What is your mars like and how assertive are you?

LilyLavender said:

Thank you for this thread! It is actually exactly why I just joined this community.

Scorpio sun / Aries moon, with Mars in Capricorn (exalted) exactly conjunct sun-moon midpoint, in the 8th. Sextile to Saturn in Scorpio, forming a yod with my ascendant. I know many astrologers do not consider the ascendant as part of a yod... I'm interested to know anyone's thoughts on this.

I have Venus exactly opposite my Ascendant. I do feel like this configuration plays out as a major theme/lesson in my life. Asc-Venus opposition makes me want to "play nice" with everyone, don't make any waves, always put on a smile, etc. But I feel like my Mars is pretty fierce but somewhat repressed. I'm super intense (Scorpio stellium) and people feel it when I enter the room. I can just feel everyone sort of tense up and it has caused me to compensate and go all meek and mild, show how harmless I am (or am I? ) which is rather easy with my Venus. But it does nothing to actually negate the simmering beneath the surface. I feel like I'm constantly trying to negotiate that balance but it never comes out quite right. If I'm assertive at all, it usually comes across as aggressive, even though I'm consciously trying to be calmly/kindly assertive.

That was a bit of a ramble! I'd greatly appreciate anyone's thoughts. Anyone have similar stuff happening?

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chiamaria said:

Mars in Capricorn very loosely conjunct Neptune in 4th. This placement is one of my biggest prides in my chart.

I can't say that I'm overly ambitious (nor do I wish to be to be honest) nor am I intimidating, it's just that I can work long hours non-stop and push out quality work while others may have an hourly coffee/smoke break. My sister who's also a Cappie Mars is the same. I'm able to stand up for myself when I'm hard done by and I won't allow anyone to walk all over me ever. Also, I never get sucked in by sales-speak. That being said, I am easy to work with and never boss people around. I wouldn't say I'm particularly assertive, I'm actually even a bit passive. I'm only assertive when I feel I'm being sc r ewe d over.

Due to my small size and meek appearance, I've had a person or two assess me and evidently conclude that I was a pushover. They were even a bit condescending towards me and thought they could coerce me into making a hasty decision (for their benefit of course) via fear mongering and manipulation.

BOY. WERE. THEY. WRONG.

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Starsareround said:

Conspiracy Theorist,
I’m not totally surprised about what you wrote of Libra. Just from my personal experience with Libras they never seem to be doormats, but often use fairly sophisticated manipulations to achieve their power. Pretty aggressive in their own way, just not in the Aries way.

The main difference appears to be that they are more socially integrated and aware. A lot of what they do is for the good of the larger community or with the benefit of more than themselves in mind. So I guess I like to think of learning Libra lessons in that way, possibly more than my own sense of being vulnerable and yielding or not, but just in keeping more than myself and my own needs at the forefront

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Spideynyc said:

Mars in Cancer and I’m extremely aggressive if I get angry I Usually Go into full rage mode an Aries Mars once tried to punk me I guess he thought I would be scared or something and I embarrassed him and left him speechless. I think it’s because I have sun square mars or I have mutual reception with my moon. I honestly don’t get it I see everybody say how MIC is passive agressive and I just don’t relate to that I don’t think I’ve ever been that way, if I feel like somebody’s taking advantage of me or threatening me, then I handle it, and if it gets physical then I fear for my enemies. Maybe it’s just me..

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Abby83 said:

I totally relate. I think it's cos of the squares that makes us aggressive, cos for me, mars in virgo 11th house should not be aggressive. I have health problems cos im irritated easily and get angry, releasing too much cortisol.

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Spideynyc said:

Nice to know I’m not the only one lol what squares do you have? And are you a lunar Scorpio too? I have sun square mars mars opposite Uranus sun square Uranus. Moon trine mars mars trine pluto moon conjunct pluto. My guess is one of those aspects makes me completely different than the sterotype MIC

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Abby83 said:

im asc scorpio. have mars square uranus and jupiter. my mums mars squares sun jupiter and uranus, and my son has mars square uranus. all 3 of us are internally volatile with little irritants. we dont hurt ppl but we scream and our brains explode. im doing tests for adrenal issues riht now cos dr thinks i have hypercortisolism due to this. our bodies just dont do well with stress. my twin daughters were expposed to the same situations as my son yet its like aggressive situations are invisible to them and their mars has harmonious aspects. my son, mum and i usually use physical outlet for frustration but i dont think thats healthy. im turning to humour instead these days.

also, my mum and sons mars is in capricorn. i noticed they are both fatherly, masculine and protective over me, which is great cos my real father was absent and weak. so i wonder, with your mars in cancer, do u find yourself protective in a motherly way?

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Spideynyc said:

Oh yeah I can definitely relate to the screaming it’s either I scream throw something or fight lol mars square Uranus definitely gives anger problems from what I’ve heard I have the opposition and it’s difficult to control my temper, for me I find that it’s better if I release it then to hold it in and let it build and then I explode. They say that people with squares need to find outlet to release their temper, as for you question I do find myself very protective but not necessarily in a motherly way but just protective for ones I care about if anybody does something to somebody I deeply care about it won’t be pretty. I also stand up for those that are bullied I can’t stand bullies so also wind up fighting for people who aren’t asserting themselves, that might be my aries tho lol

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Abby83 said:

Lol id love to have you in my corner . Yeah re built up anger ill give u example about this morning. 3 of my kids are screaming about their own concerns whilst im trying to give instruction to one of them and he's not listening. I repeat two more times and he doesn't listen whilst the other two are trying to scream over to get heard, asking me to do something. the fourth voice i hear trying to come in from the bedroom is my husband. i cant hear anything he's saying. i take a few deep breaths cos of the repetition of four ppl screaming im not listening to them. i go to see what my husband so urgently wants to tell me after trying to overpower the kids screaming, and all he wanted to do was boss me around and tell me to do a couple things. I snapped and said 'FAR OUT, I KNOW, DUH!!!! Stop bossing me around.' Like when questions or tasks repeat itself in a bossy manner it's highly irritable to me and i just scream shut the f up, one at a time. However, my twins who have well aspected mars, they dont fight back at all, they just curl up into a ball.

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Abby83 said:

You also said something about releasing squares and oppositions? I have definitely found using a midpoint can help. Like, when t uranus kept opposing my libra planets, i learnt that being a funny, joyful, positive, optimistic sag detonated the abuse coming from my in laws (uranus).

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Spideynyc said:

Are you referring to T-Square I have one of those all the planets are squaring my aries sun I read somewhere that whatever the squared planet is then that energy is multiplied which can explain why I can really lose my cool at times they say the missing sign is how you what you need resolve to problems in my case the missing sign is libra so I need to stop being so impulsive and make more reasonable decisions.

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Cary2 said:

I'm not going to discuss my chart with strangers, especially astrologers at a forum online, but I am here to discuss astrology, and here we are discussing Mars and assertiveness.

Mars is most assertive with significant Mars/Uranus contacts followed by Mars/Pluto. Mars/Pluto is more intense, but more reserved. Mars/Uranus is not reserved.

Mars conjunct Asc., MC, Desc., IC or aspecting the midpoint of any of these is assertive. They will respond in kind to aggression, or they may be aggressors. Of course, they can be other things like sportsmen or activists or engineers or leaders. Mars trine these points doesn't generally pick a fight, but look out, they don't back down, and they aren't inclined to lose a fight. If you are a jerk or a bully, you'd better find another victim.

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PlutoLibScoAsc said:

I have Mars conjunct Saturn in Scorpio.
When I am passionate about something, whether is art or sports I give in my all. Few examples, I have represented my school to compete in rhythmic gymnastics (I didn't win though). I can spend at least 3 hours or more like 5 in the gym, daily if I want to, it is usually when I am doing something fun like rhythmic gymnastic, just treadmill and dumbbells bores me. My husband say I am crazy for spending such long hours in the gym. But I think I have got the stamina (friends say so).... If I want it, I enjoy working hard for it without complains and just keep pushing and pushing myself and see how far I can go.
I studied a foreign language to its highest level (not full score). I do art and win awards. I worked like a horse. Sorry if this sounded like bragging but is just really what happened. This aspect can be very consuming of my whole being. It's time, energy, sleeps deprived, like an addiction, absorption and obsession to perfection, to achieving, to accomplishing... I think this is due to Scorpio's passion. Well, when you are passionate about something you enjoy the process of it. But in the case of workhorse, my past occupation is really killing me due to its demands it has affected my health. So yeah, now I changed field and is great, I can finally rest and be stress free most of the time.

When it comes to anger. In the past, I bottle up a loooot but I think I somewhat fixed this issue now and let it come out as in like verbally fight for my rights and not let people push me around. People around me are so shocked now that I dare to reason with them and/or fight back, lol.

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Hkk said:

Ppl get shocked as they get used to the old you and don’t want the new you. The evolved you. Then that’s toxic. But yes I think with age as you grow as a person if you tolerated **** well you don’t anymore and your pushed into assertiveness.

Ppl who have assertiveness in their mind and are worried or don’t know how to overcome this will eventually overcome this as it’s on your mind and it’s an issue for you so when you focus you achieve. It happens naturally

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