Should I continue to pursue something with X?

Background:- I first met this man when I was 20 and throughout the last two decades we've weaved in and out of each others lives never really getting past dating despite both being pulled towards each other. I have always felt a deep psychic connection towards him.

The communication is really off between us; he's very troubled at the moment and he is very passive aggressive and projects in his communication with me - which I sense is a defence mechanism to protect himself from feeling rejected by me. But, it's tiresome for me as I'm very emotionally self-aware and expressive, and I would prefer to talk it out openly. We're in our mid to late 30's now and this feels like the last time we have to make something work between us.

Q:- Should I continue to pursue something with X?

My very basic interpretation:-

Interesting to see myself as the Sun, I've always felt to be the dominant one of the two of us and I'm very, very protective of him. Sun rightly placed in the 5th in flirty & fun Sagg, dating him and having fun is on my mind. Sun conjunct the south node, past life connection - or is this unhealthy for me and taking me away from my destiny elsewhere?

He is Saturn in his 12th, he' struggling with his mental health at the moment and I'm hoping that the strength of Saturn indicates that he'll get through this, sextile to Chiron in his third of communication. He last squares Uranus.

We make no connections - surprising. But then, there is all the sun/moon/asc connections with Mercury, ruler of my 2nd/3rd 11th / his turned 5th/8th/9th.

Any deeper and more experienced insight will be appreciated. Thank you in advance.

VenusInFurs said:

Background:- I first met this man when I was 20 and throughout the last two decades we've weaved in and out of each others lives never really getting past dating despite both being pulled towards each other. I have always felt a deep psychic connection towards him.

The communication is really off between us; he's very troubled at the moment and he is very passive aggressive and projects in his communication with me - which I sense is a defence mechanism to protect himself from feeling rejected by me. But, it's tiresome for me as I'm very emotionally self-aware and expressive, and I would prefer to talk it out openly. We're in our mid to late 30's now and this feels like the last time we have to make something work between us.

Q:- Should I continue to pursue something with X?

My very basic interpretation:-

Interesting to see myself as the Sun, I've always felt to be the dominant one of the two of us and I'm very, very protective of him. Sun rightly placed in the 5th in flirty & fun Sagg, dating him and having fun is on my mind. Sun conjunct the south node, past life connection - or is this unhealthy for me and taking me away from my destiny elsewhere?

He is Saturn in his 12th, he' struggling with his mental health at the moment and I'm hoping that the strength of Saturn indicates that he'll get through this, sextile to Chiron in his third of communication. He last squares Uranus.

We make no connections - surprising. But then, there is all the sun/moon/asc connections with Mercury, ruler of my 2nd/3rd 11th / his turned 5th/8th/9th.

Any deeper and more experienced insight will be appreciated. Thank you in advance.

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Interesting to see myself as the Sun, I've always felt to be the dominant one of the two of us and I'm very, very protective of him. Sun rightly placed in the 5th in flirty & fun Sagg, dating him and having fun is on my mind. Sun conjunct the south node, past life connection - or is this unhealthy for me and taking me away from my destiny elsewhere?

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You are feeling flirty and romantically optimistic in the Sagg 5th house. But as you point out, the South Node is the elephant in the room.

As to your either/or question---I think the answer is 'both. ' You two do have strong past life connections, but it is also possible that this is an unhealthy relationship for you, and you are attracted to it because it is familiar, although possibly slightly toxic.

Do you want to be the dominant one that feels the need to protect your partner, or would you prefer to have a strong ambitious partner that could protect and look out for you?

I ask that because You, the Sun @ 18Sa, are in an exact square with Neptune @18 Pisces in your 8th of intimate relations...that concerns me...

With a Sun/Neptune exact square, Men close to you may be a disappointment. But in your mind, you may feel you have a positive relationship going on.

What you may not realise is that you are focussing mostly on their positive qualities while ignoring their negative qualities.

So Neptune squaring the Sun, may be the astrological equivalent of a wake-up call.You may eventually find out that this man is not really who you think he is. You have on your rose coloured glasses maybe?

You may be ignoring or in denial of some of his major issues that could make this a very difficult relationship for you.


It is imperative to stay as realistic as possible during this time and acknowledge the other person’s shortcomings. No one is perfect, and the more you remember that, the easier it will be later on.

He is Saturn in his 12th, he' struggling with his mental health at the moment and I'm hoping that the strength of Saturn indicates that he'll get through this, sextile to Chiron in his third of communication. He last squares Uranus.

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Saturn is strong in Capricorn, but not so strong in the 12th. Saturn is in the last degree and about to change signs to Aquarius. That will be a big shift and it could go either way, in terms of his mental health struggle. So you should wait and see how things unfold, in my opinion...

No .. don't you are wasting your time... you should be chasing Mars character whoever that is

Thank you both.

katydid - Everything is on point, thank you . Thank you for pointing out the Sun Square Neptune in my 8th - The relationship is unhealthy for me in terms of my emotional needs being neglected (and abused, when he's being passive aggressive ). He's so troubled, chaotic and he hasn't, unfortunately, grown in the ways that I have so the communication really falls down for us. Then, we have an amazing amount of positives together.

I'm holding both the negatives and positives in my mind together. I need to be logical here and write a list. I might post our synastry, I don't have his exact birth time though.

I can't work out the mercury aspects; does anyone have any insight?

As for mars, I wasn't sure on the opposition and if it was anyone. I'm not actively dating at the moment.

Update.

This ended terribly. I attempted to talk with him about his behaviour - instead of being open and honest, he conveniently said "I don't remember doing or saying that" and accused me of abusing him by bringing it up! He then ghosted me on my birthday - planned and vengeful.

I regret not sticking to my boundaries. The only thing that has hurt, like katydid mentioned, was knowing we'll never be able to have what I wanted with him - it just isn't there on his side in reality.

Edit:

Horary wise, maybe Mars opp moon shows his abusive communication towards me?