Does my long-time crush like me back?

Becca

Well-known member
When I was a teenager, back in the summer of 1999, I had a crush on a guy I was never officially introduced to. I thought it was just a crush, and that it would pass. (Un)fortunately, it hasn't.
At first, I would only see him walking around downtown with a friend. He never hit on me. I found out his name, age, address, etc. Then I was in a long term relationship, but every time I saw him, I liked what I saw, and every time I wasn't content with my relationship I would daydream of being with him instead. From 2006. to 2013. I only saw him occasionally, in the streets.
Then, in late 2012. and in 2013. I saw him many times, even in bars, BUT I was with my boyfriend almost each time.
I haven't seen him for a year. Anyhow, I keep on thinking about him and what it would be like to know him, to be with him. I wonder what he's like and if he's the one. I don't know if the feelings and illusions I've created around him are only signs that I'm not happy with my boyfriend or that maybe I should try to be with him. These daydreams and feelings haunt me.
There used to be times when I saw him and felt as if I had been hit by lightning. I would get nervous around him, sometimes even unable to look at him.
Sometimes I go and look at his Youtube playlist, listen to some of the songs he likes. I know his google+ page and his skype id too. Sometimes I feel like writing to him, but I've no idea what I would say, so I keep on daydreaming. He's like a drug I can't get off or a curse that's been cast to me. I don't know what to do. I don't want to be 45 or 60 and still have these feelings while I am married to someone else or to stay single just because I might meet him someday.

I would like to know if he likes me back, if he'd be with me if he could.
I'm adding a horary here (I don't know if it can help since I would be much more focused on the question if I have just seen him. Now I'm in the state of melancholy, bored inside while cruel fast wind is blowing outside), and I'm also adding my natal and his natal without the time of birth since I don't know it.

You can see Venus opposite Neptun in my natal. Maybe that's making me obsess about greener pastures. Several years ago I was inspired to learn a foreign language just because it's his father's first language. I daydreamed about meeting his father and taking to him in that language. Ironically, his father died almost 2 years ago, so there's no way of impressing him now. There are also some songs that always make me think of him. I most often imagine us being in his white house, near a fireplace, and also, making coffee together in the morning.
 

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Dirius

Well-known member
I'm answering the horary chart only here:

I don't even think you yourself like him at this point.

Ok so, in this case:

you = sun (ruler of 1st) and moon
him = saturn (ruler of 7th)

Now lets look at you. Sun conjunction mercury.....I assume thats your boyfriend.

The sun is in sagittarius, detriment of mercury. You are clearly NOT happy with your boyfriend. But mercury is also in its own detriment. He is clearly NOT good himself.

Something is happening to your boyfriend, and affecting him and his relationship to you.

Now as for the guy you are asking about, he is saturn, yet I don't see any kind of reception or aspect between saturn and sun. Only an opposition with the moon many degrees away.

The moon itself, its in taurus, its own exaltation. Perhaps this is what you are doing, making fantasies just to escape your own reality??

But there is more...there is this jupiter placed in the 1st, mutual reception with the sun.

Is it possible that you actually like another guy you are not mentioning? Or perhaps that jupiter represents...something else. Jupiter rules the 5th, perhaps the mutual reception with the sun indicates what you are currently lacking in your relationship.

You want a child? or perhaps its a sexual issue (as in you and your boyfriend are not being intimate)? or perhaps jupiter represents another guy?

Or even jupiter can represent the sexual fantasy, as ruler of 5th, for this guy. Not sure.

I take it that the exalted moon is representing your feelings of "escaping reality" into the arms of another person.

Hope it helps :wink::joyful:

I have to say its a VERY weird chart to read. Because if you liked this guy we would see some kind of reception from ruler of 1 or moon to the 7th.
 
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Becca

Well-known member
I don't even think you yourself like him at this point.

I do like him. It's just that I haven't seen him for a long time and I'm not head over heels in love with him at the very moment.

The sun is in sagittarius, detriment of mercury. You are clearly NOT happy with your boyfriend. But mercury is also in its own detriment. He is clearly NOT good himself.

Something is happening to your boyfriend, and affecting him and his relationship to you.

Yes, I am not happy with my boyfriend now. He's been unemployed for a year, and that could be what's affecting our relationship a lot. Of course, there are other possibilities. I wish he grew up and took some responsibilites.

Now as for the guy you are asking about, he is saturn, yet I don't see any kind of reception or aspect between saturn and sun. Only an opposition with the moon many degrees away.

The moon itself, its in taurus, its own exaltation. Perhaps this is what you are doing, making fantasies just to escape your own reality??

But there is more...there is this jupiter placed in the 1st, mutual reception with the sun.

Is it possible that you actually like another guy you are not mentioning? Or perhaps that jupiter represents...something else. Jupiter rules the 5th, perhaps the mutual reception with the sun indicates what you are currently lacking in your relationship.

You want a child? or perhaps its a sexual issue (as in you and your boyfriend are not being intimate)? or perhaps jupiter represents another guy?

Or even jupiter can represent the sexual fantasy, as ruler of 5th, for this guy. Not sure.

I take it that the exalted moon is representing your feelings of "escaping reality" into the arms of another person.

Hope it helps :wink::joyful:

I have to say its a VERY weird chart to read. Because if you liked this guy we would see some kind of reception from ruler of 1 or moon to the 7th.

What would the chart say if you took Uranus as the ruler of Aquarius?

Well, my bf and I haven't had sex since last Monday because he was sick with cold. His parents have two houses and his mother and sister are in one, and his father and him in the other. His sister is a student and only his mother is working, and she's investing all her money in his sister, so my bf is in the house where they only occasionally turn on the heating, and I couldn't go there these days because it is cold. At the beginning of the relationship I was hoping for some future, but my bf isn't doing much to help himself improve his life and his financial situation, less our relationship. As for me, I'm educated and employed, but it pisses me off that he can't get himself together.

I've no idea who Jupiter is. The Taurean is the only guy I've liked since my teenage years. All my bfs hit on me because they liked me, the Taurean was the only guy I had my gun pointed at.

As for children, well, I would like to settle down, but I don't want to be the only provider. I think a child deserves much better than that.

Then again, I work with teenagers, I'm a teacher, so maybe it's them in my chart. I was typing up a test for them before I came here.

Thank you for your help, Dirius :smile: You're a good chart reader :D
 
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Arena

Well-known member
Interesting ... do let us know if you will meet this old love of yours.

If you use Uranus as ruler of Aq, you can see that you, the Sun is going into an exact trine to Uranus in about one degree. It would indicate a meeting for you and indicate that your feelings are mutual. But many people do not consider the modern planets in horary.

Jupiter is not necessarily a person in horary - it can also denote something to do with the 5th house as it is it's ruler.

I ask you to let us know how the matter evolves as I am interested in noting and learning if the outer planets do indeed rule signs.
 

Becca

Well-known member
Hi, Arena! Thanks for your reply. I'll let you know. I'll post a horary next time I see him. I think it'll be more readable.

If I revealed some details about him maybe someone would be able to guess his rising sign and then see if we're compatible or not.

So, if anyone is willing to help, here goes what I know about him. He's tall, has dark eyes, black hair, nice smile. He has a 7-9 years older brother. His father died in the first months of 2013. He's left-handed. His parents went to work abroad when he was 15, and left him to live alone. His house is at the base of the hill in our town. He likes rock music, often wears blue jeans. He seems to be calm and laid-back when he walks or when he is in the company. He used to train volleyball and my friends saw him running in the summer, too. He appears quiet but not shy, silent but not stupid. I don't know which rising sign radiates with those qualities.
 

Becca

Well-known member
lunaplina, your post means a lot to me.
I used to shake like a leaf when I saw him 13,14 years ago. Later I ignored him because I felt stupid and pathetic, I thought he knew about my feelings, and I could only hope that he would feel the same, but why would he do that when he saw me with someone else? His friend was also an acquaintance of my ex boyfriend. He also knows my current boyfriend. The first time I saw him since I've been with my boyfriend he greeted my boyfriend at a rock gig we went to. He says hello every time when he sees my boyfriend, and they sometimes talked too, when we were out in a pub or a bar. I was standing or dancing to the music while they were exchanging a few lines. I told my boyfriend not to introduce me to him. My boyfriend doesn't see him as a threat as this Taurus is passive and a good friend, and my boyfriend also thinks I'm one of the most loyal and righteous people in the world, and that I would never cheat on him with anybody.
You're in the situation I exactly don't want to be into, like I've said before. I don't want to be physically married to someone while in the clouds with someone else. I, like you, wasted time in my first relationship because of this guy. I blew an almost 6 year long relationship. My first boyfriend was the kindest I've had and the one who put most effort. If this Taurean didn't exist, it would have been easier for me to focus on the relationship I was in.
Interestingly enough, back in 2009. and 2010. I was with an American who I adored and I didn't think of other guys. Sadly, he thought I wanted someone else. He was jealous without a reason. However, our breakup was horrible and therefore I got over him quickly. I've read that the contacts/aspects our natal Venus makes to other planets is the number of premarital relationship we have. I don't know how to recognize each of my exes in my natal chart.
 
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kimbermoon

Well-known member
Hello again Becca; several months ago we spoke about your natal indications and it seems that the Venus/Neptune paradox still follows you. Fantasy-land definitely offers more excitement and intrigue as opposed to the daily doldrums we experience in the outer world, however it can go extremes.
Seems like you are still trying to wrestle with your problems of possessiveness.
The question is whether these daydreams are indeed 'haunting you', causing problems in the reality you face daily.
Am I to understand that you are no longer with your bf?

You do have a vivid imagination [Neptune/Sagittarius] yet you are needing to work on your Yod configuration in order to keep things in balance. Such ongoing daydreams can lead to obsessions which could ultimately lead to stalking behaviour, considering that you are already investigating him from behind the scenes. That Jupiter/Uranus conjunct in the 12th H can denote a proclivity for that which you need to beware of.
Personally I would not take these daydreams as a sign that you are 'supposed to be with him'
Rather you need to identify and address the psychological issues that lie beneath your own need to focus your attention on someone who is obviously unavailable for whatever reasons. Time and space seem to be keeping you from connecting, and perhaps it would help to turn your focus on more artistic endeavours instead [ noting the 5th H energies] rather than focusing all your energies on 'what if' contemplations. You do note that these patterns are making you feel melancholic at this time.
Neptune has recently turned direct finally, so hopefully that can help you to see your reality more clearly, and deal with the inner illusions you carry about love. By channeling your obsessions through artistic endeavors can be very soothing for the Soul.
Your current transit influences should be given some thought; now that Mars is in Aquarius, your Taurus planets are being challenged, and the urge to act may be heightened for you, yet it can also cause you to be more impulsive [reckless], something you need to keep in check, so as to avoid the consequences of ill-thought-out actions.
 

Becca

Well-known member
lunaplina and kimbermoon, thank you for your emotional support.

It makes sense that the Taurus is in a relationship. That would explain why I haven't seen him for a long time. He could be involved with someone with whom he doesn't go out but stays at home instead. He must know about me, I'm 100% sure of it. He knows my parents, my old classmate, etc. I don't know what he thinks about me. Of course I don't expect him to be crazy about me, but there were 2-4 moments last year when I caught him looking at me and I caught him listening to my conversation once.

As for my boyfriend, we broke up in summer and weren't together for 6-7 weeks. The last time I was here I posted a horary chart wondering if we'll get back together. Tikana told me not to count on that. I still wanted to try to get him back, and I used his birthday as an excuse. He was playing a bit hard to get, but we got back together a few days after that. And I don't regret doing it because we had some of our bast moments in that period.

However, my boyfriend and I are stuck in a rut and it pisses me off a lot, so we started having arguments and little breakups again. I hate the position I am in this relationship - that I am the one who puts most effort.

Let me explain. He hasn't been working for a year and he doesn't put any effort in finding a job. He says he won't do just anything. For what it's worse, he doesn't appreciate that I pay for everything, for the drinks we have in bars and coffee shops, for the snacks and drinks we drink at his place. He acts as if he's some baron or lord and that it is implied that other people treat him like that. He has no life plan. He can't fix some of his gadgets that broke down. He depends upon his mother's money and mercy as if he's a baby.

Being unhappy with my relationship makes me wonder how it would be to have a more romantic and stable one. I want to be pampered for once. I crave fun and excitement and royal treatment too. My boyfriend isn't my baby to put up with his tantrums and stubbornness. A partner should be my equal, my peer.

A few hours ago we had another row. These rows make me less and less optimistic about our future. I put a lot of effort to make things work, but it often seems to me like I'm chasing windmills.

One more thing, kimber, you tell me I should focus on something artistic - what do you have in mind? Should I read books, watch movies, go out, play games, or should I try to write a book myself or write poetry or draw? I was thinking about trying to write. I would like to write a novel (probably romance or comedy) someday. My Jupiter is in my 12th house, so I don't know in which way I could "rule from the shadow" like he does it there.
 
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