Turning point please help

Hi, looking for some insight. I am at a braking point in my life and am finally ready to get the help that I should have been getting for years. Unfortunately It took me hurting the most important person in my life. Who I have faith and hope will return back to me after some hard work for myself and for us. I have a long list of tragic and trauma from childhood and current. I'm looking to find out why I feel the need to reach out to people I shouldn't and really don't have interest in. Why I seek this attention. Will I be able to fix this. Thank you


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