Can astrology explain my loneliness, obstacles, and somewhat violent interests?

[FONT=&quot]Too long [FONT=&quot]didn't read version at the bottom

[/FONT] I realize that this is a stretch but i'm in a bit of a predicament at this point. Starting on January 1, 2015 a lot of things about my life have been changing. I suffered a major knee injury from training that required a surgery, which I put off for months and am now recovering from. I've lost all my friends, either voluntarily or involuntarily- voluntarily in the sense that i had a lot of "friends" with ulterior motives or were simply just trying to use me which I began to realize. I literally don't have anyone in my life that I feel I can really trust anymore, family included. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]On the plus side, I all of a sudden hit puberty late at the age of 20 and lost all of my face/baby fat, gained some muscle, and am now often told of how handsome I am, which is nice because I was considered ugly by many throughout my teenage years. I've always been a bulky wrestler type build, but have recently lost all the body and face fat and am now very lean. People constantly tell me how I look totally different in a good way.

Women often try to talk to me, which is fine at first, but the minute they begin to flirt with me, everything just gets extremely awkward and serious which either ends up scaring me or them away (usually me).

Unfortunately my social skills are weak and I'm a very shy/reserved person who struggles with making the necessary initial small talk with people to eventually form lasting friendships or romantic relationships. I’m not interested in many of the things my peers are. The only things that really interest me are combat and violence. I am not a violent person in the sense that I go around picking fights and starting arguments. I'[FONT=&quot]ve never been in a street fight in my life and am too quiet to confront somebody with an argument.[/FONT] I like studying armed and unarmed combat, they are the only things that truly fascinate me and can capture my attention for hours on end. I like fighting with other trained enthusiasts in the gyms [FONT=&quot]I practice at. [/FONT]

My second favorite interest would be listening to the “new atheists” (Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, Christopher Hitchens) discuss religion and its effects on society. I grew up in a religious family, but I remain agnostic on the topic. As you can see, I don’t think many 22 year olds are into this sort of stuff. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]I don't know anything about astrology and am pretty skeptical to be honest. I try to adhere to Carl Sagan's, "extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence", and I just don't think astrologers have successfully shown that empirical evidence as of yet. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]That being said, I still like to learn about this stuff because it's interesting and i'm quite frankly bored. Something about astrology interests me and I can't really understand why. I read a little bit about the 1st house of identity and how the planet Pluto in that house has something to do with the myth of the phoenix destroying itself and rising from the ashes, which is interesting/coincidental because I got a phoenix tattoo on my back shoulder a couple of years ago for no apparent reason, other than the fact that I thought it looked cool. It had no real meaning at the time and I was unaware of astrology and having pluto "in my first house" whatever that means. Looking back though, I got that tattoo at the end of 2014, and things began falling apart about 2 months after. [/FONT]

[FONT=&quot]So if you guys could explain to me why I'm experiencing the things i'm currently experiencing from an astrological perspective, it would be greatly appreciated!

[FONT=&quot]Too long didn't read
[/FONT][FONT=&quot][FONT=&quot]I lost all my friends; suffered multiple in[FONT=&quot]juries that required surger[FONT=&quot]y; [FONT=&quot]am only fascinated by combat/violence and philosophical discussion; [FONT=&quot]unable to to easily make new friends or form romantic rel[FONT=&quot]ationships[FONT=&quot], etc [/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT][/FONT]
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pluto in 1st conjunct NNode -

your purpose is to define yourself amidst through breaking down what has kept you down - not like uranus, sudden and explosive - but through slow revealing.

powerhouse.

what kind of physical training hurt you -

Jupiter in 12th lends hands to spritual healing of physical and emotional ailings.

Pluto on 1st is not shy, but it is reserved. Most folks can't handle it.

Are you MMA or boxing or balls to wall survival/physical training of some extreme sport - with Pluto in 1st - NNode conjunct and Asc in Scorpio - you are compelled to test your physical presence in extremity.

Your home life, background - papi is, or mama is - a real task master - do as i say or else - no wiggle room.

Anger gets let out by punches and old school fights for survival - likely projeccted onto kids at school who you wanted to beat the **** out of for teasing you and bullying you but you ended up on the wrong side of the stick? Or kids in the hood - your immediate surroundings.

10th house ruler is mercury - your brains and thinking are your success - not regrets of 12th house tattoos that seemed like a good idea at the time but somehow defined you and stuck you in a prison of your own makiing.

Are your tattoos gang tattoos?

If so - have them erase immediately.

you have better fish to fry than OC gang banging.

Venus ruler of 11th - your aspirations - depend on others (in 7th) but not others who are of the gangs.

What sports /combat were you training for?

Mars rules 5th and Mars in 5th - you are no doubt a great fighter.

Use it best in 7th/12th - helping others defend themselves - not for turf but for sustaining a good life.

If I'm all wrong on this? Please share how I'm wrong - I like to learn from the masters.

Namaste, Peace Fingers = K

Kitchy said:

pluto in 1st conjunct NNode -

your purpose is to define yourself amidst through breaking down what has kept you down - not like uranus, sudden and explosive - but through slow revealing.

powerhouse.

what kind of physical training hurt you -

Jupiter in 12th lends hands to spritual healing of physical and emotional ailings.

Pluto on 1st is not shy, but it is reserved. Most folks can't handle it.

Are you MMA or boxing or balls to wall survival/physical training of some extreme sport - with Pluto in 1st - NNode conjunct and Asc in Scorpio - you are compelled to test your physical presence in extremity.

Your home life, background - papi is, or mama is - a real task master - do as i say or else - no wiggle room.

Anger gets let out by punches and old school fights for survival - likely projeccted onto kids at school who you wanted to beat the **** out of for teasing you and bullying you. Or kids in the hood.

10th house ruler is mercury - your brains and thinking are your success - not regrets of 12th house tattoos that seemed like a good idea at the time but somehow defined you and stuck you in a prison of your own makiing.

Are your tattoos gang tattoos?

If so - have them erase immediately.

you have better fish to fry than OC gang banging.

Venus ruler of 11th - your aspirations - depend on others (in 7th) but not others who are of the gangs.

What sports /combat were you training for?

Mars rules 5th and Mars in 5th - you are no doubt a great fighter.

Use it best in 7th/12th - helping others defend themselves - not for turf but for sustaining a good life.

If I'm all wrong on this? Please share how I'm wrong - I like to learn from the masters.

Namaste, Peace Fingers = K

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I practiced folkstyle wrestling for 4 years in highschool. I started Brazilian jiu-jitsu in 2012 and am still training, which caused my injury. I also teach brazilian jiu-jitsu at the gym I train at. I've done some boxing in the past as well and am going to start again.

I plan to fight MMA professionally after I spend 4-5 years in the military next year.

I do not like starting fights or arguing with people and have never been in a street fight.

I am not in a gang and have no intentions of ever joining one.

My tattoo (only one) is not gang related. The tattoo is of a phoenix rising from a pile of burning ashes. I got this tattoo before I learned anything about astrology. (not that I know anything about astrology right now really)

Kitchy said:

then you know the Gracie style of take down.

One day soon it will come in handy.

Phoenix rising and all.

Keep me posted. I'm a huge MMA fan - discipline, willingness and no holds barred combat between two willing parties.

GLAD this isn't a gang issue - Pluto in 1st is always a red flag.

Sensei, Teacher - remember that about yourself.

You will be successful in the octagon with that Mars in ruling 5th - Pluto NN in 1st.

As for chicks - you'll likely find one just like you - sensitive and determined.

If you live with your folks - get out immediately.

They hold you back.
​

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Interesting. My parents never supported my wrestling/jiu-jitsu pursuits and wanted me to quit.

they are scared. but you are not.

get out. love them, respect them as a sensei would.

you can teach through combat training and battles.

great things ahead - they will be proud.

my husband 50 -

too old before MMA found it's safe hey day - from Torrance/Redondo - nonetheless, like you - Pluto strong in teaching young fighters how by showing them how to fight. He is 5'5 140 and the strength of a giant three times his size. Teach those who were bullied.

You do have a gift, your chart shows it.

Be well and keep B-12 at your side - no booze or drugs or gangs or nefarious users have any room in your destiny.

You have self-selected them out for your survival. Your family life must be dealt with the same.

Loving them and going your way Pluto NN in 1st - isn't pretty but it is rewarding for you.

"Mom, Dad - I know you don't like it, but this is who I am...."

The injuries and chick fear will stop when you do this. They love you but limit you.

Hello Alexander,

Welcome to the Forum.

Well as far as your fascination with all things martial, You have Mars in its own sign of Aries in the house of amusements, play, recreation, romance and self-expression. Aries is also on the cusp of the 5th House indicating mars is the "house ruler"./ When a planet falls in its own sign as mars does here it strengthens it. This alone points to a desire to either do very active, athletic amusements or ones that involve the qualities of Mars. Read up on the meaning of Mars/Mars energy in astrology and I think you will see how well this explains your attraction to Martian topics. Mars also governs one's libido and sexual expression and falling in this house would suggest a strong desire for sexual expression. Taurus also is known for a strong sexual, sensual drive. Your preoccupation with "violent" interests may be a manifestation of a frustrated libido? Or perhaps just a frustrated will in other areas of your life since Mars is the aggressive and assertive instinct that makes us go after what we desire - so in your case ther is a strong will that needs to be reckoned with. You may find your fascination with these "martian' topics wanes when you find a satisfying sexual life or a more exciting professional life that allows your very strong needs to be in charge or direct others is satisfied. Your Sun and Moon in the peace-loving sign of Taurus, so you see there could be some inner conflict here.

Pluto is also very strong in the chart since it too falls in its own sign of Scorpio and it is also made stronger by falling on the Ascendant. I have found that people with Pluto in this position (onthe Asc or in first house) are very guarded in their expression, very reserved. People do not warm to them easily, because you probably have difficulty projecting and expressing your warmth and sentimentality. This is because the Ascendant is the outer face we show to the world, or our style of expression and Pluto and Scorpio are secretive and serious and slow to trust , not an open book like a Sagittarius Ascendant or a charmer like Libra Ascendant. With this Pluto position your likely to be very direct when communicating, not likely to sugar coat things. Pluto and Scorpio project a very serious demeanor, not light and flirtatious like a Mercury or Gemini Ascendant. Scorpio Rising is usually known to have a very penetrating, even intimidating stare.

Uranus has been traveling through Aries and about one year ago or a little earlier it first came into orb with your natal Mars, which is a common indicator of an accident or sudden experience of some kind of violence. Is this when your knee problem manifested?

If you are interested in learning more about astrology, keep in mind that there are different philosophies and schools of astrology. All seem to have validity. But ultimately, the mundane uses (predicting events etc.) tend to offer only general indications because ultimately there are many factors acting upon a human being at any time including planetary energies but also ones' culture, one's family history, and one's free will. But as a tool for helping a person understand one's spiritual purpose and path I find it to be unparalleled.
Barb at thelivingsky.wordpress.com

Hi Alexander !!

I cast your chart in the vedic format Lahiri Ayanamsa.
The phoenix tattoo ... your 8th house of transformation, birth and death , metamorphosis, rising from the ashes .it has a stellim with 4 important planets Venus, Moon Ketu and Mercury in the sign of Taurus... Moon Ketu Venus being a very powerful conjunction spiritually.
Now the Rahu North node is in Scorpio Vishaka the branch. But it is in the second house which ideally belongs to Taurus !!
So one may interpret this as follows .. you may have to attain the nobility/ wealth( Dhana Bhava) of spirituality (Scorpio) only through your own efforts not depending on any one else. You can take other people's advice (including mine) only to a certain extent but you must strictly follow what your inner spirit says only. Grounded through spirituality..one may say. You are your own temple.
Your South node conjunction is very powerful and that represents the energy that you bring into the world. It is in the 8th house of transformation and it helps you to transform completely. The most interesting part here is that 3 of those planets (though Ketu us strictly speaking..not a planet) .. Moon Ketu and Mercury are in Kritika Taurus which is also known as the razor blade or the cutter !!
Maybe you are transforming with each injury, each cut that you are being dealt with.. do you identify with that. Your south node indicates ' Spiritual warrior'. Have you tried the eastern martial art forms .. you have the horoscope of the 'Sensai' maybe.. Are you able to 'sense' other people's energies ?? hopefully you will meet a spiritual martial art master to guide you.
One wierd question ( you are not the only wierd one here , you know !!).. have you ever sighted a peacock in your life and if so, when??
One more thing about these placements, slowly you may have to leave the Scorpio tendency to 'read between the lines' or not trusting someone and adopt the Taurean method of trusting . Give them the benefit of doubt and see what happens. The world will open up. Also Krtikka the cutter may have a history of adoption (Moon Ketu indicates a seperation mental or otherwise ..from the mother).. do you have some sort of anger simmering within you?
Jupiter Asc in Libra Swati shows a person who bends with the wind so to speak and branches out. It shows an egoistic person .. some may call it healthy dose of self confidence !!
The 8 to 2 axis normally indicates some struggle with sexuality or transformation of sexual energy into Venusian love ir vice versa. This society places too much importance on carnal or physical love.. it is not the only form of love you know.. as society wants us to believe.
I may strongly suggest Martial arts ..try all the forms to overcome the difficulties and ulitmately the greatest thing one can overcome is one's own ego !
Go after your desires and God bless !!

RaRohini said:

Hi Alexander !!

I cast your chart in the vedic format Lahiri Ayanamsa.
The phoenix tattoo ... your 8th house of transformation, birth and death , metamorphosis, rising from the ashes .it has a stellim with 4 important planets Venus, Moon Ketu and Mercury in the sign of Taurus... Moon Ketu Venus being a very powerful conjunction spiritually.
Now the Rahu North node is in Scorpio Vishaka the branch. But it is in the second house which ideally belongs to Taurus !!
So one may interpret this as follows .. you may have to attain the nobility/ wealth( Dhana Bhava) of spirituality (Scorpio) only through your own efforts not depending on any one else. You can take other people's advice (including mine) only to a certain extent but you must strictly follow what your inner spirit says only. Grounded through spirituality..one may say. You are your own temple.
Your South node conjunction is very powerful and that represents the energy that you bring into the world. It is in the 8th house of transformation and it helps you to transform completely. The most interesting part here is that 3 of those planets (though Ketu us strictly speaking..not a planet) .. Moon Ketu and Mercury are in Kritika Taurus which is also known as the razor blade or the cutter !!
Maybe you are transforming with each injury, each cut that you are being dealt with.. do you identify with that. Your south node indicates ' Spiritual warrior'. Have you tried the eastern martial art forms .. you have the horoscope of the 'Sensai' maybe.. Are you able to 'sense' other people's energies ?? hopefully you will meet a spiritual martial art master to guide you.
One wierd question ( you are not the only wierd one here , you know !!).. have you ever sighted a peacock in your life and if so, when??
One more thing about these placements, slowly you may have to leave the Scorpio tendency to 'read between the lines' or not trusting someone and adopt the Taurean method of trusting . Give them the benefit of doubt and see what happens. The world will open up. Also Krtikka the cutter may have a history of adoption (Moon Ketu indicates a seperation mental or otherwise ..from the mother).. do you have some sort of anger simmering within you?
Jupiter Asc in Libra Swati shows a person who bends with the wind so to speak and branches out. It shows an egoistic person .. some may call it healthy dose of self confidence !!
The 8 to 2 axis normally indicates some struggle with sexuality or transformation of sexual energy into Venusian love ir vice versa. This society places too much importance on carnal or physical love.. it is not the only form of love you know.. as society wants us to believe.
I may strongly suggest Martial arts ..try all the forms to overcome the difficulties and ulitmately the greatest thing one can overcome is one's own ego !
Go after your desires and God bless !!

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Would you mind elaborating more on "having the chart of a sensei"? That is interesting to me because I currently teach Jiu-jitsu at my gym as a part time instructor. My head instructor said he would like to finance a gym for me and have me lead it after I graduate from university, but I wasn't too interested because I would much rather compete in mixed martial arts. My understanding is that it is difficult to be both a teacher and a competitor at the same time and succeed at both...

As far as the "spiritual warrior" goes, that is also interesting to me because I visited a fortune teller about 6 months ago for fun (I don't believe in fortune tellers or psychic phenomena) and she told me that she see's psychic ability in me and that I need to become much more spiritual than I am now or I will never succeed...She also told me that someone will guide me on this path to spirituality and that I cannot get there alone

thelivingsky said:

Hello Alexander,

Welcome to the Forum.

Well as far as your fascination with all things martial, You have Mars in its own sign of Aries in the house of amusements, play, recreation, romance and self-expression. Aries is also on the cusp of the 5th House indicating mars is the "house ruler"./ When a planet falls in its own sign as mars does here it strengthens it. This alone points to a desire to either do very active, athletic amusements or ones that involve the qualities of Mars. Read up on the meaning of Mars/Mars energy in astrology and I think you will see how well this explains your attraction to Martian topics. Mars also governs one's libido and sexual expression and falling in this house would suggest a strong desire for sexual expression. Taurus also is known for a strong sexual, sensual drive. Your preoccupation with "violent" interests may be a manifestation of a frustrated libido? Or perhaps just a frustrated will in other areas of your life since Mars is the aggressive and assertive instinct that makes us go after what we desire - so in your case ther is a strong will that needs to be reckoned with. You may find your fascination with these "martian' topics wanes when you find a satisfying sexual life or a more exciting professional life that allows your very strong needs to be in charge or direct others is satisfied. Your Sun and Moon in the peace-loving sign of Taurus, so you see there could be some inner conflict here.

Pluto is also very strong in the chart since it too falls in its own sign of Scorpio and it is also made stronger by falling on the Ascendant. I have found that people with Pluto in this position (onthe Asc or in first house) are very guarded in their expression, very reserved. People do not warm to them easily, because you probably have difficulty projecting and expressing your warmth and sentimentality. This is because the Ascendant is the outer face we show to the world, or our style of expression and Pluto and Scorpio are secretive and serious and slow to trust , not an open book like a Sagittarius Ascendant or a charmer like Libra Ascendant. With this Pluto position your likely to be very direct when communicating, not likely to sugar coat things. Pluto and Scorpio project a very serious demeanor, not light and flirtatious like a Mercury or Gemini Ascendant. Scorpio Rising is usually known to have a very penetrating, even intimidating stare.

Uranus has been traveling through Aries and about one year ago or a little earlier it first came into orb with your natal Mars, which is a common indicator of an accident or sudden experience of some kind of violence. Is this when your knee problem manifested?

If you are interested in learning more about astrology, keep in mind that there are different philosophies and schools of astrology. All seem to have validity. But ultimately, the mundane uses (predicting events etc.) tend to offer only general indications because ultimately there are many factors acting upon a human being at any time including planetary energies but also ones' culture, one's family history, and one's free will. But as a tool for helping a person understand one's spiritual purpose and path I find it to be unparalleled.
Barb at thelivingsky.wordpress.com

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Interesting how you say I have a need for being in charge or directing others. I am a martial arts instructor at my jiu-jitsu gym part time. An associate of mine offered to open up a gym for me to run on my own after I graduate from university, but I am unsure if it is the right path for me.

I can see the contradiction you are talking about. I am a peaceful person, I do not like arguing with people or picking fights, it makes me uncomfortable. But for some odd reason, I LOVE combat, specifically mixed martial arts. I constantly visualize myself competing in it literally every single day. I like the idea of competing against another trained, willing combatant in a hand to hand confrontation with no personal feelings/anger involved. I don't think I am an angry person, though I use to be during my teenage years. Thanks for the insight

alexander1994 said:

Would you mind elaborating more on "having the chart of a sensei"? That is interesting to me because I currently teach Jiu-jitsu at my gym as a part time instructor. My head instructor said he would like to finance a gym for me and have me lead it after I graduate from university, but I wasn't too interested because I would much rather compete in mixed martial arts. My understanding is that it is difficult to be both a teacher and a competitor at the same time and succeed at both...

As far as the "spiritual warrior" goes, that is also interesting to me because I visited a fortune teller about 6 months ago for fun (I don't believe in fortune tellers or psychic phenomena) and she told me that she see's psychic ability in me and that I need to become much more spiritual than I am now or I will never succeed...She also told me that someone will guide me on this path to spirituality and that I cannot get there alone

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If your understanding is that it is better to compete, then it is correct in your case. Your inner spirit is your best guide.
I would think the same too since your Venus is in Taurus Mrigasira who lovvves competition (and also home food?).
Also it will help you get more exposure to various martial art forms as your Asc is in Vishaka ( the branch ).. you may need to branch out till you find 'the master'.
Also,the Sensei thing .. You have Moon Ketu Mercury and Venus in the 8th house of life and death which is a very spiritual house. Also Moon Ketu is a kind of monk who is an observer of life. Three of these stars are ruled by the Sun which gives you a lot of energy.
You are called upon to use this energy and ground it. This is a lot of effort. A sensei is a person who has mastered his senses and thereby 'shines the light'.
Also, there may not be any extra effort needed to 'become spiritual'. Just listen to your inner voice and be open to possibilities.
God bless !

Have you watched the Japanese cartoon show Ninja Hatori ?? Thats him .the spiritual warrior ha ha.

have a read of my post on epistemological solipsism linked in my sig you're likely way too young and too "pro-active" to appreciate the TTC, e.s. is a simple application of logic, the same we see in plato's allegory of the cave, jainism and buddhism ("intellect") and such.

by cultivating consideration and removing some of the "certainties" you permit yourself to experience life without forcing your interpretation into materialist criteria.