Psychological interpertation of this state of mind please

dandelionnn

Well-known member
I'm depressed, incredibly insecure. Could I even be crazy? What in my chart can represent insanity? I think my Mercury Square Saturn can cause some kind of mental problems but is there any deeper insight?
I always feel rejected and not accepted. I have no motivation for anything.
I'm wondering what makes me feel this way and what placements or aspects cause it.
I think my Venus square Saturn also never makes me motivated enough to pursue anyone even though I want to, because I'm insecure. I use certain substances to rid my feelings of emptiness.
Please read my chart if there's anything else you can add.
And I tend to withdraw from people and avoid situations or people.
 

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Caro

Well-known member
You have moon in pisces in 9th house which can make for sensitive soul.
you also have a cancer ascendant.(with mars conj)

is your birthtime accurate.(as I wonder is the mars in the 12th house)

you have a nice kite formation with neptune conj uranus in 7th house.
and trines to venus/pluto from moon and mars. do you do anything creative? are you interested in spirituality?

these are all beneficial so you may want to read up about them.ie they are beneficial in the right setting. as the trine is in water you are very sensitive so would suit environments where you can use this sensitivity.

http://horoscopeswithin.com/planetsinhouses.php

maybe look up some of the houses on this website and the aspects and you may begin to appreciate the positive in your chart;

having said that.....

Saturn in 8th - squaring pluto can mean issues with depression.
sun in 4th house - someone who tends to need time alone.(you have just had a saturn transit to your sun in 4th - which can be a difficult time and can make home life 'heavy')

4th , 8th and 12th houses are often linked to past life karmic issues(not sure if you are 'into that@) its linked to our family. did you get on with your mum but not your dad?

if you are depressed you need to seek help. maybe some counselling will get your life back on track.

you have a balance of easy and more difficult aspects in your chart.

just to add quite a few of your difficult aspects suggest someone who is quite defensive ie venus sq saturn, pluto sq saturn, cancer rising with mars conj. so you may need to look at how you react to people.
 
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tee_jay66

Well-known member
hi

quickly glancing over your chart I see you have an abundance of signs in water and sun sits in the 4th house. This makes for an incredibly sensitive and emotional soul but also very private and withdrawn by nature.

I think the problems you experience could come from your afflicted sun

The sun when strongly aspected gives us a strong sense of identity and strength of character. You also have sun square neptune which can be particularly problematic with areas of confusion to where you 'fit' into the world and fogginess or problems with separating fact from fiction

Sun square neptune can show trauma from the past to do with the 'father' image or provider. Was your father around? was he elusive or separated from you at an early age?

This could account for your feelings of not having an anchor in the world or a strong foundation of where you fit in.
 

dandelionnn

Well-known member
Hello! Thanks for the replies. Yes, I never had my father in my life while I was growing up. When I was just a child he was pretty aggressive and violent towards me and my mother, so I don't talk to him this day. But I had a grandfather that raised me.
You're right, I don't know where I fit into the world.
My birth time is accurate, according to my birth certificate.
No, I don't do anything creative. I don't know what to get into. Spiritually, all I'm into is Astrology, if that even counts a little bit.
I do always need time to myself so that makes me completely withdraw and it's hard to get me back out into the real world with people and everything once I do that.
So my 4th,8th,and 12th house is linked to my past life? I'd like to find out more.
I AM very defensive...probably too defensive. If I FEEL a bad vibe from someone, even if it isn't in person I'd get paranoid and angry at the other person.
I think I have HORRIBLE luck in love and that there's nothing I can do about it. I feel as though everyone just wants to take advantage of me. Could this be also because of my Venus Sq Saturn that causes bad reactions from other people to me???
Also, Mercury Sq Pluto doesn't do me any justice. Could there be mental issues involved from this aspect? I have no other Mercury aspects but this one.


Apparently I have TWO grand trines and TWO T-squares. Is that a bad thing? Could this have anything to do with the way I am.


EDIT: Caro,
I understand what you mean when you say my Mars might be in my 12th house. It described me PERFECTLY here: http://theastrologyplace.blogspot.com/2011/01/mars-in-12th-house-repressed-rage.html
It's strange that it isn't though, isn't it? Who knows maybe the hospital I was born in entered my Birth Time in wrong at the time I was born. It could happen? lol.
I'm no where near as assertive as Mars in 1st house claims.
 
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Lightrider

Well-known member
Hello! Thanks for the replies. Yes, I never had my father in my life while I was growing up. When I was just a child he was pretty aggressive and violent towards me and my mother, so I don't talk to him this day. But I had a grandfather that raised me.
You're right, I don't know where I fit into the world.
My birth time is accurate, according to my birth certificate.
No, I don't do anything creative. I don't know what to get into. Spiritually, all I'm into is Astrology, if that even counts a little bit.
I do always need time to myself so that makes me completely withdraw and it's hard to get me back out into the real world with people and everything once I do that.
So my 4th,8th,and 12th house is linked to my past life? I'd like to find out more.
I AM very defensive...probably too defensive. If I FEEL a bad vibe from someone, even if it isn't in person I'd get paranoid and angry at the other person.
I think I have HORRIBLE luck in love and that there's nothing I can do about it. I feel as though everyone just wants to take advantage of me. Could this be also because of my Venus Sq Saturn that causes bad reactions from other people to me???
Also, Mercury Sq Pluto doesn't do me any justice. Could there be mental issues involved from this aspect? I have no other Mercury aspects but this one.


Apparently I have TWO grand trines and TWO T-squares. Is that a bad thing?


EDIT: Caro,
I understand what you mean when you say my Mars might be in my 12th house. It described me PERFECTLY here: http://theastrologyplace.blogspot.com/2011/01/mars-in-12th-house-repressed-rage.html
It's strange that it isn't though, isn't it? Who knows maybe they entered my Birth Time in wrongly at the time I was born.
I'm no where near as assertive as Mars in 1st house claims.

Your "bad luck" in love may be due to your Uranus and Neptune opposing your Ascendant. You may find it difficult to stay in relationships for too long, because you and/or your partner value personal freedom a lot. It's very likely you will go from one relationship to another. Either that or you will hardly ever get attached to anyone. You are also a romantic, an idealist when it comes to love. You may attract people who share the same vision as yours, which is good and bad to a degree. You and your partner may feel a lot for each other, like there's some kind of spiritual bond. Unfortunately, when reality strikes in it's very likely you become disappointed in each other. However, you may also attract opportunistic and manipulative people who may take advantage of your emotional sensitivity.
 
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Caro

Well-known member
Mars in cancer can be a bit 'passive aggressive in expressing anger.

so maybe you store it up and it comes up at the wrong time and with the wrong person.

maybe you can start looking into developing a spiritual practice starting with meditation? they are various different types of meditations you could try. (trine in water element and sun in 4th)

you might want to explore how you can find a positive expression for that mars in cancer also. by reading about it.

also again I would recommend counselling to talk about your early years so you can try and let that go. sometimes we keep repeating patterns with the people we meet.

good luck.
 

StillOne

Well-known member
You have a beautiful kite situation and a T square. I think I'd just combine the uranus neptune conjunction and venus pluto and count each aspect pattern as one?

Venus conj Pluto
http://www.cafeastrology.com/natal/venusplutoaspects.html

Have you researched your Quincunxs? You have your Sun quincunx your Moon. Also Mars Quincunx Saturn retrograde.

Sun Quincunx (Inconjunct) Moon

Your perceptions of others and of life circumstances alter as you get older. As others misunderstand your intentions and you misjudge others' motivations, natural corrections occur for you. It is through concentrating on the core values of communication in relationships that you make major adjustments between your ego drives and your emotional needs. This becomes a critical mechanism for personal growth and development.
http://www.cafeastrology.com/natal/quincunxinterpretations.html

Also you may consider posting a chart with transits... While you're there you may consider reducing the orb size as well (80% or so)
 

dandelionnn

Well-known member
Your "bad luck" in love may be due to your Uranus and Neptune opposing your Ascendant. You may find it difficult to stay in relationships for too long, because you and/or your partner value personal freedom a lot. It's very likely you will go from one relationship to another. Either that or you will hardly ever get attached to anyone. You are also a romantic, an idealist when it comes to love. You may attract people who share the same vision as yours, which is good and bad to a degree. You and your partner may feel a lot for each other, like there's some kind of spiritual bond. Unfortunately, when reality strikes in it's very likely you become disappointed in each other. However, you may also attract opportunistic and manipulative people who may take advantage of your emotional sensitivity.

The first part of this didn't seem totally right to me because when it comes to someone I like a lot, I'm gonna want something serious. I have a problem with being attached...because when I like someone, I attach to them like glue which ends up hurting me terribly in the end. I guess that's because of my Venus conjunct Pluto. And the fact that my Venus practically conjuncts every guy I meet pluto.
 
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dandelionnn

Well-known member
You have a beautiful kite situation and a T square. I think I'd just combine the uranus neptune conjunction and venus pluto and count each aspect pattern as one?

Venus conj Pluto
http://www.cafeastrology.com/natal/venusplutoaspects.html

Have you researched your Quincunxs? You have your Sun quincunx your Moon. Also Mars Quincunx Saturn retrograde.

Sun Quincunx (Inconjunct) Moon



Also you may consider posting a chart with transits... While you're there you may consider reducing the orb size as well (80% or so)


So you're saying I should pay particular attention on the aspects that develop my Kite/Trines and T-Squares?

Okay, I reduced the orb and I chose Transits and Natal chart.
 

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dandelionnn

Well-known member
My fault! I was playing with the time of birth and forgot to change it back to its original. I re-uploaded the chart you can check again.
 
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StillOne

Well-known member
I'm depressed, incredibly insecure. Could I even be crazy? What in my chart can represent insanity? I think my Mercury Square Saturn can cause some kind of mental problems but is there any deeper insight?
I always feel rejected and not accepted. I have no motivation for anything.
I'm wondering what makes me feel this way and what placements or aspects cause it.
I think my Venus square Saturn also never makes me motivated enough to pursue anyone even though I want to, because I'm insecure. I use certain substances to rid my feelings of emptiness.
Please read my chart if there's anything else you can add.
And I tend to withdraw from people and avoid situations or people.
I know quite a bit about all that I bolded. First things first, you need to stop using substances. They will increase your depression and your insecurity. Yup, all of them. That's probably also why you have no motivation. Secondly, you need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. You can't look for a relationship to make you happy. It just doesn't work that way. That means you're looking for happiness outside of yourself when happiness exists within. Also, you need to look at it from the other persons view also and the man you attract most likely is going to want to be attracted to a happy healthy person.

Now, how do you get there? That's a good question but I'd recommend yoga and meditation. The yoga will cleanse your body and strengthen it. You'll feel so much better releasing everything and purifying yourself. With meditation you'll become aware of how your mind behaves and recognize the traps it's putting you in. It's doing this because it's currently wild and undisciplined. You need to untrain it and retrain it to work for you... not against you. This will take time but it'll be so worth it.

Also, in conjunction with all of that, explore your birthchart to know yourself deeper and use that to your advantage. You have a complex chart so it'll take some studying to figure it out. I'd start with which planets fall where and how that expresses. Then consider reducing the orb size to 0 and working up to 80% to see which aspects are the tightest. Those will be the strongest. Research your kite and find out how you can use it. You might need to meditate on that and other aspects of your chart.

I'm in the midst of healing at the moment. In the book that I'm reading I just read: "There can be no healing without hard work". Just in case you thought it was going to be easy. The quote is from a book called Meditation as Medicine by Khalsa and Stauth.
 
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tee_jay66

Well-known member
Hi

I understand your sun square neptune as I also have it and have problems with being in the outside world. Im also withdrawn and a loner at heart and extremly sensitive.

Your sensitivity would come from cancer. You know you can be so sensitive and so easily hurt you would rather not bother having to deal with external pressures because they are almost too much for you to bear. Sun square neptune has real problems in facing the harsh world....and your cancer and heavy emphais on scorpionic traits doubles this as well.

You asked about past lives. i wouldnt use 4, 8 or 12 for this. I would look at the south node as this is where we have our karmic ties from past lives and shows us where we have come from.
Your south node is in the 12th house (surprise, surprise)....exactly where mine is., and the natural home of neptune...the great illusionist.

You probably have lived lives withdrawn or as a hermit, maybe even solitary confinement or in prayer and contemplation. In this life you need to develop your north node more which will help you escape from the confines of the 12th house expression, and yours is 6th house.

How do you feel when you are helping others in some way? Do you forget about yourself for awhile? How about being of service to other family members in small ways?

Also...Pets.......pets are great for this placement..you can bestow all your love on pets....also look after your health more and make your body into a temple by feeding it nourishing foods and becoming more in tune with it to ground yourself?
 

tee_jay66

Well-known member
I know quite a bit about all that I bolded. First things first, you need to stop using substances. They will increase your depression and your insecurity. Yup, all of them. That's probably also why you have no motivation. Secondly, you need to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else. You can't look for a relationship to make you happy. It just doesn't work that way. That means you're looking for happiness outside of yourself when happiness exists within. Also, you need to look at it from the other persons view also and the man you attract most likely is going to want to be attracted to a happy healthy person.

Now, how do you get there? That's a good question but I'd recommend yoga and meditation. The yoga will cleanse your body and strengthen it. You'll feel so much better releasing everything and purifying yourself. With meditation you'll become aware of how your mind behaves and recognize the traps it's putting you in. It's doing this because it's currently wild and undisciplined. You need to untrain it and retrain it to work for you... not against you. This will take time but it'll be so worth it.

Also, in conjunction with all of that, explore your birthchart to know yourself deeper and use that to your advantage. You have a complex chart so it'll take some studying to figure it out. I'd start with which planets fall where and how that expresses. Then consider reducing the orb size to 0 and working up to 80% to see which aspects are the tightest. Those will be the strongest. Research your kite and find out how you can use it. You might need to meditate on that and other aspects of your chart.

I'm in the midst of healing at the moment. In the book that I'm reading I just read: "There can be no healing without hard work". Just in case you thought it was going to be easy. The quote is from a book called Meditation as Medicine by Khalsa and Stauth.

Hi StillOne

just reading your post, as i also have the sun square neptune and heavy emphasis on neptune and 12th house and have suffered mental health problems and substance abuse.

I started Yoga a couple of years ago and meditation and now do it at least a few times a week for an hour.....The results are amazing for the mind and it brings me into the present moment where I can live peacefully and without rumination.

If i leave yoga for a few days then my mind spirals out of control and I either become panicked or depressed very quickly....and then just getting onto the mat is the hardest thing in the worl because your mind is screaming against it.

its hard work and a daily battle to train the mind into acceptance and living in the moment. I try hard and the results are good......but thats the key.....you have to keep at it daily, because there are no miracles here and unfortunately the egoic mind always comes out stronger:sad:
 

StillOne

Well-known member
Hi

I understand your sun square neptune as I also have it and have problems with being in the outside world. Im also withdrawn and a loner at heart and extremly sensitive.

Your sensitivity would come from cancer. You know you can be so sensitive and so easily hurt you would rather not bother having to deal with external pressures because they are almost too much for you to bear. Sun square neptune has real problems in facing the harsh world....and your cancer and heavy emphais on scorpionic traits doubles this as well.

You asked about past lives. i wouldnt use 4, 8 or 12 for this. I would look at the south node as this is where we have our karmic ties from past lives and shows us where we have come from.
Your south node is in the 12th house (surprise, surprise)....exactly where mine is., and the natural home of neptune...the great illusionist.

You probably have lived lives withdrawn or as a hermit, maybe even solitary confinement or in prayer and contemplation. In this life you need to develop your north node more which will help you escape from the confines of the 12th house expression, and yours is 6th house.
Thanks for this. I also tend to withdraw and have cancer is the ascendant so I'm also very sensitive. Her moon placement in Pisces probably doesn't help especially being quincunx her sun which is at the very bottom of the chart... like mine.

Thanks for the bit on the South Node. I have mine in the 12th as well. I have recently come to realize I have big karmic challenges in my life. Where can I find more information on my south node placement? My north node is in Cappi however. So this lifetime is about finding discipline.

Hi StillOne

I started Yoga a couple of years ago and meditation and now do it at least a few times a week for an hour.....The results are amazing for the mind and it brings me into the present moment where I can live peacefully and without rumination.

If i leave yoga for a few days then my mind spirals out of control and I either become panicked or depressed very quickly....and then just getting onto the mat is the hardest thing in the worl because your mind is screaming against it.

its hard work and a daily battle to train the mind into acceptance and living in the moment. I try hard and the results are good......but thats the key.....you have to keep at it daily, because there are no miracles here and unfortunately the egoic mind always comes out stronger:sad:

I concur, yoga is amazing. It is the union of the mind, body and spirit. When practiced regularly it is incredibly transformative. I have had incredible results. Unfortunately sometimes I slip out of it then the mess returns...
 

Caro

Well-known member
This astrologer has done a lot of research (ie studied numerous charts) on our family karmic links and the 4th,8th and 12th houses.

its really interesting. I found it absolutely amazing in the accuracy in relation to my own chart. The 'missing link' if you like.

http://www.lifeastrologer.com/page3.html

you really do need to look at the chart in detail to get an accurate reading and much of what you see written here is based on general aspects.

its is a very interesting subject to study.
 

tee_jay66

Well-known member
Thanks for this. I also tend to withdraw and have cancer is the ascendant so I'm also very sensitive. Her moon placement in Pisces probably doesn't help especially being quincunx her sun which is at the very bottom of the chart... like mine.

Thanks for the bit on the South Node. I have mine in the 12th as well. I have recently come to realize I have big karmic challenges in my life. Where can I find more information on my south node placement? My north node is in Cappi however. So this lifetime is about finding discipline.



I concur, yoga is amazing. It is the union of the mind, body and spirit. When practiced regularly it is incredibly transformative. I have had incredible results. Unfortunately sometimes I slip out of it then the mess returns...


Hi again

It is hard with a 12th house south node. Mine is in scorpio...am I right yours is in cancer? both watery placements in neptune

Capricorn noth node in the 6th could indicate discipline as well as becoming more structured and practical. Finding traditional outlets of expression. family heirlooms, working with wood, becoming skilled in an area you enjoy
Capricorn can be linked to the ego as they like people to notice thenm in what they 'do'.....which is never condusive to inner happiness. maybe thats why capricorns by nature suffer from depression..who knows.

Ive a great book called 'Karmic Astrology' by martin Schulman

He states, capricorn north node is about finding maturity in this lifetime and letting go of 'dependencies'. Its all about practising becoming an 'adult' as cancer is quite childlike. The most difficult karmic problem for a cancer south node is learning to 'let go'., and becoming more mature and responsible.
 

StillOne

Well-known member
Hi again

It is hard with a 12th house south node. Mine is in scorpio...am I right yours is in cancer? both watery placements in neptune

Capricorn noth node in the 6th could indicate discipline as well as becoming more structured and practical. Finding traditional outlets of expression. family heirlooms, working with wood, becoming skilled in an area you enjoy
Capricorn can be linked to the ego as they like people to notice thenm in what they 'do'.....which is never condusive to inner happiness. maybe thats why capricorns by nature suffer from depression..who knows.

Ive a great book called 'Karmic Astrology' by martin Schulman

He states, capricorn north node is about finding maturity in this lifetime and letting go of 'dependencies'. Its all about practising becoming an 'adult' as cancer is quite childlike. The most difficult karmic problem for a cancer south node is learning to 'let go'., and becoming more mature and responsible.
Thanks for the tidbits. Yes, SN is cancer. I do have trouble maturing and becoming more responsible, adult like. I bought a house a couple of years ago and the whole thing gave me arrythimia. However, when I'm disciplined it feels really good. When I'm undisciplined or indulgent I feel obviously weak. Funny thing is that I'm not very dependent. Actually the opposite, very independent (Sun conj Uranus).
 

StillOne

Well-known member
This astrologer has done a lot of research (ie studied numerous charts) on our family karmic links and the 4th,8th and 12th houses.

its really interesting. I found it absolutely amazing in the accuracy in relation to my own chart. The 'missing link' if you like.

http://www.lifeastrologer.com/page3.html

you really do need to look at the chart in detail to get an accurate reading and much of what you see written here is based on general aspects.

its is a very interesting subject to study.
Thanks for the link! I agree whole heartedly. As I've delved into my chart I see that it is indeed me! I wouldn't have thought so a few years ago but there have been too many events to point me in the direction of understanding myself through researching astrology. It has helped me to awaken as a result. I'm very new to the study but having huge epiphanies already. Thanks again.
 

dandelionnn

Well-known member
I thought I had to develop my true node in Sagittarius. It pretty much describes everything I wish I was.
 
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