Why is my mum so unlucky?

Abby83

Well-known member
Hi everyone,

If anyone can read an astrology chart, they will be able to see clearly that the attached chart of my mother is a terrible story. The only thing she has going for her is her children. She can also make friends and have friends if she makes the effort but she ruins it by talking about how bad her life is and how bad her life was. So really, other than that she just has me :(.

These last two yrs about everything in her home has broken down one by one and she doesn't have any money. We just cant believe it. Nothing EVER goes right for this woman :pinched:.

To keep it short, as a child my mother was physically beaten and emotionally abused as an outlet by the parents and this scarred her for life, resulting in problems with work. She experienced injustice at a very young age. Every single man in her life doesn't care about her. Her husband (Uranus in 12th) cheated on her many times, even in front of her and then said she was imagining it. He used her, and deceived her in shockingly inappropriate ways.

So other than the obvious aspects, I'm wondering if there is anywhere specific one can point to a person being unlucky? I heard that Jupiter 1st house makes a person lucky so would that mean Jupiter 12th house is unlucky? With my mother having Jupiter in the 12th I think it's not that great. Her intuition means she experiences more harm than good from all the bad things that happen. I find it odd that POF is in 10th house :unsure:.
 

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Lin

Well-known member
Very sad. Very difficult. Very dysfunctional family she came from and no love. It's hard to become a functional, balanced human being when you come from so much misery.
And secrets....and probably addictions in the home.
There are so many negatives it would be hard to not see them.
However: your mom's worst dynamic is that she didn't leave every person who abused her and even made a life of her own in order to be able to take care of herself better than others took care of her.
The irony of this type of childhood is that you are trained to believe that you have no value and can't be an independent successful person.

Don't laugh at her. If you managed to grow up without the same abuse then she has earned her place in heaven.
LIN
 

tsmall

Premium Member
I'm kind of curious about what in your chart would make it easy for you to laugh at mom's woes...

She is unlucky in love because her ASC ruler Sun is in fall on the cusp of the 4th, and her 7th house ruler sextiles the Moon with reception from the fall of the Moon.

Jupiter in the 12th actually is probably why she is still here. Benefics in the 12th mitigate the harm of the 12th. Otherwise, based on what you describe, she would have given up a long time ago.

Her reasons for complaining are because Mercury conjoins Saturn. And while her children are bound to be healthy, as they are represented by Jupiter in more ways than one, they are also her secret undoing.

Don't laugh at your mother. She gave you your life, give hers some respect.
 

tsmall

Premium Member
Very sad. Very difficult. Very dysfunctional family she came from and no love. It's hard to become a functional, balanced human being when you come from so much misery.
And secrets....and probably addictions in the home.
There are so many negatives it would be hard to not see them.
However: your mom's worst dynamic is that she didn't leave every person who abused her and even made a life of her own in order to be able to take care of herself better than others took care of her.
The irony of this type of childhood is that you are trained to believe that you have no value and can't be an independent successful person.

Don't laugh at her. If you managed to grow up without the same abuse then she has earned her place in heaven.
LIN

This.

atleast10characters
 

Abby83

Well-known member
Very sad. Very difficult. Very dysfunctional family she came from and no love. It's hard to become a functional, balanced human being when you come from so much misery.
And secrets....and probably addictions in the home.
There are so many negatives it would be hard to not see them.
However: your mom's worst dynamic is that she didn't leave every person who abused her and even made a life of her own in order to be able to take care of herself better than others took care of her.
The irony of this type of childhood is that you are trained to believe that you have no value and can't be an independent successful person.

Don't laugh at her. If you managed to grow up without the same abuse then she has earned her place in heaven.
LIN

This post brought a tear to my eyes and I'm amazed you got so much from her chart. Your words are accurate in every way. It is very true that despite her upbringing she keeps trying to reconnect with it over and over again. I have told her many times that if those ppl did that to me I would never associate with them, but then again, I'm not in her shoes. I cant imagine why god would put her in such a position. Now she cant have any kind of healthy relationship with other ppl because she keeps bringing up her past. Is there any way I can help her? I want her to enjoy the one success that she has, me and my children and our success as a symbol of her success. I tell her time and time again that she is the best mother in the world even though she had such bad role models she did an amazing job.
I want to keep her away from ppl like my mother in law who would abuse her if she could, but my mum seems to gravitate towards ppl like that. I guess ill have to try harder to protect her. I need to find more ways to make her feel valued and loved but I also feel it's a huge burden to try and give her the love of 10 ppl. I can only give her my love and my kid's love.

My mum did a good job at building the guts to divorce my father and decide to be single. It must be hard for her to see me in a loving relationship and she finds it hard to see her sister in a loving relationship (the very one who abused her too).

PS: When I said laugh at her I didn't mean it in a sense that we are humoured by it, what I meant wasnt that we are extremely shocked and in disbelief that this is humanly possible and are confused why her destiny is so.
 

Abby83

Well-known member
I'm kind of curious about what in your chart would make it easy for you to laugh at mom's woes...

She is unlucky in love because her ASC ruler Sun is in fall on the cusp of the 4th, and her 7th house ruler sextiles the Moon with reception from the fall of the Moon.

Jupiter in the 12th actually is probably why she is still here. Benefics in the 12th mitigate the harm of the 12th. Otherwise, based on what you describe, she would have given up a long time ago.

Her reasons for complaining are because Mercury conjoins Saturn. And while her children are bound to be healthy, as they are represented by Jupiter in more ways than one, they are also her secret undoing.

Don't laugh at your mother. She gave you your life, give hers some respect.

I didn't mean that kind of laugh. I should have used other words. I mean shocked. In disbelief. Unable to comprehend at all why god would do this to her.
I am actually heartbroken by her horror story life. Thank you for describing the aspects. It is true that Jupiter helps ease her pain as that Jupiter represents her kids. Children are her life. She should have worked in day care but for some reason worked in a factory all her life.

I would consider myself a very successful woman and I owe it all to her. It's all because of her. I wish she could see that. Her children and her grandchildren are definitely the reason why she's still here. She most definitely will take a high place in heaven that's for sure.

When I see what she's been through it angers me to see such bad ppl in this world have it easy or to get away with bad things on a regular basis. My mother in law is one of those. She regularly gets away with awful things whilst her husband pays for her life, and then I look at my poor mum and think man, why does it have to be this way.

PS: What does this 10 chars stuff I keep seeing mean.
 
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Abby83

Well-known member
You know what, ill post both of our charts in hope that maybe someone can see what I can do to bring her the happiness she needs. I thought that being a success and praising her and telling her that I love her would be enough for her to be proud of herself, but it doesn't seem like she is realising this or 'allowing' herself to believe she is worthy of thinking thoughts like this. It's like as if the scarring of her values has stopped her from accepting that she has done the best job ever. I think only when she has passed on she will realise how much she is loved by most of us family members left on the planet. Interestingly enough, extended family and friends love her to bits. She is so popular in the Czech Republic with those relatives, but her immediate family was the problem.

Anyway, if anyone could have the time to look at the charts and see what I can possibly do to make her life better, even if it is as simple as telling her I love her every day, that would be great. My interpretation of our synastry is that we LOVE talking about health and fitness topics. I also see that my children, grandchildren (if she's still around) and my hobbies and values and money making abilities all boost her sun. That is true. Esp. seeing me make itr on my own doing my hobbies, she loves this, it makes her proud and boosts her self esteem. She loves talking about this stuff to her friends. It gives her a sense of self worth.

Ps: It's so obvious now, looking at my natal chart just how important my mother is to me with that moon in 1st house.
 

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Abby83

Well-known member
I decided to remove my comment about the laughing as it is very insensere.

How ironic, whilst we're talking about my mother's abusive upbringing, we get a phone call saying her mum was hit by a car whilst walking the dog.
 

Lin

Well-known member
Actually I knew you meant funny "strange" not funny amusing. But felt for anyone else reading it I would add that.

The reality is that sometimes people who are abused keep trying to "undo" the dynamic of childhood by gravitating toward the same type of people again and again. Like it can be "fixed" the next time. There is no sense of "injustice" to the self and not enough healthy anger.

Did she ever join a 12 step program? Even a senior can do this and get a lot out of it.
One can learn new things when older.
LIN
 

Abby83

Well-known member
Actually I knew you meant funny "strange" not funny amusing. But felt for anyone else reading it I would add that.

The reality is that sometimes people who are abused keep trying to "undo" the dynamic of childhood by gravitating toward the same type of people again and again. Like it can be "fixed" the next time. There is no sense of "injustice" to the self and not enough healthy anger.

Did she ever join a 12 step program? Even a senior can do this and get a lot out of it.
One can learn new things when older.
LIN

Hi Lin and thanks for that. I don't know what a 12 step program is but she tried to do regression with a psychologist. This psych did wonders on me. Anyway, I was there in the other room when my mother saw the psych. But she couldn't go through the process of the session because it was too emotionally difficult for her.

Yes I agree that lots of ppl who are abused struggle the most in defending themselves because they cant believe that anyone could possibly be that cruel. My mother cant seem to believe that ppl out there really are cruel. It's because she has the purest of hearts so naturally she thinks others are the same. I used to think this way too until I turned my attitude around.
 
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Claire19

Well-known member
Hi everyone,

If anyone can read an astrology chart, they will be able to see clearly that the attached chart of my mother is a terrible story. The only thing she has going for her is her children. She can also make friends and have friends if she makes the effort but she ruins it by talking about how bad her life is and how bad her life was. So really, other than that she just has me :(.

These last two yrs about everything in her home has broken down one by one and she doesn't have any money. We just cant believe it. Nothing EVER goes right for this woman :pinched:.

To keep it short, as a child my mother was physically beaten and emotionally abused as an outlet by the parents and this scarred her for life, resulting in problems with work. She experienced injustice at a very young age. Every single man in her life doesn't care about her. Her husband (Uranus in 12th) cheated on her many times, even in front of her and then said she was imagining it. He used her, and deceived her in shockingly inappropriate ways.

So other than the obvious aspects, I'm wondering if there is anywhere specific one can point to a person being unlucky? I heard that Jupiter 1st house makes a person lucky so would that mean Jupiter 12th house is unlucky? With my mother having Jupiter in the 12th I think it's not that great. Her intuition means she experiences more harm than good from all the bad things that happen. I find it odd that POF is in 10th house :unsure:.

Uranus in the 12th has nothing to do with cheating unless it is involved with the sex planets somewhere.
 

RaRohini

Well-known member
Hi !
Firstly i feel very sorry for what your mother had to undergo. I can give you a honest reading hoping it will not offend anyone.
As per vedic placements i can say this :
Ascendant Cancer Pashyami the nurturer par excellence , ruled by the Moon. Moon is placed in Sagittarius Purvashada the wild one, the gypsy, the mermaid of the ocean. If you look at the Mahadashas then from 1978 until 2013 she has been completely under the same star sign..Sagittarius Purvashada the gypsy. Because her Moon,Mars and Rahu are all in this sign in the 6th house of service,enemies and debts. Ketu is in Gemini Ardra the angry one in the 12th house of surrender. So one may say that her problems may be due to the attitude of 'Just do it' which is the nature of Sagittarius P.Ashada. This sign finds it very difficult to 'submit' and 'bear' ..So they just leave the scene and start afresh, instead of working through the problem. You may be hearing only her side of the story. Have you tried listening to the other side?Anyways she had to lead the gypsy life all these years.Also her Saturn is in Libra Swati the smoking, ambitious guy in the 4th house of home and homeland. Hence she kept attracting these kind of guys.
Thankfully after 2013, she is in Jupiter Dasha which is favourable. Her heart lies in nurturing and providing for others in a motherly way. She is very good at that.She may finally find some solace in this sort of role either at home or workplace. The gypsy life can stop.
Let her do as her spirit wills ! God bless!
 

Abby83

Well-known member
Hi !
Firstly i feel very sorry for what your mother had to undergo. I can give you a honest reading hoping it will not offend anyone.
As per vedic placements i can say this :
Ascendant Cancer Pashyami the nurturer par excellence , ruled by the Moon. Moon is placed in Sagittarius Purvashada the wild one, the gypsy, the mermaid of the ocean. If you look at the Mahadashas then from 1978 until 2013 she has been completely under the same star sign..Sagittarius Purvashada the gypsy. Because her Moon,Mars and Rahu are all in this sign in the 6th house of service,enemies and debts. Ketu is in Gemini Ardra the angry one in the 12th house of surrender. So one may say that her problems may be due to the attitude of 'Just do it' which is the nature of Sagittarius P.Ashada. This sign finds it very difficult to 'submit' and 'bear' ..So they just leave the scene and start afresh, instead of working through the problem. You may be hearing only her side of the story. Have you tried listening to the other side?Anyways she had to lead the gypsy life all these years.Also her Saturn is in Libra Swati the smoking, ambitious guy in the 4th house of home and homeland. Hence she kept attracting these kind of guys.
Thankfully after 2013, she is in Jupiter Dasha which is favourable. Her heart lies in nurturing and providing for others in a motherly way. She is very good at that.She may finally find some solace in this sort of role either at home or workplace. The gypsy life can stop.
Let her do as her spirit wills ! God bless!

It's very nice of you to respond and give your insights, but unfortunately the only thing that fits with my mother was the part about her being a good nurturer and motherly. She in no way has that Sagittarian attitude or gypsy life. I find that her life has hardened her up and made her more Capricorn like. She is more like a father and mother to me (her south and north nodes in cancer and Capricorn). I did see the other side of the story and when they thought I wasn't looking I saw the abuse my mother was talking about. They try to hide it and put on an act when im around but then they forget and let their guard down and the habitual abuse kicks in. As for my father (mother's husband) I saw everything my mother said about him because he did the same to me!
 

RaRohini

Well-known member
It's very nice of you to respond and give your insights, but unfortunately the only thing that fits with my mother was the part about her being a good nurturer and motherly. She in no way has that Sagittarian attitude or gypsy life. I find that her life has hardened her up and made her more Capricorn like. She is more like a father and mother to me (her south and north nodes in cancer and Capricorn). I did see the other side of the story and when they thought I wasn't looking I saw the abuse my mother was talking about. They try to hide it and put on an act when im around but then they forget and let their guard down and the habitual abuse kicks in. As for my father (mother's husband) I saw everything my mother said about him because he did the same to me!

Hope she finds solace. But do ask HER if what i said is right.. not through your lens but hers.
 

RaRohini

Well-known member
What i meant was a gypsy mind.. a wandering mind.All experiences are meant to teach us something so that we may reach a higher scale of ascension. Sorry if i sounded rude there Abby83, wishing her peace under present circumstances.
 

Noemi

Member
What I see in her chart is;

  1. Strong influence of Scorpio; Venus in Scorpio (ruler of 4th hoouse) square Pluto - it points tendencies to come into hard, obsessive relationships which is carried out from the home, I could suspect weird, abusive relationship with father especially.
  2. Capricorn goes darker; Moon in Capricorn usually idicates difficulties in relations with mother, when we add a Saturn in Scorpio (the ruler of 6th and 7th houses) it shows us a darker side of himself. He sits in 4th house and tells about barriers, all the hardness from childhood that can impact on her future life, leaves many scars.
  3. Sun addicted to the past Asc in Leo - Sun in Libra is debilited + Sun conjunct IC an we have another strong influence of past things, a problem with abandoning previous, bad experiences and move forward.

But I'm an adherent of looking for strong points;
and your mother has a green light from Moon sextile Saturn to work on all the things that happend. Literally work on this, because of the signs and strong 6th house and it tells about healing through hard-working and I mean both therapy (maybe Hellinger method will be helpful) and finding a passion (5th house in Scorpio, Venus sextile Mars in Capricorn 6th house) she could put her whole heart into.

Wish you lot of luck :)
 
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unique_astrology

Well-known member
Abby's Mother - Oct 4 1954, 11:45 pm, CET -1:00 Brünn > Brno Czech Republic 49°N12' 016°E37' Geocentric Tropical Zodiac

Natal Neptune is on the Sun/Saturn midpoint of your mother's chart. Reinhold Ebertin in his "The Combination of stellar influences" under psychological correspondences lists a negative trait of this combination as "the inclination to be a pessimist.".

Not seen but it is a fact. Saturn is within one and one half degrees of an exact square to your mother's chart's ascendant (on the Nadir). The nadir is an exact 90 degree square to the ascendant in real space. The midpoint of Mercury and Saturn is almost exactly square the ascendant of her chart - a strong influence towards a negative outlook.

What she experiences daily, or often, will help shape her outlook . The expression of love from you and your children as often as possible is a large part of the answer.

Learning and believing that 'bad luck' is not responsible for her life but her response to difficult times in her life (we all have them) is what she has to live with as she goes through them and after they have passed is her choice to make for herself.

Love, love, love.
 

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aquarius7000

Well-known member
Hi,

Your Mother, per your chart, has been and is more than there for you. The Moon in the first, conjunct a strong Jupiter.

Your mother's 5th house (children) ruler, Mars, is exalted, which shows an excellent relationship with the child. Are you the only child? Mars in the 6th house (of service) shows that the child will be a helping hand in times of need. Has she had some good career life? Been employed always? With Mars, though exalted, but in the 6th house and the Leo Sun in its fall, she must have had an average position only perhaps in her work place.

Venus is another planet that is weak in her chart being in its sign of debilation in Sco. Venus rules her 4th house of family and her 11th house of friends, which are her weak points. Venus trine an exalted Jupiter means she will make plenty of friends (as you said), but Jup. in the 12th (isolation) and Jup conj. Ura means they might make themselves scarce suddenly, or just disappear.

Transit Jup over her 4th house could mean that things get renovated at home (so there are new fixtures, etc. In some way, there might be some expansion on the home front. As of June, a somewhat better period should start when Jup moves forward again. Pluto hovering over her 5th house shows trying times for her kid(s), too, so hopefully you can hold up with her.

She has it tough financially given that her 2nd house ruler, the Sun, is in its fall. The 2nd significator of finances, Venus, is debilitated. The 3rd significator of finances, the Moon, is also in its sign of debilitation. To top it all off, unfortunately, there is Pluto in the 2nd, which shows her the extreme situations, and makes it worse by squaring her Venus. I do feel rather sorry for her because she seems like a very hardworking woman, one that doesn't quit easily (Mars and Moon in Cap).
 
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