Neptune opposition ascendant

Hello all.

After learning as much as I could (or have allowed myself to) about natal charts, I have began my studies about transits. That's where you gurus come in.

So the other day, I spent some time looking at some of my ongoing transits and I noticed this Neptune opposition ascendant/conjunct descendant that apparently began when my life completely became utterly surreal: I found a way to leave school and did so; Lost contact with most, if not all, my friends; Dellusionally shaved my hair into a mohawk that ultimately caged me in my house for a year out of over-sensitivity (I had no idea I was so self-conscious!); Summing it up - isolation, tons of sleeping and living for dreams, highly intuitional, severely delusional, ongoing depression for the first year of, soul searching. I literally have just sat around in my house, living for whatever may come with the first year just being a complete mess. Fortunately, I picked up astrology and other occult subjects that have made it worthwhile and things have been much better after learning how to deal with feeling like life was/is a dream.

I do believe it is near its ending. I feel this surreal quality of life weakening. I may be wrong. That's why I'm here, to ask if you know anything about this transit and what not.

This should have my natal/transit chart attached.

I also noticed a new feeling that recently started - may be linked to Pluto trine Venus. Anybody have any knowledge about that?

Thanks for any interest/help in advance.
-M

You aren't secretly Britney Spears, are you?

Your Neptune transit will continue for quite some time yet. But the thing about long-term transits is that, at some point, you get used to the energies and start figuring out more productive ways to deal with them. I've had Neptune transiting my first house for YEARS ...a real pain, but I understand how it works now, and it gives me fewer problems. Learning to live in 'grace' with wherever Neptune is transiting, is a key skill to find.

Transits can't be seen in a vacuum, either, since you have ten planets roaming the sky around your chart.

Your depression was more likely caused by Saturn transiting your first house. This is a great transit for depression, especially when it goes over your Moon, which it has done quite recently. This has more to do with your personal sensitivities and the questioning of your 'personality', than does Neptune on the DSC. Neptune here has more to do with 'other people', and has many manifestations, most of which have to do with your relationships with them versus your relationship with yourself.

You have a lot of 'Neptune' stuff happening: Neptune transit of the 7th; an applying Neptune opposition of your Venus/Mars; a current transit of Mars over your natal Neptune...etc. You also have some challenging 'Neptune' in your chart; no wonder you've had a difficult time!

But the transit of Saturn has probably been the 'worst' for you, I would think, because Saturn's transits bring about very concrete manifestations: hence, depression, or increased responsibility, or whatnot. And luckily, at least in that department, the 'worst' will soon be leaving you. You'll soon have a Saturn trine, under which things may stabilise a bit for you for awhile.

AG

archergirl said:

But the transit of Saturn has probably been the 'worst' for you, I would think, because Saturn's transits bring about very concrete manifestations: hence, depression, or increased responsibility, or whatnot. And luckily, at least in that department, the 'worst' will soon be leaving you. You'll soon have a Saturn trine, under which things may stabilise a bit for you for awhile.

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Lol, thank you for the reply.
I did figure that a lot of the physical limitations and depression was Saturn in the first house.
I also do realize that when Neptune began its opposition, I found myself snapping out of reality much, to the point where I could not carry a conversation because I was so out of tune with reality. I remember asking many people, "how do you know if you're awake?" and stating that everything about mundane life was surreal. I literally could not tell if I was awake or not, nor could I speak with my friends because everything they said felt so meaningless. All of my relationships really died at that point, out of a quest for self-discovery. Everything has been surreal from that point on.

Although, once you get used to it, it's a pretty dandy feeling.

That is one thing I truly love about these long transits: what once felt like hell in the past is what is you acquire to love about the future. They surely build you differently.

T Neptune opp mars/venus conjunction won't be happening til marc 2012, do don't stress about that one now.....as suggested by Archergirl

I notice your saturn in 6th can give health problems, but it is qunincuxed Venus in 1st. I have this natally, here is cafeastrology interpretation

Venus Quincunx (Inconjunct) Saturn

You have difficulty seeing what you are actually responsible for in relationships. Consequently, you take on more responsibilities than necessary in order to insure the continuation of your relationships. Do people like you for you or because of what you do for them? You are easily confused on this point. If you are busy doing things for people, they never get a chance to know the real you.

*** personally mine are different houses, but i view mine as 'dad' or 'male figures' dont really quite know what brings me pleasure or makes my happy. They might humour you, or try to understand, but there is something about the way love and affection is given throughout childhood, that like with hard aspects, you may always feel that you have to give out twice as much love as what 'you think/feel' you receive back.....

I have also had T Neptune go over my Asc and needed lots more sleep, changed my appearance and hair to reddish colour. Everyone called me 'Cilla Black' so got fed up and changed it back. Probe felt much more sensitive to undercurrants than normal as well...

You have had Saturn go over your natal moon, causing financial hardships and emotional withdrawal.
Your sun at 22' is conj 12th house cusp of Pisces, with already Jupiter and Merc there conj Asc. Sol prob will always enjoy a bit of solitude, alone time, and need a bit of peace and quiet.
Sun opp Neptune can also cause identity problems

Your chart really does lack the element of air, no planets in air houses except sun in 11th conj 12th. Will PM this info, cos cannot remember author, so therefore cannot post....

Pluto conj IC/home roots, can suggest domineering, controlling parents or maybe even some abuse going on in childhood

Your jupiter (reality) quincunx neptune (fantasy) 12th to 5th house suggests Could do well in fields of music, young childrne and spiritual things. You may well have this nagging feeling of falsely evaluating things. Your expansive enthusiasm (jupiter) gets clouded, confused and disillusioned at times and could be overgenerous to the wrong type of people.....

At the moment T Jupiter is conjuct your Saturn in 6th house as per cafeastrology.com
Jupiter transits to Saturn test the balance between your desire to grow and to expand, and your awareness of your personal limitations. You become more aware of opportunities, and your desire is to grow, but at the same time you are reminded that there are limitations to what you can do.
Jupiter transits opposite Saturn Some re-structuring of your life and your business goals is now in order. You may be looking for new challenges, sometimes because you are forced to do so (because things are not going exactly as you had planned). You have a desire to grow and expand, but your attitude is tempered with some caution and feelings of restriction. Perhaps what you want to do is not exactly feasible at this time. It is a good time to breathe new life into old plans rather than to strike out with a new plan altogether. Some caution is in order regarding your finances, although you might find that you are able to get some help from older or more stable individuals at this time. Something is telling you to push forward and to expand and grow, but with a close eye on your limitations. Take steps to grow, but don't overextend yourself at this time or you are bound to face frustrations.

MichelleB14, I agree with what others have said in the above posts.

However, as well as Neptune stirring up all those 12th & 1st house planets - as well as your ASC, Neptune was also squaring your natal Pluto in Scorpio between (approx) early 2003 and early 2008. This would have created some opportunities for deep, deep changes within your psyche - and the houses immediately concerned have been your 4th (sense of `home') and your 8th, which sounds to me like you had your circuitry rewired in this house!!!!

I could not carry a conversation because I was so out of tune with reality. I remember asking many people, "how do you know if you're awake?" and stating that everything about mundane life was surreal.

As bizarre as that sounds, I can so relate to that!!!! Transiting Neptune is now going through my 2nd house, but when it was transting my 1st (forever!!!) my whole sense of `reality' was turned upside down. Many moons ago I was a schoolteacher. Now I look back at this and think: "What was I thinking!! Schools are a form of social control, and even subtle child abuse!" All a bit extreme, but there's a truth to it also.

Depression is always part of something much bigger. It usually emerges once you begin to plumb the depths of something much deeper within yourself, and it's a mask for the fear you first encounter. If allowed to be, depression is almost always short-term - even if short-term is 2 years, or even 10 years. It's an indication that you're at last getting somewhere, but you're not quite there yet.

Enjoy your journey :60:

Michelle,
Neptune oppositions are a horror. YOu can feel invisible. I have a cousin with Neptune on her descendant natally and she has had self image issues her whole life...her words, "the mirror has NO face."

Luckily for you your Neptune transits are temporary, but you need to learn to deal with them more effectively. Quitting school, etc, is not the answer.
You also went through a square to Pluto which made the whole thing much worse than it had to be. At some point you will feel as though you have finally "come into port - and will leave the ship that's been riding a tidal wave"...LOL....it's incredibly hard to have these major transits so young.

The important thing is to focus on a goal, find out who you really are, and begin your journey into adulthood. I hope you have some family support, and that you don't push people away who may be trying to help you.

The real issue with Neptune is always, "trust." Saturn helps you test people, but you need to know who you can trust. First you must learn to trust yourself, and if your judgement is faulty, face it and learn how to improve your judgement.... it is possible... focus inward, because facing outward is a trap with Neptune on the descendant.
LIN

As bizarre as that sounds, I can so relate to that!!!! Transiting Neptune is now going through my 2nd house, but when it was transting my 1st (forever!!!) my whole sense of `reality' was turned upside down. Many moons ago I was a schoolteacher. Now I look back at this and think: "What was I thinking!! Schools are a form of social control, and even subtle child abuse!" All a bit extreme, but there's a truth to it also.

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Michelle,

Please don't feel alone in this. Raven said she has had similar experiences, and so have I. I'm sure there are countless others, as well. Mine also began when Neptune was transiting my 1st (conjunct my Moon, really) It's because you literally have been asleep, spiritually speaking. Society has a way of lulling us to sleep. The Universe is trying to wake you up! However, if you feel too "spacey", you might investigate ways to get "grounded". That will help balance you out.

Raven,

I can't believe you said what you said about the school system!!! I've been saying this for years. When I do, people look at me like I have 3 heads. But it's soooooo true! Have you ever seen the movie, "The Wall" (Pink Floyd)? I always think of that movie when I think about the school systems. It's really about society, as a whole, though. Wonderful symbolism and psychological understanding in it. ( even if they probably were on some kind of drugs when they did it.)

FL

freedomlover said:

Michelle,

Please don't feel alone in this. Raven said she has had similar experiences, and so have I. I'm sure there are countless others, as well. Mine also began when Neptune was transiting my 1st (conjunct my Moon, really) It's because you literally have been asleep, spiritually speaking. Society has a way of lulling us to sleep. The Universe is trying to wake you up! However, if you feel too "spacey", you might investigate ways to get "grounded". That will help balance you out.

Raven,

I can't believe you said what you said about the school system!!! I've been saying this for years. When I do, people look at me like I have 3 heads. But it's soooooo true! Have you ever seen the movie, "The Wall" (Pink Floyd)? I always think of that movie when I think about the school systems. It's really about society, as a whole, though. Wonderful symbolism and psychological understanding in it. ( even if they probably were on some kind of drugs when they did it.)

FL

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Michelle,
When freedomlover said:

"It's because you literally have been asleep, spiritually speaking. Society has a way of lulling us to sleep. The Universe is trying to wake you up! However, if you feel too "spacey", you might investigate ways to get "grounded". That will help balance you out."

I can attest to that being the truth. Neptune appears to act in a nasty, self-denying and confusing way, but the end purpose is in fact to wake you up!!!!
In the US in particular, formal education is placed in high esteem, but it is little more than another tool of social control, to prepare you for `fitting in'. After all, the first schools were created in England during the Industrial Revolution to prepare children for the rigours of the factories, and nothing has truly changed much. Neptune comes along and then forces you to look closely at you - at how you are different, as opposed to how you are similar or the same as everyone else.

And freedomlover,

I had Pink Floyd's song, "The Wall' going through my head as I wrote the above post. It was only once my children were at primary school and I saw how they were changed by the experience - and not in a good way either - that the penny truly dropped. I watched the spark of inquisitiveness and joy fade from my children's eyes the longer they attended school. My youngest dropped out of uni in his 2nd year there claiming he couldn't stand it any more, because `it was just like high school, only bigger.' Both my kids (now in their early 30's) are now very alternative and anti-establishment. And they're both (financially) poor, but they both admit they'd rather be poor than lose their souls!!

I think that most schools are alike in the following way: they cater to the "average" student, and it's only in the last couple of years of high school will any student will get individualized attention, and then only if they are very very smart or a big big problem!
If you were or have a child who is different from average in ANY way, the local primary school may have done more harm than good.
Education is, in most places, underfunded.... and the planning of NEW or innovative programs is very very slow.
LIN

I know this is a very old post (and it looks like the OP has been long gone), but felt I should comment on this because I have Neptune opp Asc natally, and Neptune is in my 7th. I don't necessarily see this as a detriment. I want to see the beauty in others, and I think this helps with interactions in general. There was a recent podcast (I think radiolab) that I listened to that spoke of fear, and how the creation of fear can be sensed cross species. I think by seeing the good, the fear is negated, and so the person we interact with may not react to the fear many people project, and therefore be their kinder self. (Does this even make sense?)
I also recognize this thought makes me quite naive and dreamy, so I should be more careful. But I think I need the "fog" to balance the reality, because it creates hope, and we need hope to survive (or at least I do).
If this post resurrects the OP, I would love to hear other's thoughts on this aspect.
Thank you!