Venus square Saturn

has anyone with venus square saturn found meaningful love in their lives?

does anyone have a happy ending?

I have lots of love in my life. Always have!

Love2Know said:

I have lots of love in my life. Always have!

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so there is hope

astrology02 said:

so there is hope

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Of course! It's only one aspect in a chart plus I have other "nice" aspects involving Venus and Saturn separately.

"The square from Venus to Saturn indicates that you have difficulty relating to others. As a result, you may feel left out of the mainstream of social relationships. You are basically unwilling to accept the responsibility that is established when two individuals meet in a more than casual way. You tend to be on the defensive, as if you feared that the other person would make impossible demands of you. Perhaps in your early life you felt rejected by someone you really cared for, even a parent."


I'm scared of people placing too much reliance on me, doesn't mean I have a lot of love just sometimes I just get fed up or a bit uncomfortable and wanna be alone. This is not from my parents though, they are the opposite of that. They have an open house to friends and family, I can kinda want to lerk alone and not have people expect me to do stuff. As I get older I realize it's worth it to open up, not just to run away emotionally. I still struggle with it, I guess it makes me kinda like a guy in relationships sometimes. lollllllll I have love and the people around me always push me to open up and help me work through my fears or desires to explore other areas of life in a unstable manner. Like I could be in school for 5 years then before I finish wanna bolt to another city even though I have lots of support as in people who enjoy me. I always struggle with those irrational feelings. "If you are attracted to someone whom you can admire and respect, isn't it worth adjusting to that person's peculiarities? You will find your own identity by being willing to identify with others in mutual responsiveness." Pretty much also the last part makes sense;" Try to become more optimistic and give yourself a greater chance for happiness. Feeling melancholy and sorry for yourself stimulates some physical problems, such as high blood pressure caused by tension and anxiety. Learn to relax and let go. Life is too short to let it become unnecessarily burdened by unimportant matters. Try giving instead of complaining about what others demand of you."


Basically every sexist thing said about men and relationships in a negative way would make them appear as having a venus sqaure saturn.

Quotes from http://www.strangehouse.com/natal-aspects/saturn-square-venus-2.html

good one too
http://theastrologyplace.blogspot.com/2010/07/venus-saturn.html

Arian Maverick said:

You may have heard of the Law of Attraction, Arian Maverick

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i too have Venus square Saturn [it is not a rare aspect] between Leo and Scorpio...after years of trying to cope with the subconscious inner conflicts as well as the financial hardships, I have finally learned that indeed true change must come from within rather than from without...what is required is a change of perspective and attitude, as well as developing a new faith and trust in the self [via the divine connection] and the willingness to see ourselves objectively and to forgive that inner self that keeps us feeling weak, unworthy or lonely.

Venus indeed is a large part of the Law of attraction and I consider that it also relates to 'expectations'...too often we hold unrealistic expectations and find ourselves remaining disappointed and frustrated when we feel we are not being given what we deserve...

Great posts, all!

Yeah but I have been blessed with a lot of stuff including my university being payed for me.. my downfall is being vain, like if I gain some weight nothing else in the world matters besides that. I am getting over that horrible mentality.

A good song for all my venus square saturn peeps
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-J7J_IWUhls&ob=av3e

I think it is about overcoming our own fears of love and finding the strength within to take a leap of faith, when someone worth it finally comes.

HEY i have almost a t square in those houses too. 1st house pluto in scorpio square fourth house saturn in aquarius's last degree square seventh house venus in gemini square tenth house mars in virgo...
i would describe my childhood as a disillusioned inferiority complex, mind you i think it was great... it made me who i am today.

Astrodawn said:

I have read liz greens saturn/venus with my eyes wide.
She described my childhood and relationship problems with so much accuracy it was like she knew me!

Ive got a t square of

7H saturn square 4H venus square 1H moon

I used to wish i was adopted when i was about 10 because i could have understood why they didnt like me?
I get into relationships with all sorts of waifs and strays and most turn out to be abnormal in some way .... you only have to read my previous posts.
I dont actually feel as though ive ever loved anyone properly and I dont think anyones loved me. ( although I always fall madly in love with new beaus's for about 6 weeks then it just stops) <---if you know what i mean?

A fascinating read on this subject, thanks for explaining my lifes trials in such a readable way

think I will have to give up on men, and be an old spinster

Dawn

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Hello, I was wondering, are there some helpful general advices, when flirting with someone with venus square saturn?

Do I have the correct impression, when I say, they are a bit cold and withdrawn (maybe even if they don't mean to)?

Is being persistent and cheeky a good strategy here to get through to these people? Or better be calm and patient? Or are there absolutely no general advices possible?

fantasmo said:

Hello, I was wondering, are there some helpful general advices, when flirting with someone with venus square saturn?

Do I have the correct impression, when I say, they are a bit cold and withdrawn (maybe even if they don't mean to)?

Is being persistent and cheeky a good strategy here to get through to these people? Or better be calm and patient? Or are there absolutely no general advices possible?

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Depends on the person, I have venus leo square sag being persistent and cheeky works for me lol, what are their square signs?

Love2Know said:

I have venus leo square sag being persistent and cheeky works for me lol

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Ok, but you would probably act a little bit cool, even if you like the persistent and cheeky way? The cool behaviour is of course a bit discouraging, but if though a happy ending is prospective, I think it's possible to stay on the ball

Love2Know said:

what are their square signs?

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Mh, venus gemini square virgo...

fantasmo said:

Ok, but you would probably act a little bit cool, even if you like the persistent and cheeky way? The cool behaviour is of course a bit discouraging, but if though a happy ending is prospective, I think it's possible to stay on the ball


Mh, venus gemini square virgo...

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Well I get morally intense and critical fast... Sometimes I just need space but if someone makes me laugh and flatters me a lot 10000 points
i am hot and cold but as i get older i ignore the cold more as to not make others feel bad

Hey,

now I remembered a looong time ago I already knew somebody with this aspect venus gem. square saturn virg. (Also had moon gemini) (and I had a feelling like, being forced to get together, though it took a veryvery long time we first talked to each other, but attraction (when I speak for myself) was always there).
And yes, it all ended up in a lot of critisicm which hurt me very much.

So now I thought, is it my "destiny" being attracted to these guys? I also form a moon square venus with these people...maybe that's also a reason.

I have a link that show my planets and aspects (is that enough?)...I was wondering if it's possible to say: do I have a tendency to be attracted to such people? And the most important: Do I have talent to "handle" them well? (I believe I don't...especially the thing with permanent criticsm is really not easy...on the other hand I think I am always willing to help people and stay by their side).

So here's my link, would be very interesting, what you think:
http://img856.imageshack.us/img856/7271/tablevq.png
Houses are (if that's needed):
moon 5 (equal houses 6) // Sat 11 (equal houses 12)
mars 9 // Jup 11 (equal houses 12)
sun 10 // Pluto 12
merc 10 // Uranus 1
neptune 2

I have Saturn in 2nd h. opposition Venus+NN in 8th.

I thought about this aspect very much. Because as I opened many threads about it, I believe I am cursed forever in relationships.

I don't believe the biggest problem is about self esteem. There are lots of times, especially in university, that I was very self-confident, talkative. I was never a cold person and I am a smiling person even if I don't want to(I mean I often laugh even if I am not in that mood, I can't hold myself)...because this is about Asc. not Venus. And I am like that although Venus is the ruler of my Asc. Probably it gets this cheerful power from Jupiter which squares this opp.

See? Even in the times I'm so self-confident, I couldn't find a boyfriend. The ones I found was hardly done although I knew they are not good for me.

Saturn is the self-torturer, not the teacher and it never ever gives a prize for this torture. I will give you an example:

I had social phobia during my adolescent years. I worked so hard to overcome it, you can't believe. I do many things to overcome my fearful personality. If Saturn is a teacher, then I do anything to change myself and let myself go. But at the end...nothing happened. 10 years of work and nothing changed. I made lots of new friends, they all left me. I didn't meet any person who is suitable for me. I even don't have a job. I am alone again. Look at this teacher

If Saturn is the teacher; In my second and longest relationship, I deny many things for a long time. But at the end of the first year, I realized it is not good for me and I finished it. I realized so many thing and get the lesson. But unfortunetaly after I learned my so-called lesson, I met nobody. For the last 5 years. I fell in love with a man whom I learned later that he has a girlfriend.

That is my fate. And I can surely say that Saturn created all the problems later, especially the fear. You start to get more paranoid and controlled in your life. Saturn causes the person to be over controlled and a cold person. I was not like that, I happened to be a person like that in the last 3 years. And this is not growing up, this is getting older and older and losing your life joy everyday. Because nothing changes even if you try.

So I understand that this is my fate and now I want to be alone forever. I accept it. I can't accept to marry someone at the age of 40 or 50 while all my friends and most of the people had fun in their most beautiful times. So I will live alone because I didn't get any gain from my work of self-improvement.

And because my Venus is in the 8th, I had very bad experiences about occult things. I am writing this because Saturn taught me to fear. I exactly live that. I'm 27 and in the last 2 years of my life, (also Saturn was transiting through my 12th-1st house) I learned to fear men, sex, occult things, friendship, trusting someone, showing myself. I lost everything I won and solved before. That's a huge disappointment and I won't let myself to be decieved again.

Maybe u didnt learn the lesson yet.. If people keep leaving u then maybe you should be examining why they do so. I was thinking about my saturn sag 4th square leo venus 1st..... and also how my cap mars 5th issues seem to come into play. I really can be so pleasure and lesiure focused that it makes these workaholic yet slighty goofy types go nuts. I tend to overdo pleasure to a T! I can come off so nice friendly and silly but not focused or serious. People are suprised I get anything done, I do not like to express any compeitiveness or accomplishments to others.... I believe that is boring and others are for fun. If I am at work I work, I cant over think or talk about it without feeling like my life is wasting away. I always strive to be free and have fun but I realise with some relationships this attitude can put on strain on them because no one wants to be with a loser. Or someone who comes off so laid back and care free they can be viewed as unmoitivated. But I am very intense and anxious, I guess my leo rising can hide it too well sometimes. I got in a fight with someone I love the other day, apparently arguing with me is like arguing with a wall..... I have a hard head and get confused by insults. I have have to try very hard to see the other persons perspective from a logical view point without twisting it into myself being totally right and justified and I do and sometimes I need to compromise instead of being fatalistic and saying F off bye, which I can do when I feel my freedom or self expression is being hindered. I try not to confuse a with b or c and stay on the issue. This is a hard lesson and one I have to keep learning sometimes sticking around through some harder times is the more difficult but better option than walking away so easily from people and living with a weird sort of half regret, that is clouded by ego. Now I kinda sit and try to become more compassionate with people instead of defensive and running away! In the end it makes you closer. So anyways sometimes the lesson you should really be learning is the one you haven't learnt yet because you have been too busy nursing your own ego while running away.

I never ran away. I changed my behaviours so many times but the result was the same. I tried so hard. I tried various therapies, pills, healing types. Nothing changed. And why there must be a lesson? This belief is for comforting ourselves in this unequal life. This is the double-face of this belief;
Saturn is said to give a prize after hard work, or punishes for non-work
But when we look at the pratical life, there is only punishment and pain. Outer world is not working like that. And these principles always blame the individual. Why am I the guilty one? Everyone knows how to love so good except me? Remember the people we're complaining are members of consuming culture, especially the ones born in 80s.
So personally I don't believe any planet in astrology is a teacher. Maybe the word "transformation" is better for using.(difference is being more constructive) If they are teachers, after thousands years of research we all have to know the solutions of these stressful energies. But we still don't know. A good teacher has to teach the solution of the problem in so many years. We're just talking but not solving anything. We know ourselves better with astrology and I like that but there is no solution. I read 7 pages of this thread and see no solution really.

Midnight sun. I hear you and feel your pain. I've felt the same frustration and despair. Its 4 years since I started this post and not a lots changed really. I still haven't met the love of my life. Relationships have not suddenly become easy. I'm 35 now and I do feel progressively more bitter, as I watch my friends build homes and families and plans for the future.

I'm so glad people are still adding to this discussion. It reminds me that most of my problems are simply this aspect! I just picked up the Liz Greene book as I was looking at the difference between the opposition and the square (she doesn't say much on that). Her text sets out the whole problem. I'm not sure what work you have been doing Midnight Sun, but I think that if we are to make any progress here we have to be doing deep deep deep level work on the lack of nurturing/love/affection, abandonment, neglect we felt in childhood and also looking to embrace our own femininity more. I think that really, all the work on myself I have been doping is just putting a plaster on the top and not really dealing with the wounds. I did do some psychotherapy but that just bored me without the astrological perspective.

So, you say its not about self esteem/self love but I disagree. Saturn and venus....what else could it be? I think its possible to do and say all the right things (i.e. being self confident) but its the core beliefs and expectations underneath which are important.

I remember once, someone said to me....its simple, you just have to learn to lighten up around relationships.

OMG! : S

spacecadet said:

Midnight sun. I hear you and feel your pain. I've felt the same frustration and despair. Its 4 years since I started this post and not a lots changed really. I still haven't met the love of my life. Relationships have not suddenly become easy. I'm 35 now and I do feel progressively more bitter, as I watch my friends build homes and families and plans for the future.

I'm so glad people are still adding to this discussion. It reminds me that most of my problems are simply this aspect! I just picked up the Liz Greene book as I was looking at the difference between the opposition and the square (she doesn't say much on that). Her text sets out the whole problem. I'm not sure what work you have been doing Midnight Sun, but I think that if we are to make any progress here we have to be doing deep deep deep level work on the lack of nurturing/love/affection, abandonment, neglect we felt in childhood and also looking to embrace our own femininity more. I think that really, all the work on myself I have been doping is just putting a plaster on the top and not really dealing with the wounds. I did do some psychotherapy but that just bored me without the astrological perspective.

So, you say its not about self esteem/self love but I disagree. Saturn and venus....what else could it be? I think its possible to do and say all the right things (i.e. being self confident) but its the core beliefs and expectations underneath which are important.

I remember once, someone said to me....its simple, you just have to learn to lighten up around relationships.

OMG! : S

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Wow I have non of these issues, not more than anyone else. I mean I can be kinda intense but I have seen worse without this aspect./ I was never abandoned.

spacecadet said:

Midnight sun. I hear you and feel your pain. I've felt the same frustration and despair. Its 4 years since I started this post and not a lots changed really. I still haven't met the love of my life. Relationships have not suddenly become easy. I'm 35 now and I do feel progressively more bitter, as I watch my friends build homes and families and plans for the future.

I'm so glad people are still adding to this discussion. It reminds me that most of my problems are simply this aspect! I just picked up the Liz Greene book as I was looking at the difference between the opposition and the square (she doesn't say much on that). Her text sets out the whole problem. I'm not sure what work you have been doing Midnight Sun, but I think that if we are to make any progress here we have to be doing deep deep deep level work on the lack of nurturing/love/affection, abandonment, neglect we felt in childhood and also looking to embrace our own femininity more. I think that really, all the work on myself I have been doping is just putting a plaster on the top and not really dealing with the wounds. I did do some psychotherapy but that just bored me without the astrological perspective.

So, you say its not about self esteem/self love but I disagree. Saturn and venus....what else could it be? I think its possible to do and say all the right things (i.e. being self confident) but its the core beliefs and expectations underneath which are important.

I remember once, someone said to me....its simple, you just have to learn to lighten up around relationships.

OMG! : S

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It doesn't change if you're more feminine. Of course I attract some men but they are always wrong people, always. Drug addict, have a girlfriend, only thinks to have sex, etc. They always have a wrong side which will hurt you. This is the aspect of being hurt constantly. The men I fell in love were kind of not showing me interest and I was the one who was running after them all the time. This situation hurts my pride so much that now I can wait forever if a man doesn't move his *** for me. This is the only thing I've learnt but still nothing changed. Because if I don't make any move, they never make a move.

Now I really understand that I'm not as valuable as other women because a man will never fall in love with me and do something to win and make me happy. And I won't do it for any man, too. Because I have a huge rage now. As I said before if Saturn teaches something, this is fear and rage. Because I earn these two after trying many years.

midnight sun said:

It doesn't change if you're more feminine. Of course I attract some men but they are always wrong people, always. Drug addict, have a girlfriend, only thinks to have sex, etc. They always have a wrong side which will hurt you. This is the aspect of being hurt constantly. The men I fell in love were kind of not showing me interest and I was the one who was running after them all the time. This situation hurts my pride so much that now I can wait forever if a man doesn't move his *** for me. This is the only thing I've learnt but still nothing changed. Because if I don't make any move, they never make a move.

Now I really understand that I'm not as valuable as other women because a man will never fall in love with me and do something to win and make me happy. And I won't do it for any man, too. Because I have a huge rage now. As I said before if Saturn teaches something, this is fear and rage. Because I earn these two after trying many years.

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Hmm I dunno I was like that a bit as a teen, but my leo venus is too hopelessly romantic and I have a short attention span, so when I am knocked down I sulk if I will get some delicious pity lol if no one is looking I just shrug and move on. Or else I would get bored...... ????? Being down can only really be amusing or intense for a short time till I get bored with myself and restless and need to find something else to do. I have this aspect but the signs get along I feel like it has to do with my slightly immature attitude sometimes more than other people. Other people can suck or be great and are usually very bias and sometimes full of it, but its more important to focus and make peace with yourself because you cant really escape yourself. You should be able to be your own bestfriend lol.

Love2Know said:

Hmm I dunno I was like that a bit as a teen, but my leo venus is too hopelessly romantic and I have a short attention span, so when I am knocked down I sulk if I will get some delicious pity lol if no one is looking I just shrug and move on. Or else I would get bored...... ????? Being down can only really be amusing or intense for a short time till I get bored with myself and restless and need to find something else to do. I have this aspect but the signs get along I feel like it has to do with my slightly immature attitude sometimes more than other people. Other people can suck or be great and are usually very bias and sometimes full of it, but its more important to focus and make peace with yourself because you cant really escape yourself. You should be able to be your own bestfriend lol.

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I am bored, too and I turned my attention to other things I enjoy in life.

I think Saturn-Venus aspects are also about creativity, right? We can also talk about how it effects our creative life? For example, I am afraid to create even when I am by myself. I never like things I create. So I can't show myself like other people. This is the aspect of losing forever...It's like living in a jail without any help. Because I need to express myself through creativity but I'm afraid to do it. I force myself but it feels like I'm forcing a locked box for opening.