Me vs Father, communication problems.

Fireboy

Well-known member
jj.jpg vs ch.jpg

Here we see two birth charts,mine and opposite my Father's birth chart.Its a difficult communication,he is adjectival,pressing,cold up on me,we dissent many times,wants impose to me.From my side,i afraid of him and the way of talking,thinking,sometimes makes me feel that he wants me to get out of home,he affects me negative,i can't feel free in my enviroment.It's a restriction,there are times he talks to me with a deprecatory way & humiliates me.



What the comparison show us,where do you locate the main problem to agree and communicate,what he wants to be more friendly or sentimental with me,our relationship tends to become completely typical,are there any chances for improvement in the future?
 
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ashriia

Well-known member
My guess it's due to your Sun square Neptune. You can't really change a person, regardless of how much you want them to change.

Carve your own path in life maybe in time he will come around to appreciate you more once you are apart from him.. youre in your mid 20's. make your own enviroment away from anyone you feel is holding you back. Your living situation seems toxic to your well being.

I have sun square saturn.. always had lack of rapport with my own father. then i moved 3,000 miles away. and things have gotten better since then. still not great communication... but it's the better than it was.

can't say if things will get better in your relationship with him in future.. because i'm still learning how to interpret relational charts.
good luck.
 

Fireboy

Well-known member
I just want to know where are our differences and why we disagree so often even in simple talks,we seriously have problems in our communication and that's bad because he affects my beliefs and thoughts.I hadn't done things i would like to do in the past because of him and the fear of what he will say or react.
 
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Fireboy

Well-known member
Can you compare the two birth charts and tell me where are our problems and differences?And if there is emotional connection between us,i don't feel much for him i think.:sad::unsure:
 

ashriia

Well-known member
I'll give this a go again since no one else has responded and your still asking.. why you don't get along.

(this is just my novice interpretation, if i am wrong, i welcome corrections..)

He looks incredibly difficult to get along with...that is just my observation his contacts which are squares from the 10th to the 4th show alot of tension. Your mercury ruler of both your sun and asc are square neptune in the 4th. this to me, seems like problems communicating at home. Especially with the feelings stuff in the home. and problems communicating in general as your chiron is in gemini (mercury ruled). and gemini's love to communicate and that is where your cosmic 'band-aid' is.

I mean no offense by this... I am just reminded of people who get trapped in abusive cycles with other people. They try so desperately to get along. Waiting for that one good day that will erase all the bad days.. Or just keep trying to understand... What can't be understood. Some people just don't get along. And sometimes people might be hateful and abusive because that is how they are. There is nothing to figure out or understand. It just is.

your fate is in your hands.


I hope you will take care of yourself first. devise a plan for yourself to leave the home.

anyway, best of luck.
 
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kimbermoon

Well-known member
Now that Saturn has entered Scorpio, I would suggest that the problems with your father are apt to get more intense over the coming months: Saturn often symbolizes set-backs and conflicts. The third house relates to communications in general and here we find Pluto and Venus in your chart: potential power struggles and efforts by others to control. You also have the Moon [emotions, and the past] afflicted by Saturn [father] in the natal chart; with Saturn in the 4th house, relating to the 'parental influence'.
Its a difficult communication,he is adjectival,pressing,cold up on me,we dissent many times,wants impose to me. From my side,i afraid of him and the way of talking,thinking,sometimes makes me feel that he wants me to get out of home,he affects me negative,i can't feel free in my enviroment. It's a restriction,there are times he talks to me with a deprecatory way & humiliates me. Also natal Sun square Uranus is separative in nature, often undermining a person's sense of freedom and autonomy. I would suggest caution with the upcoming Full Moon on October 29, as there could be a threat to your physical/material security: this full moon will be in affliction to natal Pluto/Venus: you would be advised to avoid all communication at that time especially, as it could erupt in possible violence and an assertion of power on his part. Also Uranus is now in your 8th house of 'deep psychological changes' and this energy will persist through the next 7 years. This will be an energy encouraging you to assert your independence, freedom and autonomy, suggesting a likely necessity of moving out and away from the stranglehold he seems to have over you. When one person stops playing into the drama, the problem will often disappear. You would also be cautioned to be attentive in order to avoid deception in the matter, which would only add further intensity to the problem. Your choice is either to remove yourself from the scenario, or spend the next 2 years struggling towards an inevitable outcome that is likely to demand estrangement. It sounds very much like you are being bullied, and you must find ways to overcome your fears in order to move on. This would be my take on the situation.​
 

Fireboy

Well-known member
Now that Saturn has entered Scorpio, I would suggest that the problems with your father are apt to get more intense over the coming months.

I'll try to keep my mouth closed and not to come in juxtaposition with him.It's the only way this moment to avoid his influence upon me.I don't want to make things worse right now.I need silence and clear mind to think my next moves to solve this problem causing me this man.


Also Uranus is now in your 8th house of 'deep psychological changes' and this energy will persist through the next 7 years.

I suppose these psychological changes will come the sooner,the independence will affect me to feel free in my own way.I'm searching for deliverance from his negative enviroment.

Can you explain me how you see our relationship/communication for next years,is there any hope or will continue as it is now?:annoyed: I mean where do you see in our charts the main problem,where are the conflicts?


It sounds very much like you are being bullied, and you must find ways to overcome your fears in order to move on. This would be my take on the situation.

Exactly,these fears are killing the progress of me.
 
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kimbermoon

Well-known member
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]With Moon in Capricorn today, meeting up with the transiting Pluto, it may be difficult to avoid confrontations: better to remove yourself from the situation. [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]With Uranus opposing your mercury in the coming months, prepare for unpredictability and sudden changes. This speaks to the challenges relating to [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]autonomy and independence.[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif] In your father's chart we see afflictions relating to his 'parenting capabilities': his problems come from within himself, and he must heal from many afflicting [polarizing] energies. This is not about you, per say; we can only look to your chart to see how the conflicts affect you. Rebellion is a big part of the conflict, and only you can break free from your father's obsession with trying to oppress and control you. Such control issues often come from a sense of inferiority on the part of the perpetrator. In about 2 years you will be under your Saturn Return and this is apt to be the tipping point. Pluto must be your champion now, as you begin to clear away the dross that limits your own journey: Pluto relates to empowerment, or it's opposite, [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]disempowerment.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]If you think you might be able to change him, you are apt to be mistaken; you can only really change yourself. [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Another theme I see playing out here is the lesson of [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]detachment. [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Sometimes separation from negativity is the only answer. [/FONT][/FONT]
 

Fireboy

Well-known member
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]With Uranus opposing your mercury in the coming months, prepare for unpredictability and sudden changes. This speaks to the challenges relating to [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]autonomy and independence.[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, serif] In your father's chart we see afflictions relating to his 'parenting capabilities': his problems come from within himself, and he must heal from many afflicting [polarizing] energies.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]

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What kind of changes could be that? Still he has the same attitude and it's kind dissapointing all this situation.I would like to know what could make him a little more happier.[/FONT]
Next months coming i see will have again conflicts and pressure from him,he wants to change me as a person,this is simply impossible,i don't think i will let him humiliate me anymore,my reaction will be stronger next time,whatever that means.



[FONT=Verdana, sans-serif][FONT=Times New Roman, serif]
In about 2 years you will be under your Saturn Return and this is apt to be the tipping point. Pluto must be your champion now, as you begin to clear away the dross that limits your own journey: Pluto relates to empowerment, or it's opposite,
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I hope for emprowerment for sure and not the opposite..What to do you see for 2013 to our charts,it will be a tough year?I have fears this behavior will not have a good evolution...
 
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capleo2scorpio

Well-known member
First look at the charts, I would have thought you and your father would be getting along well, since you both think alike, having mercury in libra. Closer inspection shows that your mars is in capricorn, his mars in pisces. Mars in a guy's chart to me indicate the males you get along with. You have to use emotional tactics with mars in water signs. Try to be a comedian to your dad, praise him how a good father and inspirational he is, always say good things about him to other people in his company. You have to appeal to his emotions in a manly way since his mars and moon both in pisces. You need to subtly change yourself around him to present a top notch son. I think deep down he distances himself and try to control you because you aredoing or want to do things that he always wanted to but feared. Your objective is to be his best buddy.
 
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