Self worth

Ok so I finally decided to ask this question. I want to clarify if im right in my opinion or if anyone else can educate me in the field.

I want to know if I have a high self worth or low self worth and whether that can really be determined in the chart. I ask this because everyone has different values in life and some flow more easily and harmoniously than others. But when it comes to high self worth, as an example, could that mean that the placement of the asc would be most favourable in the 1st house of the self or 2nd house of values. Or a good alignment with asc ruler and 2nd house ruler, including dignities?

In my chart, my 5th house ruler (kids) are in my 2nd house. I cant stress how much I value them, and children, more than anything in this world. They are most important to me. My second house ruler is Jupiter in sag in 1st house. I take it this means me valuing my body as a means to get places. This is partly true, but as im older I know it wont last so I see this as a pointless form of self worth.

Venus, which rules values is in virgo, 11th house, is conjunct mars (traditional ruler of asc and ruler of 6th house), venus sextiles pluto (asc ruler, me), and venus trines the kids, Neptune. Now, in my opinion with the life I lead, this is accurate with my values in a sense that I feel more confident and proud when I have my kids with me. I feel like a success, like ive accomplished the greatest thing in the world. It's very important for me to rebel as the health freak I am and stand up for the nurturing and value of the delicate stomach (a virgo thing) and health as a whole. I value health. Without health, you have nothing. Venus is prominent at the top of the chart.

But what does it say about my own self worth. Do I have a high or low self worth? Im confused. Because when it comes to my own relationships, I end up being used and having to sacrifice (all 12th house matters) because of other people's mess ups. I might meet other people who say they would never put up with the situations in relationships that I do, but when it comes to reaching one's goals and the values I have, I have to sacrifice to reach them. Does that mean I have no respect for myself?

Self-worth is usually seen by 2nd house - and is typically manifested by house ruler, aspects of ruler to planets and planets contained within. It's what leads us to develop and gather things and people that we value, hence, showing us what our values are in the world - what we value within ourselves.

You have Jupiter ruling 2nd - and Jupiter is wedged between Uranus and Moon in your 1st house - so yes, I do think you have a good sense of your self-worth and you value it highly. The rub is that Moon-Uranus can cause erratic emotions and reactions to self-identity and Jupiter can expand them - so it is not surprising that you find your self-worth alternating.

Neptune in 2nd can cloud your self-worth - and by square (out of sign square) to Mercury in 11th - it can be easy to doubt yourself, especially among people you value or admire - this may give you the sense of sacrificing your values for greater good of others leaves you with less.

Libra on cusp of 12th - Venus on cusp of 10th and book-ending MC with conjunction to Mars - this can be a source of your stress if you are not finding yourself to express your worth to the world at large. Mars rules 6th - gut - so the core of your body is greatly affected by your position in life.

As well, you have a strong 12th house - so it follows that retreat into that self-sacrificial place is like a calling - especially with Sun and Saturn there. Pluto there to constantly remind you that you have to dig deeper into yourself.

It might very well be that your 'calling' is to put others needs before you - but that means that you have to realize /internatlize that you can only be as good for them as you are good for yourself, but not to point of sacrificing your needs or worth for others.

I think that learning/practicing when to say no and yes - knowing which circumstances to give to and not to give to and most importantly - asking yourself before you give/sacrifice - is this damaging to me or is this good for me? which means really knowing who you are and not letting others define you by what you do for them. In this respect - it truly is about listening to your gut.

Well Kitchy that was awesome thank you.

So my understanding of what you said is that I do have a high self worth, but my 12th house lets me down. You were saying that I need to learn when to say no and when to stop self sacrificing. Unfortunately the strength for that seems to come when planets transit the 1st house or 10th house (in harmonious aspect to 12th house planets). The last few years the cardinal squares as well as Saturn have irritated this house, making my life dangerous without provocation with abuse and no way out. Everyone picked on me and no matter what I said, ppl responded with the most unjust, abusive actions and words. I had to give in because I just didn't win anything. I lost every battle. Anyway, my point is that you made me realise the 12th house is the real let down. But I guess I can only work with the transits. And Neptune square mercury deludes the whole situation. You are right. Neptune and the 12th house cloud my judgement and belief which effects my self esteem. Esp. when others try to tell me im something im not and then I start to doubt myself because im disillusional.

What do you mean about this exactly -

"Libra on cusp of 12th - Venus on cusp of 10th and book-ending MC with conjunction to Mars - this can be a source of your stress if you are not finding yourself to express your worth to the world at large."

Are you saying I need to express my venus in virgo 11th house (standing up for health rights etc) more.

What if the 2nd lord were in the 2nd house, Venus?

Abby83 said:

What do you mean about this exactly -

"Libra on cusp of 12th - Venus on cusp of 10th and book-ending MC with conjunction to Mars - this can be a source of your stress if you are not finding yourself to express your worth to the world at large."

Are you saying I need to express my venus in virgo 11th house (standing up for health rights etc) more.

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I believe it means exactly that - standing up for yourself, period. Venus doesn't like conflicts/confrontations/dis-ease - it wants to go harmoniously with the flow of whatever is flowing. There is such a strange correlation between Libra and Pisces in this idea - both are willing to give in rather than confront, because the discomfort of conflict is too much for their preferred spirits. However, Libra has an ability, after much deliberation, to take a stand - but often after everyone else has moved on or away from the matter.

I think your sun ruled 10th with Neptune in 2nd - public image, self worth are very much tied into your Venus ruled 12th.

Wallflower or Wildflower kind of stuff. Where do you find the most growth in your life?

You have been given some great input about your question: if I might just add a bit more for your consideration.

The pattern of your planetary lay-out is quite telling as well, with all the emphasis to the eastern horizon. This can be suggestive of someone who is very involved with the evolution of the Self; more reliant on yourself than on being reliant on others for your own growth. You may be more of a teacher to others, rather than a student, especially in the later years.

Yes Venus is about values, but it also relates to our 'expectations' in life, and very often our expectations come in many different forms. You may not always get what you want in life, but often you will get what you truly need.
Perhaps for you the underlying issue is more about your expectations in life, rather than a matter of self-esteem.

Venus in Virgo is indeed prominent in the chart, giving evidence to your dedication and devotion towards children and partners. I suspect you are apt to be more of a giver, than a taker in life; Venus/Neptune shows your willingness to sacrifice for others.

In my own work I always factor in the aspects of a given planet for better clarification; this shows whether the sign influence will be expressed easily or with greater difficulty.
In my own youth I suffered from very low self-esteem, in social matters especially, due to Venus/Leo being squared to Saturn ..as well as having a heavy dominance of water influence in my chart.

For you, that hyper-sensitivity of water though, is buoyed up by your dominant Fire/Air input. Plus Venus is more receptive to Saturn/Pluto for you. With Venus square Jupiter/Uranus though, that is where doubt and insecurity can creep in. You may well hold expanded ideals about love, but in turn that can affect your judgment [Jupiter] making you subject to sudden and unexpected changes of relationships [Uranus- instability]. Thus I might suggest that while you may judge yourself rather harshly, and thus cause you to question your sense of self-esteem, you are apt to swing the other way in your judgments of others. I say, why question it, so long as you feel confident and pleased with your own accomplishments. Now that you are past your Saturn return, it is now the time for reclaiming your own Identity 'as you see fit' not according to what others might think.

Abby - no wonder I confused you -

In revisiting this chart - I realized I confused a few things by view position of the houses - though my thoughts remain the same in essence where 12th house and placement of ruler of 12th are concerned.

Sun rules 10th house the world at large as you are seen in it and the venus/mars conjunct bookends the 11th - the greater good - and those who you want to do greater good for.

The essence of my reading is based on your 2nd /12th - it's rulers, planets contained, and their inter-relations. Please forgive me my current neptune-neptune transits, which directly effect my natal mercury, for this befuddlement!

But again - knowing when you are sacrificing yourself for the benefit of others - knowing when you are sacrificing yourself to the detriment of yourself - and the fortitude to know the difference and stand strong with it - are key factors I see in your chart.

I'll respond properly later in the day when the kids don't occupy me. But I will say this quickly just off the top of my head.

Kitchy, you said something about Uranus and moon shaking up my self worth. Yes, these two planets represent the very people in my life the last few years who have in their own way rejected me and my family and beliefs and value (pretty much everything) whilst cleverly belittling me, abusing me, and criticising me and complimenting themselves in competition. I am so sick of them thinking they are mosre important than anyone. Nothing is good enough. I actually do a lot of hard work as a mother looking after 3 toddlers and they still only talk badly about me and put me in a bad light to everyone around me. So for example they will imply I'm a bad person because I don't have 4 children, so I don't really know what motherhood is. Or that I'm lazy because I don't make money... because I'm looking after kids. Stupid stuff like that. Fighting back is a tricky one because when they get a reaction, they keep it up. I think I'm finding ways around it though. I know for sure they absolutely hate healthy ppl because they are not into anything healthy at all. That's something I have that they don't.

The thing about that venus in virgo is that I HAVE to work hard to get what I want. At any stage in my life where I have thought I can be more receptive and let things fall into place, it has never worked out and ppl took the opportunity to overpower me and send me to my grave. I know now that I can never fall back and must always keep myself in a powerful position to protect myself. The Uranus and moon ppl are vultures just waiting for a weakness for them to expand. I'm started to criticise them now, and they don't like it!

Kimbermoon I definitely agree with what you say.

And yes, water is a sensitive area for me. The most sensitive is when a planet enters the first degrees of pisces. It messes a lot of things up. But as usual things get better later.

Kitchy -

Where do I find the most growth in life?

a) I am a good student and love to study. But not my destiny for higher learning. I seem to do best with 5th house areas. So the playful side of life. Finding work that is fun. Primary schools and early education. Children and play with children. And playful sex. Doing easy fun playful things that I don't take too serious. I seem to have the life where if I stay too focused on obtaining a career out of something, it backfires in some way. I excel in health matters.

So to sum it all up, if I do all the things I value, my self worth will be nurtured. And when it comes to those a holes, I need to bite back and give myself positive affirmation.

Thank you all so much for your advice. The information has extended my knowledge and helped me out greatly. I really needed this and appreciate it. Thanks.

Kitchy - I don't mean to be a pain, but I just read this bit that you wrote.

"Wallflower or Wildflower kind of stuff."

I will admit that I start off as a nice person when I meet ppl until I am proven the need to be a cow. And like you said, by then, ppl have moved onto other things. Is that what you were referring to? In that sense then I will try to stand up for myself on the spot. Problem is I usually take a day before I realise the other person was inappropriate, which then makes them think they can escalate.

Kimbermoon -

You said "Plus Venus is more receptive to Saturn/Pluto for you."

So Neptune venus aspects indicate self sacrificing themes. Can you please tell me your opinion on what the venus Saturn/pluto aspect would mean for my self worth?

Pluto in 12th has the ability to really delve into the fear of hiding under a bushel, but it also has potential for great hidden manipulation and power trips with others - so finding the balance of protection of self while not seeing oneself as a victim is the fine line.

The wallflower hides, the wildflower can grow and blooms in the most harsh and unimagined environments.

Kitchy said:

Pluto in 12th has the ability to really delve into the fear of hiding under a bushel, but it also has potential for great hidden manipulation and power trips with others - so finding the balance of protection of self while not seeing oneself as a victim is the fine line.

The wallflower hides, the wildflower can grow and blooms in the most harsh and unimagined environments.

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Well then, ill take the wildflower thanks . Ahhh. Im so happy for your help Kitchy. Really am. Im so in need to rebel right now.

Gee there's so much about the self here. I really have to protect myself. But the best way is obviously to go ahead and be me and not give a f about whether others like it or not. I need to stop apologising for being me. After all, I accept other ppl for who they are.

I believe that the reception between Venus-Saturn/Pluto denotes the potential for improvement and growth of your personal sense of self-esteem, over time. Saturn represents the 'maturing process' and Pluto holds the promise of important Soul Growth; it suggests a strong karmic theme that you will resolve through retreat and sanctuary, and that theme is about lessons of love, as in learning to love and accept yourself before understanding the true nature of loving others.
I suspect you could find your calling through doing important social work for others [Chiron and NN in the 7th] that will aid in their healing, as well as your own. This would appear to be backed up by Mercury, as ruler of Virgo, found in the 11th h as well.
As previously mentioned the planetary lay-out is also quite telling, not to mention the Venus/Mars/Neptune, denoting inspiration and spirituality and the Higher aspects of love.

kimbermoon said:

I believe that the reception between Venus-Saturn/Pluto denotes the potential for improvement and growth of your personal sense of self-esteem, over time. Saturn represents the 'maturing process' and Pluto holds the promise of important Soul Growth; it suggests a strong karmic theme that you will resolve through retreat and sanctuary, and that theme is about lessons of love, as in learning to love and accept yourself before understanding the true nature of loving others.
I suspect you could find your calling through doing important social work for others [Chiron and NN in the 7th] that will aid in their healing, as well as your own. This would appear to be backed up by Mercury, as ruler of Virgo, found in the 11th h as well.
As previously mentioned the planetary lay-out is also quite telling, not to mention the Venus/Mars/Neptune, denoting inspiration and spirituality and the Higher aspects of love.

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Thank you kimbermoon. I agree with what you say.

So is it safe to say that there is no such thing as one person having a higher self worth than the other and that everyone is going to have different values that are more important to them? I say this because the thing that is most on my mind is people who value themselves more than anything. Those kinds of people grind my gears. I absolutely hate ppl who think they are more important than anything else because to me, children are most important. I mean of course you need to look after yourself, but if you have that under control (which in most cases isn't that hard), then children are number 1 priority. I mean an adult has total power over the development and successive outcome of the child. It is the most powerful position one can have. Yet ppl abuse that power time and time again. And I feel like there's no room for ppl like that on this planet and would quite happily dig their grave for them.
So part of me thinks that it's just a matter of having different values, but another part of me realises the power in being a parent, raising kids to your best ability and giving them the best life you can. To me, that is more successful than a parent rejecting a child because they value themselves more. So this is where im coming from. I think I just answered my question. I know that some adults have it tough and cant look after their kids and are weak, but in my opinion I think adults are in a stronger position than kids. There's so many options when it comes to crisis. Kids don't need to be sacrificed. So yeah, the value of a parent and how he/she raises the child is far more powerful.
I wish I could understand why certain ppl reject children or grandchildren who do not look like or take after them. I love all children and also love to put bullies in place.

Either way, thank you for helping me realise this all.