings out a very short and snappy ungraceful and impatient side of me a lot of the time.