Hi Sequestra. Your chart seems to divide fairly neatly into two main configurations, especially if you use slightly smaller orbs and therefore lose Mercury aspects to Neptune and Pluto.
There's the Jupiter Uranus rising in Sagittarius opposite Moon in Gemini setting, with both ends of the opposition in flowing aspect to Mercury in Aquarius in the 3rd house (Mercury's own house and the house naturally associated with Gemini)
And then there's Sun, Venus and Mars in the water sign Pisces (with Sun in the watery 4th house and Venus and Mars in Pisces emphasising the watery nature of the Sun's natural house the 5th, which has its cusp in Pisces), with the watery planets Neptune and Pluto aspecting Sun, Venus and Mars too.
The contrast between these two themes may be something you feel very strongly. One could hardly think of a more perfect configuration than the first one for the joyful pursuit of understanding - a sense of life as an endless treasure hunt for knowledge and perhaps faith/meaning.
But the second theme would seem to be the one that reflects that which undermines you and turns you in on yourself - perhaps sometimes in destructive ways. The involvement of Saturn with Pluto may reflect a sense of imminent destruction of those things which give you a sense of security and self-respect, and the fact that the aspect between the Sun and the Saturn Pluto conjunction is a trine does not necessarily mean that it your Sun will delight in, and feel supported by these two 'heavies' of the planetary pantheon.
By squaring Mercury, and therefore challenging you to learn thoroughly and communicate with integrity, Saturn kind of hinges the two themes together. But like the Sun, it is in a watery sign and house - and these two planets of ego formation being so immersed in the watery realm suggests a porousness and vulnerability of selfhood.
I would say that valuing feelings is the way to go with this chart, because without this your building blocks of individuality (Sun and Saturn) are not at your disposal. It seems likely that you are already aware that you are on a journey, a process, which will take you through many difficult feelings such as anger, resentment, guilt, forgiveness of hurts done to you, loneliness, and grief.
I wouldn't be all that surprised if you experienced manic-depressive type fluctuations. The first theme I mentioned above could provide an attractive escape route from the burdens of emotional vulnerability - and the Pisces planets might buy into it due to the endless thirst for the ideal of Pisces.
There's something about the Venus closely conjunct Mars in Pisces in the 5th quincunx Pluto in the 12th too. I can't quite get a handle on it, but Mars and Venus reflect one's appetite for life on the everyday level. In Pisces in the 5th there could be a strong desire to be something really special, but Pluto on the 12th cusp is suggesting that dark emotional undercurrents have been handed down the generations because none of your recent ancestors wanted to face them honestly. One possible manifestation of this part of your chart is the manipulative use (by your caregivers) of your need to feel special when you were a child, ending with you feeling bitter and betrayed. Venus, Mars and Pluto all have a lot to do with sexual expression, so it could have taken an overt and particularly sinister form.
I don't know if any of this will be relevant to you, but these are the things that jump out at me looking at your chart with your post in mind.
So you struggle with this too? First thing jumping out to me is that strong mars squaring your saturn/neptune conjunction (but I'm no expert). I really want to hear what others have to say about your chart. What are your thoughts?
