Synastry questions

A

ALH0006

Member
Backstory: The inner chart is mine, the outer is my ex fiance's. I was with him for eight years and we broke up two years ago. The first few years of the relationship were almost dreamlike. We sort of stopped doing much besides each other. Both of us wound up feeling like we had somehow lost ourselves and it was the other person's fault. There was a lot of idolization and demonization that went on after the first bfew years. I left him because it felt like it had become necessary but it was a slow split and very difficult for both of us. I have had a couple of relationships since but he refuses to date anyone. He's a good looking musician who gets plenty of offers. He just won't.

We still talk every few weeks and sometimes a few days in a row. Like now. Each time I start to think that maybe we could work it out he throws a massive insulting tantrum that I don't want him and I stop talking to him for awhile. It's gotten ridiculous.

A year ago I did take him back for two weeks and he told me three times that life was better without me so I left him again. It wasn't a day before he was whining that he didn't have me around. He always contacts me first.

The thing is that we get along great (it actually took us three years to get into our first fight) We have similar oddball interests and great conversations, but then he'll do **** like remember to get mad about the past in the middle of a laugh. It's jarring and disturbing.

What I want to know is what in our synastry suggests these dramatic cycles and tendencies to jump from a sense that the other person is the best to the worst. Also, why this prolonged fascination?

https://imageshack.us/my/images

 
Last edited:
Z

zipadee

Well-known member
Hi ALH0006,

I am by no means a professional at this, so take my contribution with a grain of salt.

The first thing I notice is you both natally have pluto opposite moon, so those passionate, discordant emotions are already a part of both of your personalities. Astrology king describes it as "extremes of emotion and behavior."

https://astrologyking.com/moon-opposite-pluto/

You also both happen to have this as a major, relatively close aspect to each other in synastry as well. My guess would be that since you both have that aspect natally, it may be easy to relate to each other's emotional wave lengths, but at the same time each of you trigger the other person's "extremes of emotion." So although you can relate easily, a simple conversation could turn on a dime.

Whoever has their moon conjunct mars is probably has a particularly passionate nature.
https://astrologyking.com/moon-conjunct-mars/

You also have venus square pluto (and moon), so all in all, this is looking to be quite the intense relationship, though don't take all of this as negative because many astrologers say that venus/pluto type aspects can be quite good for keeping the passion throughout the relationship.

Also, venus square the nodal axis can be good, I hear mixed reviews on squares to the nodes but this page has a better bent:

https://starscopestoday.com/2012/11/09/marriage-indicators-in-synastry/

Sun opposite Saturn, Neptune conjunction could be good for going the long haul, as Saturn is commitment and responsibility. On the flip side though, sun opp sat can mean that your relationship is also kinda bogged down by responsibilities. There could be an air of tenseness in the relationship caused by the responsibilities presented by the Saturn person to the sun person. Also Neptune can put a mystical air behind things, with time the mist dissolves into reality.

"When the Sun person is in opposition to the Saturn person you may find the time you spend together is more restrictive than you desire and planned activities lack much of the fun that you expected. Good times seem to keep getting put off to later, while duties and obligations pile up."

https://astromatrix.org/Horoscopes/Synastry-Aspects/Sun-Opposition-Saturn

https://illumeastrology.blogspot.com/2013/12/synastrysaturn-square-or-opposite-sun.html

All in all, as I am not a seasoned professional astrologer, I can't tell you whether you should continue or not. But it looks like the back-and-forth emotional facet of the relationship is kind of part of the way you guys will deal with your emotions for each other. It sounds like a deep, hot but also heavy relationship.

So you have to weigh things on your own, best of luck.

zipadee
 
A

ALH0006

Member
zipadee said:
Hi ALH0006,

I am by no means a professional at this, so take my contribution with a grain of salt.

The first thing I notice is you both natally have pluto opposite moon, so those passionate, discordant emotions are already a part of both of your personalities. Astrology king describes it as "extremes of emotion and behavior."

https://astrologyking.com/moon-opposite-pluto/

You also both happen to have this as a major, relatively close aspect to each other in synastry as well. My guess would be that since you both have that aspect natally, it may be easy to relate to each other's emotional wave lengths, but at the same time each of you trigger the other person's "extremes of emotion." So although you can relate easily, a simple conversation could turn on a dime.

Whoever has their moon conjunct mars is probably has a particularly passionate nature.
https://astrologyking.com/moon-conjunct-mars/

You also have venus square pluto (and moon), so all in all, this is looking to be quite the intense relationship, though don't take all of this as negative because many astrologers say that venus/pluto type aspects can be quite good for keeping the passion throughout the relationship.

Also, venus square the nodal axis can be good, I hear mixed reviews on squares to the nodes but this page has a better bent:

https://starscopestoday.com/2012/11/09/marriage-indicators-in-synastry/

Sun opposite Saturn, Neptune conjunction could be good for going the long haul, as Saturn is commitment and responsibility. On the flip side though, sun opp sat can mean that your relationship is also kinda bogged down by responsibilities. There could be an air of tenseness in the relationship caused by the responsibilities presented by the Saturn person to the sun person. Also Neptune can put a mystical air behind things, with time the mist dissolves into reality.

"When the Sun person is in opposition to the Saturn person you may find the time you spend together is more restrictive than you desire and planned activities lack much of the fun that you expected. Good times seem to keep getting put off to later, while duties and obligations pile up."

https://astromatrix.org/Horoscopes/Synastry-Aspects/Sun-Opposition-Saturn

https://illumeastrology.blogspot.com/2013/12/synastrysaturn-square-or-opposite-sun.html

All in all, as I am not a seasoned professional astrologer, I can't tell you whether you should continue or not. But it looks like the back-and-forth emotional facet of the relationship is kind of part of the way you guys will deal with your emotions for each other. It sounds like a deep, hot but also heavy relationship.

So you have to weigh things on your own, best of luck.

zipadee
Click to expand...

Zipadee, thank you for the insight. That part about responsibilities piling up really struck a chord. One of the major issues we have had is his needing to take care of his parents and my taking on a lot of that myself. His mother was dying of cancer when we got together and a month after I left him his father was diagnosed with the same cancer and that's part of what initially pulled us back because I couldn't completely make him face it on his own. So much energy pouring in that direction ruined us financially and that put strain on as well. I think he kind of snapped a bit and developed a bit more bite once his mother passed and when that didn't go away after a few years... I did. It didn't help that he had some unresolved issues with her that he ignored because of her situation and apparently, according to his Dad, I am a lot like his Mom was before she got sick. (I wonder if that has something to do with both me and him having the moon in Taurus)
 
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