I will give a try allthough i think you are going to laugh.
You Moon, 3rd house Mercury, there is an oppo between Moon and Mercury. No
Jupiter near the Asc but a retro one and conjuct by a separate aspect so no help. No
Mercury on the end of 8th house. No
Moon on the 2nd house, on Leo not so much move. No
Ascendant conjuct Sirius. Yes
Both Moon and Mercury are peregrine, Mercury is and combust
4 No and 1 Yes. So...NO
Is SF a place in northeast? If so things are different.