Never been in a relationship at age 32. Forever single?

Keki

Member
I am 32 and I have never been in a relationship before and I was wondering if I can ever been in a relationship.

From my natal chart, I saw I have a Venus and Saturn conjunction (within 0.14 degree) in my 9th house Scorpio.

I read other threads that people with Venus and Saturn aspects may have delay in marriage. However, I found myself very difficult to find someone I'm interested/attracted to (doesn't happen often). When that person comes (even with a little interest), it seems like I'm lacking dating experiences/interaction skills. I can be judgemental at times, because when I know I have no love interest in a person, I quickly dismissed them (usually 1 date), and prefer not to get involved in a relationship with someone I knew I will not be interested. I also felt like it is not easy to open up to someone easily, especially in front of someone that I just met.

I have attached my natal chart.

Any insights would be greatly appreciated.

Newbie
 

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Alkaid

Active member
The Venus Saturn conjunction is one reason, it is quite tight. Saturn definitely inhibits the expression of Venus. Especially in Scorpio, since Venus is in her detriment and Saturn has no debility. Luckily it is separating.Venus squares your ascendant as well.

Beyond that you have a really tight applying quincunx between your sun and moon indicating a general separation between men and women in your life, which seems to apply to your love life more specifically as well. Most likely your mom and dad were not on the same page or extremely different, if they were together at all.

Another problem seems to be that your venus' dispositer is also debilitated in Libra and is thus inconjunct both Saturn and venus, making that configuration more problematic.

However, your venus is in a great house (10th whole sign) and in the 5th from your pof? So there should not be a lack of opportunities.

The problem with a debilitated venus in great houses is that when someone good does come along the native finds a way to ***** it up by their actions or saying that the person doesn't live up to some unrealistic standard. When it comes down to it essential dignity is about the planets character, so you have a lot to learn about love and dating.

It looks like you will have relationships eventually however. Your sun (which rules the 7th) is in the 11th and dignified by triplicity and it's dispositer Jupiter is in the same sign, but combust, although somewhat mitigated by the fact that both planets have essential dignity. Plus our sun trines the 7th house.
 

ashriia

Well-known member
Your chart astrologically is really interesting to me. This is a little off topic and if you don't mind that i ask, what kind of work do you do? I don't think I've ever seen a chart with no aspects to the mid heaven before, so from a learning perspective it would be really helpful.
 

Keki

Member
Thank you Alkaid for your thorough analysis. You are very correct, my parents have separated when I was young. I don't think I had an awful lot of opportunities.. Maybe a few, hopefully it will be better in the future. ;) Even though it sounded like I have a lot of bad aspects in my chart, but I hope you are correct again that eventually I could experience love/be in a relationship. I am just finger crossing that I don't have to wait until I'm in my 40's...

For ashriia, I'm an engineer.

RE Kitchy, as mentioned above, my parents relationships were not good. This may negatively impacted my views on relationships. Therefore, I may be more cautious from entering into a relationship.

Patmp, I guess this makes me feel a bit better since I don't have a good relationship chart. I was attracted/interested in a few men (e.g. I could literally count them with my one hand in my entire life).. I'm not sure if this is the Scorpio energy or not, but I prefer not to be in a relationship at all unless I like the person. It is very frustrating for me too.. because when someone good comes along, i may be nervous/awkward because I didn't have much opportunities to get along with men (I went to an all girls school). I am also shy and quiet in front of strangers, so I don't look too approachable until I know them better.
 

Keki

Member
Hi Patmp,

Even though we have never been in a relationship for different reasons, but I think our past experiences and our traits are quite similar. I cannot hold a conversation in front of a stranger too.. However, I can be quite talkative when I get to know them better. It may not be astrological related, but it is interesting to see if your own birth chart can give you some clues.

From this post, I've also learn something new. Alkaid used methods that I've never read before. I'm a newbie who is interested in astrology. Even though this post may not help me in my current situation or tell me when I will meet a guy, but it is still nice to exchange ideas/knowledge.

I am 20 days older than you and I know how you feel. My I divorced when I was 8 years old.
I am also shy and can not hold a conversation for a long time.
Men are interested in me but unfortunately they never want something serious. They are already married (and only want sex) or are emotionally unavailable. The bad thing is that now I got used to being alone:crying:

So I think we have never been in a relationship for differents reasons. That's why I think is not something astrological related.
 

Keki

Member
Hehe.. I think I saw your chart from another thread. I don't know what that means, but you could ask the experts. Let's hope it is something good!:happy:

This is true for me: I am shy but I can hold a conversation when I know the person well. I can post my chart here but this is not my thread and I don't want to hijack yours!
In march this year there was a lunar eclipse conjunct my natal descendant and mars. I still don't know what it's mean but I hope is something good!
 

cherrybelle

Well-known member
I am 20 days older than you and I know how you feel. My friends are all married or in a serious relationship, thinking about marriage and children, but I am here trying to have my first serious relationship.
My parents divorced when I was 8 years old.
I am also shy and can not hold a conversation for a long time.
Men are interested in me but unfortunately they never want something serious. They are already married (and only want sex) or are emotionally unavailable. The bad thing is that now I got used to being alone:crying:

So I think we have never been in a relationship for differents reasons. That's why I think is not something astrological related.

I'm almost 31. I've had a lot of failure relationships. I started dating in young age, thought I would get married at my 20s, but I'm still single now. I really hate it whenever I get wedding invitation lol.

My ex fiance cancelled the wedding 2 weeks before the day when I was 23, then not long after that my bff confessed to me that he loved me and I had 7 years on-off relationship that was nothing even near to marriage (he never proposed and was abusive, after the broke up I knew he changed for his new gf and is about to get married). My ex boyfriends told me how good gf I was but all of them left me alone for other women. Most men I dated are married now, they married to the woman they met right after broke up with me lol. It's like if a man wants to find his soulmate, he needs to hurt me first.

Being in a many failure relationships is not nice. :annoyed:
 

NRodin

Well-known member
Well the Aquarius rising means you're naturally quite detached, and it looks like you have the Aries/Libra interception if i'm not mistaken; I too have this interception and i'm always single lol. it's not really that abnormal to be single at your age, it just is in contrast to the world's expectations. What's the difference between someone who dates on and off for 20 years and finds a soul mate or life partner at 34, versus someone who is single until the same age and that person's first relationship happens to turn out to be the only one because it is a success? Life is all about growth and self understanding, and once you understand yourself better you simply pick someone who compliments it, and it happens quite easily once you're in that phase. Don't worry as much about how the numbers add up, worry about the next step in your development.
 

Keki

Member
Very true. It doesn't really matter whether I have only one or several relationships in the end. I was only afraid I worry that I will not even have one in a lifetime.

It is true I am quite detached compare to my other girl friends. I do have an interception but it is Pisces/Virgo in 1st and 7th house respectively.

Well the Aquarius rising means you're naturally quite detached, and it looks like you have the Aries/Libra interception if i'm not mistaken; I too have this interception and i'm always single lol. it's not really that abnormal to be single at your age, it just is in contrast to the world's expectations. What's the difference between someone who dates on and off for 20 years and finds a soul mate or life partner at 34, versus someone who is single until the same age and that person's first relationship happens to turn out to be the only one because it is a success? Life is all about growth and self understanding, and once you understand yourself better you simply pick someone who compliments it, and it happens quite easily once you're in that phase. Don't worry as much about how the numbers add up, worry about the next step in your development.
 

muchacho

Well-known member
Keki, can you post your birth details? I'd like to take a look at the vedic chart because the tropical chart doesn't actually look like it is supporting your situation.
 

Keki

Member
Thank you muchacho. I have attached another birthchart just in case the image was bad on the first one. According to my birth certificate, I was born on Dec 17, 1983 at 10:48 am at Tulsa, OK, USA.

Many thanks.

Keki:tongue:

Keki, can you post your birth details? I'd like to take a look at the vedic chart because the tropical chart doesn't actually look like it is supporting your situation.
 

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muchacho

Well-known member
muchacho,

I know this is not my thread but Keki and I have never been in a relationship although for different reasons.
I would love to have my vedic chart read. If it is not asking too much, would you read mine? I know this thread is not mine and I don't want to mess up this one.
Sure, just start a new thread in the vedic section.
 

muchacho

Well-known member
Thank you muchacho. I have attached another birthchart just in case the image was bad on the first one. According to my birth certificate, I was born on Dec 17, 1983 at 10:48 am at Tulsa, OK, USA.

Many thanks.

Keki:tongue:

Well, in the vedic chart(s) it's rather clear. Capricorn rising so chart ruler is Saturn and rather strong, Venus as ruler of 5th with Saturn again, Moon as ruler of 7th with Rahu (north node). Sun in 12th, Mercury as ruler of 9th in 12th and Jupiter as ruler of 12th in 11th. So this looks like major delay(Saturn), unconventional circumstances (Rahu, 11th) and probably a connection to far away places or foreigners (Jupiter, 12th).

In the Chandra Lagna chart (using Moon sign as 1st house), Venus, which is also chart ruler, is in 6th as ruler of 6th with Saturn which could mean major delays and setbacks but also the power and energy to overcome them (your Venus is strong). Ketu (south node) and Jupiter in your 7th, 7th house ruler Mars in 5th again.

In the D9 chart, Moon in Capricorn in 6th with Ketu, Saturn as ruler of 7th and with Jupiter and Venus 8th in Pisces. Major delays (Saturn, Capricorn, 6th) and connection to foreigners or far off places (Venus, Jupiter, Saturn in Pisces, Sun in 9th)

So this is a rather clear message, all 3 charts indicate major delay and more luck in far away places or with foreigners. And since the 5th is involved too, romance plays a role there as well. Also, with such a strong Saturn influence, you are probably more influenced by tradition, societal expectations and older people than the mindset of your own generation. Which means you want to do it right, you take it very serious and you probably don't like to experiment or upset anyone. Which may be the actual reason for your relationship issues because a playful attitude is generally more conducive to making friends.

So to get rid of that overwhelming Saturn influence you would have to let your Sun shine a bit more in order to get your life in balance again. Just look at what topics Sun rules and then do a bit more in that area. Usually people with a strong Saturn influence seem to be much older and mature than their peers until their mid 30's so they may feel a little out of place, but after their mid 30's they usually ease up and things go much smoother and major manifestations start happening, and those manifestations are usually lasting.
 
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Keki

Member
Thank you muchacho for going through all the troubles to do such an in-depth analysis. Greatly appreciated.

You're correct that I'm very traditional and my values are more aligned to my parent's generation than my peers. I also don't like to get involved in "casual" relationships or mess up other people's feelings for me. Therefore, I usually walk away too soon. Although, in my natural-form (at home), I think I'm quite immature and young at heart.

Would you be able to expand the topic of "sun rules" please? I've trouble searching "astrology sun rules". I don't think I have found relevant matches. If you could expand the keywords a bit longer, I may be able to find it. I have never heard of this before.

Thank you in advance and all the chart readings you have done for me. Your recommendation is very valuable.

Keki

Well, in the vedic chart(s) it's rather clear. Capricorn rising so chart ruler is Saturn and rather strong, Venus as ruler of 5th with Saturn again, Moon as ruler of 7th with Rahu (north noI will never bede). Sun in 12th, Mercury as ruler of 9th in 12th and Jupiter as ruler of 12th in 11th. So this looks like major delay(Saturn), unconventional circumstances (Rahu, 11th) and probably a connection to far away places or foreigners (Jupiter, 12th).

In the Chandra Lagna chart (using Moon sign as 1st house), Venus, which is also chart ruler, is in 6th as ruler of 6th with Saturn which could mean major delays and setbacks but also the power and energy to overcome them (your Venus is strong). Ketu (south node) and Jupiter in your 7th, 7th house ruler Mars in 5th again.

In the D9 chart, Moon in Capricorn in 6th with Ketu, Saturn as ruler of 7th and with Jupiter and Venus 8th in Pisces. Major delays (Saturn, Capricorn, 6th) and connection to foreigners or far off places (Venus, Jupiter, Saturn in Pisces, Sun in 9th)

So this is a rather clear message, all 3 charts indicate major delay and more luck in far away places or with foreigners. And since the 5th is involved too, romance plays a role there as well. Also, with such a strong Saturn influence, you are probably more influenced by tradition, societal expectations and older people than the mindset of your own generation. Which means you want to do it right, you take it very serious and you probably don't like to experiment or upset anyone. Which may be the actual reason for your relationship issues because a playful attitude is generally more conducive to making friends.

So to get rid of that overwhelming Saturn influence you would have to let your Sun shine a bit more in order to get your life in balance again. Just look at what topics Sun rules and then do a bit more in that area. Usually people with a strong Saturn influence seem to be much older and mature than their peers until their mid 30's so they may feel a little out of place, but after their mid 30's they usually ease up and things go much smoother and major manifestations start happening, and those manifestations are usually lasting.
 

muchacho

Well-known member
Thank you muchacho for going through all the troubles to do such an in-depth analysis. Greatly appreciated.

You're correct that I'm very traditional and my values are more aligned to my parent's generation than my peers. I also don't like to get involved in "casual" relationships or mess up other people's feelings for me. Therefore, I usually walk away too soon. Although, in my natural-form (at home), I think I'm quite immature and young at heart.

Would you be able to expand the topic of "sun rules" please? I've trouble searching "astrology sun rules". I don't think I have found relevant matches. If you could expand the keywords a bit longer, I may be able to find it. I have never heard of this before.

Thank you in advance and all the chart readings you have done for me. Your recommendation is very valuable.

Keki
Usually the way you behave in public in anonymity is shown by your rising sign, the way you behave at work or school by your Sun and Sun sign and the way you behave at home in private by your Moon and Moon sign. So this can differ significantly. Someone meek and shy in public can be a real tyrant at home and vice versa. This also epxlains why the Moon and the Moon sign is so important in intimate relationships.

Saturn rules self-restriction, caution, stability, diligence, conventions etc. so that's probably already a big part of your life. The Sun rules self-expression, creativity, your spirit, vigor and zest for life etc. so whatever activities promote that, you should add a little more of that to your daily schedule. It will boost your self-esteem.
 

Keki

Member
Thank you for your informative answer.

Usually the way you behave in public in anonymity is shown by your rising sign, the way you behave at work or school by your Sun and Sun sign and the way you behave at home in private by your Moon and Moon sign. So this can differ significantly. Someone meek and shy in public can be a real tyrant at home and vice versa. This also epxlains why the Moon and the Moon sign is so important in intimate relationships.

Saturn rules self-restriction, caution, stability, diligence, conventions etc. so that's probably already a big part of your life. The Sun rules self-expression, creativity, your spirit, vigor and zest for life etc. so whatever activities promote that, you should add a little more of that to your daily schedule. It will boost your self-esteem.
 
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