Confusion. Intense confusion.

[robots]

For the past 11 months or so, I've been in a terribly confusing relationship with a terribly confusing Pisces. But I just can't get away from him no matter how hard I try. We dated for 8 moths, but before that our relationship was pretty sexual but still in a friendly way. Not a friends with benefits type thing but a "you're my friend and I really trust you, let's have sex!" thing. It just had a different energy to it than a typical friends with benefits thing.
After he broke up with me, we ended up resorting back to our sexual relationship. And yet he acted like we'd get back together, saying stuff about how much he missed me and how happy I make him and how beautiful I am. Then a few weeks ago he told me we should stop doing anything sexual because he doesn't want to give me "false hope for something that he doesn't see happening in the future."

I honestly don't know what to do about this guy. I really feel like we're meant to be together but at the same time I sometimes doubt whether our relationship actually existed for the past two months aside from the sexual quality. His Sun happens to be on my MC, so I definitely regard him as the ideal person. Also, my Venus is trine his Mars which I think just gives our relationship a perpetual sexual quality that just comes back if we try to escape it because we can't help being attracted to each other. Also, my Venus falls on his Asc.
And when I first met him, I felt like we were just meant to be together. Like we were supposed to meet because something would come out of it all. Maybe that has something to do with the fact that my Vertex is on his MC and his North Node is on my Descendant? My sun/moon midpoint also happens to fall right on his NN.
I've also noticed that his Chiron conjuncts my Mars, which I think would make me a lot calmer because of him and him a lot less pained because of me. I find that very true. Since I met him, I've definitely become less outrageous and outspoken, but for the best. I was kind of a freak back in the day. Also, he's told me many times when we were still together that I make life easier for him and that all his troubles seem to go away when he's with me.
My Sun also trines his Mars and his Mars trines my Moon, Venus, and Saturn.
We also have a grand trine with his Pluto, my Mars, and his Sun and another grand trine with my Pluto, his Chiron, and my MC.
His Saturn happens to fall in my 7th house, which I've read can add stability to a relationship but also stagnation.


I can't really look at our chart too objectively. I tend to avoid all the potential negative details and only look at the positive ones. I'd really appreciate some insight on this matter. What do I do about this guy? Should I give up all hope forever or keep waiting for him to come back?

So what do you all think?
I'm the one with all the blue planets. The inner ring. He's the outer ring.

 

[astrologer50]

Welcome to AW,

It's so refreshing that you come with some kind of astrological knowledge and at least had a go interpreting it --- so well done

My Sun also trines his Mars and his Mars trines my Moon, Venus, and Saturn.
We also have a grand trine with his Pluto, my Mars, and his Sun and another grand trine with my Pluto, his Chiron, and my MC.

The first grand trine is valid whereas the 2nd one is not, chiron is not a planet neither is MC and therefore technically not valid.

Noticeably T Pluto is conj your sun (or about to) and this is a major transit for. Your mars in 12th looks to Apex of Yod formation natally and his chiron is conj this
http://cafeastrology.com/plutotransits.html

To further research Yods
Info on Yod’s
http://www.bobmarksastrologer.com/TheYod15.5.htm
http://asphodelea.com/yods.html
http://www.drstandley.com/astrologycharts_yod.shtml
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yod_(astrology)
http://realastrologers.com/?p=331
http://medicalastrologybyeileennauma...t-and-yod.html
http://thezodiac.com/yod.htm
http://medicalastrologybyeileennauman.blogspot.com/2009/03/inconjunct-aspect-and-yod.html

Chiron thread
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=9786
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=286
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17165
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=11976

You could have the best synastry in the world, but unless you have good communications, are honest with each other about your needs, wishes and desires and 'both' of you want the same things...........then nothing will happen. It cannot make anyone change, or love you more. Some challenging squares, oppositions in synastry can be healthy, and may require one or both of you to grow in some way. Astrological natal charts cannot explain environmental factors, financial handicaps/ restraints and what position you hold in society, neither can it tell you if you are of ‘Royalty’ or beggar.

I am of the belief that people come in and out of our lives for a reason, either we have to teach them something or we have to learn something from them. There is Always an exchange, good or bad.

Good luck with your journey

 

[2complicated]

pluto pluto conjunction in scorpio squares your moon, venus and saturn.

pluto pluto conjunction in scorpio trines your mars and his sun.

= he likes this as it is. he doesn't want anything else. you like this just because sex but you want more. you confuse this as love because those three planets in aquarius and it makes those planets appreciate the unconventional...

but your sun in capricorn not happy with this, squaring his moon and mercury. no real communication, no honest feelings. at least, that's how you perceive the things.

having moon mercury conjunction, i bet he is a smooth talker and knows what to tell you to keep the sex coming.

your jupiter also in opposition with those two. your self respect (sun, identity) and your wisdom (jupiter) says it's going nowhere. that's why you are here, you want to hear it from us. you are in the process of convincing yourself.

the triangle your mars, his sun and plutos in conjunction forms explains it all, actually. it's a destructive sex loop, at least for you.

 

[robots]

astrologer50: According to Astro, T Pluto won't be conjuncting my Sun until March. Seems like a pretty good transit though. And I do have a yod with Mars, Venus, and Mercury. I've tried interpreting it but it always confuses me or sounds off in some way. I'll definitely have to read more of those links you gave me. Thanks for all that. It was very helpful. And hopefully my journey with this will go somewhere or at least teach me something good. Hah.

2complicated: Huh. That's odd. That all makes sense halfway, but it also doesn't at the same time. I do at times think it's going nowhere but sometimes I think it's because we haven't tried hard enough to make things better between us which I think we could definitely do. We just need to talk about it. I've also had the feeling that he's been using me, but this feeling only came about earlier this month. Before that, it seemed like he genuinely liked me. Maybe I'm just delusional or he's an even better actor than I suspected.

Eh, I guess I'll figure it all out eventually.

 

[lalalaheidi87]

I think the answer is more in your own self ...
your 7th house stellium cause you to live and breathe through relationship , and you desire permanent loving stable relationship
but at same time you have mars in 12th ... meaning you work best and assert yourself behind the scenes ... your conflict how to combine these two things.
i see your birthday is coming up and pluto will soon pass over your sun so you will have very intense time to figure out all the issues about yourself

 

[astrologer50]

When looking at a woman’s chart the type of man she would look for is her sun sign and mars traits, plus 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.
When looking at a mans chart for the type of woman he would look for is his venus and moon sign and then 7th house planets and house cusp ruler and where that ruler was deposited.

Although synastry is a valuable tool with astrology it cannot 'make things happen' even if you have the best synastry in the world unfortunately..

If you want to research more into synastry try here
http://cafeastrology.com/astrology_of_relationships.html
http://www.cafeastrology.com/synastry/interchartaspects.html
http://www.cafeastrology.com/synastry_house_overlays.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastry.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastry-houses.html
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastryaspects.html
http://www.cosmitec-astrological-compatibility-advice.com/astrology-marriage.html
http://www.astrologyweekly.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17513
http://www.astrotheme.com/synastry_advice.php

Please remember there are all sorts of different types of astrologers, novices and dablers here on AW-- sometimes a little bit of knowledge can be damaging to the credibility of all

The square between the Sun and the Moon in synastry is challenging, and is compounded by the fact that attraction between the two is quite possible. The Moon person eventually finds the Sun person overbearing, too rational, self-involved, and insensitive--even if the Sun person is not generally thought to possess these traits. The Sun person eventually finds the Moon person too dependent, temperamental, emotional, and sensitive. The Moon person, in his or her attempts to support the Sun person, can feel resentful.
http://cafeastrology.com/synastry/sun_moon_aspects.html

astrologer50: According to Astro, T Pluto won't be conjuncting my Sun until March. Seems like a pretty good transit though. And I do have a yod with Mars, Venus, and Mercury. I've tried interpreting it but it always confuses me or sounds off in some way. I'll definitely have to read more of those links you gave me. Thanks for all that. It was very helpful. And hopefully my journey with this will go somewhere or at least teach me something good. Hah.

Mercury Quincunx (Inconjunct) Mars

General circumstances as well as other people encourage your reach to exceed way beyond your grasp. Anger and impulsiveness carries you way beyond your resources. Left in a highly overextended position, you can end up wasting immense amounts of energy trying to do what you said you would do, or running away from situations you created through lack of forethought. Recognition that your ideals are different from the actual circumstances sets you in the right direction.
http://cafeastrology.com/natal/quincunxinterpretations.html

Venus Quincunx (Inconjunct) Mars

You are easily led into doing other people's jobs for them. You want others to think well of you and get confused as to your real responsibilities. Learn to contain yourself in relationships and be more demanding of what you want. It can be frustrating for you to always be chasing an ideal and to not be given any real opportunity to get satisfaction. Clarity in your interactions and correct evaluation of what you really want helps to bring more joy into your life and gives you better use of your energy.


Mars in 12th is not good and suggests in childhood you were prob not allowed to express anger, tantrums and alike and quite often I have heard it said children have been sent to their bedrooms to cool down. Thus learning not to exert this behaviour cos it really didn't get them anywhere.

Mars/mercury has to do with communications and finding that balance and middle ground, this could exhibit as verbally commbative to acting to the detriment of family. Mars is cancer tends to interefere with family matters, but yours is a 'cadent house' and works behind the scenes
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Astrological_sign


Houses: angular houses 1/7 4/10 the energies of planets placed here are obvious cos it's your 'shop window' visible for everyone to see. Next the succeedent houses 2/8 & 5/11 the energies in these houses are not in shop window the are in the shop, but stood behind the counter, ready to come out when needed. Lastly, cadent houses 6/12 & 3/9 these houses/planets are not in shop window or stood behind the counter, they are in the back storeroom and only come out when 'triggered' or an emergency and much harder to recognise and access...

The houses are like the backdrop of a stage, the setting if you like, the planets are like actors and the aspects are how the planets behave in that settings/stage....

Now if you calculate the 'midpoint' between your venus and mercury, it looks like his Saturn is there opposing your mars (albeit rather wide) with midpoint the orb has to be very tight, 1' or 1.5' max. Now his saturn opposing your mars (the way you act and behave) causes frustration and stop/go situations and any hard aspect with saturn/venus, saturn/mercury is not good in synastry and it's the venus/mecury person that suffers and feels unloved and unheard.

 

[robots]

Oh cool. Interesting stuff right there. Thank you astrologer50, you say helpful things. Or post helpful things, rather.


I just noticed something, actually. He has Venus, Mercury, the Moon, and the Sun all in my 10th house which corresponds to Capricorn, which is also my Sun sign. I've also noticed that 5 out of the 5 men than I've had very significant kinda romantic-ish relationships with all have a Venus that falls into my 10th house. Does any of that mean anything or is that just a crazy coincidence? Doesn't seem like it would be a coincidence though.

 

[astrologer50]

Oh cool. Interesting stuff right there. Thank you astrologer50, you say helpful things. Or post helpful things, rather.


I just noticed something, actually. He has Venus, Mercury, the Moon, and the Sun all in my 10th house which corresponds to Capricorn, which is also my Sun sign. I've also noticed that 5 out of the 5 men than I've had very significant kinda romantic-ish relationships with all have a Venus that falls into my 10th house. Does any of that mean anything or is that just a crazy coincidence? Doesn't seem like it would be a coincidence though.

Not really, if his planets fell in HIS tenth house then he would have this Cappi feel. Planet is influenced by sign and house and then aspects.
Just cos his planets fall in your 10th house doesn't give him a Cappi feel and I'm an Equal house astrologer and the synastry bi wheel you posted is the default of placidus (unequal size houses) His Asc is late Aquarius and 2nd house cusp would be late pisces and therefore his sun, moon and mercury would fall in his 2nd house naturally ruled by Taurus and he would take on these traits much more than any other.

Venus 10th house Venus in partner's tenth house may denote a connection in the professional or business world, and an understanding of the importance of your careers. Material status is an important element in the relationship. The Venus person provides a sense of charm and diplomacy aiding the partner's career or status. This placement shows a tendency for the partner to place the Venus person on a "pedestal."
http://www.astrology-numerology.com/synastry-houses.html#Venus

Yes it means that you choice men (prob subconsciously) that get pleasure (venus) from being seen and public image is ultimately important.

 

[Inside Out Orange]

Difficult to see from that chart but your Venus looks like it's late in Aquarius. Jupiter/Venus/Chiron are all transiting this area.

I believe a Neptune transit of Venus could cause you to see the relationship through rose-tinted specs, and perhaps give that feeling of destiny / soulmatedness between you.

Added to that your Moon/Venus/Saturn in Aquarius likes the idea of being in a relationship but may struggle to handle the claustrophobia of actually being in one. That you've had a FwB type situation probably worked very well for you. Essentially commitment without commitment.