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Unread 08-04-2017, 10:45 AM
Kibblerz Kibblerz is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 102
Quote:
Originally Posted by sadge View Post
I’m sticking with my original opinion. I personally would not go for this relationship. But that is only my opinion. I have my own set of standards which tends to be pretty dang high because I’ve seen it all. Now if this was already an established relationship, such as a marriage, and your question was what needs to be done in order to preserve it, then my advice would be different. We would be taking a look at the challenging points and uncovering ways to mitigate them through conscious awareness. But that was not your original question.

Listen, anything is possible. Just look around. People with the worst synastry hook up all the time and stay together for the rest of their lives, literally until one of them dies. That’s when the other one finally gets some sort of relief and freedom…..and the ripe age of say, 85 or 90.

There is no such thing as perfect synastry. I have yet to see a synastry request posted on this site that has blown me away. Not a single one. Those kinds of relationship are very, very rare. And the ones who are happy probably don't need to be posting on this site anyway. So my point is that you will always have a mix of positive and challenging cross-aspects. Some people start to freak out over just one or a handful of encouraging signs, such as a planet to an angle, mutual trines, sun/moon going both ways, whaaaatever….. but most people don’t realize that it’s all basic energy that you run into all the time in life. If you take the time to look up the synastry of all the people you meet, you’ll see that all of the ones you “like” or gravitate toward have some kind of a positive synastric connection, even the mail carrier or your favorite cashier at the store. That’s how life works. I’ve experienced just about everything you can in synastry so it takes a LOT to impress me now. You can have amazing synastry with someone, like sun/moon going both ways, tons of Jupiter, the classic mars/venus, angle stuff, throw in a node…..and BAM……all it takes is one or two fatal aspects to make it painful. What is "fatal" will depend on the natals. In your case, I’ve spent enough time now struggling to find fundamental threads of basic love and natural compatibility that I have a **** headache from trying to find a way to see that this is "the one" for you…..this is the kind of disharmony that emerges down the road once the honeymoon period is over.

But like I said, anything is possible. Can you make this work? Sure. Can you guys decide to break it off? Sure. It’s totally up to the two of you and what you guys are willing to do.

Bottom line: I don’t see enough positive aspects to be able to tell you in good faith that this will be a satisfying relationship in the LONG-TERM. For both of you. And that wide orb you’re talking about??? It’s pretty **** close if you ask me. Look at the chiron/mars. Your dsc ruler is mercury….both mercs are squared. Her Neptune squares your sun, your venuses widely square one another…..it’s just not even close to an emotionally or spiritually satisfying relationship. Not by my standards.

But here’s the last thing I will state: I believe strongly from experience that everyone we meet along our life path is there for a reason. We attract relationships based on certain things we need at any given moment for our own soul development. So even for those relationship that don’t work out, or are filled with tension or hurdles to overcome, there is always something of value that is gained for you in the end, and it is always something that serves to take you to the next level in life.

So it’s your call. There is a “benefit” that can be gained from any relationship. People have to experience a range of relationships to figure out what they need anyway….so do what you want. It sounds like you guys have already made the decision to go for it anyway. Perhaps take it one step at a time....like just date for a long time....there isn't a law that you have to make it official or put a freaking ring on her finger right away, right?

Done.
Thank you for the advice, I do appreciate it. I certainly see the influences you're talking about and most of my paranoia in the relationship is me being afraid of hurting her. I know it's unlikely to last forever too, though some things came up that make it seem worth it.. I've already pretty much told her everything there is to know about me, my deepest secrets and so forth and she seems to accept me for all those flaws and claims she never felt the same for another..

Tbh I figured out she had a suicide attempt recently before we saw started dating :/ so if anything I just want to atleast be able to help her love herself and be happy.

It's all over emotionally explosive already for sure. And yeah there's certainly gonna be some pain ik..im hoping the healing effect of Chiron will hopefully result in something beneficial. I just want to minimize the pain, and the obvious route is to just not go for it at all.. But I don't want anything to happen to her :/
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