Sex Addicts And Aspects

[aquarius7000]

All, some (minimal) editing (as of now) has been done on this thread. As much as as sex is a natural part of all our lives, please take note of what the AW forum rules have to say (esp as we are on the worldWIDEweb and accessible to all: young & old).

Ethical rules to observe

Your participation on this forum is allowed and welcomed as long as you warrant that you will not post any messages that are obscene, vulgar, sexually-oriented, harmful to young people, hateful, racist, offensive, threatening, defamatory, damaging, or otherwise violative of any laws.

Please bear the above in mind while posting, and stick to Astrology mainly, esp with such delicate and easy-to-get-out-of-hand subjects.

Thank you for your understanding.
Moderator

 

[Phoenix's Song]

Aquarius7000:

Oh, I'm sorry!

Of course I understand, I didn't know minor-age people could get a registration here. Please, sorry.

Sex is a natural part of the life but, to me, is as natural as eating, breathing, talking about phylosophy, psicology, ecology, friendships, politics or anything else... My misstake, I tend not to realise that sex issues could be unapropiate to someone.

Thanks for the edit, I would try to write without making misstakes

 

[Phoenix's Song]

Cypocryphy:

I'm really glad to get a well expressed answer, thanks!

Everything you said was right. Of course, It's not different as any other human with adicction troubles. I'm not going to say "hijo de puta" but I still support the idea of using a prettier euphemism: Sexopathy.

As a semantic point of view -but not related with astrology- an adicction is something that ruin the life of the adiccted. By definition, sex adicction means nymphomanie, which is a psychiatric condition that affect the posibility of the adiccted to mantein a job, have a good relationship with the family, or even have a couple without cheating.

I would say... It's like the difference between dedicating your entire life to eat without moving from bed and ending with heavy healt problems or, just, having a compulsive need and desire to eat but still mantaining a good figure, working, going out with friends and having a life besides the compulsive desire.

I like the part of "lack of balace". Most people describes me as a "Too much too much" personality but I would say It's just a "personality too concentrated".

I'm aware of the "Me" factor in my Natal Chart. I also live it that way: There are my issues or the other people issues or the Universe issues but NEVER our issues or a group issues. I don't concibe the group factor at all. I have an exclusive Individual way of thinking about myself or the others, even experimenting a high level of "humanity analisis though". I hate being on groups. I don't tolerate to go out dancing, working in a group or being in places with too much people. Everything gets superficial to me when I'm in a group, specially people. I reject that, feeling that groups have no intensity because they lose the Individual factor. I love the "You and Me" relationships, but never a "We".

I completly agree with the fact that Mars conjunction Pluto means either Growth or Destruction. You suprise me by saying that focusing in Sex with Love is a solution. Is SO like that. SO. The Destructin factor appears when I'm not in a relationship. Even If I want to be self-centrated when I don't have a couple... I can't. I try to do my best but every lover I have turns crazy. That scares me. I've seen a lot of "normal and mature" people loosing their mind [mod edit - deleted explicit text] with me and making irrational, extremly irrational, things. So, a couple relationship is just perfect. There's no damage there because I canalize all the energy just in one person... and that's pretty and healty and full of daily and constant pleasure!

Your analisis of Venus conjunct Uranus is like that. I can't go deeper in that aspect because It's so strong that I couldn't modified my behavior. I will love to do it but there are no "grey colours" or "middles" in my life. I hate or I love, as you say. That's so underground that I express myself in "I LOVE IT! IT'S TOO PRETTY! I REALLY LOVE IT!" or "I hate it and someone is going to pay for it" terms since I was born

In fact, that's related with the Lover vs. Husband thing. If I love it, that person will be my Husband and I'm going to give every inch of my life to dedication and devotion to him. If I hate it... well, please become pizza, and QUICKLY!

There's a polarity so extreme that depends on a simple one night experience. I love it or hate it and I know it from the first time. No second chances.

In the other hand... I always had the tendency. Perhaps I wasn't like this until my 14 years old. Before that, I had a strong tendency but It wasn't related with humans. That's was strange but my libido was proyected to cartoons between my four to my elevens years old. I used to had obssesive and high fantasies with Jessica and Roger Rabbit, Donatelo from the Ninja Turtles (in fact, my first sexual fantasy), Sailor Moon, the Horse of Rainbow Bright... well, every single thing that was consider pretty, glamorous, stylelish, seductive and interesting in my childhood. Then, at my elevens, I realise that sex what related with humans.

At my 14 that stoped being just a mind-sex matter to become a matter of other people high interest on me. I discover a potential, It was really adictive, It was an easy way to get power, It was an extremly efective way to manipulate and, just because of that, turns into an IDENTITY.

But, besides everything, I would say: More than an addiction itself, is an obsesion proyected to compulsion resulting on an adicction.

Your text was really helpful, thanks you!

P.S to the admin: Please correct me if I said something unapropiate. I don't think so but, perhaps, I didn't realise if I made a misstake. Thanks and sorry If I did something wrong.

 

[Arian Maverick]

Thank you for sharing your experience, Phoenix.

I've struggled with obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors for most of my life, but oddly enough, these have never assumed a sexual dimension. I'm now trying to determine why this may be because I have an emphasis upon the sign Aries and my chart ruler, Mars, is out-of-bounds. I've read that yod configurations are associated with compulsions, and I've got two of them in my natal chart--one with apex Mars, and the other with apex Pluto, which is in Scorpio in the eighth house. Why am I not a sex addict?

I think what "saved" me in this regard is Mars' position in a cadent house--the third house, in Gemini--and a strong angular Saturn, which aspects many planets in my natal chart.

This leads to the question: What astrological factors may incline an individual towards addiction to sex, rather than towards more general compulsive behaviors?

Arian Maverick

 

[aquarius7000]

Phoenix, thank you for sharing your experience. However, as I already mentioned, let us have some (more) Astrology now. Would you thus like to put up your natal chart here, and get the astrological ball rolling by pointing out some of the aspects/configs, which you feel might be relevant to the subject at hand (like the Plu-Mars aspect you noted)? Since sex belongs to the 5th house, look at how your 5th house is doing in terms of its ruler and the planets in there. Look at placement of planets in the cardinal houses of action/ fire (since you mentioned that you are often the active party); look at aspects of Pluto (re manipulation, power and control, obsession), etc, etc.

AQ7

 

[Phoenix's Song]

Aquarius7000:
As I said, I'm not pretty good with my English. I understand that you asked me if I could upload my Natal Chart?

I'm going to, but I'm not sure which was the question, since I couldn't properly translate it.



Simple version:



I might understanded your question in a wrong way, sorry if this hasn't anything to do with your point. It's very embarasing not having a good English level, heh

 

[wilsontc]

bucket chart, to Song

Song,

You said:

It's so strong that I couldn't modified my behavior. I will love to do it but there are no "grey colours" or "middles" in my life. I hate or I love, as you say. That's so underground that I express myself in "I LOVE IT! IT'S TOO PRETTY! I REALLY LOVE IT!" or "I hate it and someone is going to pay for it" terms since I was born

In fact, that's related with the Lover vs. Husband thing. If I love it, that person will be my Husband and I'm going to give every inch of my life to dedication and devotion to him. If I hate it... well, please become pizza, and QUICKLY!

There's a polarity so extreme that depends on a simple one night experience. I love it or hate it and I know it from the first time. No second chances.

You also have a bucket chart with (home, also emotions) (energy is combined with) Descendant (others) as the "handle", indicating you "pick things up" in your life based on how you feel about others around you. As you say, this is about doing things in your life because of that strong "feeling" about how the relationship is working.

Bucketing,

Tim

 

[Awakened_Pisces]

Re: bucket chart, to Song

That is further empathized by Black Moon Lilith in the Seventh House, not only is miss Lilith there, but she's also inside the fixed sign Taurus! Lilith is the legend of the women who was raped and beaten horribly, as such she became a woman who held a vicious vendetta against men. With Lilith trining your Juno I imagine that is why you might be tempted to manipulate people with sexual needs.

[changed the wording so it was less "attacking" of the poster - Moderator]

 

[hermetic]

Re: bucket chart, to Song

Phoenix, I was just reading thru this thread and felt the need to point out something you've skipped/almost disregarded in your delineation - Chiron in 8th

I think as with all addictions - there has to be a wounding point so this where Chiron fits. And the compulsive behavior is more than powerful physical desire, it is a accounted as psychological symptom once it crossed the point of addiction. You say yourself how you behavior is very manipulative to get what you want, very Scorpio-like and 8th is a Scorpio house.
I am posting some excerpts of possible manifestation of this position, and of course it can vary. But I believe it deinitely adds to the whole picture in your case

Chiron in the Eighth House
+What a great sex therapist you can be. A more likely scenario is that you have the ability to bring out the sexual best in a romantic partner, while giving yourself the short end of the stick (no pun intended). But the 8th house rules more than sex. You could also get stuck with taking care of partnership resources because "you're so good at it," or, conversely, keep getting partners who want to "take care" of it and do you out of your fair share. Perhaps you become too dependent on money from others for support, or too much of what you earn goes to support others. You might tend to accept other people's values (your family, group or society) too readily. One other thing. The myth of Chiron can actually come alive with this placement. You could have a talent for healing or rehabilitating others, but not yourself.
!Chiron is associated with the emotional wounds we receive early on in our lives. The sign Chiron is in will dominate but the house placing will show in which area the personality is motivated and into which they will put their efforts. In the eighth house, it may indicate losses through the death of loved ones but also gains through births. Personal desires will be very important to you, to the point of 'anything goes'. You will have psychic abilities that, when trained, will be a great force for good. You could be a mystic with great insight.

CHIRON IN THE 8th HOUSE means strange, possibly sadomasochistic attitudes also within the sexual life. You have big healing and regeneration forces and deep occult knowledge. Surely you get in contact with power structures or even hold a position of power by yourself, however, both possibilities could cause difficulties. Then you perhaps seek for revenge and rage against something or someone, retreating later. This position often promises strong self-restraint and fears of death, the own and that of others, as well as symbolic deaths. In this position owner-seizing tendencies can be found eventually, which then usually aim for security. Inheritances play a role. Profits and losses of material or financial kind can develop themselves here in dramatic or even dangerous ways. This position clearly has a karmic touch. Human beings usually are confronted inevitably with the consequences of their acting or omitting here. A conscious becoming of these circumstances can lead to fearfulnesses, sometimes managed by self-restraint. Possibly from the chironic, karmic mischief comes the knowledge that the chironic healing is a result of recognizing that all negative actions are followed by negative consequences.

from cafeastrology

 

[waybread]

Well, there is the healthy and pleasurable side of an acitivity enjoyed to its fullest, and Portnoy's Complaint taught a generation about the adventures of a strong libido with no legitimate outlet for expression. Unfortunately some people with this propensity were sexually abused as children. They were too young to process what happened to them, and consequently obsessively express their undigested experiences as teenagers and adults. Moon/Pluto would be something to consider in this regard, as the moon deals with pre-rational early childhood conditioning.

 

[poshslob]

What do you think of a person who has Venus in Virgo in the 8th (sex house), and Mars in Taurus in the 5th (sex house)?

Also Sun, Mercury in Leo in the 8th and Moon in Taurus in the 5th.

8th house ruled by Sun (sun in the 8th), 5th house ruled by Venus (Venus in the 8th)

 

[poshslob]

I think that as long as the person don't have any problems with it, he/she should not care about others opinions.

/JJ

It's my chart. I wanted to know what others think of these placements.

 

[waybread]

What do you think of a person who has Venus in Virgo in the 8th (sex house), and Mars in Taurus in the 5th (sex house)?

Also Sun, Mercury in Leo in the 8th and Moon in Taurus in the 5th.

8th house ruled by Sun (sun in the 8th), 5th house ruled by Venus (Venus in the 8th)

The 8th house deals with intense experiences such as sex-birth-life-death-rebirth. The 5th is not "the sex house" so much as it is "the play house" or "the party house." Traditional astrologers put love affairs here in the same way that they tucked in gambling, the theatre, horse racing, hobbies, and amusements/entertainment of various kinds. Also children, who are playful by nature; and various forms of self-expression. Under "love affairs" we might also consider light-heared flirting.

In earth signs, you may indeed be a very sensual person.

But a lot depends upon the aspects (if any) between these planets. A trine should indicate an easy "go with the flow" whereas a semi-square would put more tension and drive into the Mars/Venus relationship.

 

[poshslob]

The 8th house deals with intense experiences such as sex-birth-life-death-rebirth. The 5th is not "the sex house" so much as it is "the play house" or "the party house." Traditional astrologers put love affairs here in the same way that they tucked in gambling, the theatre, horse racing, hobbies, and amusements/entertainment of various kinds. Also children, who are playful by nature; and various forms of self-expression. Under "love affairs" we might also consider light-heared flirting.

In earth signs, you may indeed be a very sensual person.

But a lot depends upon the aspects (if any) between these planets. A trine should indicate an easy "go with the flow" whereas a semi-square would put more tension and drive into the Mars/Venus relationship.

Thanks Waybread!

My Venus is at 11 Virgo and my Mars is at 21 Taurus.
So if you look at a wide orb of 10, then there is trine.
If you keep the orbs less than that, then there is no aspect between Venus and Mars. What does it mean to have no aspect between Venus and Mars? (sorry if this is too stupid a question)

 

[waybread]

poshslob, it simply means they are not closely engaged. Everyone has Mars and Venus going on in their lives, but aspects that they make to other planets would say more about how they function. 10 degrees of orb seems to wide for me, but I would include it if either Venus or Mars is part of a conjunction or stellium with a close aspect to Mars or Venus, because then you get midpoints and transits more closely involved.