I would gladly tell you to be honest but the biggest obstacle for me is that it is very personal, intimate in fact, and I would kind of be required to reveal aspects of myself that would be embarassing. I have talked a little about it with very close friends. And I have not yet succeeded - I am working on it; but I must first overcome some obstacles, hard ones!
Your journey makes me very curious. Maybe we are having a similar journey. God works everywhere. It would not surprise me one bit if some other guy on the other side of the earth made a similar discovery.
It has to do with ego that some refuse to change. It annoys me that some astrologers are so stuck in patterns that are quite frankly outdated. A discipline must always improve.
My quintiles are supported by other factors, but it seems that the quintiles are the ones that defines my spiritual mission, more clearly than the other factors.
Would you mind to go deeper into your spiritual journey?
Edit: BY THE WAY MY JOURNEY STARTED 2014 TOO!!!!!!! Or it was rather like it really started 2014, it was then I found the answers!
Haha man got more in common than we think. And I know how it is man wanting to keep personal things to yourself and no i dont mind sharing my experience.
At the beginning of 2014 my grandmothers alzheimers had progressed severely. Man it was depressing. She basically raised me so you can imagine how I felt seeing her like this. She was bed ridden, and wasnt able to talk really anymore. The summer is when things got so much worse. Her health declined swiftly. I can still remember her moaning in pain from the sores that kept coming and I can remember the smell. It was very depressing. In June she coded on the way to the hospital but they brought her back thankfully. When I saw her breathing so heavy I was hurt. I broke down immediately. Typing this is kinda hard because the pain still exist. After being in the hospital for several months she finally came home. I remember working 12 hour shifts at a factory from 3am to 3pm and still going to sit with her. She came home on my birthday. I spent my entire birthday getting what i didnt know was her hospice equipment. It was just so sad. She passed away 2 weeks later right after I went to work. I was living in the house she was on hospice at so i could help more. I remember having to leave work and seeing her eyes grey and body stiff. She died watching her great grandkids play right across the hall. She was so big on family. It cut me deep man. This was november 2014 that she died. I used to have a real bad drinking problem, but o fixed it and when she died I wanted to self destruct so bad but i just couldn't. Instead, I started working out again(after many years of not doing so). That's the quintile, automatically i threw myself into something. It wasnt right away tho. It toom a few months. 6 months later, my gf of 4 years(off and on)began not coming home. Ironically, this started at the same time I was trying to do better for myself. Well I didn't wait for an explaination on why, I figured she was cheating and it was obvious. The messed up part about it is she waited until she got a new job to do it. I just packed up and left. What was even worse for me was, she was pregnant by him. For 4 years we could never conceive. I knew it wasnt mine because we werent having sex at all that month, she wasnt even there for me to. But all of a sudden, when she cheats, she gets pregnant. Man that was so horrible. I was still severly reeling from my grandmothers death, just coming home seeing her like dead killed me. Now my pain intensified because I had to deal with the fact that the person who I loved was pregnant and it wasnt by me. I was beyond sad. The entire month of June I self destructed. Drink everyday and smoked everyday but somehow I was working out here and there. One day during the summer something just snapped in me. I just got extremely dedicated and determined to change. Despite working 12 hours all the time I still got off and worked out for 2 hours. I wanted it that bad.
I also had to pay 5000 dollars in 1 year or go to jail for 6 months and still pay 5000 dollars(hit a pole and drove off). Crazy part is, they waited almost 2 years to bring it back up. So I was facing some pressure. I paid it off tho. I was making steady progress and I started distancing myself from destructive ppl and found more constructive friends without trying. One person who was very dedicated to lifting wanted to workout with me which was a huge compliment to me. I told him I want to wait until I hit my goals and he said he would be waiting. We started working out together in August and I just kept progressing thru all my pain.
Everything was good until my job, of 4 years(4 shows up alot now that I'm looking at it lol)laid me off. I was distraught. They did it out of anger and long story short on that, i got em back and turned down their job offer. Revenge lol on accident at that because I was already employed somewhere else that quick. I hit my long term goals, man I mean life changed so drastically and so fast. I had never been that positive before in my life. I lost 50 lbs and made so much progress. But this is when my consciousness changed. My grandma was very religious and ill be honest, watching her suffer and then die made me question everything. I started doing heavy research. I am someone who believes that the universe will answer your souls questions and will bring you in contact with your souls needs. I just believe we are all connected to the universe. My research went very deep and I connected alot of dots. Instead of losing faith I renewed it. I became less religious and more spiritual.
Somewhere along the line I learned about astral travel and the astral world. Didnt even mean to. My dreams were so intense, so surreal. I have had a dream where I was taken to a place in the universe and brought to a portal and asked which time in my life I would like to go to. Wasnt communicating with words but it was like talking with emotions. So hard to explain. The more I elevated my consciousness the more my dreams became clearer and more universal. I could feel the universe trying to show me things. I just evolved so much and all i had to do was survive the pain.
It brought me to where I am now as a person. Even tho life is hitting me real hard right now, the universe has opened me up more and more to my soul. My journey was surviving my past and my pain. Being challenged to not self desteuct to instead embrace my emotions as they were the language of my soul. The more I embraced them the more i grew. I believe in the consciousness being more than what scientists make it. I believe in alot of eccentric things concerning the soul. As of now, i try and keep my consciousness clear and try to be aware while I dream because I feel like alot of
What occurs in dreams is us clearing our conscious. The more elevates it becomes the more aware we become.
I have changes alot thru the years and left ppl behind that were negative. Now I am being faced with the challenge of walking away from those that i truly love but dont love me the same way.