Aloha everyone,
Long time lurker posting for the first time - I wanted to get the feedback of truly passionate Astro buffs rather than pay for Astro business majors who will tell me **** they pulled out of googlebirthchart.com.
Last year I made this huge jump, decided to follow my passion and get out of corporate, move closer to my family in Europe and just focus on my art and self development praxis. Prior all went super smooth and since I'd had a seriously rough few years I took it to mean the tides were in my favor.
The moment I landed it began- since I have been here I'm constantly sick, im insomniac, anxiety, depression - like stuff I didn't even know I could have : I mentally do not recognize myself and sometimes feel like I'm losing my mind like this the planetary transit of she's gone friggin bonkers. And nothing seems to be working out : my business is deplorable it's actually quite funny to watch it's so pathetic, I am officially at borrow money from my parents broke level and I recently got scammed ( even though I really checked ) and now there's a legal situation that has me as the main defendant ( I actually am like the most non criminal person you've ever met it's also quite amusing to find myself in this situation ) .. so basically I'm a point where I don't know if my birth chart predicted that life hated me and my soul coming here was a trap, if moving countries was a bad decision or if this is the beginning of my transformation into Gollum preparing to mypreeecciioouusss my way into the rest of my life.
I want to leave in about 3 months to another continent... I don't know if I should just stop pretending I'm Oprah and get a day job, or if I can pretend I'm Oprah and just needed to be somewhere else and push through .... or if Oprah has nothing to do with anything so I should just call myself delusional and start popping Valium. I can accept being an employee for life if I don't have what it takes to entrepreneur it ... but the gamble to find out from where I'm sitting right now is not what's happening.
Oh I'm also recovering from crushing over a Scorpio ( I know ... has 50 shades of grey thought me nothing ?!! Queue sad piano for soundtrack purposes) I changed his life for the better ( really I did ) and he scorpio'd his way through so I had to shut him out before reaching forgethershesbonkers level. So he decided to marry a little woman with the body shape of a boy bless her ( the exact opposite of me ).. So part of me is practicing the acceptance of the fact that I'm never finding love in my life because Gollum lives in a cave and that's no place to live a healthy marriage nor raise normal children. 34 never had a committed relationship although approached by dudes constantly ... that's got to be some kind of record of wtf is wrong with me right ?
I had even had a reading on new year and this lady said my year would amazing and Jupiter was returning. This year's so far been a major gong show and Jupiter must have missed his flight because he ghosted.
So I'll take anything at this point. I just need some clarity for my mercurial neptunesque mind and that darn habit of idealizing but also all over the placing I have. I have attached my chart too..
I'm a bit like Chandler humor helps me filter through the drama... there are great things in my life too ..it's just getting a bit harder to focus on them with all the nonsense. Me and my crazy thank you in advance for your time, patience and guidance P.
Long time lurker posting for the first time - I wanted to get the feedback of truly passionate Astro buffs rather than pay for Astro business majors who will tell me **** they pulled out of googlebirthchart.com.
Last year I made this huge jump, decided to follow my passion and get out of corporate, move closer to my family in Europe and just focus on my art and self development praxis. Prior all went super smooth and since I'd had a seriously rough few years I took it to mean the tides were in my favor.
The moment I landed it began- since I have been here I'm constantly sick, im insomniac, anxiety, depression - like stuff I didn't even know I could have : I mentally do not recognize myself and sometimes feel like I'm losing my mind like this the planetary transit of she's gone friggin bonkers. And nothing seems to be working out : my business is deplorable it's actually quite funny to watch it's so pathetic, I am officially at borrow money from my parents broke level and I recently got scammed ( even though I really checked ) and now there's a legal situation that has me as the main defendant ( I actually am like the most non criminal person you've ever met it's also quite amusing to find myself in this situation ) .. so basically I'm a point where I don't know if my birth chart predicted that life hated me and my soul coming here was a trap, if moving countries was a bad decision or if this is the beginning of my transformation into Gollum preparing to mypreeecciioouusss my way into the rest of my life.
I want to leave in about 3 months to another continent... I don't know if I should just stop pretending I'm Oprah and get a day job, or if I can pretend I'm Oprah and just needed to be somewhere else and push through .... or if Oprah has nothing to do with anything so I should just call myself delusional and start popping Valium. I can accept being an employee for life if I don't have what it takes to entrepreneur it ... but the gamble to find out from where I'm sitting right now is not what's happening.
Oh I'm also recovering from crushing over a Scorpio ( I know ... has 50 shades of grey thought me nothing ?!! Queue sad piano for soundtrack purposes) I changed his life for the better ( really I did ) and he scorpio'd his way through so I had to shut him out before reaching forgethershesbonkers level. So he decided to marry a little woman with the body shape of a boy bless her ( the exact opposite of me ).. So part of me is practicing the acceptance of the fact that I'm never finding love in my life because Gollum lives in a cave and that's no place to live a healthy marriage nor raise normal children. 34 never had a committed relationship although approached by dudes constantly ... that's got to be some kind of record of wtf is wrong with me right ?
I had even had a reading on new year and this lady said my year would amazing and Jupiter was returning. This year's so far been a major gong show and Jupiter must have missed his flight because he ghosted.
So I'll take anything at this point. I just need some clarity for my mercurial neptunesque mind and that darn habit of idealizing but also all over the placing I have. I have attached my chart too..
I'm a bit like Chandler humor helps me filter through the drama... there are great things in my life too ..it's just getting a bit harder to focus on them with all the nonsense. Me and my crazy thank you in advance for your time, patience and guidance P.