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  #1  
Unread 01-09-2020, 02:59 AM
Luxmangel Luxmangel is offline
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Is my friend still interested in maintaining a friendship?

Hello, how are you? My name is Arthur and I wanted to ask the help of some experienced astrology student on a horary chart I raised. I saw that the map is radical, because the lord of the hour (Saturn) is in the same element as the Ascendant (Virgo). Thus, it is subject to judgment.

The question I raised for this chart is about a friend of mine, who I have a lot of respect and consideration, asking if she has ever tired of our friendship. Contextualizing the previous events of the question. This friend and I have known each other for almost two years, and for some time now we had a very close relationship. I like her and I showed that a lot a she, and she also showed that she trusted me and was very considerate. But after a while now our lives have been troubled, especially in the family, and I began to realize that she was very downcast. Both she and I are diagnosed with Depression, and in recent months it was quite common to exchange stickers about it, about the crises of sadness that unfortunately this situation brings. Until a moment came that she seemed to wish stop sharing what was happening, and I began to feel unwanted.

I blamed myself and gave her opportunities several times for her to express that she didn't like me anymore, but she didn't say anything about it, said it was something in my head. She just said she was tired. Until she went straight one day, she said it was best for me to look for another friendship, but she also said it was because of the Depression and saw no way out of what she was feeling, but it was not my problem and I didn 't have to worry (obviously I worried, but it felt me bad). We spoke last after a fight that I got in one personal disagreement, and I felt a lot of concern on her part, mainly because was hurt me and clearly I not felt me well. And I saw than she cared. But in the end, she said she couldn't keep in touch anymore and that she just needed to be alone. Then it just vanished from my life, with no further news about it (although it's only been a week, but it's different from who I kind of saw she all days).

Anyway, I think I contextualized the situation well. And personally I'm pretty upset about what happened, I miss our friendship and I'm saddened that she got tired of me or something, because with the informations than I have of thes social networks she stays the same with other friendships. For this reason I get confused with everything and I can't even interpret the situation and the chart. If anyone can help me with this I would appreciate it very much.
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  #2  
Unread 01-10-2020, 06:30 AM
Iced8Ace Iced8Ace is offline
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Re: Is my friend still interested in maintaining a friendship?

Sorry to hear. Maybe a bit of insight, I went through this with a dear friend of mine. I also was dealing with a lot, (as always) and I didn't want to put my problems on my friend all the time, because I was worried I'd bring her down too. So I asked her for space, while I sorted myself out. I also deal with depression. I later realized that it was wrong of me.

It has nothing to do with you, it's just, you'd hate to constantly bring your friend down. My solution was to talk to more than one friend about my troubles. Understand she may not want to share everything with you. That's her decision and all you can do is respect that, let her know you're there if she'd like to talk, and then give her space. The exception would be if she shares something worrying, or could be in a potentially dangerous situation. Those are just my thoughts above, unrelated to the horary.

On the horary, she'd be Moon, and you'd be Mercury. Moon is in Mercury's triplicity, but also, Mercury's detriment. She sees you as her good friend but that's being overpowered right now by her heightened annoyance, and frankly, anger at you. Mercury is in her domicile and triplicitiy, you love this woman. Probably why you won't leave her be. You should back off, leave her alone. If she cares for your friendship, she'll return. If she does, you may want to just ask her out, provided she's in a better place (where she's not dealing with a lot of personal issues). If she doesn't return, it's not your fault. She just decided she couldn't maintain your relationship, doesn't make you a bad friend.
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  #3  
Unread 01-12-2020, 12:52 PM
Luxmangel Luxmangel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iced8Ace View Post
Sorry to hear. Maybe a bit of insight, I went through this with a dear friend of mine. I also was dealing with a lot, (as always) and I didn't want to put my problems on my friend all the time, because I was worried I'd bring her down too. So I asked her for space, while I sorted myself out. I also deal with depression. I later realized that it was wrong of me.

It has nothing to do with you, it's just, you'd hate to constantly bring your friend down. My solution was to talk to more than one friend about my troubles. Understand she may not want to share everything with you. That's her decision and all you can do is respect that, let her know you're there if she'd like to talk, and then give her space. The exception would be if she shares something worrying, or could be in a potentially dangerous situation. Those are just my thoughts above, unrelated to the horary.

On the horary, she'd be Moon, and you'd be Mercury. Moon is in Mercury's triplicity, but also, Mercury's detriment. She sees you as her good friend but that's being overpowered right now by her heightened annoyance, and frankly, anger at you. Mercury is in her domicile and triplicitiy, you love this woman. Probably why you won't leave her be. You should back off, leave her alone. If she cares for your friendship, she'll return. If she does, you may want to just ask her out, provided she's in a better place (where she's not dealing with a lot of personal issues). If she doesn't return, it's not your fault. She just decided she couldn't maintain your relationship, doesn't make you a bad friend.
Hi Iced8ace Thanks for your answer.

I understand what you say, I agree with you, and it makes a lot of sense when I stop to think about my situation. In recent times when we were still talking regularly, both she and I were dealing with complicated situations in our lives. I knew she was having problems with an alcoholic and violent father, and she also knew about the stress I was having at my university, with a lack of consideration and support from my family about it.

At first it was quite common we to talk about her problems (and mine, alternately). I was trying to help her deal with this somehow while they were still living together, but after a while she stopped talking about it. She were still trying to keep in touch listening me, and I started to cheer her up. In the end, she told me "that I should try to worry more about me [and less about her] because my existence was enough for me to handle."

Regarding the horary, it also make a lot of sense to me. And I confess that yes, I like her a lot, but I still don't know how to define it is a loving. I can only say that it is a person that I want to see that is well, happy, and I do not care than necesserity that it is in a relationship with me or not. Regarding "leave her alone", I agree with you that I was thinking a lot about it and I intend to do so kkkkk.

I had contact with her yesterday, by the way, and we ended up talking. I realized that she really been only in a moment that I didn't want to see anyone, but really had consideration for me. I think I ended up showing that I was upset, but we had a good conversation, anyway and I have hope for the future of this friendship.

I ended up exceeding me in my answer, but thank you very much for reading.

Last edited by Luxmangel; 01-12-2020 at 12:58 PM.
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  #4  
Unread 01-23-2020, 09:07 PM
Iced8Ace Iced8Ace is offline
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Re: Is my friend still interested in maintaining a friendship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Luxmangel View Post
Hi Iced8ace Thanks for your answer.

I understand what you say, I agree with you, and it makes a lot of sense when I stop to think about my situation. In recent times when we were still talking regularly, both she and I were dealing with complicated situations in our lives. I knew she was having problems with an alcoholic and violent father, and she also knew about the stress I was having at my university, with a lack of consideration and support from my family about it.

At first it was quite common we to talk about her problems (and mine, alternately). I was trying to help her deal with this somehow while they were still living together, but after a while she stopped talking about it. She were still trying to keep in touch listening me, and I started to cheer her up. In the end, she told me "that I should try to worry more about me [and less about her] because my existence was enough for me to handle."

Regarding the horary, it also make a lot of sense to me. And I confess that yes, I like her a lot, but I still don't know how to define it is a loving. I can only say that it is a person that I want to see that is well, happy, and I do not care than necesserity that it is in a relationship with me or not. Regarding "leave her alone", I agree with you that I was thinking a lot about it and I intend to do so kkkkk.

I had contact with her yesterday, by the way, and we ended up talking. I realized that she really been only in a moment that I didn't want to see anyone, but really had consideration for me. I think I ended up showing that I was upset, but we had a good conversation, anyway and I have hope for the future of this friendship.

I ended up exceeding me in my answer, but thank you very much for reading.
Sorry for the late reply. It does sound like she wants you to take care of yourself. Just make sure you handle your own problems, too. You can't take care of anyone if you're not okay. Try to listen to her, and give her space. Let her know you're there if she wants to talk, and that your working on your own issues. (which I hope works out for you). Lots of love and all the best!
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  #5  
Unread 02-07-2020, 02:26 AM
Luxmangel Luxmangel is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Iced8Ace View Post
Sorry for the late reply. It does sound like she wants you to take care of yourself. Just make sure you handle your own problems, too. You can't take care of anyone if you're not okay. Try to listen to her, and give her space. Let her know you're there if she wants to talk, and that your working on your own issues. (which I hope works out for you). Lots of love and all the best!
Okay, Ice. I can't say anything, I also did the same.

I also had this impression, and I have tried to take care of my life and my problems in this last month, giving her the space I realized she needed, but still giving one support for her. And I feel that our friendship has gone back almost as it was before, and we both seem to be better too. What makes me happy with this situation.

But, anyway, thank you very much for your help!
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