Hey everyone!
This is my first post regarding my chart. I have many questions, but I’m quite intrigued with my Venus in Aries (detriment) AND in 8th house, since relationships have always been a struggle for me for as long as I can remember. They can be magical, but painful. So my question is, how challenging is this placement? It seems like a lousy placement for Venus, am I right?
I seem to have no luck in love, I always attracted and felt attracted to the wrong guys (I’m a woman btw) and with time I’ve realised that it was becoming a pattern (which I'm trying to avoid now, but the attraction is still there). My timing always seems to be off too. Even friendships have been difficult, somehow I tend to alienate everyone or loose contact, so in the present I have very few close friends and it’s been hard to meet new people - this goes for friendships or potential lovers. The thing is, I seem to oscillate between feeling kind of "popular" (for lack of a better word because I’m not the popular type, but I do stand out sometimes), in the sense of people noticing me and being drawn to me, to moments when I feel completely invisible and uninteresting.
I know that there are many things that can contribute to this, but maybe there’s something in my chart too? I am trying to change some life patterns so getting some answers could be helpful.
That’s why I’m asking about my Venus. I noticed I have aspects from Chiron to my Venus (sextile) and Mars too (conjunction). My ascendant is highly aspected too, I’m not sure how it can affect me and my relationships.
Also, my Venus is in the 8th or 7th depending on house systems, and I do feel some of the 7th house traits (I feel both, in 8th and 7th), but I guess that could be because my moon is in the 7th… QUOTE)
Dear Whiteoak,
First of all, I suspect (don’t think there are any studies on this) that it is more common than not that young men are slow to commit or are in some way unavailable – even into their 30s. However, there are the ones who commit and marry, so the question is still a valid one. Why am I choosing unavailable men?
Jupiter is the traditional ruler of Pisces, the sign on your 7th house of marriage. Jupiter can exaggerate “things’. Pisces has a big imagination, is highly intuitive and empathic. Your Moon is there, accentuating Piscean energy. Pisces -Jupiter can see into people’s potential when on the 7th. In fact, the potential of a person seems very real to us. So, when we are relating to a potential partner and see the potential as a real thing, we can actually be attracted to what isn’t real yet – and may not actually come to pass. And our potential partner may somehow feel unseen, as he may not be attuned to that potential yet. This is actually difficult to describe – because it’s such a subtle thing. But Pisces gives a lot of space for imagination to run free, and I think when it comes to relationships, people want to be felt, seen, and heard as they themselves see themselves. Pisces tends to connect in love “out there” in a more spiritual sense rather than along concrete, practical ways. And that gives a natural instability. Someone with a strong Piscean presence in his chart, will more likely like your style of loving. It can be scary and maybe even weird to others who do not.
Jupiter is also thought of as the woman’s marriage partner in the chart. Your Jupiter is in Aquarius – the “I’ve got to be me” planet. That means, your man is highly individualistic. His focus is on becoming his own unique self. He’s a kind of rebel and “different”. Aquarius is ruled traditionally by Saturn, so it’s possible he could commit – but these types can be independent and not into doing the traditional thing – which might include marriage. He will need a lot of room and independence in a relationship. He could seem quite distant or aloof to you. Of course, it’s difficult to say much more without knowing more about any potential partner’s chart.
Your chart indicates that you strongly value communicating your emotions with south node conjunct Saturn in 3rd. This would no doubt be important in a relationship. A Jupiter-Aquarius guy may or may not be so focused – depending upon the rest of his chart. He could be more focused upon himself and his own creative projects. Relationship may be his second love, rather than his first. Jupiter is square your Nodes. My guess is, you may need to develop a less emotional approach to your potential partners. By focusing on working toward your North Node in Taurus, 9th house – perhaps that we make you more attractive to the guys you are attracted to. Taurus is more peaceful, not into emoting emotions at all. Your Sun is in Taurus giving you total access to Taurus energy. Taurus wants it simple and easy. It wants it calm. It wants it harmonious.
A Jupiter in Aquarius is going to be a bit nervous – electric – restless. He needs calm and not many demands put upon him. And you need that too. It’s your Jupiter. Anyway, this is one way to read the difficulty. Hope this helps a bit.