Venus square Saturn

Vagabondgirl

Well-known member
Thanx Mod!

Yes, I think Im used to some saturn influences when it comes to feelings. I usually keep my head cold more than most people in stressful situations.

But now I see saturn is conjuncting my virgo stellium, but also transiting uranus is opposing both my moon/venus and the transiting saturn. Sounds heavy, and different forces I guess. Stable saturn and unstable uranus and my poor moon/venus:/

School, friends and family is usually managable in my life. Its just the love part thats not going so well and I can never completely figure it out, haha.
 

astropsychologist

Well-known member
I have the Venus/Saturn square (well, its in a T-Square with Neptune to top it all off!). I don't have any issues with confidence and self worth when i'm single (Sun in the 1st and Leo Moon helps with that), but when i'm in a relationship my self-esteem goes down the drain and I tend to think less of the other person because I can't believe he's chosen me when he could have anyone he wants.

I've been single for a long time and reading this thread has given me some insight into why that is...I like feeling good about myself and I just never do in relationships. I'm a bit worried that I'm avoiding relationships for this very reason :(
 

Claire19

Well-known member
Some old philosopher said 'the stars incline, they do not compel' or some such thing....

You make your own life - irrespective of astrology - don't look at your star chart (or indeed your upbringing) to set the course of your future.

Astrology should give you positive guidance, not set limits on you.

:)
The stars impel, they do not compel. The more aware we are the less we are influenced by our charts in a negative way.

The natal chart does give a general outline of why we are here and who we are, there is no doubt. It is meant to give understanding and guidance and how we are to grow. I dont believe in feeling enslaved by it or feeling fated and powerless. I do believe some things are fated but it is how we handle it all that counts.
 

Claire19

Well-known member
I have the Venus/Saturn square (well, its in a T-Square with Neptune to top it all off!). I don't have any issues with confidence and self worth when i'm single (Sun in the 1st and Leo Moon helps with that), but when i'm in a relationship my self-esteem goes down the drain and I tend to think less of the other person because I can't believe he's chosen me when he could have anyone he wants.

I've been single for a long time and reading this thread has given me some insight into why that is...I like feeling good about myself and I just never do in relationships. I'm a bit worried that I'm avoiding relationships for this very reason :(
For some reason you feel inferior in relationships or that the other person is somehow better than you. It depends where in the chart these aspects hit too. YOu may choose someone who you feel is superior on an unconscious level in order to reinforce your belief that you dont deserve that person etc. We do tend to feed our neuroses.

That it is a painful aspect I have no doubt. But it can lead to a more realistic view of relationships and often finances too. It is not conducive to starry eyed romance but rather more mature sort of love.

With someone that I loved and who loved me I had that aspect with my Saturn squaring his Venus and no matter what I did or said he interpreted as rejection or not really loving him and he felt bereft and lonely as a result. This can be enormously frustrating and saddening for both parties.
He felt old and unlovable even though I was only a few years younger.
He had other challenging aspects to his Venus which exacerbated his feelings about love and being lovable. He chooses to stay in a stale and unstimulating relationship that is safe and stable and of long duration.
 

DevilshAngel

Well-known member
I have a friend with this aspect. Although he has never actually said it I can tell from somethings he said, done and just a feeling that he is quite insecure.

I have it conjunct. I can feel the insecurity, but I don't think its as bad.

Also the finances ha yes! It makes me sick to spend money! Venus in Cap conjunct Saturn in the 2nd house that has Cap on the cusp! Even if its not a problem I worry and feel icky, I hate it :annoyed:
 

multiple

Account Closed
one thing i've noted which I don't think I mentioned is that heath ledger had the opposition aspect and I think it was very significant in his tragic death.he also has sun opposite pluto and sun aspecting neptune, being someone who has similar aspects I can understand it in his behaviour .it plays out in his personality when in films where you see him cast in a relationship role. if you study his body language and behaviour you can see the coldness and austerity ,add pluto in the 7th and more of the suspicious side of a personality pops up when people are expressing affection towards him. venus saturn sometimes doubts the sincerity when people show affection,his pluto opposite sun in the 7th may have amplified a sense of distrust,the neptune aspects to his sun mercury and mars would set these ideas in his mind that he is being persecuted, even if the person isn't causing them harm.saturn venus people can sometimes test others to see whether they really care but this often causes their own undoing as its scares others away and makes one look cold which is exactly the opposite of what they want.
 
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astrology02

Well-known member
I have venus in libra square saturn, neptune, uranus (all in capricorn) and jupiter (in cancer).

I never understood why i had no luck in relationships until i came across astrology. I would say I subconsciously believe I am not worthy of being in a loving relationship. I am sensitive to rejection and always assume I will be alone. Out of all the aspects in my natal chart- venus square saturn is the most challenging without a doubt.

As a child, i had low self-esteem, very few friends and even as an adult I have not overcome it yet.

I have had very loving people in my life and have had some positive relationships, however like others have said there is always a defense mechanism that goes up when someone gets to close to me. I think people with venus square saturn are so unhappy with themselves that they project that on to others and get negative results.

It's really great to hear other people's stories because it lets you know you are not the only one feeling like this.

Thanks for sharing everyone :)
 

astrology02

Well-known member
Inferiority complexes are common among Cancer types. That is your rising sign according to this chart, but to be certain of any Ascendant figure, I'd have to cast your chart myself. It is likely that you actually have Pluto squaring your Ascendant.

So let's address Venus square Saturn. What Venus and Saturn have in common are what we Value. Venus values from the heart (or gonads) and Saturn values from a place of practicality, material or earthly realities. In square aspect these two show a conflict of feeling and standards.

Part of the problem is that you will have to work to understand how to give and take without compromising yourself. Your sense of Love has a tendency to be too fixed, not flowing. You are relationship-oriented with those Libra planets and Sun and Venus in aspect, but you will have to work through things some would call karma related to these things.

Venus in Scorpio can mean you withhold affection unless you have possession of them. Saturn in Leo is often status-oriented, not respecting someone unless they meet certain criteria.

Understand this aspect is a strong, driving one. Many people who have this aspect are involved in relationships and marriage. Venus and Saturn create commitment, but don't expect it to be all roses and come easily in some happily-ever-after scenario.

The chart you show here, if reasonably correct, is the chart of an entertainer, someone who pursues her passion and who has an audience. If this does not in any way describe you, then we're looking at a chart that needs to be seriously adjusted.

great interpretation!:smile:
 
Hello,

I found out about my square Venus(Aquarius) Saturn (Scorpio) not so long ago, and, being generally very paranoid, I realised it has affected me badly as is already.

So, I accidentally came across this thread, which was indeed very enlightening, and everyone is going on about being realistic.

Everything has been very true about me, I never even felt attracted to anyone, and when I did, the person would typically be popular, and myself generally uncool and unwanted, nothing much at all, the usual teen clashes. I first kissed a boy at 23 and first made love at 25. And I really feel like I messed things up between myself and my lover because I felt insecure around him all along, this permanent fear of rejection and unwanted-ness seems to be chasing me everywhere.

And the most beautiful thing that has ever been done for me was when a crazy latent lesbian took a train from Berlin to Paris to meet me for one evening - this is really lame, because this is the last thing one would want to happen.

I am very good looking, by every single standard, I gradually learned to make myself popular, I made friends with cool popular people it's a privilege to be friends with (in my teens I was friends with unpopular ones like myself, for lack of a batter alternative). So everyone wants to be around me now, but still once it comes to love as such, I find myself desired by the wrong men and overlooked by the ones I would consider being with.

Now there is a man in my life, twice my age or thereabouts, we seem to be dating, and my organic being is sort of happy around him (very attractive and intellectual and pretty much whatnot, younger girls just swoon over him by the dozen), I feel appreciated and generally not too useless, but another part of me feels that it's because guys around my age do not want to get involved with me that I ended up where I am.

The problem with me is that I just love young bodies, soft skin, immaturity in a good way. I would love to share and walk the road with someone, to evolve together pretty much, not to be with someone who is a fait accompli. I feel like beautiful things exist beyond my reach and I'm just getting older, and I have no clue what I might be doing wrong.

So, I can't make much out about this being realistic bit - my Mars in Pisces, obv. I don't want to work on anything - it hurts to see things turning up in everybody's life but mine, no one I know seems to be working on their lovelife, and it just seems unfair that I should "work". And even when I work it doesn't come to much. I don't want to be realistic. Everyone keeps saying I am unreasonably romantic (prob true), so I can't see why extraordinary stuff just can't come my way, realism seems to be like the poison that will make my life useless and not in the least fascinating, and I love being fascinated, it's part of my identity. I believe this sort of position is justified.

The usual questions, basically. Am I doing anything wrong? What is it that I should do to make things not this hopeless?

Many thanks in advance and cheers for reading

x

Elaine
 

astropawn

Member
I have a t-square between a venus-mercury conjunction in 6th capricorn, a pluto-saturn conjunction in 4th (late libra and early scorpio) and my cancer moon in 12th. I can say that I have experienced the situation in full.

Starting with 4th house, my childhood years were not very happy. My parents quarrel a lot, mainly because my acquarious mum has a very essentric and strong personality, that she wants everything her way and she is the same time irrational and dominating. My dad couldn't cope with her and he left home to do business in another city since I was 12 years old, only comes back 2-3 times a year for a duratioin of less than 2 months. We are talking about China here, where their generation were not too keen to file for divorce. They stayed married till today, but I know both of them suffer alot from their marriage. The absence of my father's support may be the result of saturn being in my 4th, i guess.

That left me alone to cope with my mum. I suspect she does not have water sign at all in her chart, and she must have a strong mars or pluto. for today when I think back, I remember myself crying so very often, believing myself the most-miserable child in the whole world, because of my ever so sensitive cancer moon was afflicted terribly by her irrational behavior, quick temper, various accusations and abusive language. Growing up, I couldnt realize at all how wonderful I am and the many good qualities i process, even though I have always been a charming person outside of home, I was more alive elsewhere than in my own home. Even till today, i never talk about my feelings with my mum or my dad. Issues relate to the heart is completely shut off from both of them. Nor I am comfortable to speak my secret to any close friends till a few years ago. I definitely had the problems to entrust anyone with my feelings, because i fear rejection, disapproval etc.

The problem of venus square saturn becomes more accute when I fell in love with someone I love greatly. I am all spontaneous as long as i am not in love, but when I am, I feel so akward to express my feelings, and most important of all, i feel I am so undeserving of the other person. I mistrust my relationship, and constantly suspecting they are fooling around with women around him, and was very jealous about their past relationships. Having a capricorn sun and mecury, I tried everthing to force myself to act and think rationally, but my moon wouldnt let me. I have to constantly cope with the disconcord between my mind (mercury) and my feelings (moon), which were like two horses going opposite direction to split me in half. But still, I couldnt voice a word about this struggle to anyone. I kept everything for myself.

If not for jupiter gives support to both venus(sextile) and moon(trine). I could have been lost in limbo forever. But thanks jupiter, who gives me conviction and positivity as well as the courage to laugh at myself. Even in the darkest days, I still kept myself positive, and telling myself it will all be over one day.

The good thing about Saturn is that it makes people learn. having pluto conjunct saturn give the learning a tranformative power. I feel I have died and made alive again after my experience, as a result I see the world differently, although it could be either for better or for worse.

The advices I can give to people who have similar aspects:
1. there is no way to avoid it when planetary movement begin to energize the aspect, so be brave and face it with strength, knowing that all the miseries will be over one day
2. try to learn about urself as much as possible, speak to a consellor, study astrology and have a rational framework to solve your problem
3. be positive
 

sassaqua

Member
Hi all,

i would like to reinforce what several members have said here, as well as enquire further.

First, my venus(cap12) is trine my saturn(tau5). I have howver gone through a very horrible break up with someone I love dearly.

His venus is conjunct mine, and, in the same house - we are both cap rising so yes, his venus is also in his (and my) 12th house. But, his venus is inconjunct his saturn(gem5).

We have finally broken up, after awful, awful times, however, I attribute a lot of what happened additionally to other aspects in his chart - such as: his venus square pluto, his saturn opposite mars (my mars conjuncts his), and also square his moon(T-square).

I will try to keep the focus just on the saturn inconjunct his venus.

When we initially began dating I saw how much he would test me, on purpose. It became absolutely exhausing for me. Another thing I noticed initially with him is that, he gives people enough rope to hang themselves. This was awful to watch with others, thne, eventually it was with me. He will give and give, then, when that person doesn't meet his expectation or needs in some way, he totally lashes out, and then justifies it completely in his mind like they deserved it. Was sad to watch becuase from my side he was delusional, and setting others up for failure to justify the unleashing of his scorn, or rejection of them, and ultimately making himself more unhappy and dillusional. It was about power. And here I think it is absolutely correct to associate this aspect with an inferiority complex - much is done to (over)compensate.

What others have said here as well, there is a lack of trust and an absolute suspicion of the giving of love and affection from others. To this day he will still insist that I didn't love him :( I feel sad for him: he is like a deep black hole, a vortex that is never filled, he lives in constant fear, and taking the life out of others in a desperate attempt to fill his own vortex.

I say this with great sadness and regret as, I couldn't reach him. I tried to lend out my saturn trine venus but, it seemed he was only suspicious of my free and easier expression of love. He used to kind of emotionally trap me too, in a "i told you so" scenario. Yes, mostly - or even always - it was a completely bias and subjective rational that no logic could penetrate.

So, the moral of the story is, try to trust love. I think that, people need to trust themselves too in that, if they do get hurt from love, they trust themselves to be able to recover. It's better to have loved though. If one is uncertain, then certainly, travel with caution. But remember with this aspect, it can be exacerbating for those trying to love you - don't take it to extremes.


I would like to hear more about the inner feelings and dynamic one feels with this aspect - can any try to describe what happens inside your head/heart?
 
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sassaqua

Member
"with my parents they do love me but it feels like tough love,like they will treat me in a way that is disrespectful or. cruel and that is how i'm suppose to experience love so I go into situations being a lot more wary of people. "

Wow, that's quite a statement and interpretation - but it feels like tough love,like they will treat me in a way that is disrespectful or. cruel and that is how i'm suppose to experience lov. I don't know you but, personally, I don't think it is how you are supposed to experience love at all. The equation is quite illogical: these things are the antithesis to love!

I noticed similar with my ex's folks, I know he had deep feelings that he was unloved, and abused even. His parents are - as far as i am concerned - cold, distant and undemonstrative of love and affection, between themselves, and toward their children. My ex had the opportunity to live a life contra to this, however, it seems he cannot get beyond his conditioning (or his venus inconjunct his saturn), and has decided to go with what is familiar, and therefore easier to acquiesce. It's pretty difficult when you do not have an alternative model to develop toward, and most people just want to "go with the flow" of what is easy and unconscious, rather than do the work of living a conscious life.

Unfortunately what you get then is projection and blaming others outside of oneself for the pain you feel inwardly. Which is what I copped - he blamed me for everything: if he was not sitting comfortably with himself for whatever reson, it was because I looked a certain way, a tone in my voice or, anything. It was the most abusive situation I've ever encountered, and on a truly sadisitc level.

Sorry, I'm still recovering....
 

sassaqua

Member
I can almost feel the fear and isolation of your childhood coming through your post Multiple.

Thanks for sharing your experience and perceptions.
 

sassaqua

Member
I just though of something else: what about fleeting/unstable romance attractions with a venus square saturn, does this ring any bells for anyone?
 

melina

Well-known member
This thread is really insightful and I'm grateful I came across it yesterday.

I also have Venus in Gemini (8th house) squaring Saturn in Virgo (11th house). For me, it all ties down to my low self-esteem and wrongfully believing that I am not worthy of love, or there is simply something wrong with me. It's a constant battle to quieten the voice down, but it is something I am more aware of and working on.

I've only had unstable romances. My Venus also squares my Moon in Pisces (5th house). Saturn is also opposite my Moon. *argh*
 

Jupiiiter

Member
Hi everbody, joing you with my Venus square Saturn ascpect.
I believe in a positive life heading. Perhaps some of you might like Michael Brown, who writes about authenticity, integrity, intimacy, presence, grace, gratitude in connection to working on yourself. He has a webpage, The Presence Process, his approach is very warm (10 basic "lessons":1. connectning with present moment and body via breathing lesson, 2. recognizing mirroring and projecting, 3.choosing consciouos reacting, 4. feeling unconditionally, 5. i am innocent, 6.connecting the burdening feelings, 7. I feel sage now, 8. I forgive myself, 9. I love myself unconditionally, 10. I respet myself for who/what I am). It about re-connecting.

All the best

Jupiii
 

byjove

Account Closed
Hi everyone,

does anyone know what kind of effects this aspect might have on one's attitudes to friendships? I've read that Venus-trine-Saturn individuals are often loners and don't place much value in them, and I know one individual with this natal aspect and is exactly as described. So what about us venus/square/saturns? Scared, confused, fear problems, and pull back?

And are there any members who feel that they've overcome the most negative features of this aspect as they got older? Any troublesome artifacts remain? Just curious. :whistling:
 
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