Learning Q: Does he love me? (actually her)

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
Hey Hey,

Hope all is well! I've officially dragged my friends into this :) and I'm posting another learning Q and my analysis. This question was asked by my friend. So my analysis will be on behalf of her.

Question: Does he love me?

This is for her current SO, things have been a bit rocky lately but she believes he loves her and frankly, so do I.

My analysis:

Her: Mars & Pluto & the Moon (her emotions)
Him: Venus & the sun (his biological urges)

- Mars and Pluto in Cap:
* Mars feeling great in cap and is exalted so she seems to have strength in this particular situation. She seems to be on a pedestal which is interesting. That tells me that when it comes to love, he sees her as better than she is at this present time, or I guess for better or for worse.
* That being said she is also part triplicity and detriment in Taurus, which is his ruling sign. I'm not entirely sure what to make of this.

- she’s sitting in his 8th house, so something about this/ his feelings for her are secret? The other thing that came to mind is that something about her worries him/ there seems to be some worry about loss./ the last thing that came to mind is some sort of obsession.

- The moon though, her emotions is sitting in his 7th house of partnership.

- he's sitting in her 6th houses of career but I believe she mentioned to me that they met at like some networking event so that makes sense to me. They also seem to be a super intellectual couple, so I sorta see the work overlap, not sure I assessed that correctly.

- moon (her emotions):
* are in scorpio, which is she’s not feeling great about the situation, or she isn’t feeling great about the ‘love that he has shown?’/ him as person/ or maybe it's him loving her because the question is "does he love me". He hasn't told her that he loves her but maybe there's a lack of confidence there?
* Her co-cognifier which is the moon, is exalted, triplicity in his dignities, does that mean that she loves him? Or that he receives her emotions so he loves her?

- His co-ruler would be the sun, and the sun and moon are separating from a trine, that signals to me that there was a positive situation in the past. But the sun is his biological and the moon is her emotional, so... what could this mean?

- His co-signifier the sun is approaching Algol with a sextile, so that tells me at some point he’s losing his head over the situation, but I can't figure out why he would, tbh.

- His co-ruler is the sun, is in faces (in her ruling dignities), the weakest of the dignities, so not much strength there to take any action for whatever reason. Could that also mean that he’s attracted to her?

- The interesting part is the sun is approaching Pluto with a sextile, and the separating from Mars with a sextile. So I wonder if that signals no longer putting her on a pedestal but actually seeing her for who she is.

- Mars and Venus are performing an aspect (approaching trine), so there seems to be some positive communication/ interaction coming from the situation regarding his love for her.

so all in all, maybe its not love but deep care for her?

I wasn't sure tbh and this one was the most complicated of the charts I've analyzed. I think I made it a bit difficult too with my analysis. :crying:

Screen Shot 2020-03-15 at 1.16.08 PM.jpg
Screen Shot 2020-03-14 at 9.18.48 PM.png
 
Last edited:

Bunraku

Well-known member
It looks like they're in a really rough patch. Moon opposed Venus in Venus' sign of fall. A fight happened or what?

Receptions aren't too hot either. Mars currently dislikes Venus, while Venus feels neutral towards Mars.

Venus is the guy, in the 6th which is a cadent place is trying to catch up to make an aspect to Mars, but Mars is moving too fast for Venus to catch up. Venus is strong, but is cadent, so can't do much action-wise, as willing as Venus is.

So it seems like whatever he(Venus) tries to do it will just be out of reach for him because Mars is on its own path looking forward.

Mars also seem like they feel justified (exaltations->confidence).
 
Last edited:

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
They are in a rough patch. She essentially feels like he betrayed her. I don't know if I would exactly say it like that because they were on a break, but she's internalized it that way. I respect it because the same thing happened to me and I also flipped my ****. But I feel like she really loves him too, she's just super upset with the way things have gone. Like she says she loves him. And her/I believe that he loves her.
 
Last edited:

ElenaJ

Well-known member
You entered Algol in the chart, but it might be more helpful instead to have Amor, Union, since this is what we are looking at here.
Ceres isn't integrated in the chart, it could be eliminated to not have too much clutter.
 

ElenaJ

Well-known member
The significators of the two are mars/pluto and Venus.
Mars and Venus look like they are coming to a trine, but this is deceptive because they won't perfect the aspect before mars leaves Capricorn.
Venus however will trine Pluto, which is a very positive sign.
The moon symbolises emotions, yes, but in a horary it signifies the thing you ask about, the action or event, and acts as a timer.
Do you know by chance if 22 or 28 scorpio correspond to anything in her natal chart?
Scorpio is a sign that lashes out its tail and stings when threatened, and holds a grudge, and will even hurt itself to get revenge.
She is asking about whether he loves her, so moon is pointing to her, the question pivots around her, she is concerned about herself, about receiving love from him.
She as mars is in her 2nd house, why? This is her place of values, including self esteem. Her self esteem is at play here. In reality she is strong in Capricorn, but Capricorn is ambitious and wants its value.
As a side note, remember to enter the south node as well as the north node. In this case, you would see where the south node of past karma lies... in the 2nd, again we are seeing self esteem that needs healing.
And Chiron, the wounded healer, the asteroid of learning through pain, is in the degree of the nodes, which is a fated link, your friend could do little about the situation, it was already set up and waiting to happen.
So your friend has been forced to pass through this situation, being forced to feel the pain, so she can better understand herself, her own self worth and self esteem, and through this pain better understand her own value, and similarly that of her partner. He has north node in his 2nd, his ego was not bruised, and she should learn from this, she needs to steer herself towards that position, learning that her self value does not depend on the actions of the other.
Her 2nd is ruled by Jupiter, and mars is closing in on Jupiter, seeking to repair the damage to her sense of self worth.
Before this happens, though, mars is actually in contact with Neptune of betrayal, deception, delusion, and conjunct the IC, cusp of endings. Again, mars shows bruised feelings, evidently from what she sees as betrayal and is thinking about ending it all because of this.
What is Venus doing in the meantime? She is strong in taurus, sitting tight and secure of herself in a fixed sign.
Venus has passed the conjunction with freedom loving, rebellious Uranus, so the need for a bit of liberty has run its course, but Venus is still in the partner's turned 12th house of introspection. Venus is using this time to look inward, analysing and weighing up emotions, hiding from sight, closed in on itself. Venus however, in taurus, is loving and caring.
Venus as we saw above tries to approach mars but doesn't quite make it, but she does reach Pluto by trine, so he does care for her and manages to patch things up somewhat.
Pluto (like mars) is in the natural house of Venus, so sitting where Venus feels comfortable, waiting for her and welcoming her.
So what is moon doing?
We saw it is pointing us to ask about the ascendent/querent, in her fall in scorpio, weak by sign, thinking about revenge, and sex.
Moon approaches a sextile with stabilising Saturn, disciplined, reliable, serious, the teacher who rules the 3rd house, sitting on the cusp, through both Capricorn and Aquarius (who is intercepted there). The 3rd house is communication. So moon will need to talk things out, will need to reason and find solid roots in the way your friend thinks. This is not easy for your friend, in fact moon will square mercury (again thinking and communication), always in the 3rd house, emphasising that she is being pressured to do it, but she shouldn't resist. Then she contacts Saturn the teacher.
Note that Chiron (the wounded healer) and Lilith, the goddess of sex, are conjunct, in the 4th of childhood and close to the cusp of your friend's 5th house of romance, love, affection, romantic sex.
Again the same theme returns, she has to work this out and get to the root of the problem in order to resolve the current situation.
Otherwise it will return again, perhaps not with this partner but with another new partner.
It's a karmic need that she must satisfy to regain her equilibrium and happiness.
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
Hey Elena J, thank you so much for the help! That's totally correct. They sorta were having issues, took some space and he was with someone during that time. she feels super betrayed by it. I'm going to read through this analysis right now and compare it to mine!
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
"Mars and Venus look like they are coming to a trine, but this is deceptive because they won't perfect the aspect before mars leaves Capricorn."- it's because it's showing -9 in the chart right? Anytime there is a negative number/degree it is showing that there is an aspect that won't actually come to fruition right?
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
"Venus as we saw above tries to approach mars but doesn't quite make it, but she does reach Pluto by trine, so he does care for her and manages to patch things up somewhat." I have a quick question. How come we know that he cares for her but we can't actually say that he loves her? Would the chart have more clear indicators if it was specifically about love?

I have no idea about her natal chart, but I'm going to message her to pull it to send it to me so I can take a look.

Also, complete side note, but she keeps saying that he's her soul mate. So I find is fascinating that there is some karmic component to their relationship!

Also, I'm sorta sad to see that he's doing fine at this time with his north node and not being bruised. I mean, I understand it within the context of the entire analysis but at the same time, she's really taken it badly and he's just cruising on the side.
 
Last edited:

ElenaJ

Well-known member
"Mars and Venus look like they are coming to a trine, but this is deceptive because they won't perfect the aspect before mars leaves Capricorn."- it's because it's showing -9 in the chart right? Anytime there is a negative number/degree it is showing that there is an aspect that won't actually come to fruition right?

No. I don't know where you found this, but it's simply because mars leaves Capricorn before Venus gets to him.
Just check the ephemeris.
 

ElenaJ

Well-known member
"Venus as we saw above tries to approach mars but doesn't quite make it, but she does reach Pluto by trine, so he does care for her and manages to patch things up somewhat." I have a quick question. How come we know that he cares for her but we can't actually say that he loves her? Would the chart have more clear indicators if it was specifically about love?

It could be "love", I used the word "care" because it is only half of her significators that will be reached by him, it isn't as strong a contact as it could be.

I have no idea about her natal chart, but I'm going to message her to pull it to send it to me so I can take a look.

If you can, this would possibly tie her to the horary. If she has those scorpio traits somewhere.

Also, complete side note, but she keeps saying that he's her soul mate. So I find is fascinating that there is some karmic component to their relationship!

Careful, the karma I referred to is her experience in learning from the relationship.
Which doesn't say yes or no about being soul mates. You can check their synastry for that, see if there are contacts between their nodes and planets.


Also, I'm sorta sad to see that he's doing fine at this time with his north node and not being bruised.

He doesn't need to learn from this, he's already resolved it internally. Don't wish him ill just because he doesn't have this problem.

I mean, I understand it within the context of the entire analysis but at the same time, she's really taken it badly and he's just cruising on the side.

She needs to do some work to resolve the conflicts she has in herself.
They don't necessarily have to suffer together, do they?

PS. if as you later wrote they had agreed to have a trial separation, each was free to do and meet and contact and be free in their lives. He did this, as was agreed between them.
She didn't, her choice, but holds him guilty for having done it even though that was their agreement... freedom from the relationship for a bit.
Also, remember, a male reacts differently than a female. It's inbred. Do we really know how serious his contacts were? Maybe he was just letting off male hormones, experimenting. Do you know?
So she was apparently sitting back, apparently agreeing on the surface to each doing their own thing, but inside making it a test of his love for her... will he go with someone else, or won't he? Hmmm. He did! So she feels betrayed. Very female. It was just a trap.
Consider this situation, if I am reading it correctly.
Her sense of ownership was betrayed.
She has to face this and come to terms with it. Otherwise, as I wrote with reference to the chart, this trait of hers will come out again, either with him or in the future with someone else.
But it is coming from inside her, it is her problem, not his. She has to dig deep down and come to grips with it within herself.
The situation evidently touched her sense of self, which was found lacking, and bruised her ego. It brought out her insecurities.
She has to replay the film and reset her emotional base and values. The work, karmic, is hers to do.
He may have problems, other ones, but this is not one of his problems.

Which is why it also came out in the chart that she needs to communicate and change her way of thinking about the situation.
 
Last edited:

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
Under my impression, it seemed like at some point my friend and him would break up entirely because I thought he was moving on with some other girl tbh. It seemed like he was trying to manage both of them. Now, I don't even think him and her (the other chick) are in contact anymore. So I can't say if it was a fling or if she ( the other girl) ended things and pushed him away. I've always wondered about that, the only thing I'm pretty sure of is they aren't together. I noticed that the girl unfollowed him on instagram and everything.
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
I think what happened was she agreed to the break and also both of them seeing other people but then PANICKED when he meets some super educated, beautiful chick who happens to be his same background. The girl, from my instagram creeping, also is very introverted like him. So on the surface, it looked like he had finally met his match in some capacity and my friend took it really hard. I personally think he's always deeply had feelings for my friend and she's special to him, but the breakdown of their relationship played out almost like a self fulfilling prophecy. The more she was upset and would tug at him, the more he would back away and not really speak to what was happening with this other girl. (I'm not sure if there's other women tbh) I think my friend was so fixated on just the one because that's who she felt threatened by. Again, speaking to that ego and self worth.

Anyway, she snapped one day and stung him hard (referencing your scorpio comment)-- she sent me the conversation and it was vicious (which was why I assumed to see some sort of pain coming from his side). You could tell she was hurting.
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
Also, thank you so much for the analysis, its really in-depth and so helpful. I read it and re-read it and I'll continue to study it for sure. I keep thinking when I go through it that I don't even know where to start with that depth, but its super helpful to see the way you thought it out so I have reference points when I'm trying to as well.
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
I have an additional question, is there any particular significance to her sitting in his 8th house. That house is so painful and filled with loss.
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
Also, I re-casted the chart and Amor is also in the second house with her! Venus looks to be approaching Amor with a trine. There's no aspects with union but it's sitting in the 11th house with juno and both seems to be in retrograde. not sure if that has any particular significance.

Screen Shot 2020-03-15 at 1.16.08 PM.jpg
 

WisdomJoy

Well-known member
If it's in her second house, does that mean she attaches the idea of love to self esteem and worth? But if it's in his 8th house, does that mean he attaches it to the idea of loss and death? (If so, that makes sense to me because she mentioned that he was in one serious partnership and it never worked out. I don't know if they married and divorce, engagement or just serious with each other.)
 

ElenaJ

Well-known member
Also, I re-casted the chart and Amor is also in the second house with her! Venus looks to be approaching Amor with a trine. There's no aspects with union but it's sitting in the 11th house with juno and both seems to be in retrograde. not sure if that has any particular significance.

Yes, Venus approaches Amor by trine, and this reconfirms to us that he reaches out to her and cares.
Also, she as mars is tied to Amor in her house of self esteem.
So we return to the idea that she has this inner conflict, fragile self esteem that she has to resolve.
 
Top