Asking a Horary question on Astro.com

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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
Osamenor said:
That would be, at best, a one sided relationship. All about what he can do for you, no consideration for what he might need you to do for him. And you don't even know if he would be willing to help you overcome this. Based on the second chart in particular, I don't think he is. He needs someone who's already ready for emotional connection and commitment. You're not. Ready to start working on it, maybe, but that's not the same thing as being ready for it.

Even if he were willing, though, it's the wrong thing to ask of him. He's not your therapist. He's your friend and love interest. Close personal friends and romantic partners are not the people we should ever ask to change us. If you're not ready for the kind of relationship he wants, it's not fair to ask him to make you ready. That's your responsibility. Before you can have that kind of relationship, you have to make yourself ready for it. If you can't do it alone, seek help from someone who doesn't have a personal stake in the outcome--a therapist, for instance.

In these charts, you and he take turns being Saturn and Moon. I think that shows us what you both need. Saturn needs its equal, and if that equal isn't present, Saturn prefers to be alone. Moon needs emotional security. The second chart in particular shows your emotional security needs not matching his need for an equal.



Were you emotionally committed to that previous partner? Or was that also a relationship where you didn't connect emotionally and used sex as a defense mechanism?
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No there was an emotional connection it wasn't just sex. I understand what you are saying about what the charts say. But I'm saying that I can and would connect with him emotionally. I shouldn't have told him that I don't connect emotionally. Because I wasn't saying that in regards to him. It's like that with people in general. Once I get to know the person. I do open up it just takes me awhile to do so. I can be committed to him emotionally. If he's the type who really wants something serious. And not just a hookup I can be committed. I had a feeling that he liked me but I just wasn't sure. I just thought he wanted sex. Because that's how most men are but I want to be with him. And I'm tired of lying to myself about it. Now I have to wonder what could have been. Because I didn't give him a chance.
 
Osamenor

Osamenor

Staff member
ChildOfVenus said:
Asking whether or not we will talk again is a horary question.
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Not unless you make it a horary question, and to make it a horary question, you have to cast a horary chart. Since you didn't, it's not a horary question at this point. And your question about your moon being in his eighth house is definitely not horary.
 
waybread

waybread

Well-known member
IleneK makes a very important point. A rule of horary is that you get to ask a question just once-- by any means of divination. If you wait some months and the basic circumstances have changed, you can ask again.

The reason is because horary goes by the moment of the question. If you ask the same question repeatedly, then which moment is correct? Different charts will have different answers.

The other problem is being crystal-clear on the question you really wish to ask. Slicing-and-dicing what is basically the same question to cast multiple charts doesn't work. Neither does asking about mere contact when in your heart-of-hearts you really want to know about a sexual relationship.
 
waybread

waybread

Well-known member
Can you say how you interpreted these two charts? The square between the significators in #2 doesn't look so promising.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
waybread said:
IleneK makes a very important point. A rule of horary is that you get to ask a question just once-- by any means of divination. If you wait some months and the basic circumstances have changed, you can ask again.

The reason is because horary goes by the moment of the question. If you ask the same question repeatedly, then which moment is correct? Different charts will have different answers.

The other problem is being crystal-clear on the question you really wish to ask. Slicing-and-dicing what is basically the same question to cast multiple charts doesn't work. Neither does asking about mere contact when in your heart-of-hearts you really want to know about a sexual relationship.
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Honestly at this point I don't care about a sexual relationship. I don't want to have sex with him. I just want to talk to him the sex is no longer important to me. I just want to go out with him. Like I should have done when he first asked me out. I thought that was what I wanted at first but it's not. I really miss him this is so messed up.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
Osamenor said:
Not unless you make it a horary question, and to make it a horary question, you have to cast a horary chart. Since you didn't, it's not a horary question at this point. And your question about your moon being in his eighth house is definitely not horary.
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I understand I just thought that more than one question could be answered in the same chart.

Since the answer about us having sex is a no. And the fact that for me sex isn't important in regards to this situation anymore. I asked if we would go out sometime in the future. Meaning as in going out on a date or dating. I've only asked this question once and this is the only chart pulled for this question.


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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
He replied to my message saying that I didn't do anything wrong. And that he'll hangout with me very soon. I don't know what to think. If I should really believe him or not.
 
waybread

waybread

Well-known member
ChildOfVenus, I'm really confused just reading your posts. Sorry if I've missed something, but they seem contradictory. There is a lot of confusion here. Maybe while you're waiting to hear back from him, this would be a good time to get some clarity on what you want from him; and whether it's best simply to have no expectations of anything developing.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
waybread said:
ChildOfVenus, I'm really confused just reading your posts. Sorry if I've missed something, but they seem contradictory. There is a lot of confusion here. Maybe while you're waiting to hear back from him, this would be a good time to get some clarity on what you want from him; and whether it's best simply to have no expectations of anything developing.
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I've already said that I would like for us to be friends.
 
rafaella

rafaella

Well-known member
ChildOfVenus said:
So why do I get a no when I ask if this person will contact me. And a yes when I ask if we will have sexual relations?



This first chart is when I asked if the person will contact me.

This second chart is when I asked if we will have sexual relations.
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None of the charts give a yes answer... you need to study horary a bit more. There is negative reception from him, so it seems he is not really interested. The charts suggests too much interest from you... this can be emotionally difficult territory, unrequited love... I hope you can move on soon enough.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
rafaella said:
None of the charts give a yes answer... you need to study horary a bit more. There is negative reception from him, so it seems he is not really interested. The charts suggests too much interest from you... this can be emotionally difficult territory, unrequited love... I hope you can move on soon enough.
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Well he contacted me recently so I guess you can't base life and situations off of horary readings. This seems to always happen the charts say no but realilty is always different. Last time I asked a horary question about me and someone else the answer was no but the guy and I ended having sex. Just like how supposedly the chart says I don't want to be in a committed relationship. Yet l'm saying that's not the case how can a chart tell someone how they feel emotionally? It can't.
 
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rafaella

rafaella

Well-known member
ChildOfVenus said:
Well he contacted me recently so I guess you can't base life and situations off of horary readings. This seems to always happen the charts say no but realilty is always different. Last time I asked a horary question about me and someone else the answer was no but the guy and I ended having sex. Just like how supposedly the chart says I don't want to be in a committed relationship. Yet l'm saying that's not the case how can a chart tell someone how they feel emotionally? It can't.
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well perhaps your chart would be more accurate if you didn't keep asking same question over and over again? As per Ilene, you asked her to provide a horary delineation, she made a chart and gave you her interpretation, yet you go and pull a new chart an hour later... your chart suggests him to not being interested in you, contact is one thing, a relationship is different... you are overly involved to see reason. If you get involved with this person, you will get hurt...

Horary is for those who have more respect for it and don't keep pulling chart after chart.... you have no understanding of how it works, so perhaps better stick to you composite and synastry charts.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
waybread said:
Cool, but is this friends with benefits? Or was the sexual relationship part merely to see what the next chart would do?

In horary, it is so important to tell a straight story.
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What difference does it make? You stated that both charts is a no. I don't understand none of this. It's confusing because the charts say one thing. While he's saying something else. This is why I don't know what to believe. So perhaps I'll just block him and cut contact.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
rafaella said:
well perhaps your chart would be more accurate if you didn't keep asking same question over and over again? As per Ilene, you asked her to provide a horary delineation, she made a chart and gave you her interpretation, yet you go and pull a new chart an hour later... your chart suggests him to not being interested in you, contact is one thing, a relationship is different... you are overly involved to see reason. If you get involved with this person, you will get hurt...

Horary is for those who have more respect for it and don't keep pulling chart after chart.... you have no understanding of how it works, so perhaps better stick to you composite and synastry charts.
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I didn't ask the same questions over and over again. You always say this the questions aren't the same. I know the difference between contact and being in a relationship. The chart says he's not interested. Yet he's the one who initiated contact asking me to go out with him. Well that really makes a lot of sense. What exactly do I say to him when he keeps saying he's interested? So what should my response be? Should I tell him I know he's not really interested? Even though he keeps saying otherwise?

A few days ago he said that he knows it seems like he's playing games. But that he's not he's just really busy with work. But that he'll be able to hang out soon. I told him that I've met someone else who I want to date. But that it's not nice for him to lead people on. That he should just be honest and direct if he's really not interested. That was my reply based on what was said about the charts.
 
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ChildOfVenus

Well-known member
I love astrology it's one of my favorite hobbies and I've learned a lot. And I do believe that synastry is important. I think there is a lot of truth about the interactions between two people. But honestly I don't know about this Horary stuff. I don't like the idea of making life decisions based on a what a chart says. I think what happens in reality and real life should always come first. The part that doesn't make sense to me. Is If you are communicating with someone. Why would you let a chart tell you whether or not you should get involved with them? Whether it be sexually, friendship or whatever else. I think there needs to be a line between astrology and real life. I'm not saying this based on this situation I just mean in general. Maybe Horary isn't for me because I like to live life based on what is actually happening in reality not based on what a chart says. I don't know if that makes sense. I don't like second guessing situations based on a chart. If I would have just went out with him when he first asked me to. Instead of letting astrology dictate my actions I probably wouldn't be in this situation.
 
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