Transits to composite.

rahu

Banned
your interest in this tsquare comes as a septile transit by the node on the juiter/venus/Pluto cross passes.

you have two planes of partnerships/marriage.
Mercury is exactly conjunct to the moon and square to juno and uranus.
This implies that the reason your marriage ended is because you and he lost the…trust to speak with from soul, as this aspect shows that emotional/mental connections for twin travelers. It shows union with those who share the psychic/astral channels.

Your second plane of partnership/marriage is shown by Jupiter opposed to venus and square to Pluto. this is one of ambitious actions. Personal advancement/achievements and motives always set on one’s take.

Juno is quintile to Jupiter. This shows that marriage will be of equals and joint actions prevail. but contention can arise if not given adequate control over your dealings
Here a joint understanding rather than emotional merging serve to bring you together.

These two planes are mutually exclusive as the singular egotism of Pluto preclude a emotionally intimate love to flourish or develop.

Juno/Uranus shows a sparkling brilliance of psychic and mental influences . but you keep this clarity shaded as your light has brought more than you wanted before.
This is a jewel of efficiently and gives you a intrinsic control of your profession activities. At the expense of environmental options of expansion.
This seems to be the quandary as the Pluto/jup/venus looks toward powers of a overlord.
Less control but gain space ,but space with less constants. saturn square the vertex has weaken you since your breakup. Now you question your inner brilliance, beware not to unconsciously seek compensation form selfish gains to assuage your emotional void.

The period began with venus septile to the SN on the 18th of august. the emotional confusion etc. started to totally preoccupy your attitude. This work continues til a resolution is reached nov 23 -29

The influence of Pluto was very powerful from sept 8 -14. Likely a period of reclusion as any action promised trouble.
rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Thanks...
Question isn't my mercury sextile Uranus/Juno... Or are you using a different system...

With my x husband, we never separated or talked or considered divorce..
We were physically separated by unforeseen unusual forces, his karma I guess.
It started with a series of un controllable circumstances..
I can explain more, but prefer to do so in a pm... If needed.. These events started in dec07, then through all of 08 we were handling it..
But....
Then in feb of 09 the events escalated, we were physically separated, then by October of 09
I started dealing with this other relationship..

So I've been trying to get my head straight ever since..
 

rahu

Banned
my mistake, what i was focusing on was the mercury/uranus,mercury/juno,moon/juno, and moon /uranus midpoints conjunct the vertex.your mental prowess and efficiency coming from the sextile.

rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
his lilth is conjunct my Sun, moon, mercury
sextile my Uranus
lilth sq lilith

my lilith conjunct his Uranus
my lilith sextile his venus

this is the black crescent moon one, in the drop down box on astro..

it's included on the synastry on the previous page.
 

rahu

Banned
That’s what I thought. Your connection is from the lilth aspects and hence you both affect each other in a subliminal way. that is ,your most primitive emotional feelings are enervated.

You affect each other from underneath the personality structure’s resistance to compromise.

He read or intuits every and each change of emotional, mental and social grace.
You can read him off the astral.very unnervy as you have the insights to him that he hasn’t found yet.
the nature of lilth strength and symbol is so seminal that the nature of life does not always show these dynamics distinctly. I see lilth as a preconscious and pre-emotional sensitivity .
But here Uranus is included which takes your lilth into a structural role .

I still stand weighing the contrast between the sun/Saturn/moon/Pluto biquintile/quintile pattern. With midpoints concentrated on Saturn at the Nadir and balancing this is the ethereal sense connections of these dynamics that will never play out well for you.

And with the composite mars/Uranus midpoint and the vertex being transited square by the dragon………it is not likely long term. though i guess it is long term as you and he have danced this dance for several years.
rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Rahu.. I completely and totally appreciate your help...
As I've said before, I know deep down inside we can't make it work...

My main question is the deep connection/ and the not being able to let go..
Why we keep going back and fourth...
Mainly why does it seem like fate brings us back...

If the relationship would have just ended, and that was that... I wouldn't have ever really discussed it...

I guess I'm looking for reasons...

I don't doubt he cares in his own way, that's all I need to know from him...
I just need space to get over him, and I can't get that space...
The more we are around each other, the more the attraction grows and the more we communicate..

This week, I could really feel his attraction coming back..
Basically I have been ignoring his hints... And replying with stupid "misunderstanding" comments..

Like we were texting, and he asked me how far I was willing to go for him..
I said well I'm around "city name" you needed something around here??
Lmao!!!
I don't think he laughed, but I sure did..:whistling:

Yesterday we had a tiff, nothing major mostly a misunderstanding...
He got really mad, saying I'm so sick and tired of these misunderstandings with you!!!!
But we talked about it, and resolved it..

Now he's just become more boulder with his hints...
Today I just ignored it and changed the subject...

When he actually spits out what he wants, I'm going to tell him, I like it the way it is... That it's not a good idea...
The only problem with that, when I do... He comes even harder at me...
It's a loose/loose situation...

Basically we drive each other completely and totally nuts!!!!

Do you think this is the Lilith energy causing all of this...

I've wondered about the Lilith contacts, but I can't find much on it...
So if you have anything else to add, I would appreciate it...
 

rahu

Banned
lion o ness
yes
as this reading went on, anything i saw was interesting but not explaining the energy that has you "captivated". i have done charts where uranus/lilth aspects explained behavior and feeling accurately. as both your name asteroids were conjunct your respective uranus', it had to be that the energy involves lilth and uranus.
finally here,after considering your furthur qualifications of this connection ,
it had to be a astral/Uranus connection to subconscious/lilth emotional dynamics.
In your case ,your psychic/astral energies are felt by him directly. Anytime you think of him your brain itches.
With his lilth aspected to your mercury/moon,sun stellium, he gets under your skin without trying. But he is receptive of an energy of emotional intimacy that he doesn’t understand.but he absolutely can read you smallest movement.

I suggest you look at the lilth midpoints in your synastric chart. See what has transited it recently if anything




i noticed you had a mercury/sun/moon conjunction. following the beliefs of isabel hickey, i believe these planets rule body/spirit and soul. this implies that you are a old an developed soul to have the resources of this spiritual trinity in this embodiedment.
it also implies tha as a dispenser of light, you are going to have dark forces trying to shake your faith in yourselve and your light.
this is all the more important because we are living in an "end of time" historical epoch.

rahu

he senses the most sacred and fundemental feelings in you.
we are working with the synatsry now as the purely ego driven motives are prevailing.


I suggest you look at the lilth midpoints in your synastric chart. See what has transited it recently if anything.

rahu

 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
My Lilith is at 18 Scorpio, his at 14 Leo

The midpoint between us is around 1 libra...
Which is conjunct my natal Pluto.

Transit Nn has passed over it... Saturn is coming up in it....

Since we have been in the same office, we are getting along and the attraction builds with really no outlet, it drives me crazy...
I can't sleep at night... I don't like being like this... Makes me feel really anxious.
:sick:
 

rahu

Banned
the transiting node was conjunct your lilth recently mar-april 2013 and the node squared his lilth in june 2013.
one would expect that you sensed the most "confusion" or energy about him then. if the lilths are the point of intersection.

it is still the pluto/jupiter/venus pattern that everything is revolving around. that is pure selfish advancement and ambition.

this whole thing still smells like a opportunity for you to be put in a bad light.

rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Thanks so much for your help.. I really appreciate it...

It's hardest on me, when we are getting along (go figure)
Right now, we are like best buds... But don't worry I'm not giving into him..
Just keeping the peace and maintaining a friendship, during the office sharing..

But I got word, I can move back into my office next week...
So hopefully that will give me the space..
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Rahu...

Can you explain, or see ( if possible) what this is... These weird type coincidences...
It's just freaky weird...
This is an example of some things that keep happening...


I had gone to lunch...
I had picked up some food, and was walking to my car to go back to the office, right by my car, there was a little red vinyl type of box.. I picked it up and looked around.. No one was around.. So I got in my car with it... I opened it and it was pocket sewing kit, a needle and 5 colors of thread... I said ohh cool.. You never know when u need this... I put it in my pants pocket...(not my purse)

I got back to work, and put my food on the desk, and the guy comes in shows me a botton... I said what's that... He said it's my botton, it came off my pants..
So I then pulled out the sewing kit from my pocket, and showed it to him...
He said, what do you always have sewing kit in your pocket???
I laughed and said noooooo... I just found it while I was out to lunch.. And put it in my pocket.
He commented wow, that's just freaky...

Which I agree it is...

What aspect is this????
Theses small things like that keeps happening..
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Hi lion o ness

This composite Is very singular. I haven’t quite seen on like this in a longtime if ever. It shows a relationship that is like pressure cooker, either the moderated heat will create great deeds or you will end up smothering each other. And I can’t really figure out which it will be.
The un/mercury/snode conjunction is opposed to mars/psyche/nnode. A relationship of destiny to begin with . very strong psychic connection with direct telepathy a times . you both seem to spontaneous make the same movements ,like flying birds turning in unison. There is a spiritual and etheric attraction that is more like the fascination of a puppy love rather than grownups. But at the same time the mars.venus midpoint is opposed to Saturn giving the deeper and practical feeling of the potential of committed love and more. the juno/Jupiter midpoint is conjunct to the node/psyche. So it can seem like a fairy tale marriage is calling you. This affects you particularly intensely as the eros/psyche midpoint is conjunct to juno. The mars/venus midpoint is opposed to Saturn ,again, emphasizing the devoted and committed nature of your feelings. the Saturn/moon midpoint is conjunct the nadir, so once again, commitment and devotion underlie the base of the relationship
This shows a almost unbearable romantic sentiment but with the promise of stability , commitment and marriage.
Venus is opposed to the moon and sextile to mars giving a affection that is constant and supportive with the sun/venus midpoint square to Saturn ,again bring a safe sense of trust in love.
Sun and mercury is sextile to Saturn and opposed to mars so all practical matters are harmonious between you. This bodes well economically as your actions are always on point and ,again, your movement are in total harmony.
The pressure builds up because the sub is quintile to Saturn and biquintile to the moon and Pluto.
The sun/moon midpoint is conjunct Saturn. Here,for the nth time, the focus of the entire relationship is on support and productivity. But if you actions are not in total unisonce ,then you will grate against each other and push and pull instead of progress. this places him as a point of resistance and direction. It he will lead and order, but if his ego structure forces submission of your will and spirit, then the tensions will build for explosion as Saturn is opposed to Uranus. This square is one of the few that can end a relationship by itself. It shows confrontation and obstruction between you. It can show external changes that affect the relationship. events that you have no control over.
Usually the quintiles, especially as seminal as the quintiles are here, would show a relationship broken by the inability to reconcile each other uniqueness without personality conflicts. the quintile is so reflective of personal uniqueness that it is very difficult for two people to combine the different personalities. But here there are so many loving, productive and energetic dynamics, that great deeds could be accomplished .
With Uranus square to the moon/Saturn midpoint ,opposed to the venus/sun midpoint and square the mars/venus midpoint, there exist that electricity one feels between two lover. An immediate attraction that makes your hair stand on it’s end. This dynamic of Uranus usually is found in brief affairs or one night stands but here ,even with set emotional boundaries, the hot flame of affection burns. As I said have never seen such a combination of potentially explosive emotional reactions, exist in a relationship that has so much stability, affection ,maturity and productivity.
Yet with all these dynamics ,you do not rush like magnets toward each other as there are deep and personal emotions or issues that restrict both of you for now.
The moon is conjunct to Pluto and the mercury/Pluto midpoint is conjunct to Saturn.with moon opposed to venus, the emotional response between you are muted and subdued ,yet deeply sensitive and loving of each other inner most thoughts and emotions are passed over ,the chemistry is aching for a first sign but both of you are restricted by issues from other relationships or emotional uncertainties.
But as you have posted, it seems fate has thrown you together and made the decision that both of you out of love and hesitation could not make.
With the stellium of the moon/Pluto//Jupiter, the environment becomes the workplace. a corporate or higher education intuition is described. And emotional problems between you could have dire effects on your employment.

The mars/Uranus midpoint is conjunct the vertex so he seems to like this individuality and usually this does not bode well for commitment, but there is just so much attractive dynamics this may not be a problems but cautions to never put him in a corner

It seems that since the summer ,the sparks have been flowing
I think in September you started to feel the devoted and nurturing potential he generates.
[SIZE=3]By December if not sooner the chemistry will take hold and going into the new year, I think all the gates will open and the extreme affection and emotional and physical attraction will overwhelm you both. January and February will tell the tale . if you and he have truly connected the future will entwine you both together, but it remains to be seen if the personal magnetism with hold through the satiation of the passions.[/SIZE]
rahu




I wanted to give you a small update about this one specific area..

O boy did you call this...
I moved back into my office early...
So we are no longer sharing the office...
He called me and told me hes not ready for this to be over..
I told him, no, that I can't... That it's not that I don't want to, it's just that my head is disagreeing...
He said ok he understood... A few days later he called me wanting to know why I blew him off, what's going on...
So we had that sincere talk about what I was feeling, and why..
He explained a few things to me... And we cleared some misunderstandings.
I told him, I will think it over, maybe...
But **** he's just so irresistible. Idk how long I can hold him off for...


It's my own mental trap...

I know I shouldn't, but I have this uncontrollable desire of lust and gratification that I feel we need to full fill together.. :0
I'm in big trouble here... :pinched:
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Rahu...

Another update. :innocent:
I know I'm a pain in the butt.... Hehehe.

Well you will be glad to know, I took a 360 direction change..

We were taking about trying again... And everything was going smoothly...
Then we had a small incident, which really really bothered me... It bothered me to my entire core of being...
To the point that, I no longer have any desire to speak to him...
I'm soooo ready to be done...
I've never felt this strongly about it... I'm just done with him...

I have been avoiding him, and any of his calls...
I've had some clarity hit me in the head...

I know at one point he will confront me, but it's not going to go well..

My only concern is the upcoming Venus Rx...
It will be going back in fourth over my NN, and it will be going back and fourth over his natal Venus...
I'm sure some doubts and rethinking will occur, but I plan on dismissing those thoughts, "knowing" that it's only the Venus Rx...
So I will be counting the 40 days/nights...
Once the Rx is over, I should be totally done with this mess...

Keep your fingers crossed for me.. It's been a difficult road...
But it's been one hell of an experience, that's for sure.
 

rahu

Banned
they're crossed:lol:

i think the venus transits to your natal node won't be as difficult as you think.now if transitting node was conjunct your natal venus, i might show concern.

rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
:biggrin:
That's super great!!! Good news...

Not just yet, cuz the orb is wide but soon t. NN will trine my Venus..
But around the same time Saturn will be squaring my trinity (as u call them)

But t.NN is headed for my 7th, and will then sextile my trinity... Hopefully by then all of this with just be a distant memory..
 

rahu

Banned
hmmm

the trine is a charming and gracious enery around you.
satrun square your sun/mon/mercury implies accomadations must be made.


rahu
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
Rahu...

This may be an impossible question to ask, but what the heck... I'll at least ask :andy: lol


Ok... So this guy, just pushed the wrong button with me and he backed me in a corner, and made me make a choice, when I told him before what the outcome would be... He resolved that issue, right then and there, but went back on his word 2 weeks later, forcing me to make a decision...

So at that point, I cut him out of my life, zero contact... Even though we work together, I have managed to avoid all contact for over a month...not seeing him at all..( we are on 2 different buildings/lots) easy to avoid him.

But now, I'm getting that whole "the universe" is trying to pull us back to each other...
This is what rattles my brain, and drives me crazy...

Since late last week, it's started again..
I was driving, looked at the car next to me.. It was him..
I speed away (not sure if he saw me) this is Los Angeles.. You know the odds.

There's been other situations like this, but I won't bore you with details..

So is this running into him, just coincidences? Or the work of the universe...
I'm feeling the pull back to him.. And fighting it is such a struggle... It makes my head hurt...
Is there anything I can do, so this will stop???
I know it's a crazy question....
It's just has me rattled up, and I just want it to stop...

What is this, that won't let this just fade away...
Please any thoughts, help, suggestions??????
 

Lion o ness

Well-known member
@rahu

Since you spent so much time and detail on this composite, I thought it was only fair to give an update of the dynamics.
The emotional connection continued on, which was wearing me down emotionally.
I went to him and talked to him. I told him, I was feeling confused and overwhelmed by our connection. That it was taking its toll on me, that I felt like I couldn't do it anymore. I said I know how to accept you not committing to me, what I can't understand is why your still around.. I said why don't you just walk away?
He "broke down" and confessed his feelings. Telling me he doesn't want to lose me... This went on.. He said if having you is wrong then I don't want to be right.. He said we are in a ltr. Don't you see it.. The convo ended with that.


This put a bad taste in my mouth, I sat on this for a week.. The more I thought about it, the more angry I got...
I kept thinking this is not a LTR that makes me happy, or even makes me feel good... I kept thinking about this, it was bothering me..
Then he said something that upset me, just a stupid remark, nothing major..
But I lost it..
I said, this is not a LTR that. Agreed to, nor one that makes me happy.. Your holding on to me, and being selfish. It's time for you to just walk away.. He said NO!!
I told him, I am meserible like this, and I no longer want to be apart of this.. Just walk away..
He again said NO!! Geez!
So I became verbally abusive (Leo style) demanding he walk away, to stop being selfish, and let me move on with out him.
After a few harsh words, he finally said You got it! And he hung up on me..

That was over 3 months ago. Zero contact
I'm still feeling some of the obsession, heck I think I always will. But that I don't want to go through this feeling, is stronger than the obsession...
In a sense, him just admitting his feelings was all I needed,( I felt like I was crazy) sense we had that crazy psychic connection, I could feel his feelings, yet he would never admit to them..
Knowing that it wasn't just me feeling like this, reall help. It opened the door for closure. Then he said we were in a LTR.. That was like a slap in the face.. I never agreed to this I'm not happy with this. Oddly him calling it a LTR, gave me the power to end it all..

Now 3 months later, I'm in a better place (regarding him) I don't see signs anymore, and I don't want to call/talk to him.
In the 3 months, we ran across each other 2x. The first time. We locked eyes for what seemed hours, yet reality was probably 3 seconds.
He was talking to me with his eyes. But I choose to ignore his message.
The 2nd time, I didn't even look at him.


On a personal level, I'm feeling a little unworthy of being loved or truly cared for.
I haven't been able to date or go out. I did talk to this one guy, but I quickly pushed him away. At this point I just want to be left alone, and I don want to feel anything any time soon. My emotions have gone numb. I have no more feelings left to give out to anyone. I am drained of all emotions.
I keep busy with crafts, and projects. This is what fills my evenings and weekends with. I have no desire to go out, or socialize.

Well that's my update, hope it some how helps with your future readings.

Thanks for all you comments.
:tongue:
 
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