Need some advice about my Cancer/Capricorn relationship

[cancerfotochik]

Okay, a bit of a long story, but here goes..

There is this guy I've known for almost two years (I'll call him Matt, for clarity's sake), we worked together at least once a week. I don't know Matt's full astrological profile, b/c I don't know what time he was born, but I do know that his Sun is in Capricorn, and his Moon is in Pisces. Birthdate is 01.02.1971, born in TX. My chart is attached below.
Okay, so I liked Matt from the start as a person, he's kinda goofy, but at the same time serious and can be very sweet, as I have gotten to know him a little better. About a year ago or so, I noticed he started 'picking' on me at work a bit, whereas before, he was pretty shy around me and we didn't talk a whole lot. Anyway, so he was kinda flirty and picking on me like I said, and this went on for awhile.
Around a month and a half ago, out of the blue at work, as I was leaving, he followed me outside and kind of covertly asked me if I'd like to go out with him sometime. I was shocked but said yes immediately, cause I really liked him as a person. He told me that he'd had a crush on me for awhile, and that's why he'd been picking on me at work, lol! I was delighted, it was very sweet what he said, and well, this really plays on my cancerian/piscean romantic nature.
So, I waited, and waited, lol, for him to make the first move and actually take me out. I knew Caps are usually pretty slow going when it comes to love, so this didn't alarm me much. It took him about a week to call me, and we talked for a bit, mostly about work, and have exchanged texts here and there since then. A couple of weeks ago, his dad died, which kind of slowed things down, which I totally understood, I just let him know that I was there for him if he needed me. Finally, tho, this past Sunday nite, he texted me and said he could use some company, so I went over to his place. I was pretty floored at how the next 12 hours progressed. We laid there on his bed and talked and held each other for this whole time, he was very affectionate and barely let go of me at all. There were a couple of intense make-out sessions, although at one point during the first one, he stopped and said that he felt like he'd gone too far already, and I told him that I thought it was too soon (for sex). He was very understanding, although, that didn't stop him from trying again a little later, lol! Not that I minded really, his erotic overtures were very gentle and almost loving, it seemed like, and very focused on pleasing me without going too far. I was blown away to say the least, it really opened something inside me that made me really start falling for him in a big way. I literally cannot stop thinking about him. Being there with him felt so natural and comfortable, and I rarely feel this way about romantic relationships, since I've had some pretty lame experiences in so called 'love', and one really bad marriage. I find it difficult to let myself be comfortable around a man unless I know he is really interested and cares about me. With Matt, though, it was really different. Not my first Cap boyfriend, I dated one for about 6 months before Matt, and even though the relationship did not work out, we remain good friends. The relationship really helped me see the error of my ways in the way I deal with guys. It brought about a very significant transformation in myself, which has changed a lot about my perspective on life in general. (Maybe the Universe's way of preparing me for my current situation...?)
Anyway, to tie this novella up here, I really really want this thing with Matt to work out, b/c he really is a very nice, upstanding guy, and very affectionate, which is what I need for a relationship to even begin. I have read up quite a bit on Caps, and I know that they don't usually start anything with a woman unless they really like them a lot. This makes me excited, but I also know that there are other issues in his chart that may make a difference in how this relationship unfolds. Its been very slow-going so far, as expected, however, I am a bit worried about his moon in Pisces, knowing from great experience that Piscean influence can make a person wishy-washy at times. (My heart was pretty much broken to bits by a Piscean.)
My biggest concern though, is something kind of uncomfortable that I will have to tell him before we have sex. I have had genital herpes and hpv for about the past 10 years. So, understandably, I am quite nervous about having to tell Matt this. I know that I have to tell him before we have sex. However, I am so worried that he may be just looking for sex, not that he really strikes me as that kind of person, but he is a GUY after all, and we all know that guys love their sex and will do a lot to get it! Anyway, I am really sensitive, and I'm not sure how he will react to this info about me, so naturally, I am afraid to tell him. I guess my biggest fear is that he will be upset and reject me, which will definitely make me cry, which I don't want to do that in front of him! We have plans to see each other this weekend, and I am pretty sure that will include some cuddly time, which may lead to more, and I will end up having to tell Matt my unfortunate secret.
SO, I am feeling all sorts of scared and halfway in love, and not sure how this will turn out. I was hoping that someone here could give me some advice as to how this situation might turn out, or how you think he will handle this info about me, just to help ease my fears about it.
Thanks

 

[bittermoon]

You might want to cast a horary chart instead. You can't see from your natal chart how somebody else is going to react to your issue.

 

[cancerfotochik]

You might want to cast a horary chart instead. You can't see from your natal chart how somebody else is going to react to your issue.

Thank you for clueing me in on that, Bittermoon. Up until today I had never really heard of a Horary Chart. I have always used Tarot or I Ching for prediction purposes. I have cast the Horary, and have attached it below. Hopefully this is right, posting it here instead of on the Horary thread.

 

[bittermoon]

May I suggest you post on the horary board? Also, from my understanding, when asking the question, a question with a yes or no answer works best.

Unfortunately, I've only recently taken an interest in horary. Therefore, I do not feel qualified to read your chart.

 

[LonelyRed]

I think this is a unique way to use a Horary Chart. You appear to be trying to measure or gauge someone's reaction to a piece of news you are going to share. This may be too "prediction-y" for Horary, but I suppose that remains to be seen, since I'm no expert. Now, if I read the chart as you posted it, this horary chart, I might be inclined to give you a positive reading. I just again want to point out though that this is questionable, in my humble opinion, that this is a horary chart. Usually, as I understand it, you need something quantifiable (like an actual object), and/or something which can be determined on a yes or no basis. I'm not super familiar with the logistics around Horary, but I know that your question may be much too dependent on factors not typically associated with Horary, like HIS natal chart.

But, I did say positive reading, and by that, I will go forth and point out that here you are Mercury, which is in Gemini, in the 10th, conjunct the Sun, so this certainly has tapped into the fact that this has to do with your image and how you come across to someone else. Sun here is a good thing, since it is kind of like you are shining a light on something that is making you a nervous (very Virgo to express concern about the impact of something and that is the sign the ASC is in). Now according to this chart, when it is Mercury and Jupiter like this, it may indicate a friendship, but remember this could be good since friends are people you can share this information with. He is Compassionate Pisces, with ruled by Jupiter in the 8th, so it appears he could handle this change and its pertinent significance to the sex organs. There is a wide-sextile here between you and him and considering that planets involved, I'm assuming there is some travel to see each other, you knew each other at another point in your life, and you both represent significance for each other. What I don't see is anything indicating love, but this as a "Horary" reading has already been stretched beyond what might normally be considered Horary, so I wouldn't fret about me not seeing elements of love in a chart cast having little to do with that. It more just reflects how this chart doesn't really deal precisely with the issue at hand, if you now what I mean. You want to know WHAT his reaction will be (if he will still feel for you or how he will feel) and so on. All I see here is a friendship with a good means for understanding one another, and that he is a compassionate fellow.

 

[cancerfotochik]

Thanks LonelyRed, that is pretty helpful news. I did tell him last night, and he was compassionate about it, but it cooled things off pretty quickly. I asked him this morning if he was upset about it, and his words were 'no I'm not upset, I'm glad you told me. I've liked you for quite awhile, but I just don't know what to think about it.' I'm not really sure how to read that as a positive, but I'm trying to look on the bright side. He's a pretty cautious guy from what I've seen so far, so I'm not sure at all how this will turn out. He said he'd call me... Feeling pretty down in the dumps right now, but those are the breaks I guess. :/

 

[LonelyRed]

Thanks LonelyRed, that is pretty helpful news. I did tell him last night, and he was compassionate about it, but it cooled things off pretty quickly. I asked him this morning if he was upset about it, and his words were 'no I'm not upset, I'm glad you told me. I've liked you for quite awhile, but I just don't know what to think about it.'

Capricorns tend to think about things like duty, honor, and allegiance to objectives. He would never be cruel or outright rude, and his respect for you is genuine. You're welcome.

I'm not really sure how to read that as a positive, but I'm trying to look on the bright side. He's a pretty cautious guy from what I've seen so far, so I'm not sure at all how this will turn out. He said he'd call me... Feeling pretty down in the dumps right now, but those are the breaks I guess. :/

Has he called you yet?

 

[cancerfotochik]

Capricorns tend to think about things like duty, honor, and allegiance to objectives. He would never be cruel or outright rude, and his respect for you is genuine. You're welcome.

Yes he is very respectful of me. That's why I like him so much. He's a good guy.

Has he called you yet?

No, he hasn't. Not sure what to think about that. I'm trying to stay positive and just hope that he needs time to think it through. I've pretty much decided to just let him make the first move this time by calling me. I don't want to seem like I am pressuring him. So, I'm kinda in a holding pattern right now, trying to focus on other things, like natural healing and meditation, and lots of self introspection to figure out what the source of my dis-ease is and subsequently, the cause of the viral manifestation. I've been doing some readings on the situation with Matt, and they are all pointing to me needing to focus on my spiritual development.

 

[LonelyRed]

No, he hasn't. Not sure what to think about that. I'm trying to stay positive and just hope that he needs time to think it through.

I'm sorry to hear he hasn't called. Maybe he has called by now?

I've pretty much decided to just let him make the first move this time by calling me. I don't want to seem like I am pressuring him.

I don't think it would be pressuring to call him up and just check in. You dropped something significant on him and you can at least look for closure on the matter.

So, I'm kinda in a holding pattern right now, trying to focus on other things, like natural healing and meditation, and lots of self introspection to figure out what the source of my dis-ease is and subsequently, the cause of the viral manifestation.

Yeah taking care of your body and your spirit could help a lot with soothing since that was a big thing to tell someone. I hope for his sake he can see past his own fear-based associations with it and ensuing stigma around it all.

I've been doing some readings on the situation with Matt, and they are all pointing to me needing to focus on my spiritual development.

Perhaps that could mean achieving the closure you deserve on the matter, rather than staying mum out of concern. Just my two cents of course.

-LR

 

[cancerfotochik]

Hi LR,
No he didn't call me, so I texted him to see how he was. He didnt have much to say back at all. So I've pretty much figured it's a lost cause. I guess it wasn't meant to be, which is okay. Just gotta keep optimistic about it all! The situation did prompt me to do a lot of soul searching and taking care of health issues. Maybe that was the whole point of it, kind of a hurtful lesson, but I see it as preparation for the right person to come into my life. I know it's all leading up to something good, just don't know what yet!

 

[LonelyRed]

Hi LR,

Hi...

No he didn't call me, so I texted him to see how he was. He didnt have much to say back at all.

I'm curious about what precisely he said, so feel free to share it if you would like.

So I've pretty much figured it's a lost cause.

You felt he was distant from the nature of the text? I know the feeling, very funny the way with one word, or lack thereof, people tell you so much with their feelings. Maybe I pick up on it because I'm a Cancer too.

I guess it wasn't meant to be, which is okay. Just gotta keep optimistic about it all!

Well, that's very powerful!

The situation did prompt me to do a lot of soul searching and taking care of health issues.

Oh did it? How so? I'm just curious.

Maybe that was the whole point of it, kind of a hurtful lesson, but I see it as preparation for the right person to come into my life.

Exactly. He obviously is not the person for you. I mean, herpes aside, would you want to be with someone who would distance themselves from another person because that person merely had a disease? Yes it is contagious, and yes there is the potential reason behind why you have it, but the right person for you will not stigmatize you nor anyone else, nor fault them for it. That's how I feel at least.

I know it's all leading up to something good, just don't know what yet!

So powerful!

 

[cancerfotochik]

Hello LR, and again, thanks for your thoughts and comments on this situation. It really does help to be able to talk about this with someone who understands.

I'm curious about what precisely he said, so feel free to share it if you would like.

Here is what was texted:
me: Hi, I hope you are doing okay, and had a good week.
him: I am hangin in how r u
me: Im doing okay I guess, just staying busy mostly.
And that was the end of it, nothing back from him. I don't see this as very unusual for him, his texting style is very short and to the point.

You felt he was distant from the nature of the text? I know the feeling, very funny the way with one word, or lack thereof, people tell you so much with their feelings. Maybe I pick up on it because I'm a Cancer too.

Yes, being a Cancer, I do pick up on body language and am very intuitive, so in my eyes, I saw the rejection the night I told him. Soon after I told him, he withdrew completely physically, whereas before he was very affectionate. When I left that morning I could tell by the look on his face, as he was saying he would call me, that he wouldn't. I think I just hoped that I was wrong about that, but I usually am right when it comes to reading people intuitively.

Oh did it? How so? I'm just curious.

Well, after this whole experience, I really felt like I needed my chart read to see why I have such bad luck in relationships, and the advice I got was spot on and really helped me see some of the things I am doing to undermine my relationships. Also found out that relationships are very self-transforming for me, and this one was no different. Someone suggested that I may fall somewhere on the bipolar spectrum, which I could see the validity of that, my emotions are sometimes all over the place. I took it upon myself to look for natural supplements to help stabilize my mood, and after taking them for 4 days, it has helped tremendously! This relationship situation also prompted me to seek out natural nutritional therapy for my HPV/Herpes problem, and since I have started that, I can see a noticeable difference. I was in the back end of a breakout, but once I started taking a mixture of honey, cinnamon, and green tea twice a day, both viruses have subsided a very noticeable amount, which has made me very happy! Anti-viral meds just weren't cutting it for me, and they make me feel yucky anyway. Amazing what a raw, natural substance can do for you.

Exactly. He obviously is not the person for you. I mean, herpes aside, would you want to be with someone who would distance themselves from another person because that person merely had a disease?
Yes it is contagious, and yes there is the potential reason behind why you have it, but the right person for you will not stigmatize you nor anyone else, nor fault them for it. That's how I feel at least.

You are absolutely right! I wouldn't want to be with someone who would reject me because of that, its silly! I have a lot of good qualities, I think, and I know that the right guy will find me as soon as I ready for it!
I have always tried to look at the bright side of things, even when I am down, because I know that, just like everything else on the earthly plane, things will change and I won't always feel sad or depressed or hopeless. Good thing about feelings and emotions, they are only temporary. I find it very helpful to be the 'witness' to my feelings, and observing them as they come on without trying to judge them, or attach any kind of 'story' to them, such as what I call the 'poor me' syndrome. I try not to fall into that hole, but every now and again, I do. Im only human after all!

Have a wonderful day!
Cherie

 

[LonelyRed]

Hello LR, and again, thanks for your thoughts and comments on this situation. It really does help to be able to talk about this with someone who understands.

You're welcome. I'm so glad I could help!

Here is what was texted:
me: Hi, I hope you are doing okay, and had a good week.
him: I am hangin in how r u
me: Im doing okay I guess, just staying busy mostly.
And that was the end of it, nothing back from him. I don't see this as very unusual for him, his texting style is very short and to the point.

Oh, I see, so this was both telling of the situation and his reaction, and also typical for him in general? My first reaction, question really, is: "why didn't you bring up the point about the herpes anymore?"

Yes, being a Cancer, I do pick up on body language and am very intuitive, so in my eyes, I saw the rejection the night I told him.

Wow, even a Capricorn couldn't hide it! What made you recognize it as rejection? Did his pupils get smaller, or almost like the withdrew into his face? Or did they become shaded with that "look of change?" I'm trying to think of how I know someone is rejecting me, since it can be very subtle, but is certainly distinct.

Soon after I told him, he withdrew completely physically, whereas before he was very affectionate.

Oh my... *hugs* That is hard! He seems immature in my opinion, but I suppose giving his position/attitude, it simply makes sense.

When I left that morning I could tell by the look on his face, as he was saying he would call me, that he wouldn't.

Wow... some Capricorn to make niceties like that. Maybe part of him really did want to call you again, you know? Had you slept over?

I think I just hoped that I was wrong about that, but I usually am right when it comes to reading people intuitively.

Well, I know for me, if my intuition is telling me something about someone's behavior that isn't congruent with what they are saying, then it is really something up with them that I could not change.

Well, after this whole experience, I really felt like I needed my chart read to see why I have such bad luck in relationships, and the advice I got was spot on and really helped me see some of the things I am doing to undermine my relationships.

I know, astrology is so great for that. I'm glad you got some help that you deserved. I know with Pisces Rising, it is very important that you surround yourself with people who support you with a nurturing and constructive attitude about things.

Also found out that relationships are very self-transforming for me, and this one was no different.

Yes, with Uranus in Libra square your Sun, relationships can really jolt you out of your previous way of doing things. With Venus trine Uranus, the right relationship will be always changing and evolving. Saturn is also trine Uranus conjunct Venus, so with care and diligence, finding the right relationship could be the key to self-satisfaction or a sense of accomplishment. I would imagine with these influences of Saturn and Venus from the 4th, you have a strong desire to have children, and not just the nurturing maternal affect of a Cancer?

Someone suggested that I may fall somewhere on the bipolar spectrum, which I could see the validity of that, my emotions are sometimes all over the place.

Yes, I could support this assertion. Moon is opposed Uranus, so your moods can shift and change out of nowhere. Bipolar is a diagnosis that has become more popular, and I fear little is truly understood about the nature of moods and how they are impacted by thinking. To that end, from looking at your Mercury, Mercury in Leo means your thoughts can be consuming, and you may forget that a negative thought is just a thought (sort of like distancing yourself from your feelings, but this time your thoughts). Plus, Mercury is conjunct Mars, so if you resist the temptation to immediately act on your thoughts, or feel you must act in a certain way in order to be yourself/to feel good, then you can probably soothe some of thinking and behavior patterns. Your intuition, however, is understandably effective from what I gather here, its just dealing with what you feel "inspired" to do and that not being effective for who you are and what you need. I would imagine sometimes you do things which don't feel good or aren't very soothing and that upsets you and destabilizes your mood?

I took it upon myself to look for natural supplements to help stabilize my mood, and after taking them for 4 days, it has helped tremendously! This relationship situation also prompted me to seek out natural nutritional therapy for my HPV/Herpes problem, and since I have started that, I can see a noticeable difference. I was in the back end of a breakout, but once I started taking a mixture of honey, cinnamon, and green tea twice a day, both viruses have subsided a very noticeable amount, which has made me very happy! Anti-viral meds just weren't cutting it for me, and they make me feel yucky anyway. Amazing what a raw, natural substance can do for you.

Yes! Oh my goodness! I'm so happy for you. I struggle with these things though I am very interested, by Chiron is in the 6th square Venus in Virgo, but I have a deep interest, and I am sure I am turning to the corner to believing these things can work for me too! For you, having Pluto in Virgo means going the direction of alternative health care and self-maintenance may be something that works for you, because you represent a generation of people when this truly became noticeable in the Modern World.

You are absolutely right! I wouldn't want to be with someone who would reject me because of that, its silly! I have a lot of good qualities, I think, and I know that the right guy will find me as soon as I ready for it!
I have always tried to look at the bright side of things, even when I am down, because I know that, just like everything else on the earthly plane, things will change and I won't always feel sad or depressed or hopeless.

Oh good! I have lots of planets in Capricorn and that guy had me seriously scratching my head regarding his lack of integrity, not to mention his ignorance! I'd be curious to see his chart because I find this behavior to be a bit surprising, but then again, Capricorns can be *very* conservative, but that attitude is usually connected to other things. I wonder if he has more planets in Capricorn, if they receive squares, or if Capricorn is ruling the 2nd, 6th, or 8th houses.

Good thing about feelings and emotions, they are only temporary. I find it very helpful to be the 'witness' to my feelings, and observing them as they come on without trying to judge them, or attach any kind of 'story' to them, such as what I call the 'poor me' syndrome. I try not to fall into that hole, but every now and again, I do. Im only human after all!

Gosh that is such good advice! I need too! I'm just learning how to "observe my emotions," and not identify with them. I don't have an Aries Moon, but I do have a Capricorn Moon conjunct Mars, in the first house, opposed my Sun, so my emotions/feelings are *very* important to me. But, I guess to that end it makes sense to see them as tools, or information, or even fuel for change.

Have a wonderful day!
Cherie

You too!

-LR

 

[cancerfotochik]

You're welcome. I'm so glad I could help!

Oh, I see, so this was both telling of the situation and his reaction, and also typical for him in general? My first reaction, question really, is: "why didn't you bring up the point about the herpes anymore?"

I guess I probably should have asked about it, if he had thought about it any more, but I guess I just didn't feel like hearing bad news, lol. I tend to shy away from stuff like that, uncomfortable situations, and making people feel uncomfortable. I mean, I know I shouldn't assume what's going on in his head right now. I just think that if he really was that interested in me, he would have called like he said he would. I think he's just trying not to hurt my feelings by not doing anything about it. Which didn't work, cause my feelings got hurt anyway. I think he might be a little bit inexperienced with handling relationships, I know he's never been married. Or maybe its just because he's just incredibly selfish and wouldn't want to associate with someone like me. I really don't know. He does seem like a pretty traditional kind of a guy, goes to church, doesn't drink that I know of. Im not traditional in the least. I think its very possible that religion and/or spirituality may have been a trouble area for us even if this relationship were to continue.

Wow, even a Capricorn couldn't hide it! What made you recognize it as rejection? Did his pupils get smaller, or almost like the withdrew into his face? Or did they become shaded with that "look of change?" I'm trying to think of how I know someone is rejecting me, since it can be very subtle, but is certainly distinct.

When I left that morning, I could just tell by the look in his eyes, they just looked uncomfortable and sad. I felt like he was saying he'd call just to try to make me feel better. Even subtler, I could tell that the energy between us had changed. That's something I cant really explain, but I will say it's like almost a loss of some sort, an emptyness or lack of connection that was noticeably lost when I left that morning.

Oh my... *hugs* That is hard! He seems immature in my opinion, but I suppose giving his position/attitude, it simply makes sense.

It definitely was hard, I laid there awake all night, with him not even wanting to touch me, it seemed like. Such a different experience than when I had slept over the time before and he held me all night. The loss of that was palpable and very telling to me.

Wow... some Capricorn to make niceties like that. Maybe part of him really did want to call you again, you know? Had you slept over?

Maybe part of him did, I don't know. I guess he decided against it. Yes, I did sleep over. Part of me still feels very hurt that I could let someone could get under my skin like that and then they just sort of disappear. I feel sad that I let it get to me like that, because I do think his actions are immature. He could have at least had the nerve to tell me he didn't want to see me anymore, given me some closure at least. I know its not my fault, but still I am frustrated because even though I know all the logic and facts surrounding the situation, my emotions still have a hard time getting over it. The supplement has helped a lot with this though, the past few days haven't been nearly as hard as they were before I was taking it.

Well, I know for me, if my intuition is telling me something about someone's behavior that isn't congruent with what they are saying, then it is really something up with them that I could not change.

I agree, I feel the same way. In this situation, I really believe he was just trying to not hurt my feelings. He is a pretty considerate guy, maybe because of his moon being in Pisces.

I know, astrology is so great for that. I'm glad you got some help that you deserved. I know with Pisces Rising, it is very important that you surround yourself with people who support you with a nurturing and constructive attitude about things.

Yes, Im glad that I got some help too. I've always been fully in charge of my own mental health, and have never stopped seeking truths about myself and life in general. I've always known that once we give up trying to learn about ourselves and stop caring about the way we affect others, we tend to become too selfish and superficial. That is part of what is so wrong in the world today. I certainly don't want to be part of that statistic. Plus its just bad karma! I don't need anymore of that, lol!

Yes, with Uranus in Libra square your Sun, relationships can really jolt you out of your previous way of doing things. With Venus trine Uranus, the right relationship will be always changing and evolving. Saturn is also trine Uranus conjunct Venus, so with care and diligence, finding the right relationship could be the key to self-satisfaction or a sense of accomplishment. I would imagine with these influences of Saturn and Venus from the 4th, you have a strong desire to have children, and not just the nurturing maternal affect of a Cancer?

You know, its funny, I never did have a strong desire to have children, and soon after my son was born, I had my tubes tied. I also think, and this is hard for me to admit, but I wasn't as nurturing to my son as I wish I could have been. Vista pointed out that I do have trouble giving and receiving nurturing:

"The T square between your Sun, Moon, and Uranus is likely the main culprit for your erratic relationships. In general, Uranus in the 7th house does not lend itself to stability and generally will point to someone who likes a lot of freedom in his or her relationships. I suspect you are projecting this freedom need onto your relationships and maybe find yourself attracted to men who are not available to you in some form...could be emotionally, physically as in living too far away, they are involved with another person, or simply just not that interested in you. If this is happening, then you have not come to terms with your own freedom need. What's more, you throw in the Sun and Moon into the mix, and you have a difficult time balancing a relationship and giving and receiving nurturing."

I don't really get why I am this way, only that I have to make a decisive, conscious effort to be a more nurturing person. It has been a huge roadblock in each of my relationships. I think its because I am so afraid of getting hurt that I tend to either a)withdraw when things get uncomfortable or there is conflict or b) get very angry and argumentative when I am provoked. I have a clearly defined sense of right and wrong, and when someone is not being considerate of my feelings or even someone else's feelings, it really sets me off. This attitude and behavior does not lend itself to be nurturing, because I guess I have a tendency to not want to 'nurture' when someone has hurt my feelings. Plus, whats worse is that I do often get caught up in my own thoughts and feelings that sometimes I neglect being a more nurturing person. This is something I am trying really hard to work on...

Yes, I could support this assertion. Moon is opposed Uranus, so your moods can shift and change out of nowhere. Bipolar is a diagnosis that has become more popular, and I fear little is truly understood about the nature of moods and how they are impacted by thinking. To that end, from looking at your Mercury, Mercury in Leo means your thoughts can be consuming, and you may forget that a negative thought is just a thought (sort of like distancing yourself from your feelings, but this time your thoughts). Plus, Mercury is conjunct Mars, so if you resist the temptation to immediately act on your thoughts, or feel you must act in a certain way in order to be yourself/to feel good, then you can probably soothe some of thinking and behavior patterns. Your intuition, however, is understandably effective from what I gather here, its just dealing with what you feel "inspired" to do and that not being effective for who you are and what you need. I would imagine sometimes you do things which don't feel good or aren't very soothing and that upsets you and destabilizes your mood?

Yes, I practice being a witness to my thoughts as well as my feelings, and it has helped a lot in dealing with getting consumed by my thoughts, which I do, frequently. Every day, I have to step back and remember that I am not my thoughts, and I have a choice to act negatively or positively in each situation. I always try to come out on the positivity side, but sometimes its much harder than others. Again, part of being human. I do feel bad when I act selfishly, and acting appropriately is very important to me. I want to be more considerate and less selfish, and it appears that I struggle with this more than some people. I have a bit of a wild streak in me, I tend to be non-comformist, I buck authority if I don't believe in the ideals that they are giving out, and I get angry when I see people acting inconsiderately. I have had sexual experiences with women, which I enjoyed. Im not religious, I don't go to church. I smoke herb, and totally believe that it shouldn't be illegal, I even think that it does a lot of good it certain situations. But...all of these things are considered taboo in 'normal' society, and there is some part of me that feels the need to try to hide these things about myself because they tend to make people uncomfortable. Weird, I know... its a freaking paradox that makes me crazy sometimes. And that makes it harder for me to have a relationship, because like everyone, else, I want to find someone who understands me, and accepts me, even though I don't really follow the 'crowd,' so to speak. So far, it has been very hard to find someone who gets me. Thus, I find it hard to let go of myself to just anyone, which I guess, really is the reason why I find it difficult to nurture, both giving and receiving.

Yes! Oh my goodness! I'm so happy for you. I struggle with these things though I am very interested, by Chiron is in the 6th square Venus in Virgo, but I have a deep interest, and I am sure I am turning to the corner to believing these things can work for me too! For you, having Pluto in Virgo means going the direction of alternative health care and self-maintenance may be something that works for you, because you represent a generation of people when this truly became noticeable in the Modern World.

Yes, I really don't like western medicine, I think it is horribly misguided, in that it usually only treats the symptoms, and doesn't take care of the cause, or reason for the illness, which always starts in the mind. I believe that all illness comes from some imbalance between the mind and the body, and stress and bad nutrition is the number one cause of disease and illness. So it seems clear to me, that since organized medical care seems to be so hit and miss, natural therapies are the way to go. Plus, I can't argue with significant results, now can I?

Oh good! I have lots of planets in Capricorn and that guy had me seriously scratching my head regarding his lack of integrity, not to mention his ignorance! I'd be curious to see his chart because I find this behavior to be a bit surprising, but then again, Capricorns can be *very* conservative, but that attitude is usually connected to other things. I wonder if he has more planets in Capricorn, if they receive squares, or if Capricorn is ruling the 2nd, 6th, or 8th houses.

Yeah, me too, I wish I knew. I'd like to see his chart too, unfortunately, I doubt I will be able to get the pertinent info to do a complete chart. All I was able to determine is that he is a Cap with moon in Pisces. And, yes he does seem to be very conservative and cautious, that much I have been able gather by observation! His lack of integrity has me scratching my head also, and the ignorance I just chalk up to lack of experience.

Gosh that is such good advice! I need too! I'm just learning how to "observe my emotions," and not identify with them. I don't have an Aries Moon, but I do have a Capricorn Moon conjunct Mars, in the first house, opposed my Sun, so my emotions/feelings are *very* important to me. But, I guess to that end it makes sense to see them as tools, or information, or even fuel for change.

Yes, they are definitely tools that we can learn from. Astrology has been very helpful to me in understanding why I feel the way I do about some things. A lot of my self improvement has come from astrology based advice, and also reading a lot of self help books and spiritual texts. I did say that I am not religious, however, I do see grains of a central truth in all religions.
I identify more closely with Buddhism than any other religion, but I would not consider myself Buddhist. I love the philosophy and wisdom of most eastern religions, which is one of mindfulness, compassion and kindness to others.
I also love the words of Eckhart Tolle, I believe he has a very powerful message, which basically is: Being in the present totally and completely will bring you peace and happiness. Its all about learning how to quiet the mind enough to let the peace in!
This practice has helped me tremendously, and I have even had moments of complete and total bliss, it doesn't last very long, but when it does, its indescribable. I have had pretty good success with quieting my mind for extended periods of time, which let me tell you, as someone who gets sucked into my thoughts, it is a huge relief to be free of the incessant mind chatter that goes on in my head! It's amazing, really, and I feel that I have seen the future of spiritual evolution of the human species.
If we don't evolve spiritually as a species, we will die out as a species. Thats just how it is.. there is a sickness on this planet, and there are only two options to heal that sickness. That is: to either kill each other off in some way, whether it be natural or self imposed, or evolve spiritually. There are a lot of people out there, myself included, that believe our species is headed for a great spiritual evolution that will change life on the planet completely for the better, ie PEACE!! If you are in tune with the frequency of the energy surrounding this change, you may have noticed an increase in intuitive abilities, psychic abilities (esp telepathic with close friends or loved ones), an increase in synchronistic moments...just more of a basic sense of the connectedness we all share, that common energetic bond that underlies everything, every form. I have noticed these things, and its very exciting. I am very glad to be alive at this time, the next 10-20 years should get pretty dang interesting, lol!

Take care,
C

 

[LonelyRed]

I guess I probably should have asked about it, if he had thought about it any more, but I guess I just didn't feel like hearing bad news, lol.

I mean, my god, who wants to hear bad news?! I guess he also didn't want to be the bearer of it, and that's why he said he would see you soon/call you, but then never did.

I tend to shy away from stuff like that, uncomfortable situations, and making people feel uncomfortable. I mean, I know I shouldn't assume what's going on in his head right now.

Of course not, but it's hard not to try to figure it out since everything was so uncomfortable.

I just think that if he really was that interested in me, he would have called like he said he would. I think he's just trying not to hurt my feelings by not doing anything about it. Which didn't work, cause my feelings got hurt anyway.

Exactly. But he probably felt guilty and knew it was immature and inconsiderate to be so biased against you and say that you having herpes was a deal breaker. I think he was also concerned with "looking bad." Now THAT's more like the negatives of a Capricorn.

I think he might be a little bit inexperienced with handling relationships, I know he's never been married. Or maybe its just because he's just incredibly selfish and wouldn't want to associate with someone like me.

He's missing out, no? He sounds like he has certain things he looks for, and unfortunately for him, he mistook your disease as something which said something about you, or was of you. He didn't see you for being honest and open.

I really don't know. He does seem like a pretty traditional kind of a guy, goes to church, doesn't drink that I know of. Im not traditional in the least. I think its very possible that religion and/or spirituality may have been a trouble area for us even if this relationship were to continue.

That's very possible. He seems too conservatie, and also very limited and emotionally stunted from that.

When I left that morning, I could just tell by the look in his eyes, they just looked uncomfortable and sad. I felt like he was saying he'd call just to try to make me feel better.

And to look like a nice guy. Not a crime on his part, but he did lead you on.

Even subtler, I could tell that the energy between us had changed. That's something I cant really explain, but I will say it's like almost a loss of some sort, an emptyness or lack of connection that was noticeably lost when I left that morning.

He just completely withdrew, as if you as a person were a disease. In my opinion, he did you a favor by not calling you back.

It definitely was hard, I laid there awake all night, with him not even wanting to touch me, it seemed like. Such a different experience than when I had slept over the time before and he held me all night. The loss of that was palpable and very telling to me.

I hope you never have to go through that again. No one deserves that, especially not you. You were open, and he closed.

Maybe part of him did, I don't know. I guess he decided against it. Yes, I did sleep over. Part of me still feels very hurt that I could let someone could get under my skin like that and then they just sort of disappear.

Don't blame yourself. You were being open, and inevitably became vulnerable to someone hurting you, and that's just what happened to you. You didn't let them hurt you, you let them in, and then they hurt you.

I feel sad that I let it get to me like that, because I do think his actions are immature. He could have at least had the nerve to tell me he didn't want to see me anymore, given me some closure at least.

But even immature people can hurt others. It got to you because you cared about him, and what he thought about you. I have experienced outright rejection, and I was so crushed, I deleted a whole lot of my writing from a blog. This was writing that many people liked, but because this one guy, in his immaturity, told me he found it too sexual, I recoiled and deleted the whole thing. Meanwhile, it wasn't sexual, it my processing my own hurt in this category. He made it sound like he found it pornographic. And, if he hadn't found it pornographic, that he found my artful way of processing my pain as something he could judge as something he didn't like. Not only that, but he labeled it and me, and rejected this part of me, in favor of the label he applied to it. I mean, my god. Not to go on about myself, but I definitely still feel ashamed and embarrassed that I let anyone, anyone in this case so stupid and limited in their view of things, make me feel so dismissed and misunderstood, and above all of that, to have my art, my source of healing, rejected. But, I really liked him and so, I was crushed.

I know its not my fault, but still I am frustrated because even though I know all the logic and facts surrounding the situation, my emotions still have a hard time getting over it.

I wish there was a quick switch for this stuff. Forgiving yourself?

The supplement has helped a lot with this though, the past few days haven't been nearly as hard as they were before I was taking it. [...] I really don't like western medicine, I think it is horribly misguided, in that it usually only treats the symptoms, and doesn't take care of the cause, or reason for the illness, which always starts in the mind. I believe that all illness comes from some imbalance between the mind and the body, and stress and bad nutrition is the number one cause of disease and illness. So it seems clear to me, that since organized medical care seems to be so hit and miss, natural therapies are the way to go. Plus, I can't argue with significant results, now can I?

I'm so curious to know what this supplement is. It sounds awesome. I myself struggle with medicinal practices of all varieties, but I am a worry-wart. I love to hear about these things people do that are successful!

In this situation, I really believe he was just trying to not hurt my feelings. He is a pretty considerate guy, maybe because of his moon being in Pisces.

Oh those Pisces Moons, always so sweet and considerate, but also deceptive if they feel uncomfortable.

I'd like to see his chart too, unfortunately, I doubt I will be able to get the pertinent info to do a complete chart. All I was able to determine is that he is a Cap with moon in Pisces. And, yes he does seem to be very conservative and cautious, that much I have been able gather by observation! His lack of integrity has me scratching my head also, and the ignorance I just chalk up to lack of experience.

To me it just seems like he is concerned with how he comes across to others, but doesn't recognize that his behavior is misleading and ungrounded when he acts out of guilt.

Yes, Im glad that I got some help too. I've always been fully in charge of my own mental health, and have never stopped seeking truths about myself and life in general. I've always known that once we give up trying to learn about ourselves and stop caring about the way we affect others, we tend to become too selfish and superficial. That is part of what is so wrong in the world today. I certainly don't want to be part of that statistic. Plus its just bad karma! I don't need anymore of that, lol!

I feel like Cancers in general, when they become self-aware, are experts when it comes to their health and their moods. This awareness in turn, allows us to be so giving and considerate in the way that want to see in others. Something like being able to bring the best out of people.

You know, its funny, I never did have a strong desire to have children, and soon after my son was born, I had my tubes tied. I also think, and this is hard for me to admit, but I wasn't as nurturing to my son as I wish I could have been. Vista pointed out that I do have trouble giving and receiving nurturing:

"The T square between your Sun, Moon, and Uranus is likely the main culprit for your erratic relationships. In general, Uranus in the 7th house does not lend itself to stability and generally will point to someone who likes a lot of freedom in his or her relationships. I suspect you are projecting this freedom need onto your relationships and maybe find yourself attracted to men who are not available to you in some form...could be emotionally, physically as in living too far away, they are involved with another person, or simply just not that interested in you. If this is happening, then you have not come to terms with your own freedom need. What's more, you throw in the Sun and Moon into the mix, and you have a difficult time balancing a relationship and giving and receiving nurturing."

Wow. You must then, love giving birth to new ideas, taking care of plants, or projects, of some kind. Bringing forth something of your own creation is something vital for you.

I don't really get why I am this way, only that I have to make a decisive, conscious effort to be a more nurturing person. It has been a huge roadblock in each of my relationships. I think its because I am so afraid of getting hurt that I tend to either a)withdraw when things get uncomfortable or there is conflict or b) get very angry and argumentative when I am provoked. I have a clearly defined sense of right and wrong, and when someone is not being considerate of my feelings or even someone else's feelings, it really sets me off. This attitude and behavior does not lend itself to be nurturing, because I guess I have a tendency to not want to 'nurture' when someone has hurt my feelings. Plus, whats worse is that I do often get caught up in my own thoughts and feelings that sometimes I neglect being a more nurturing person. This is something I am trying really hard to work on...

This sounds like the impulsive energies of an Aries Moon. Maybe you should honor your need to not nurture others at all, but to nurture yourself, so that you may be more receptive to others without judging them? I am not advice-giving, I promise, so please don't be offended. These are merely my thoughts. I feel deeply about what has happened to you and the stigma attached to having herpes, so I might be coming across a little strong when I say be more gentle!

Yes, I practice being a witness to my thoughts as well as my feelings, and it has helped a lot in dealing with getting consumed by my thoughts, which I do, frequently. Every day, I have to step back and remember that I am not my thoughts, and I have a choice to act negatively or positively in each situation. I always try to come out on the positivity side, but sometimes its much harder than others. Again, part of being human. I do feel bad when I act selfishly, and acting appropriately is very important to me. I want to be more considerate and less selfish, and it appears that I struggle with this more than some people. I have a bit of a wild streak in me, I tend to be non-comformist, I buck authority if I don't believe in the ideals that they are giving out, and I get angry when I see people acting inconsiderately. I have had sexual experiences with women, which I enjoyed. Im not religious, I don't go to church. I smoke herb, and totally believe that it shouldn't be illegal, I even think that it does a lot of good it certain situations. But...all of these things are considered taboo in 'normal' society, and there is some part of me that feels the need to try to hide these things about myself because they tend to make people uncomfortable. Weird, I know... its a freaking paradox that makes me crazy sometimes. And that makes it harder for me to have a relationship, because like everyone, else, I want to find someone who understands me, and accepts me, even though I don't really follow the 'crowd,' so to speak. So far, it has been very hard to find someone who gets me. Thus, I find it hard to let go of myself to just anyone, which I guess, really is the reason why I find it difficult to nurture, both giving and receiving.

You sound like you have the temperament of an artist, and probably are nurturing through what you create.

Astrology has been very helpful to me in understanding why I feel the way I do about some things. A lot of my self improvement has come from astrology based advice, and also reading a lot of self help books and spiritual texts. I did say that I am not religious, however, I do see grains of a central truth in all religions.
I identify more closely with Buddhism than any other religion, but I would not consider myself Buddhist. I love the philosophy and wisdom of most eastern religions, which is one of mindfulness, compassion and kindness to others.
I also love the words of Eckhart Tolle, I believe he has a very powerful message, which basically is: Being in the present totally and completely will bring you peace and happiness. Its all about learning how to quiet the mind enough to let the peace in!

I haven't read Tolle, but I keep hearing great things.

This practice has helped me tremendously, and I have even had moments of complete and total bliss, it doesn't last very long, but when it does, its indescribable. I have had pretty good success with quieting my mind for extended periods of time, which let me tell you, as someone who gets sucked into my thoughts, it is a huge relief to be free of the incessant mind chatter that goes on in my head! It's amazing, really, and I feel that I have seen the future of spiritual evolution of the human species.

gosh, that sounds amazing and enlightening!

If we don't evolve spiritually as a species, we will die out as a species. Thats just how it is.. there is a sickness on this planet, and there are only two options to heal that sickness. That is: to either kill each other off in some way, whether it be natural or self imposed, or evolve spiritually. There are a lot of people out there, myself included, that believe our species is headed for a great spiritual evolution that will change life on the planet completely for the better, ie PEACE!! If you are in tune with the frequency of the energy surrounding this change, you may have noticed an increase in intuitive abilities, psychic abilities (esp telepathic with close friends or loved ones), an increase in synchronistic moments...just more of a basic sense of the connectedness we all share, that common energetic bond that underlies everything, every form. I have noticed these things, and its very exciting. I am very glad to be alive at this time, the next 10-20 years should get pretty dang interesting, lol!

I totally believe it. I am really young and I know that I definitely experience this deep pull not to be motivated by the extraneous, fading materialistic world that once motivated the generations before me. Things have changed and I acutely feel that I must do something which is spiritually guided and spiritually rewarding. I also believe in the increase of this intuitive and psychic abilities. I won the lottery listening to mine!

Take care,
C

You too.

-LR

 

[cancerfotochik]

I mean, my god, who wants to hear bad news?! I guess he also didn't want to be the bearer of it, and that's why he said he would see you soon/call you, but then never did.

Yeah, nobody wants to hear bad news, that's for sure, and I have had enough heartache in my life, I don't need any more. I've been through enough bad relationships to be able to figure out when someone isn't being completely honest. This was the case here, and I am glad I didn't push the issue. Looking back on it all, this was a powerful motivator for me, and I am treating it as such, to prepare for the next phase of my life. That is the whole point of life, to learn from our own actions and others as well, in order to bring some kind of balance and peace to our lives. Repaying karmic debt is key, also, which I believe is very important and liberating, in that it frees your spirit to be even more whole and complete than it was before we came into this world. There is so much we don't know, so much that our limited brains can't comprehend right now, but I think believing in (and following) the path we have created for ourselves, prebirth, can help us understand more about this mysterious universe we live in.

Exactly. But he probably felt guilty and knew it was immature and inconsiderate to be so biased against you and say that you having herpes was a deal breaker. I think he was also concerned with "looking bad." Now THAT's more like the negatives of a Capricorn.

Yes, you are so right. I do believe he may be concerned with looking bad, which is a shame. I hope that he can learn something from this situation.

He's missing out, no? He sounds like he has certain things he looks for, and unfortunately for him, he mistook your disease as something which said something about you, or was of you. He didn't see you for being honest and open.

Yes, I agree, things escalated so quickly between us that he really didn't take the time out to get to know me better. I think he may have had this idealistic fantasy going on in his head about me (typical Piscean influence, I've done the same thing), and unfortunately the reality of 'me' didn't live up to the fantasy of 'me'. That is very limiting behavior, one that I have really worked on because, I mean, get real, nobody ever lives up to someone else's fantasy about them. People are way too complex for that. That is why its important to accept people for who they are, and if we can't learn to do that, then our experience on this earth becomes very limiting and very miserable. (of course, I know Im preaching to the choir on this, eh? )

That's very possible. He seems too conservatie, and also very limited and emotionally stunted from that.

Agreed, his path will be a difficult one, I think. In a way, I feel really sad for him because he is going through quite a lot, with his dad dying and all, and he told me he struggles with depression, which I can relate to that very well.
He actually texted me Wednesday night, apparently he saw me driving, and texted me to say he saw me. I inquired as to how he is doing, and he said he is 'still very sad'. I asked 'was it because of his dad', and he responded, 'yes, that and the heat.' I told him that if he need a friend or someone to talk to, I'm here. He replied 'I know, thx.' I let it go after that, and haven't heard from him since. Weird. I just don't quite get his motivation. Maybe I never will, but that's not going to stop me from being his friend if he needs me in that capacity. I couldn't turn my back on a friend, especially one that is so obviously in need of some help.

And to look like a nice guy. Not a crime on his part, but he did lead you on.

Yes, it was misleading, and it does still sting a bit, but I just have to trust that this happened for a reason, as all things do.

He just completely withdrew, as if you as a person were a disease. In my opinion, he did you a favor by not calling you back.

Yes, I think a relationship with this guy would be destructive, and I would probably wind up getting the worst of it. I tend to soak up negative energy like a sponge, and Im sure there would be some negative aspects to this relationship if it were allowed to continue. I don't want to have to always try to be someone I'm not for him, which, it looks like that would be the case. I don't think I need that in my life right now. I'm trying to make my life better, not more difficult, lol!

I hope you never have to go through that again. No one deserves that, especially not you. You were open, and he closed.

Thanks, that means a lot, and I really appreciate it! I know that somewhere out there, there is a person who will accept me and love me as I am. I am patiently waiting for that person to show up!

Don't blame yourself. You were being open, and inevitably became vulnerable to someone hurting you, and that's just what happened to you. You didn't let them hurt you, you let them in, and then they hurt you.

I agree completely! I have moved on to acceptance of the situation, and have found peace in that.

But even immature people can hurt others. It got to you because you cared about him, and what he thought about you. I have experienced outright rejection, and I was so crushed, I deleted a whole lot of my writing from a blog. This was writing that many people liked, but because this one guy, in his immaturity, told me he found it too sexual, I recoiled and deleted the whole thing. Meanwhile, it wasn't sexual, it my processing my own hurt in this category. He made it sound like he found it pornographic. And, if he hadn't found it pornographic, that he found my artful way of processing my pain as something he could judge as something he didn't like. Not only that, but he labeled it and me, and rejected this part of me, in favor of the label he applied to it. I mean, my god. Not to go on about myself, but I definitely still feel ashamed and embarrassed that I let anyone, anyone in this case so stupid and limited in their view of things, make me feel so dismissed and misunderstood, and above all of that, to have my art, my source of healing, rejected. But, I really liked him and so, I was crushed.

I can totally understand that, I have had a similar situation. Its normal, I think, to feel ashamed and embarrassed when someone publicly(?) humiliates you like that. I would have probably done the same thing and deleted it all too. Some people have no tact at all, and I also feel that he was very limited in his viewpoint by not explaining better what he may have or have not meant by his statements.
The best any of us can do is just let go of the pain from it and move on, because you and I both know that dwelling on something negative is counterproductive to our mental and spiritual development. I also know that is not easy to let go of pain, simply because, biologically, our bodies come to 'love' and crave the rush of endorphins caused by our pain. It makes us feel more alive. This is not an easy thing to deal with, but I have found that a deep, heart-healing guided meditation helps a lot when I am feeling leftover pain from some past hurt.

I wish there was a quick switch for this stuff. Forgiving yourself?

Definitely! I have to remind myself every day that everything, no matter what it is, happens for a reason. If you keep to that perspective in life, its easier to forgive yourself and others when you are hurting. Everyone is our teachers, and that includes our own self, too. Now, emotions and ego may not want you to forgive sometimes, and during these moments, I validate my feelings as 'normal and okay' for this moment in time, and let them pass, as all things do eventually.

I'm so curious to know what this supplement is. It sounds awesome. I myself struggle with medicinal practices of all varieties, but I am a worry-wart. I love to hear about these things people do that are successful!

Haha, worry-wart, thats me, too, must be a Cancer thing. I totally understand the need to want to investigate things which may seem kinda 'iffy', especially natural supplements. They aren't regulated by the USDA, but you just have to do lots of research to make sure what you buy is pure. Im very lucky that we have a wonderful natural grocery and pharmacy in my small town, and they have been around for a long time, so I trust them.
As to the supplements, I have been taking these once a day, in the morning:

1000mg of ®NOW Taurine (a natural amino acid which acts as a mood stabilizer)
500mcg of B-12 (to help with the depressive state, which I am thinking of adding some St. Johns Wort to my regimen for this, even though its much more expensive)

For the herpes and hpv, I have been taking honey and cinnamon twice a day, with a cup of green tea once a day. Its amazing how quickly that started working.
There are other supplements you can take for the mood thing, including Tyrosine, Lysine, Glutamine, Choline/Inositol combo, GABA, Tryptophan, and Phenylalaline, in various dosages once or twice a day. I actually found this particular regimen online, its a regimen that the actress, Margo Kidder, takes as she suffers from severe bipolar. I started out with just the Taurine and B12 because I don't really suffer that badly from bipolar, plus all those supplements are pretty dang expensive. So, I decided to start out small and found that it has helped me already. I may decide to try get all of them at some point, because all of those supplements are naturally occurring amino acids in your brain's neurotransmitters (mood regulators), which I apparently lack. And I'll be honest, I think I did most of the neurotransmitter damage myself by taking too much of the drug Ecstasy in my 20's. It has shown in long term studies to be very damaging to the nervous system, and neurotransmitters in particular. God, I was stupid, lol, to think that I wouldn't be affected by this in the long run. So if you haven't ever taken it, don't, and count yourself lucky. It makes you feel amazing but it is so not worth it. If you have taken it, well, then Im sorry, but its not a good thing at all, very damaging stuff!
If you are having mood problems, I encourage you to try the supplement, just maybe try out the Taurine with a b vitamin, or multi-vitamin, you may find some relief from it.

Oh those Pisces Moons, always so sweet and considerate, but also deceptive if they feel uncomfortable.

That is so true!

To me it just seems like he is concerned with how he comes across to others, but doesn't recognize that his behavior is misleading and ungrounded when he acts out of guilt.

Yes, I agree. Hopefully someday he will learn. I really hope he does. I don't like to see anybody unhappy, and I think he may be unhappy more than he shows it. I can certainly relate to that.

I feel like Cancers in general, when they become self-aware, are experts when it comes to their health and their moods. This awareness in turn, allows us to be so giving and considerate in the way that want to see in others. Something like being able to bring the best out of people.

I agree, I am very self aware, I always have been. I've rarely sought out therapy, I guess because I have always thought that I know myself more than any other person could ever know me, no matter how much I tell them about myself. I do encourage others, also, to help themselves in the same way. Some of my astro-readings have suggested that I would make a good psychologist. I have taken several psychology classes and was a psych major at one time, but was informed that I would have to go to graduate school to do this. It just didn't appeal to me at the time. Plus, I am more of a creative person, and I am most happy when doing something artistic. Also, I think I may be afraid that transference would be a big problem for me if I were to continue in the Psych field. I am very empathetic, and I tend to get too wrapped up in other people's problems, even make them my own, sometimes. I don't think it would be healthy for me to continue that path even though I find it incredibly interesting.
I always find it very stimulating to converse with other Cancers, I feel like no one can understand me more than a Cancer. This is not only because we share the same sign, but because Cancers, most of them anyway, are very understanding and empathetic people. I appreciate the beauty of that aspect, and feel that the world is a better place because of us!

Wow. You must then, love giving birth to new ideas, taking care of plants, or projects, of some kind. Bringing forth something of your own creation is something vital for you.

I get quite a bit of satisfaction out of creating art, esp taking beautiful photographs of things that most people wouldn't consider beautiful. Nothing makes me feel more at peace than when I am somewhere in the world, alone with nothing but my camera as a companion. I also like to write (as if you hadn't noticed, lol), I am an accomplished seamstress, I love painting as well. I guess these are my babies, so to speak. Oh, and I love animals, dogs in particular. I have two, and consider them my children. They bring me much joy, just by having their loving presence in my life. Tolle calls them "guardians of being", and I think that is such an apt expression of their roles in our lives. Nothing brings me back into the present more completely than when I am petting my dogs. It is truly inspiring!

This sounds like the impulsive energies of an Aries Moon. Maybe you should honor your need to not nurture others at all, but to nurture yourself, so that you may be more receptive to others without judging them? I am not advice-giving, I promise, so please don't be offended. These are merely my thoughts. I feel deeply about what has happened to you and the stigma attached to having herpes, so I might be coming across a little strong when I say be more gentle!

No offense taken, I think you may be spot-on here. I have spent a lot of my life NOT being very nurturing of myself, and in doing that I have done myself a great disservice by not loving myself. Its taken me a long time to accept and love myself, and I still don't feel as if I have completely gotten there yet, hence my many failed relationships. It is the place in which I feel most stuck, and that hurts because it is the most important thing we can do, is love ourselves. I guess I feel almost 'done in' by my life experiences, sometimes the weight of it is so much I feel as if I just can't take it anymore. Some of it was brought on myself, but a lot of it wasn't, and thats the part that makes me feel so depressed sometimes. I can't quite understand why my life has to be so dang difficult. I try to be a good person, but I feel like I must not be doing enough, because I am still stuck in the same situation, financially struggling, bad relationships, not being able to get a place of my own. Its very frustrating to seem like all I am doing is pressing on the pedal of my life so hard, but my wheels just spin, and I keep getting nowhere. My biggest struggle is figuring out how to get out of this rut. A lot of it, I know, is because my lack of self confidence and self love. Im continually trying to work on this.

You sound like you have the temperament of an artist, and probably are nurturing through what you create.

Exactly!

I haven't read Tolle, but I keep hearing great things.

Tolle is wonderful, in my opinion, but Ive also seen that many people have to be in a certain place in their lives spiritually to fully understand his philosophy. Which is fine, everyone has their own path to understanding and enlightenment. I'm a big believer in whatever works for you as a person. I suggest Tolle because I have found his philosophy works for me personally, but there are so many other wonderful spiritual teachers out there who are trying to help others become more aware.

I totally believe it. I am really young and I know that I definitely experience this deep pull not to be motivated by the extraneous, fading materialistic world that once motivated the generations before me. Things have changed and I acutely feel that I must do something which is spiritually guided and spiritually rewarding. I also believe in the increase of this intuitive and psychic abilities. I won the lottery listening to mine!

Wow, I am surprised that you are very young, I had thought you were older for some reason. You must be an acutely aware 'old soul', to be so wise. I have found some interesting stuff online that talks about the younger generations being much more aware of spirituality and less concerned with the materialistic chaos created by older generations. I too, feel that same pull to not be motivated by materialistic things, but despite saying that, I also want to have enough financial security to be able to do the things I want in life. Kind of a double edged sword in my case. That makes it hard to balance between the coming change I am feeling and seeing in the world, with clinging to the old, materialistic ways I am so used to.
Im glad that your intuitive and psychic abilities have helped you financially! Winning the lottery is awesome, and if I may be so bold to ask, how did this come about? I am very curious, because every time I get a 'feeling' to buy a scratch off ticket, I always lose! I guess I may not be listening to the right feelings or maybe my negative attitude about it is sabotaging the win, I don't know. I sure would like some advice, though!
Most of my intuitive and psychic abilities seem to only activate when it concerns other people and their feelings. Or, telepathy with loved ones and friends has been coming up a lot more in my life. Just an example, the other night when Matt texted me, I was sitting at a red light in my car, and I saw that someone opposite me switched their headlights off and then back on. Don't know why, but I instantly thought of Matt, even though I couldn't see it was his truck, it was dark. I continued to think about him as I went on, and not two minutes later I heard my text chime go off on my phone, and I said to myself, thats Matt. Sure enough, it was him. I've been having these moments frequently, and its very exciting. I can only begin to imagine what is in store for us as a species, seeing all these psychic phenomena going on around me. A lot of people are experiencing this, just look on the internet. I was on this website yesterday reading about some of the stuff going on, you can check it out if you like. Here is the link:

http://www.halexandria.org/dward415.htm

I spent all day reading about this stuff, and a lot of it is very enlightening. I hope you find something useful on there, if you choose to read it. There is a TON of info on there!

Okay, well, Ive kept you long enough! Thank you so much for taking the time out to respond, I respect your advice, and I am indeed VERY grateful for your input.

Have a wonderful day!

C

 

[cancerfotochik]

Just a quick note about the B12 supplement, that dosage (500mcg) is very high, the recommended dosage is about 2-3mcg. It has been giving me headaches, I just figured out, so I am cutting that one out and Ill probably replace it with B6 and/or a multivitamin. On the Taurine bottle, it recommends taking that supplement with B6 and magnesium potassium aspartate.