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  #26  
Unread 05-05-2013, 11:06 PM
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surrealsuburb123 surrealsuburb123 is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

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The only thing that is important is you being out of that environment. Don't let your parents blame games sink in, the problem is the two of them. And has nothing really to do with you. Don't blame yourself, because it's not your fault, nor will it ever be. please remember that.
I agree, ashriia. This will be in the back of my head. You are right, it isn't my fault and I will slowly accept that even though they still point their fingers at me. Thank you for the support. <3

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I just hope you can forgive them and they each other, and still stay a family. I think you will make it.
I think I can, but forgiveness will just have to find its way into me after I feel it all subsides, or at least after I've taken the distance I need.

aquarius7000, I think you are right. I feel that the best option is to at least confront him in a friendly and civilized way so he won't feel threatened. Thanks again.

I agree with Lin. I guess when this all comes from people with similar experiences, it becomes easier to accept that I'm not doomed to something and that there are ways that I can escape this ordeal if I take action on the opportunities. And I agree that my mother is not a stable woman- at least mentally. Her dad was also an alcoholic and cheated on his wife, but gave my mom special attention. My mom used to have problems with her mom. "Family problems" seem to be a reoccurring thing. But I do realize I can't fix anything for them.

I agree with greybeard. You guys are all great.

I wish I could give you all a hug. ;_;

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  #27  
Unread 05-07-2013, 01:28 AM
Lin Lin is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

I'd like to add something.
Eden was born in the year of the TIGER in Chinese astrology. Earth-Tiger.
These people have powerful personalities....
Her father was born in the year of the Monkey, Earth Monkey.
In her interesting book on this subject, Theodora Lau has this to say about compatibility between these two signs:

"The Tiger will encounter the most difficulties with the sign opposite him in the Circle of Conflict. In this case the Tiger's NEMESIS is the Monkey. Also, anyone whose ascendant is in the hours of the Tiger will most likely be incompatible."

Interesting to note that Eden's ascendant using this system is also TIGER.

"Tigers and Monkeys are both competitive but in altogether different ways and these two signs are very sore losers. The Tiger has power and daring on his side while the Monkey uses his wits and guile to turn the tables on the Tiger.

"In their game 'there can be NO WINNERS'." Swear to God, that is what it says.
"as both will refuse to surrender."

So, what most of us advised is doubly valid now....leaving the fight is the only practical option...when and however you can.
LIN
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  #28  
Unread 05-23-2013, 02:25 AM
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surrealsuburb123 surrealsuburb123 is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

Excuse me for the late reply. Looking at what LIN posted, I'm pretty shocked about how accurate that is. When my dad and I argue, it never comes to a settling point; it actually gets worse as it progresses until I just leave the room exhausted from yelling and crying. I'm done fighting for sure.

But something happened today that scared me.

My dad had gotten into a deadly car accident and he nearly lost his life. Somehow, he emerged without a scratch. I realized within a mater of seconds my life could have turned upside down. I think the Uranus transit might have had something to do with it? I'm not sure what to look at as far as transits go. Just a bit confused atm.
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  #29  
Unread 05-29-2013, 12:43 AM
Lin Lin is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

If the car was 'totaled', maybe it will be a wakeup call for HIM.

We can't control Uranus. We must make intelligent goals and decisions and stick to them as much as possible, realizing that our control over our lives is sometimes more and sometimes less.
We must always remember the bigger picture...the biggest goal and not let "events" sway us from working toward it.
LIN
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  #30  
Unread 06-02-2013, 10:41 AM
Govind Govind is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

Great post Lin. I was going to post some of my own advice but you expressed every thought I had more perfectly than I ever could.

I worry about your relationships with men later on in life after growing up with a father like this. This is not the most pressing issue right now, but remember to be careful with the relationships that you seek out later in your life.
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  #31  
Unread 06-02-2013, 01:39 PM
greybeard greybeard is offline
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Re: Bad Relationship With Father

The interesting thing about life is that most of what we do, most of the important choices we make, are deeply rooted in our unconscious...and we really have liittle choice in what we think we control.

If we were fully conscious creatures astrology wouldn't work.

No amount of advice and wise counsel will keep us from our folly. But at least we can say "I told you so."

A friend of mine "felt" she had let her younger sister down, hadn't "been there" for her. She thought about it, and all her reason and logic told her that what she felt just wasn't true. But all that reason and logic could not overcome those feelings.

I fell in love. I had fallen in love before, and I knew that Stupid and Love walk hand in hand. Greybeard, says I to myself....don't go getting stupid. But I got stupid anyway.

Feelings and past conditioning (our past experiences together with our responses to them) always color our present actions and choices. What would life be without that?

We live in the "sub-lunar world." We are "under the Moon," under her sway. The Moon is memory, habitual or automatic response and reflex, the past, and the unconscious portion of our mind (far and away the great portion of our mental activity.)

Last edited by greybeard; 06-02-2013 at 01:58 PM.
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