Momma, there are two major places to look for the mother [i. e., you] in a child's chart. One is the moon (especially in a night birth) and then there is some astrological disagreement about whether the IC or MC best represents the mother [of a female born at night], so we might just look at the axis as a whole.
Your daughter natally has moon square Venus and Jupiter. This is one of the easier squares to have, but it can suggest emotional (moon) excesses (Jupiter) or tension between her need for independence (moon in Aries) or her seeing you as too independent of her vs her own desires [Venus in Cancer]. Your daughter has Cancer rising, so the moon is her ruling planet, making her feelings and her mother extra important to her. Your daughter's moon also makes a semi-square to her Uranus. This will make her feelings a little explosive and subject to sudden shifts.
Transiting Saturn, the Dr. No of the zodiac, has been rolling back and forth over her IC/MC axis, and will continue to do so through July of 2010, when it begins to move off. Coupled with her natally stressful Saturn opposite that assertive Mars/Pluto combination in Sagittarius, she is sort of hard-wired to be engaged in power relations struggles of one sort or another, whether she wants them or not. It sounds as though you are appearing as Saturn in her life. Which is not bad, and you must sustain your firm but fair discipline if you want her to turn out all right, but just to be sensitive to the possibility that you may be showing up in her life as the kind of authority figures (parent/s, teachers) that you didn't like in your own childhood.
Well, obviously a little girl needs and loves her mother! The question is, can astrology help you out any? I think so.
With her Leo sun/Mercury, your child really does need to feel that she's your little princess. When she does what you ask her to do, any praise will be an effort very well spent. With her Cancer rising and 12th house Cancer placements, she is probably also very sensitive. As annoyed as you will understandably become with her, try very, very hard not to shame her or humiliate her. Cancer rising is apt just to go into her shell and not come out, except to snap her claws occasionally. You can probably put up with some childish pouting or sulking now, but you don't want to lose your influence with her when she approaches those pre-teen and teen years, when girls are subjected to far more serious temptations than a minor temper tantrum with Mum.
With her Leo sun in the 2nd house, you may wish to help your daughter learn about money management at an early age. Things like managing a small allowance and helping with the shopping. She may like to have a collection or two of pretty things. Jewelry suitable for a child, perhaps.
Your daughter has an interesting formation in her chart called a "kite", which has its tip or apex on Saturn in Gemini in the 11th house. This will be an energy for her to develop in her lifetime. She may discover what this is when she gets older, but it could be something like being a manager or supervisor (Saturn) in a career that involves a large-ish organization (11th house) and a lot of mental stimulation (Gemini).
On a practical level, you might consult with your daughter's teacher, to see if her acting-out is restricted to the home or whether it is showing up at school.
BTW, I have two adult children. That childhood "tissue tension" or growing pains kind of sorted itself out when they hit about age 17--just before they were old enough to leave the house. Now we're on excellent terms, but they both live far away, and I miss those early childhood years!
But I think she might need to be proved for real the fairness/unfairness of a situation, the reason why some things have to be the way they have to be.