Cancer Sun Cursed With Venus and Mars in Gemini.

Cancer is known as a very homely, loyal, and devoted sign. You can't control when you're born, and in some years the stars really like to do everything they can to ***** you over. If astronomy is man's attempt to reach the universe, sometimes astrology feels like the universe's way of reaching you AND doing everything it can to mess you up. One such year where the stars wreaked havoc during the summer months was 1996, the year of my birth. Due to my premature birth (and it was an emergency that nearly killed my mom, she was rushed to the hospital), I was born as a Cancer sun on July 3 BUT with the dreaded Venus and Mars in Gemini placements. Had I been born on the scheduled / approximate date of birth, I would likely have ended up as a Virgo with Venus in Cancer. Mars sign, I'm not sure where Mars was at in early September of 1996.

I really, really wish I had Venus in Taurus, Cancer, or Virgo, or Leo. I really wish I had Mars in Leo or a feminine sign. My Venus and Mars are conjunct each other as well. From a lot of what I've read Venus and Mars in Gemini are ill-reputed placements known to produce players and cheaters. I'm only 22 now, but today I was thinking about my disloyal behavior towards my two exes when I was 18-20, and I couldn't help but think about my Venus and Mars in Gemini.

I did indeed go through that unsettled phase of my life, and thinking back there were many reasons why I was so restless:
1. Maybe I was just too young and didn't know what I really wanted in a woman, so I talked to many girls (usually over the internet).
2. I'm an introvert at heart and I had a late exposure to relationships, so I really wanted to play the field during my late teenage years.
3. I could not commit to either of my exes because I had too many anxieties and insecurities in my own mind, I was facing troubled times going to college alone in a foreign country, and the demons of my difficult past were still haunting me.
4. I didn't appreciate my exes for the strong women they were, because as an unsure and troubled young man I had subscribed to the Red Pill school of thought. In my mind, I had the paranoia that both of my exes, who were somewhat ambitious (but loving and devoted) women, would one day look down on me and leave me. Now I know a lot better and how wrong I was.
5. None of the women I talked to online I got sexual with in communication, it was mostly in the mind. I looked for stimulation, an escape from the mundane and anxious life I had. Some of those women were from foreign countries that I idealized without knowing much about the culture or what I really wanted deep down, so I wasted a lot of time that could have been spent being 100% devoted to my exes.
6. Perhaps what I was really looking for was just a sheer novelty factor without any realistic plan or soul-searching into myself. I was looking for something to escape the unhappy and troubled life I was having.
7. Both of my relationships were long distance for a large portion of the time I was with those women. Distance without a very strong foundation to begin with is a total killer. I will NEVER want another long-distance relationship.

Even today I still haven't completely gotten over those two women. The sense of guilt remains, and whether they've moved on or not I feel that I am almost entirely to blame. I'd like to believe it was a combination of my age, my mental state of the time, and the life I was living that led to an inability to commit. Even 3 years later I still view it as a blemish in my life, though I think for many people who went through a similar stage it's no big deal to them, but it is a big deal for me.

What I really want more than anything else is love, loyalty, stability, to look after and to be looked after and protected. As I grow older the desire only gets stronger. However, I'm afraid that my Venus and Mars in Gemini will return to wreak havoc in my life. If there are any reassuring factors in my chart, or any offsetting factors specifically related to my Venus / Mars in Gemini and my Gemini descendant, please let me know what your thoughts are.

I was also told by a fellow member that transiting Neptune was squaring my Venus 2-3 years ago, and looking back I was indeed chasing girls who were living far away that I had no realistic chance of meeting while neglecting the women in my life who were close to me and loved me. I loved them back, of course, and was devoted and caring to them, but I was also too troubled. Reflecting on my life so far, sometimes I DO have the unfortunate tendency to like (but not love, because love is much deeper and takes much more time to develop) girls who are "inaccessible" in some way, such as having a boyfriend. I realize I'm not the kind of person who'd actually break up another relationship, it's just those one-sided feelings in me. That's also not what I want. I'm trying to harness the power of Saturn to keep me grounded.

Even though I am loyal and want to be loyal at heart, it still pains me to have had this phase in my youth because I keep imagining that things could have been better.

I can see Cancer Mercury is causing you distress, being the point of a yod. A yod is a highly karmic placement and you will bump into problems repeatedly until you learn the lesson the yod tries to teach you. Oftentimes the lesson can be spotted in your problem because of the repetitive nature of the problem.

What pattern do you notice in your relationship? Is it about miscommunication? Are the people you meet too detached for you? Are you too possessive for them? Pluto sextile Uranus in the yod indicates extremity and unpredictability, and Cancer Mercury isn't best known for being objective. Cancer is possessive, not in the controlling way of Scorpio, but because it needs to feel safe. I'm guessing that you want a partner that understand you, make you feel safe, and support your emotional need. But you can't find one like that and you get frustrated. I think the lesson here is to accept that there is no such thing as a "perfect" relationship. Your partner is going to disappoint you one way or another. And you have to use your sensitivity to nurture others, not to keep them in a cage to satisfy your need for emotional stability. There is this fable about a girl who accidentally crushes her bird to death while she tries to stop it from flying out of its cage. Use this to remind yourself that sometimes the best way to hold on is to let go.

But this is going to take a lot of effort from you. You have Cancer Sun in a T-square with Jupiter and Saturn, a constant battle between being hard on yourself and being full of hope. You also has a lot of inconjunct in your chart. I'm especially interested in the Sun inconjunct Moon one. You are clearly struggling between being a caring homely person and an independent detached rebel. You can't choose between the two because that will frustrate the unchosen planet. In the end you have to find a middle ground. You have to accept that you both want a stable relationship while being independent. Maybe a distant relationship can help? You could be caring and at the same time not get too involved in someone's life, they are not mutually exclusive.

In what ways do you think the T-square may affect my life, and what lessons do I have to learn? What can I become once the T-square is channeled properly?

Also, according to Astrodienst with the Walter Pullen option that gives planet and sign strength, I am shocked to know that once aspects to the angular points and asteroids are included, my strongest sign is Libra at 14.2%, followed by Aries at 12.2%, then Aquarius and Cancer both at 11.9%, and then Capricorn at 10.5%. According to the software Cancer is only my 4th strongest sign, but I don't have a single placement in Libra other than Sun and Mercury both in House VII, and Moon Trine Descendant, Venus and Mars both Conjunct the Descendant. That's actually quite a lot of 7th house stuff going on.

What do you guys think of my chart overall? Would you say it's easy or complicated compared to other charts you've seen? Will this life be a hard one for me?

My dominant planets according to the calculator are Venus, Jupiter, Saturn, and the Moon. My Sun and Mercury are in House VII, Moon in II, Venus and Mars in VI, Jupiter in I, Saturn in IV, Uranus and Neptune are in II and Pluto is in XII. As you can see, out of the 4 dominant planets in my chart, 3/4 are in "feminine" houses despite them being in masculine signs. I've always suspected why my psyche is so feminine despite my overall chart being 60/40 in the masculine-feminine.

for some reason i might suggest you this blog post i find informative about the aspect types and their mechanics

https://www.astrologyweekly.com/learn-astrology/inner-outer.php

You will find Square, T-Square, Grand Cross they are all familliar for some reason... Don't you think T-squares would be like 3-legged table example
While Focal one on the middle.. that
will literally be scapegoat that suffers from the general tension or either he's the boss can launch you to the moon

as for Pullen calculation btw.. it is interesting but it will stay as way too "statistical" way more Modern Astrology thing you know
still just a robotic and sometimes weird scoring...

AS for general remark not only me most give extra value for charts include T-squares, Grand Trines....as meaningful charts some views YOD's as different level..for me your chart little bit easy a little complicated but not extreme for my level i have seen many but when you see my chart this time you will probably consider yours as trash ...having dozens of aspects doesnt mean your have no weakness and problems.

i said Pullen scores only for planet itself not it's actual functionality within the Chart.. for example my mars is taurus i still got quite high score because it's rich by aspects and house placement and such... But it can be problematic placement.....traditional dignities and debilities should have been taken into account..


When you say femininty . Water plus Air types often tends like more connected to others they are skilled with diplomatic abilities i believe

while the opposite Earth fire type are like traditional type of masculine choleric personality i guess. "they are more like initiators"

So if you admit that by yourself then Saturn Aries is there for improve your Masculine concsiousness that will be answer of your question and that t-square they are affects you in that way...

as saturn always give extreme trouble at first it's always the symbol of brutal reality even in our individual charts you can't prosecute it to anyone you be rather accept what you gonna deal. that is your ultimate weakness

you have two way in this journey when you experience saturn.. you totally surrender or you get ambitious more and more and build strong confident in you.

declaring the world as not FAIR place to be is a dmn key for developing such mindset anyway imma out to bed hope you find useful

I don't get why you think having your Mars and Venus in Gemini is bad. To me they seem to complement your emotional Sun in Cancer very well with their airy detachment.

Having the Venus in Gemini is especially good, I believe. It is the sign of a social butterfly.

I think I was a bit of a social butterfly (but mainly online) when I was a bit younger, I didn't know what I really wanted and being an introvert I naturally had a later exposure to relationships so I think the Venus + my emotional and moody Cancer sun + the difficult circumstances I was in all contributed to a flirty phase for me that I deeply regret. It was a waste of time and everything and I still struggle with feelings of guilt, though I am a lot more settled today.

Venus in Gemini, or teenage problems? Or both? Maybe I was just young, troubled, and not mature enough.

I'm Half Cursed ?

Cancer Sun.
Mars in Libra.
Venus and Moon in Gemini.
NN and Mercury in Cancer.