You have a natal Venus/Pluto square, conjunct your Asc and IC. So it does seem like a lot of women would bring out strong emotions in you. I am wondering why she seems to do so more than others have.
Maybe it is her Mars that sits on top of your Pluto, triggering your natal Venus/Pluto square.
Here is an interesting explanation of how Venus/Pluto Natal squares sometimes show in relationships:
https://astrologyking.com/venus-square-pluto/
Venus square Pluto natal complicates your close relationships because of the intensity of your feelings. Not your general mood and feelings, but how you feel and show love and affection. When you become attracted to someone, this intensity can show as infatuation or even stalking. You simply fall deeply in love but sometimes your behavior can be threatening or overbearing to others, especially while you are young.
With age comes the ability to hide the more negative behaviors. But to have your goals for true mutual love fulfilled, you must transform, not hide, those destructive behaviors. These negative behaviors mainly center around gaining total control of the relationship, so that you need not feel insecure or worried it might end. This can result in manipulative behavior like jealousy, guilt trips or possessiveness.
Using your power to force someone to love you will ultimately end in a breakup, which of course, would be extremely painful and dramatic for you. But it is only through such intense relationships that you gain the self-awareness of your manipulative or controlling behaviors. Then you can use your immense power to positively transform how you give and receive love.
This process may be painful because you will come to realize that self-love is the real issue.
Once you learn how to really love yourself, then the unconditional love and approval you seek will be at hand.
Before you reach the realization of the need for self-love,
you may be attracted to dangerous partners or those who treat you badly.
You may actually be attracting such types subconsciously because of your poor self-image.
https://astrologyking.com/venus-square-pluto/
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Her Mars triggers your natal Venus/Pluto square. So I guess this is an important time for you to be able to work through that energy now, and learn what you personally need to know in order to move through it.
This is NOT about her. She is a married woman, living in another country, who just happened to be working with you.
This is not a viable romantic relationship that will ever happen in the real world.
You have never met her in person and probably never will. She is not purposely playing mind games with you. She is probably just trying to figure out how to work with you while you are imagining there is an ongoing romantic relationship happening.
So what can you do to get your life back? How can you regain your equilibrium and your personal power?
You need to somehow regain some clarity here. She is not in a romantic relationship with you. She will not be in a romantic relationship with you. So now what?
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