View Single Post
Unread 03-10-2014, 04:30 AM
YoGod YoGod is offline
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 53
Re: Worried about my future, feel blocked....

Originally Posted by virgo18 View Post
Hi I know how you feel.

What affects you financially is Saturn and Neptune in the 2nd. This is not bad, it just tell that you should have to use a better way to administrate your money, specially with Neptune which sometimes makes you spend lavishly, or there are incidentals that force you to spend "cash" which tends to vanish like water between your fingers.
It is also important to develop a healthy self worth. Thats very connected to our income and how we use money.

Did you change your job? Got unemployed? Or have you experienced some change regarding job in the near past? Uranus just conjuncted your Natal Sun.

I actually feel like I do a good job managing money, my problem is that for whatever reason since I've graduated college I've yet to be able to find a steady income. I do have incidents where things go wrong & I have to spend my money fixing it (usually my car, or some electronic equipment).....but normally I don't spend very lavishly. I graduated back in 2008 so this has been an issue for a long time but it's been bothering me more and more lately. (I've actually had another thread about this a while back)

I'm actually a DJ, produce & do music......but I also do a bit of graphics on the side. I design all my promotional material. Djing & producing was always my dream anyways but lately I've been questioning it. I've put my all into it but I'm still not making enough to where I can really make it out on my the same time I've been unable to find a regular job.I just feel stuck, not knowing what to do next. I'll have months where I make good money & then others where I'm barely making anything. I'll have months where I'm doing the some of the most high profile work.

I feel like I've been working hard and getting some success as I'm known within my community & have done some big events but I still feel like I'm on the outside looking in. I've been on the news for my work, I've been flown out to dj in other places, done pretty high profile events and it's been great when I'm working but when it's slow it's miserable. For as many thing I've done, I still feel passed over for certain events or jobs within music. Really just extreme highs & lows but I was never really making enough to move out on my own & just uncertainty over the 5-6 years has pretty much destroyed my self esteem & even my love for my passion and life itself. I think I'd enjoy it more if I had some sort of stable income while I pursued my passion but I can't get a job....I've tried everything. Contact alumni, recommendation from friends, 100s of apps, interviews, meet with my old school's career center....I mean nothing is working.

I've really started to question if I'm even good at djing music despite the fact that I'm am booked to work regularly. My self esteem is shot right now.

It's even hurting my social life because the uncertainty of not knowing when you're going to have money next causes you to save while everyone is enjoying what they work for. Most of my close friends outside of music are lawyers and/or on wall street or have really good jobs. They all pretty much live in NYC so I'm kinda lonely (more than ever lately) when I'm not DJing.

I turn 28 in a few weeks and just the feeling of seeing my mom get older is weighing on me. She's been really leading the family even in retirement but I feel like I need to do my part but it seems my efforts to improve my life just aren't working.

Last edited by YoGod; 03-10-2014 at 04:32 AM.
Reply With Quote