trying to understand my cap moon boyfriend

My boyfriend's moon is in capricorn (in the 8th), with cap also on the cusp of his 7th house. I'm ready to get married, he keeps putting me off with "Now's not a good time to make s decision." My gut sense is that he doesn't want to lose the relationship but is scared to death of moving into a commited phase.

Gemini sun sign, he loves to talk about doing things. Actually doing things is not his forte, though.

He's also got the moon opp venus (within 1 degree) -- could that be influencing things?

Our sun & venus are conjunct in the synastry chart, but our sun and moons square each other. A relationship full of tests _and_ potential.

Thanks--

LibraDragon

Hi there,

A Cap Moon might be that extra bit precautious about taking a big step or a new step, but usually doesn't shy away from commitments, in fact, anything to further cement a relationship is usually more their thing (here's a Cap Moon talking), as fear of losing what they have is one of their biggest anxieties. I think in your BF's case, the Gemini Sun might be the 'dodgy' factor, like the indecisiveness, but then again, there might also be other aspects in the chart to make him waver.

aquarius7000

Hello LibraDragon, well, I have a son with Moon in Capricorn and he had no intention of marrying, but when he had to leave the country (no more workpermit in the USA,) he had to leave her behind. The idea to leave his girlfriend of 4 years behind was too much and he married her within 3 days!! One day after that they both came to Switzerland! He has his Moon in the 5th and he is incredibly romantic, even now after 8 years of marriage he still invents the most original birthday presents and other surprises.

But a Moon in the 8th like your boyfriend has, shows a worrier and in Capricorn even more. He must be very responsable and a marriage to him is a huge responsability and he probably wants to be sure he can carry that. There could be a lot of fear about this inside him.

He's also got the moon opp venus (within 1 degree) -- could that be influencing things?

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Maybe,that depends on the rest of the chart of course. Usually a Venus-Moon opposition can shows that the person needs a partner who does not need obvious love expression from him but who can give love it to him!
With a Gemini Sun he might be flirtatious and in need of sexual experimentation because he can be quickly bored with one relationship.
Moon in the 8th is also strongly sensual when backed up by that opposition to Venus. Maybe he knows this of himself and does not want to take the risk of (maybe) one day having a fling with someone else when he is already married. His responsability towards you prevents him therefore from taking this risk whereby he could hurt you (and that is the last thing a Moon in Capricorn wants to do). This is of course speculation from my side, but with this constellation and the 8th house involved, I might be right.
A Moon in the 8th house is like a Moon in Scorpio in a way. He does not show what he really is thinking; it will be hard to get to know the real "him"-

Starlink

Lots is resonating here. The worrier, hard to get to know. He says he wants a stable long-term relationship, but has been unwilling so far to take the steps to get there.

looking at the chart again... his Mars is in the 5th in Libra. And square to both his Venus and Moon. And old Saturn (just barely) square Venus.

That Mars in Libra in the 5th has had me wondering from the start if this is a guy I can really count on in the long term to not have affairs. His cap moon is really strong, though, and I think if he knows it'd be throwing away our relationship that he wouldn't cheat. I'm less clear on how to read the squares.

Thanks for the thoughts --

LibraDragon

then this is a T-square he has, Moon Venus, and pointing to Mars. That Mars in Libra is a release of this T-square as far as I know, and quite different in nature then both Cap moon and Cancer venus. Sounds like he's maybe trying very hard not to live those martian tendencies up, knowing it is not good, and dicipline himself into being good. but...? you have every right to wonder.

if he's putting you off, you sure don't want to force him into something he's not ready for yet.

My experience with Cap Moon guys is they have real trouble grasping and talking about their emotions(sometimes even having emotions!) and they sometimes do what they think they should do without feeling the inner need to do so. That always puts me off of them

hermetic said:

then this is a T-square he has, Moon Venus, and pointing to Mars. That Mars in Libra is a release of this T-square as far as I know, and quite different in nature then both Cap moon and Cancer venus. Sounds like he's maybe trying very hard not to live those martian tendencies up, knowing it is not good, and dicipline himself into being good. but...? you have every right to wonder.

if he's putting you off, you sure don't want to force him into something he's not ready for yet.

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Yes -- 2 T-squares, actually. Moon Venus pointing ot Mars, Saturn (in Aries!) and Mars pointing to Venus.

He can have an explosive temper but has worked (very successfully) with meditation on that. Still, I can't have a conversation about this without setting off "What's the hurry" even though he'll say 30 minutes he wants a long-term stable relationship. I'm feeling a bit confused and crazy with it all!

What do you think of potential for affairs with that T-square, (with Saturn opp Mars but _not_ making a grand square)?

Just like he has been really successful with meditation in controlling anger, i know he believes he can grow and evolve tremendously through this relationship (same goes for me) -- he's just waffling on making the transition into marriage, always needing more time.

Thanks so much,

LibraDragon

I already answered one of your other threads...look and see
where your Juno's are..it will help with the marriage question.

Well. Cappy is all about practical. So, he knows he would fail if he did it now. They try to do things when there is little or no chance of failure. When he is secure and you can benefit him as well is when he will do it.

AquariusT said:

Well. Cappy is all about practical. So, he knows he would fail if he did it now. They try to do things when there is little or no chance of failure. When he is secure and you can benefit him as well is when he will do it.

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Of course -- that's what the stumbling block is. He wants to be certain it will work. Thanks for the reminder.

Juno-- I've not worked with this much. Mine is the in the 2nd in Sag, his in the 3rd in Libra conjunct IC.

Regarding Juno, his is more important to look at in synastry cause it represents a wife. If his Juno conjuncs one of your personal planets, or ASC it can be a good sign.

hermetic said:

Regarding Juno, his is more important to look at in synastry cause it represents a wife. If his Juno conjuncs one of your personal planets, or ASC it can be a good sign.

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My Mars is conjunct his Juno. Now sure what to make of that?

hermetic said:

Regarding Juno, his is more important to look at in synastry cause it represents a wife. If his Juno conjuncs one of your personal planets, or ASC it can be a good sign.

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With your Mars conjunct his Juno...you definetly will be inclined to view him as "the one"...for marriage...

This is where is gets a little tricky....

I have done some research on this regarding relationships and it can play out in a multiple of different ways, but what I do is look for links BEYOND straight chart aspects...e.g. juno in relation to midpoints and then hits between your natal chart and his 7th and 9th harmonic chart..and then his natal chart to you 7th and 9th harmonic chart.

There has to be some type of recipricol action going on...
For instance if your Sun/Moon midpoint opposes his juno, he wouldn't be holding of with the marriage I can tell you that...
so in effect what you would be looking for is DEPTH between the charts.
The initial aspects start things off and the other nuiances culminate
the charts by repeating through OTHER areas.
My husband and I have difficult mercury aspects which means we
have difficulties Listening AND understanding each other...what I say to
him, he may hear something other than what my meaning actual is....
but because I know this, I take great care in making my points, which
he can find irritating at times, but otherwise we have trouble.
But my Juno is opposite his Sun/Moon midpoint/7th harmonic...
we dated 3 times and made arrangements to get married in 3 months...
we have been married for 32 years...
We also have 8th house recipricol SUN placements.

What I can tell you is that a Capricorn Moon or Venus is EXTREMELY loyal and will work at having the relationship, even in the hard times.

If you do get married..be sure to watch yourself every 7 years from your
marriage date...the hardest time will be during those periods...7,14,21 and 28.5...that is why people refer to the "7year itch"..it is the cycle of saturn
and it brings difficulties and responsiblity...most people will either
get married, buy a house or have a baby during their Natal return of Saturn which is between 28-29 years of age...We got our first house and had
our first child during that cycle. Being a Cap moon it may happen for him
during one of those periods, the other time would be during a Jupiter natal return.

Pallas, can you explain a bit about the significance of the Sun/Moon midpoint? It looks like my sun/moon midpoint is directly conjunct (within 1 degree) of his DC -- does that have any significance?

My Sun is also opp his juno. Since his Vertex is opp his juno, that puts his Vertex conj my sun.

What I can tell you is that a Capricorn Moon or Venus is EXTREMELY loyal and will work at having the relationship, even in the hard times.

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That is deeply reassuring. Thank you.

hey pallas. you seem to have an good understanding of juno. it was my thread that you had made the comment about juno. i was wondering if you could say a little more about it.

i looked up juno in synastry, and i'm not finding much on it.

my juno is 15 libra
hers in 9 leo

her juno is about 5 degrees inside my first house. i wondered if that was significant at all. i can't find anything on the web about it. it actually looked important.

mine is her 5th house.

how would this be interepted?

thanks. and thanks for replying to my thread too.

libradragon said:

Pallas, can you explain a bit about the significance of the Sun/Moon midpoint? It looks like my sun/moon midpoint is directly conjunct (within 1 degree) of his DC -- does that have any significance?

My Sun is also opp his juno. Since his Vertex is opp his juno, that puts his Vertex conj my sun.

That is deeply reassuring. Thank you.

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Conjuctions and oppositions have the strongest impacts on midpoints..
and are attractors between harmonious planets.

Sun/Moon midpoint - Here is where you show your undertanding of others, or life. It is the attention you place on whatever is important to you in life.
Or the complete opposite of this, depending on the aspects to this point.
It is the approval you give or recieve to or with another.

With it conj his DC (in the 7th?) which is his house of partnerships(romantic or business)there is a strong pull here to complete that partnership.

Think of the Sun opp juno as comparable to Sun opp Venus...only has
a stronger marriage connection. Vertex conjuctions or oppositons of venus, juno or placement can be almost like a fascination with marriage.
Not necessarily a fascination to marry.

There is definetly attraction here. But remember just attraction alone
doesn't necessarily make a good marriage. Also if you plan your marriage
take the time to have a pro do an Electional chart for the best days available in your time frame..
that day will be the marriages "birthday" - it will give you both extra
help if it is a benefitial day..not fool proof, just helpful.
Just something to keep in mind.

Libra Guy said:

hey pallas. you seem to have an good understanding of juno. it was my thread that you had made the comment about juno. i was wondering if you could say a little more about it.

i looked up juno in synastry, and i'm not finding much on it.

my juno is 15 libra
hers in 9 leo

her juno is about 5 degrees inside my first house. i wondered if that was significant at all. i can't find anything on the web about it. it actually looked important.

mine is her 5th house.

how would this be interepted?

thanks. and thanks for replying to my thread too.

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I think I replied in relationships...check back to me if I didn't answer
your question...