I appologize. I hadn't logged into my account in a while, and had not received notification email of any new replies. Let's see...I wouldn't consider myself a gambler. I tend to play it safe. My thoughts on success are that a person is successful when they complete a goal that they are pining for. Success I feel is a very personal thing for every individual.
I do like to procrastinate, but usually it is due to my indecisiveness. I put things off until I am 90% sure even though I know that whatever is done cannot be guaranteed 100% success. Otherwise, I put things off that are too boring for me to prioritize over more interesting things. When things are very important to me, I do not procrastinate. Especially, things that I know will cause me great stress if not done ahead of time.
I have grown and greatly matured on my views of romantic relationships. I can't particularly think of a romantic relationship that has scarred me or keeps me from entering into new relationships. However, I can say that I did have situations when I was a child with friends that have scarred me and deterred me from friendly relationships. I have trust issues and find it hard to keep friends because I expect a friend to be every sense of the word. One wrong move and I usually don't give them a second chance. I have never really had a real friend in every sense of the word that wasn't also a romantic partner. Id rather have no friends at all than to have friends that do not truly value me. Luckily, I find plenty of pleasure in my own company.
I am quite reclusive. I love to learn, research, read, write (even though I do not write anymore as much as Id love to have time to.) So I find comfort in knowing that I am not wasting my time in doing these things in my alone time. It is a constant struggle in my relationships with friends and family. They do not understand that I enjoy being alone and do not get lonely. It isn't that I don't enjoy their company (most of the time,) but rather that I have so much that I want to know about the world. I cannot read, think, and ponder over the meaning of life while listening to the latest gossip and pretending to care. It feels like wasted time.
I love the idea of writing if only I could figure out what it is I should focus on writing about. You say it looks like I have a wealth of ideas to write about. This is true. It's just that I have vast variety of ideas and no idea of where to start or how to catagorize them.