Talents in the chart (writing??)

Talents in the chart

My question is about work or talents. Or, what should I focus on, which direction to go?
It took me 36 years to get a bit 'a sense of self', to believe in my self sometimes.

I have a tendency to hide myself, to not stand up but be compassionate. But I feel i should stand up.
(Currently Pluto BMlilith transit)
I am wondering what's my gift to the world??

Any suggestions? My NN is in Cancer (I learned a lot about emotions) in the 4th house (i still have no clue where to live and don't have a homefamily or partner, i wish to)

Sometimes people are surprised by my writings...

Should i have an attitude of service? (Arrogance in previous life?Tendency to be submissive)
Or should i feel more what I truely feel, and act on that? Such as my Aries Asc and vulnerable way of being true.



Aspect table:

https://horoscopes.astro-seek.com/horoscope-aspectarium3__radix_16-12-1982_13-20.png?asc_ukazat=1&minor_150=on&minor_45=on&minor_135=on&minor_72=on&minor_144=on&true_uzel=1&true_lilith=1&dum_1_new=12.251179521583&dum_10_new=274.57236591793&no_domy=&dum_1=0&dum_2=30&dum_3=60&dum_4=90&dum_5=120&dum_6=150&&pd_7=ANO&pd_8=ANO&pd_9=ANO&pd_10=ANO&pd_11=ANO&planeta_slunce=264.21660984905&planeta_luna=276.46714678376&planeta_merkur=278.74497622937&planeta_venuse=274.60616390397&planeta_mars=304.87265757201&planeta_jupiter=238.03032061604&planeta_saturn=211.66850850197&planeta_uran=246.04875217602&planeta_neptun=266.66365653682&planeta_pluto=208.88658418178&planeta_uzel=94.208679694992&planeta_lilith=291.36913692897&planeta_chiron=53.757822749458&planeta_fortune=24.501716456296&r_chiron=ANO&tolerance=1&tolerance_paral=1&house_system=whole&&narozeni_den=16&narozeni_mesic=12&narozeni_rok=1982&narozeni_hodina=13&narozeni_minuta=20&narozeni_mesto_hidden=Bussum&narozeni_stat_hidden=NL&narozeni_podstat_kratky_hidden=&narozeni_city=Bussum,%20Netherlands&narozeni_sirka_stupne=52&narozeni_sirka_minuty=16&narozeni_sirka_smer=0&narozeni_delka_stupne=5&narozeni_delka_minuty=10&narozeni_delka_smer=0&narozeni_timezone_form=auto&narozeni_timezone_dst_form=auto&&&paralela_slunce=-23.314749606179&paralela_luna=-23.490562447199&paralela_merkur=-25.407274012869&paralela_venuse=-24.147868634529&paralela_mars=-20.274652958523&paralela_jupiter=-18.922171374703&paralela_saturn=-9.8544752163888&paralela_uran=-21.206780167871&paralela_neptun=-22.189351907001&paralela_pluto=4.5703276121727&paralela_uzel=23.374159417224&paralela_lilith=-23.290246110002&paralela_chiron=15.542285953995&paralela_ascendent=4.8423838747405&paralela_mc=-23.362465510773&tvar_ukazat=

Re: Talents in the chart

With sun conjunct Neptune, you may spend your lifetime without a clear sense of self, because Neptune tends to blur or erase what it touches. On the other hand, this placement is seen in people who are visionary in some way; including scientists. A good way to handle sun-Neptune is to be other- or outer-directed.

With your moon, Mercury and Venus in the 10th house, I can see where you would be driven to write. But think about how you would like to proceed. Many professional writers get their start by daily journaling, taking creative writing courses and workshops, joining amateur writers' groups (in person or on-line) and above all, getting critical feedback. It is so important to get feedback on your work, and to make recommended changes if it is critical. That is how you will improve.

We should all be ourselves-- provided it doesn't harm or seriously annoy other people.

waybread said:

With sun conjunct Neptune, you may spend your lifetime without a clear sense of self, because Neptune tends to blur or erase what it touches. On the other hand, this placement is seen in people who are visionary in some way; including scientists. A good way to handle sun-Neptune is to be other- or outer-directed.

Click to expand...

Thank you for your kindness to reply on me.
I noticed being outer oriented helps me to stay more centred. It's a valuable reminder.
I ve done scientific work previously, and have been good at it, but it made me feel too much in my head. Not feeling alive, woman, using my senses.
Now i think about it sometimes -while writing a thesis e.g. or while asking for advice to an elderly monk- teachers pointed me to a way of looking I have, my own kind of wisdom..(about life and living)

waybread said:

With your moon, Mercury and Venus in the 10th house, I can see where you would be driven to write. But think about how you would like to proceed. Many professional writers get their start by daily journaling, taking creative writing courses and workshops, joining amateur writers' groups (in person or on-line) and above all, getting critical feedback. It is so important to get feedback on your work, and to make recommended changes if it is critical. That is how you will improve.

We should all be ourselves-- provided it doesn't harm or seriously annoy other people.

Click to expand...

Maybe i also tought about writing because i have been very shy to express myself with talking. And mostly listen to others (somehow they feel safe with me to tell their stories). So then i wrote about my experiences and the way i notice the small things in life or deep pains, joy of nature etc. And they said it has a touch of mystery and deep emotion. It may be pluto-related.

Sometimes i wonder if i will work with people in the last stage of life - dead (sorry English isn't my mother tongue 🌷) or early life - babies/toddlers.

But i recently mostly enjoy the life of travelling, nature, increasing embodiment and truth in myself (instead of blurry Neptune), learning to love and help my friends and acquintances more and more.

I remember your first sentence. Thank you. It's also a pitfall to search.