Is the 4th house important in synastry (romance)

What do you think?

Most of the literature I have come across seem to agree that the 4th house is important in close, personal relationships, especially the romantic kind. Personally I agree with this. The 4th house is a water house, so it's emotional, and it's cardinal, so it's naturally a very powerful house. This house rules the home, in the figurative and sometimes even the literal sense. It's where we feel the most comfortable. Its how we are when we are the most relaxed. When we let our guards down in our refuges and homes. I feel that if two people want to build a life together, first they need to be able to let each other into their lives in an intimate way.

However, some posters I have encountered here said that the 4th house is a bad house to have important planets in (especially in house overlay). They seem quite confident about it, so this makes me feel a bit unsure. They said the 1st, 5th and 7th are important, which I totally agree with. But the 4th is somehow a "bad" house.

So what do you think?

"the 4th house is a bad house to have important planets in"

Well now you know you can stop reading those posters.

What you wrote about the 4th house importance is true.
In an intimate relationship, like romance, the 7th-5th-1st are important, but so are the 11th-2nd-4th etc. It all comes together to identify the quality of the relationship, where the easy areas are and what are the potential difficulties.
If two people will be living together, the 4th has a lot to say about their domestic life.

Thanks for re-affirming that the 4th house is important in synastry.

Question though: why are the 2nd and 11th also important? To me they don't seem very relationship-oriented.

The 2nd is not only money, it is self esteem.
The 11th is future and friends, always important.
However, all the others are important as well, depending on where heavy planets fall or difficult aspects occur, they can provoke crisis in a relationship.
You have to really consider the whole picture. You can't judge your relationship only by what happens when you go on vacation together, or by Saturday night pizza with friends, you have to look at when you are working, when you are solving personal problems and need support, when you are being pressured by work overloads, when you have a major decision to make together like buying a house or borrowing money, etc, what does the other help you with, what crisis does the other deepen by their behaviour?
All phases of life, and all 12 houses, are involved.

I see.

So, just out of curiosity, I have a question for you. What has been your personal experience? I know that all houses are important in synastry, but let's say you HAVE TO choose one house. Only one. Which house would you say is the most powerful for you?

For anyone probably the ascendent is the most "powerful".

In a composite chart, planets in the 4th house show helpful or unhelpful influences in sharing a home together. A well-aspected composite moon in the 4th house, for example, would be beneficial.