Romancing with Venus-Uranus people. Trines and Sextiles don't count!

virgo18

Well-known member
Are you a Venus (hard aspect) Uranus person? or Have you ever dated or were in a relationship with someone who has this aspect? This people can be a headache in relationships sometimes, or relationships can be a headache for them:

-Venus conjunct Uranus
-Venus square Uranus
-Venus opposition Uranus

If you are a Venus-Uranus person, do you....:
1. Get bored quickly of the one you love?
2. fall in love with people that you can't have completely? (married, live too far away, they are not into you, etc?
3. Prefer unconventional people or relationships?
4. If someone tries to chase you no matter if that someone is handsome, you run away?
5. feel stalked when you are with someone who needs more contact than what you need?
6. start flirting with other people when your relationship start to be boring, or if your partner becomes too demanding?
7. Call and see you loved one every second day or third day? Because you need a lot of time alone?
8. can't live without your loved one but you can't live with him/her?
9. unlike sticky, emotional, and controlling people?
10. You prefer to chat or text messaging than calling on the phone with you loved one?
11. You unlike affectionate demonstrations in public?
12. You prefer to remain single? If not, you prefer unconventional marriage? like open marriages and separated rooms?

If you dont have this aspect, but you dated or date someone who has them:
How do you feel with them?

Venus-Uranus aspects will act the same, no matter in what sing Venus is. But it can intensify in some Venus signs like Capricorn, Aquarius, Gemini, Sagittarius, Leo, and Aries.
 
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Veronica

Well-known member
I have a 12th house venus in Gemini opposite Uranus in Sagittarius. My relationships have been very unusual, very unstable, it has played that sometimes Iam the conventional one but my partner isn't or the other way as well me the weird one and him the more conventional one. I think venus in hard aspect to uranus makes relationships very unstable, I think there is always some form of fear of emotional intimacy, and fear of intimacy also applies to falling in love with people that your know are emotionally unavailable to you. I also think Uranus in Libra or Uranus conjunct the Descendant Axis brings a similar tendencies as one who has a natal venus-uranus aspect.
 

gen6k

Well-known member
I have moon square uranus 3rd to 6th.

Dont have any problems with emotional closeness, but instead comes out erratic. Probably something that aquarians or pisceans have more ease in understanding. I guess to others it could seem malevolent or things of that sort, but its more like finding space inbetween, above, underneath. I would be down to hang out everyday, but there is also a sense of fun turnover. I'm only negligent if i'm pissed or overcrowded. Like I will take a couple days to myself, but im mostly there.

Think it really depends on the structure/sign for the exaberation of this, but it could also be of a different nature with venus.

a more stable/dignified venus square uranus could be really exciting if its padded. for example pluto in 5th or something of that nature so it spins in place.
 

The_Saturnian

Well-known member
Venus in my Gemini Ascendant, opposes Uranus in Sagittarius. Although I'm still a novice at Astrology, I can confirm that the list of things above are somewhat true in my case.

I know exactly what you mean Veronica, either I'm the eccentric one in the relationship or she is. Furthermore, I've never had anything concrete with anyone. I wonder if this hard aspect plays a past in causing a delay in establishing at the very least, a long term relationship if not marriage?
 

Neptune Rising

Well-known member
Lol, Venus in Aquarius. Its in a very mild square with Uranus (I don't count the orb myself, but some people do). Anyway, yes I can be 'difficult' in relationships, they cannot ever be conventional, there has to be something unusual about them - which gives me a headache as I do want to settle down (Saturn in Cancer in the 7th house, inconjunct Venus). I've gone for unsuitable people at times in my life, but mainly because I was in a different place emotionally and spiritually. My Venus is also trine Pluto, so I do love intensly, but need my space.

The idea of settling down, into a quiet suburb, living in a street where all the houses looks the same literally makes me freeze. My street would have to be the type where all the houses were different styles, different decors, and my partner would have to be somewhat unconventional, preferably indepentant and working for himself in some way, or with an unusual job (though not mafia or something like that - Venus trine Pluto...) - I don't feel comfortable with a 9-5 type of guy.

And yes, the thrill of the chase always made me happy, but as I get more mature, I realise it's not the be-all-and-end-all. But I'd like to take that essence of spontaneity, in some way, into the next relationship that I have.
 

miquar

Well-known member
I have a close square. Uranus in the 4th, Venus in Capricorn in the 6th. When I was younger I was very needy of security in relationships, but these days I can't live with a partner and prefer to be single rather than be responsible for my part in maintaining a partnership. I have gradually over the years found myself doing something which I attribute to the Venus Uranus square - if I see an attractive person, I don't experience a yearning to know or possess or be intimate with that person, but rather I'm able to see that person as a visual embodiment of a state of inner beauty that I would like to experience. In other words, I think, 'Ah, I wish I felt as good as you look!' And increasingly over the years I've been able to connect with my anima in response to such a vision of beauty, and feel that inner beauty. This has just happened on its own without me trying to cultivate as some self-help technique. I see this is tied up with my Venus Uranus square, though I'm not sure I could articulate exactly why I see it this way.

I just adopted a cat - perfect house mate(6th house - pets!) No emotional demands (Uranus!)
 

Vista

Well-known member
Venus rules my 7th house and I have Venus square Uranus. It's been my nemesis my entire adult life. I either like someone more than they like me or vice versa. Interestingly I also seem to attract a lot of men who have Uranus in hard aspect to their 7th house ruler, Uranus in hard aspect to MY 7th ruler Venus, or Uranus placed inside the 7th of their own natal charts. Also, if they don't have either of these configurations, they have a rising sign that places Uranus inside our composite 7th house. Clearly I do a lot of projecting onto my partnerships, either way my needs don't seem to get met for long.
 

virgo18

Well-known member
In my case I am the one who gets drawn to those kind of people. I do have Venus-Uranus but its a sextile. The thing I have is the ruler of my 7th house squaring Uranus, and between the people I attract, I always prefer the ones who have Venus (hard aspect) Uranus, and they prefer me. Sometimes I think I have karma with those people. Sometimes I think I am the weird one who doesn't want to commit and that people are the reflection of that part of my personality that I can't accept.
I feel I am conventional and want closeness, rise a family and all that stuff with my venus in scorpio conjunct pluto. But I am stubborn in my preference to people that are more aloof, cold, and emotionally unavailable (Venus-Uranus).
I also run away from guys who are too demanding, while I am demanding too!

SometimesIn the past, when I didn't knew much astrology, I felt threatened, used, not very appreciated and played by this people until I realized their Venus-Uranus. Now I dont feel like that because I know that's the natural way they love. Not because someone doesn't loves you as you want to, means that they don't love you.
The thing that is real, is that I cannot wait for any commitment and I cannot make me illusions with this people.
 
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Veronica

Well-known member
All the men that I have fallen madly head over heels in love, had venus-uranus conjunctions, the first one had a Venus-Uranus conjunction in Sagittarius which basically opposed my natal configuration, the other one was a Virgo... he had a Venus-Uranus conjunction in Libra. The most recent one doesn't have Venus-Uranus aspect but he has Uranus in Libra tightly conjunct his Descendant.. So yeah I seem to attract people with these aspects as well. Its a bummer when relationships don't last long... in my case the longest serious relationship I've ever had is one 2 years... They don't seem to make it past 2 year, Either I've gotten bored, or the relationship was so unstable it reaches its end or so stable it reaches its because it got boring. It is a shame because I do on a personal level admire... people who get married and make it.
 

Vista

Well-known member
None of these combinations of planets seem to point to long-lasting romance for any of us. I don't believe I will ever get married not just because of this aspect although this is a huge contributor.
 

virgo18

Well-known member
Yes I understand what you mean. I experienced that in the few serious relationships I had. The first one lasted 8 months, the second one lasted 2 months, and the third one lasted 2 weeks. That were my only 3 serious relationships.
I had two perpetual dates, or more likely open relationships. That were the ones who lasted more.
One of them with a Virgo with Venus square Uranus. In this relationship I was the one who didn't want commitment, we liked each other and dated for 3 years, he called me every third day or something like that. Sometimes he disappeared from the map, he was in a relationship with another gal, then he dump her and start dating with me again.
At the same time, and actually I am with a Capricorn with Venus square Uranus, and in this case I feel I am the one who is reaching commitment, and he doesn't. I have been dating with him for 4 years, and in the inter I did enter to other relationships and dated other people. The relationship with this guy is quite unstable, and he call me every third day. He do tells me that he loves me but I dont see any try of commitment from himself to me.
Sometimes I think that if someday we commit, something bad will happen and it wont work, or I will get bored. That's ironic. LOL


In resume: I last more in relationships which are Venus-Uranus like. Open, not too demanding. While I am always complaining about their lack of attention toward me.
I last very little with guys who are more emotional, demanding, and committal.
 

Veronica

Well-known member
In my case I am the one who gets drawn to those kind of people. I do have Venus-Uranus but its a sextile. The thing I have is the ruler of my 7th house squaring Uranus, and between the people I attract, I always prefer the ones who have Venus (hard aspect) Uranus, and they prefer me. Sometimes I think I have karma with those people. Sometimes I think I am the weird one who doesn't want to commit and that people are the reflection of that part of my personality that I can't accept.
I feel I am conventional and want closeness, rise a family and all that stuff with my venus in scorpio conjunct pluto. But I am stubborn in my preference to people that are more aloof, cold, and emotionally unavailable (Venus-Uranus).
I also run away from guys who are too demanding, while I am demanding too!

SometimesIn the past, when I didn't knew much astrology, I felt threatened, used, not very appreciated and played by this people until I realized their Venus-Uranus. Now I dont feel like that because I know that's the natural way they love. Not because someone doesn't loves you as you want to, means that they don't love you.
The thing that is real, is that I cannot wait for any commitment and I cannot make me illusions with this people.


Iam not sure if every person who has the Venus-Uranus aspect hard aspect, tends to be aloof and unavailable. I don't feel like Iam cold and aloof... sometimes I feel like Iam very emotional... ( but that is perhaps because of my moon and rising sign in Cancer) Yanno its very hard to synthesize that when you see someone with certain aspects for example venus-uranus and you see perhaps a water sun, and moon.. or earthy placements that would also suggest the venus-uranus aspect doesn't play as strong as it seems.

Anyways perhaps on my personal level, after everyone I have basically dated or wanted to be with has lived far away... I can't even say I've dated anyone who lived on the same city as me... because that would be a lie. And after many recent unnecessary tears, I have reached to a conclusion, that although I have always seemed eager to make things work in a relationship, always eager to be in one... ( specially stable one) The choices in men I kept on making ( which have been really bad with total unrealistic expectations) have made me realized that Iam totally projecting in through them my fears of being in a loving relationship, in addition the extreme level my emotional unavailability has reached these past 4 years... Perhaps its fear of exposure and trying to make something work, I dunno.. I didn't realize any of this until January this year... As to what exactly Iam going to do regarding my patterns.. I honestly dunno. I have no clue. Perhaps the only practical thought seems to totally disconnect myself from dating sites and places I often go to, and really stop searching and perhaps channel all that Venus-Uranus stuff in my chart in more creative pursuits than trying to find or satisfy the Venus-Uranus in me through some short lived unreliable relationship that will probably make me cry and make me feel more alienated and lonely in the end.
 
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virgo18

Well-known member
Hey Veronica

Yes, what you saying is very true!
The moon, and descendant sign play an important role in how you act in relationships. More if they are in water signs.
But is what I said in the top of the thread. Venus-Uranus will act similar in all the people who own it. But the behavior can vary depending on the sign Venus is. Specially Sag, Aqua, Gemini, and could be Virgo and Aries.
 

virgo18

Well-known member
None of these combinations of planets seem to point to long-lasting romance for any of us. I don't believe I will ever get married not just because of this aspect although this is a huge contributor.

I don't think this aspect will lead you to not getting married. Nothing is fatalistic in here. Yes, this contributes a lot in changing constantly your ideas of what you want and what you wait from a relationship with a loved one.

That will be more about if the 7th and 1st rulers are united by an aspect, or if your 7th significator is placed in the southern or northern part of your natal chart pinting if you will get married lately or being too young. But this is another subject.
 

Vista

Well-known member
Iam not sure if every person who has the Venus-Uranus aspect hard aspect, tends to be aloof and unavailable. I don't feel like Iam cold and aloof... sometimes I feel like Iam very emotional... ( but that is perhaps because of my moon and rising sign in Cancer) Yanno its very hard to synthesize that when you see someone with certain aspects for example venus-uranus and you see perhaps a water sun, and moon.. or earthy placements that would also suggest the venus-uranus aspect doesn't play as strong as it seems.

Anyways perhaps on my personal level, after everyone I have basically dated or wanted to be with has lived far away... I can't even say I've dated anyone who lived on the same city as me... because that would be a lie. And after many recent unnecessary tears, I have reached to a conclusion, that although I have always seemed eager to make things work in a relationship, always eager to be in one... ( specially stable one) The choices in men I kept on making ( which have been really bad with total unrealistic expectations) have made me realized that Iam totally projecting in through them my fears of being in a loving relationship, in addition the extreme level my emotional unavailability has reached these past 4 years... Perhaps its fear of exposure and trying to make something work, I dunno.. I didn't realize any of this until January this year... As to what exactly Iam going to do regarding my patterns.. I honestly dunno. I have no clue. Perhaps the only practical thought seems to totally disconnect myself from dating sites and places I often go to, and really stop searching and perhaps channel all that Venus-Uranus stuff in my chart in more creative pursuits than trying to find or satisfy the Venus-Uranus in me through some short lived unreliable relationship that will probably make me cry and make me feel more alienated and lonely in the end.

I've done the long distance thing too although not in quite a few years. Interesting way of dating someone who is physically "unavailable."Now, I just seem to date men who are emotionally unavailable or stop liking me once I like them. But I agree, how does one change internal programing that is subconscious?
And I also agree, I am certainly not aloof(Moon in Cancer and part of a Kite) and unavailble. I wonder if Venus square Uranus has something to do with people feeling they don't really deserve love? That's what happens in the end, we don't get the love from the people we want.
 
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Vista

Well-known member
I don't think this aspect will lead you to not getting married. Nothing is fatalistic in here. Yes, this contributes a lot in changing constantly your ideas of what you want and what you wait from a relationship with a loved one.

That will be more about if the 7th and 1st rulers are united by an aspect, or if your 7th significator is placed in the southern or northern part of your natal chart pinting if you will get married lately or being too young. But this is another subject.


My Venus is placed in the 8th house square Uranus in the 6th. Venus is also sextile Mercury/Saturn conjunction although the aspect to Saturn is wide(8 degrees). Mars my ASC ruler is retrograde and unaspected. You see, it's not just the Venus Uranus square that makes mye think I won't be married. Sun makes no aspects before leaving it's sign, in other words, all the aspects are separating. The almuten of my 7th is Saturn and Saturn is square Neptune in the 8th. Most of my relationships are typically cookbook outcomes of these aspects, fast starts and sudden endings, loving people who don't love me or are ambivalent about me, and in some case dating men who have alcohol problems and are deceptive. I really don't believe marriage is in the picture. I am also much older than you probably realize - long past childbearing age. There are other techniques I have used to look at marriage in my chart and most seem pretty grim in terms of that ever happening for me.
 

miquar

Well-known member
Iam not sure if every person who has the Venus-Uranus aspect hard aspect, tends to be aloof and unavailable. I don't feel like Iam cold and aloof... sometimes I feel like Iam very emotional... ( but that is perhaps because of my moon and rising sign in Cancer) Yanno its very hard to synthesize that when you see someone with certain aspects for example venus-uranus and you see perhaps a water sun, and moon.. or earthy placements that would also suggest the venus-uranus aspect doesn't play as strong as it seems.

Anyways perhaps on my personal level, after everyone I have basically dated or wanted to be with has lived far away... I can't even say I've dated anyone who lived on the same city as me... because that would be a lie. And after many recent unnecessary tears, I have reached to a conclusion, that although I have always seemed eager to make things work in a relationship, always eager to be in one... ( specially stable one) The choices in men I kept on making ( which have been really bad with total unrealistic expectations) have made me realized that Iam totally projecting in through them my fears of being in a loving relationship, in addition the extreme level my emotional unavailability has reached these past 4 years... Perhaps its fear of exposure and trying to make something work, I dunno.. I didn't realize any of this until January this year... As to what exactly Iam going to do regarding my patterns.. I honestly dunno. I have no clue. Perhaps the only practical thought seems to totally disconnect myself from dating sites and places I often go to, and really stop searching and perhaps channel all that Venus-Uranus stuff in my chart in more creative pursuits than trying to find or satisfy the Venus-Uranus in me through some short lived unreliable relationship that will probably make me cry and make me feel more alienated and lonely in the end.

Hi. Yes I think this is a really interesting point you make. I have Moon in Scorpio in the 5th house, with Cancer rising, and my Venus squares Uranus from Capricorn. I have Pluto right on the IC.

With the hard aspects between Venus and Uranus (which could include the conjunction in some cases) the native may be predisposed to choose one over the other. Obviously this is less likely if Venus is in an air or fire sign, and more likely with earth and water. Venus in a yang sign is more easily integrated with the Uranian need for detachment and flexibility.

If the chart shows a tendency to seek security, then Uranus may well be projected and then the disruption of Uranus seems to come from the outside - possibly as a tendency to fall for erratic and uncommitted partners - as you know from your own experience.

Even though I have a strong Uranus and personal planets in Aquarius and Sagittarius, I always used to greatly fear the ending of relationships. My Cancer/Scorpio/Capricorn needs were decidedly at odds with Uranus.

Sometimes people talk about air and water as describing different ways that people connect. Water allows no space between the people involved, while air demands that there is space. The disconnection you speak of could be a part of finding a balance between these two kinds of connection. Often we have to taste the extremes to find the centre.

The air and water in people like you and I will probably always feel in conflict to some extent. Perhaps the answer is to see what each side is afraid of and then address these concerns, like in conflict resolution between two people.

My own path to a place of relative peace in this regard has been to connect with the feelings that are aroused by the potential or actual withdrawal of a loved one (or with feelings of loneliness triggered in other ways). When such a feeling arises, I remind myself that all of the energy involved in the feeling is inside me - that there isn't some half-complete energy within me that can only be at peace by finding its complementary half in another person. I withdraw my attention from the trigger, and focus on the feelings arising inside me, and this is enough in itself for a sense of wholeness to be restored. Even if it is not the most comfortable and enjoyable feeling, it is IMO a more accurate perception of the situation, a way of being open to feelings without being dependent on other people, and a good foundation for any future intimacy with another being.

I would say that this kind of disconnection from others is more productive in the long run than trying to cut off from feelings altogether (not that I'm assuming you intended to do the latter).
 

Veronica

Well-known member
I've done the long distance thing too although not in quite a few years. Interesting way of dating someone who is physically "unavailable."Now, I just seem to date men who are emotionally unavailable or stop liking me once I like them. But I agree, how does one change internal programing that is subconscious?
And I also agree, I am certainly not aloof(Moon in Cancer and part of a Kite) and unavailble. I wonder if Venus square Uranus has something to do with people feeling they don't really deserve love? That's what happens in the end, we don't get the love from the people we want.


I can relate to not totally getting 100% the guy I want so badly, I've wondered if people do really ever get what they want and pursue romantically. Speaking of myself I have several markers of wanting pursuing unavailable people, Venus on the 12th... Saturn on the 5th, Saturn Ruling the 7th... seems like a lot of restrictions are placed upon me to get what I want. I dunno what a venus-saturn hard aspect feels... natally.. but having those mentioned placements feels just as bad as having a venus-saturn hard aspect. I dunno if it has to do with feeling worthy of love or not... I think it has to do more with fears around opening up emotionally, I think there is a fear of emotional intimacy. And now that I think about it, it does make sense why Virgo 18 in a earlier post did mention that before she got deeply involved into learning astrology she felt threatened by people with these aspects, she did also mention she has a Venus in Scorpio I dont remember if its conjunct Pluto or not... But I would assume someone with a venus in Scorpio would crave emotional intensity, and would be less likely to be afraid of emotional intimacy.

I don't know what everyone else internal romantic reality feels like. But all I know is that @ least the times I have felt head over heels in love.... The world felt more alive, colorful, real.... it was almost electrifying. Imagine going back to that bitter old place, hollow, place after feeling such a emotional high, and making a decision to take a emotional risk. I have always believed its not the reality of getting your heart broken that hurts its having to dwell with the reality of having to pick up the pieces and knowing that dreams are shattered and the world feels like it have ended. Because that is exactly how the world feels when you lose or didn't obtain the love of someone you love soo much. The World Ended.

Iam not aloof ( although I can be aloof when I sense a person is trying to play a game with me) and that is exactly the curse, of all this configurations, My venus in Gemini can be very fickle perhaps dual I will admit I might have been dual @ some point in my life specially when I was in my early 20's I was naive, stupid, ignorant, but I will also admit that I also have the moon in Cancer and once a person gets to my moon sympathies, I find it very hard to let go, even with a Venus in a air sign in hard aspect to Uranus.
 
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Vista

Well-known member
I can relate to not totally getting 100% the guy I want so badly, I've wondered if people do really ever get what they want and pursue romantically. Speaking of myself I have several markers of wanting pursuing unavailable people, Venus on the 12th... Saturn on the 5th, Saturn Ruling the 7th... seems like a lot of restrictions are placed upon me to get what I want. I dunno what a venus-saturn hard aspect feels... natally.. but having those mentioned placements feels just as bad as having a venus-saturn hard aspect. I dunno if it has to do with feeling worthy of love or not... I think it has to do more with fears around opening up emotionally, I think there is a fear of emotional intimacy. And now that I think about it, it does make sense why Virgo 18 in a earlier post did mention that before she got deeply involved into learning astrology she felt threatened by people with these aspects, she did also mention she has a Venus in Scorpio I dont remember if its conjunct Pluto or not... But I would assume someone with a venus in Scorpio would crave emotional intensity, and would be less likely to be afraid of emotional intimacy.

I don't know what everyone else internal romantic reality feels like. But all I know is that @ least the times I have felt head over heels in love.... The world felt more alive, colorful, real.... it was almost electrifying. Imagine going back to that bitter old place, hollow, place after feeling such a emotional high, and making a decision to take a emotional risk. I have always believed its not the reality of getting your heart broken that hurts its having to dwell with the reality of having to pick up the pieces and knowing that dreams are shattered and the world feels like it have ended. Because that is exactly how the world feels when you lose or didn't obtain the love of someone you love soo much. The World Ended.

Iam not aloof ( although I can be aloof when I sense a person is trying to play a game with me) and that is exactly the curse, of all this configurations, My venus in Gemini can be very fickle perhaps dual I will admit I might have been dual @ some point in my life specially when I was in my early 20's I was naive, stupid, ignorant, but I will also admit that I also have the moon in Cancer and once a person gets to my moon sympathies, I find it very hard to let go, even with a Venus in a air sign in hard aspect to Uranus.


You made some great points. The Water Trine part of my Kite configuration with the Moon in Cancer in the 4th house no less, along with Jupiter in Picses and Neptune in Scopio, while outer planets are generational, really enhance the sensitivity of my Cancer Moon. It's frustrating because the rest of my chart is very unemotional with Venus Sag, Mer Aquarious, Sun Cap and it's ruler Saturn in Aquarious, Mars in Leo, and of course throw in the Venus square Uranus and my relationships are really kind of a hot mess!! I can completely tap into the unemotional side of my personalily but like you once they get into my Moon sympathies like they do with you, it's impossible for me to let go. I am going through that now with someone I was dating. It's a rarity that I have ever fallen in love and he was one. Naturally he has his 7th house ruler in hard aspect to Uranus. Of course, could I expect any less??? He has Saturn on the 5th house cusp and it's ruler square Jupiter and Mars, trine Uranus. He was actually married for 20 years(7th ruler sextile Jupiter and Pluto so he has some stability). Even so, like you I am picking up the pieces again and starting over, and yes, starting over is the worst feeling. I am not a young person any longer so it's particularly frustrating. I love astrology though, it's helped me understand personality traits and patterns I would have never known otherwise had I not been studying astrology for 20+ years.

Venus in the 12th and Venus in hard aspect to Saturn, AND to a lessor extent Venus retrograde, unrequited love comes to mind or loving the one you are NOT with. :pinched: This seems mostly true with Venus/Saturn and Venus rx. Venus in the 12th in many instances can also mean secret love affairs either you are the one cheating or you are the "other woman." I am not saying this is you, just my experience when studying charts with these configurations. Whatever the aspect patterns, they all seem to lead to nowhere eventually. It's kind of sad.
 

Veronica

Well-known member
You made some great points. The Water Trine part of my Kite configuration with the Moon in Cancer in the 4th house no less, along with Jupiter in Picses and Neptune in Scopio, while outer planets are generational, really enhance the sensitivity of my Cancer Moon. It's frustrating because the rest of my chart is very unemotional with Venus Sag, Mer Aquarious, Sun Cap and it's ruler Saturn in Aquarious, Mars in Leo, and of course throw in the Venus square Uranus and my relationships are really kind of a hot mess!! I can completely tap into the unemotional side of my personalily but like you once they get into my Moon sympathies like they do with you, it's impossible for me to let go. I am going through that now with someone I was dating. It's a rarity that I have ever fallen in love and he was one. Naturally he has his 7th house ruler in hard aspect to Uranus. Of course, could I expect any less??? He has Saturn on the 5th house cusp and it's ruler square Jupiter and Mars, trine Uranus. He was actually married for 20 years(7th ruler sextile Jupiter and Pluto so he has some stability). Even so, like you I am picking up the pieces again and starting over, and yes, starting over is the worst feeling. I am not a young person any longer so it's particularly frustrating. I love astrology though, it's helped me understand personality traits and patterns I would have never known otherwise had I not been studying astrology for 20+ years.

Venus in the 12th and Venus in hard aspect to Saturn, AND to a lessor extent Venus retrograde, unrequited love comes to mind or loving the one you are NOT with. :pinched: This seems mostly true with Venus/Saturn and Venus rx. Venus in the 12th in many instances can also mean secret love affairs either you are the one cheating or you are the "other woman." I am not saying this is you, just my experience when studying charts with these configurations. Whatever the aspect patterns, they all seem to lead to nowhere eventually. It's kind of sad.

I thought this whole venus in RX was going to be a good thing for me specially, when it went direct @ 7 Degrees Gemini, and also with the Jupiter Conjunction... I have to admit it hasn't been that great. I expected more excitement.... and I haven't been receiving none. So I was sick of mars in Virgo rx and the long transit because it squared my natal venus ughhh... and now I just want venus in Gemini to leave... and move to cancer :).

I've had secret affairs, but no extramarital affairs... I can't stand being someone else's second plate or second option. So what happened with the last guy? If I were you I wouldn't give up hope on Finding love, faith and hope are the last things to loose in this life Vista, and even though u say you are getting older and such you seem like a appealing classy person, Iam sure you will eventually meet a decent guy :). So dont give up
 
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